PORTRAIT IN BLUE
by GoldAngel2
Summary: My first AU Kaoru is a commercial art major who has an unusual assignment...to do a portrait that has a color as a theme and so drawn to the well of sadness in her new friend Kenshin's eyes, she paints him...as both grow closer and deal with heartbreak
1. PROLOGUE THUMBNAIL

_Author's note: I know I haven't finished "A Bright Future" yet but this just whipped out of my imagination. It's my first attempt at A/U, a genre that I'm not as familiar with but after reading some excellent A/U's recently, I decided to try it. I'm using elements from my own freshman and sophomore years in college with some things that happened to me written in so this is an intensely personal piece for me. So please be kind in your reviews. The chapters are named from the separate steps in the planning and completion of a painting. As usual, I don't own Rurouni Kenshin or its characters, it is owned by Sony TV, Jump and created by the ingenious Watsuki Nobuhiro._

**PORTRAIT IN BLUE**

**Prologue—THUMBNAIL**

The pale winter sunlight shone weakly through the thin layer of high clouds, giving the sky a milky look and the air for January was unseasonably warm with a stiff breeze. The barren trees that dotted the deserted campus were waving as they stood in silhouette, their branches appearing like lace in stark contrast. The rest of the area was covered in a blanket of white from the last snowstorm, with puddles of water on the concrete walks, which were the first sign of the thaw that was taking place the week before the spring semester was to begin.

A 1979 silver Toyota Celica hatchback, loaded to the ceiling pulled into the parking lot that flanked the Campus Union building, not far from the soccer field and slid into a space as its motor quieted. Inside the car, a raven-haired girl, who sat behind the wheel turned to her passenger seat and grabbed a camera case from on top of a black leather portfolio as she opened the door to exit. She was a pretty thing, of petite stature and delicate features, wearing a powder blue down parka with white faux fur trim and she walked over to the front of her car, laying down the case on the hood.

Kamiya Kaoru opened her camera case and drew out her new camera, an Olympus OM-1 35 mm with auto adjust and lifted it to her practiced eye as she took several shots of the bleak winter landscape. She turned and shot the line of bare trees standing sentinel at the rear of the soccer field as the breeze whipped her midnight ponytail in the way of the viewfinder.

"K'so!" Kaoru expostulated in annoyance as she tossed the offending tresses back but to no avail as the wind blew them back. Sighing, she gave up and faced into the breeze to shoot the wide empty area near the CU, the snow covered picnic tables creating an interesting conflict of light and shadow from the hazy sun.

Her eyes spotted an interesting subject, a growth of shrubbery that was casting an elongated shadow on the snow, causing a pattern of crisscross that resembled a loose weave and appealed to her aesthetic taste. She mused on how it may make an intriguing watercolor after she developed the film and saw what the camera did and took several shots, finishing her roll of Tri-X film. She made a mental note to check in at the darkroom at the Photography department to see if it was open yet. After about an hour of taking photographs, Kaoru packed up her camera and headed back to the car. She climbed behind the wheel, started the engine and then drove out to head to a sprawling redwood building with white trim and shutters flanking the windows. She pulled into the parking lot and drove to an empty visitor space in front of a unit numbered D-5.

Almost immediately, the apartment door flew open and a gamin figure with intense teal eyes and an ebony braid came bounding over before Kaoru could even open her door. Makimachi Misao was bubbling in enthusiasm as she yanked the car door open to greet her best friend.

"Well, it's about time you got here!" she said in mock annoyance as she pulled Kaoru out of the Celica, and instantly engulfed her in a bear hug.

Kaoru laughed as she returned the greeting. "What were you doing, waiting at the window since I called this morning?"

Misao pulled back and favored her with a shrug and a grin. "Yeah, why not? I got nothing else to do since classes don't start till Monday. What took you so long anyway, did your old man hassle you again?"

"Uh-huh," Kaoru said shortly as she deftly changed the subject. "C'mon and help me with my stuff, okay?"

Misao looked at her with sympathy as she nodded vigorously. "You got it." And she followed Kaoru to the rear of the car and waited as she opened the hatchback.

She gaped at the load of art supplies, photography equipment, luggage and more and commented, "Boy, you sure accumulated a lot of stuff from the last semester. You pick out your major yet?"

Kaoru leaned in and began to unload her oil paint box, canvases, and easel. "Uh-uh. I haven't really decided yet but I know I want to either go into photography or illustration. I'd like to actually do both."

Misao bent down and picked up a milk crate full of paints and developing chemicals and stated, "Well, with your abilities and talents I imagine you could do both."

Kaoru grabbed another crate as she tailed Misao climbing up the short staircase to the apartment and she said, "I just don't know if I can split my time between the two curriculums. I'm living here but you know I'll have to go home every Friday afternoon right after class."

"Yeah." Misao said grudgingly knowing of Kaoru's difficult home situation.

Both girls entered the apartment and laid everything down in the first room. It was the living room which was the typical set up for off campus student housing, with second hand furniture like a beige convertible sofa, a royal blue overstuffed easy chair, a rattan rocker, a TV and stereo CD player, and a large red beanbag chair. The wicker coffee table was loaded with Misao's textbooks and notebooks with pens and highlighter markers. They deposited their loads on the sofa and headed out for more. In about a half an hour, all of Kaoru's belongings were piled on the sofa and easy chair and her folded drafting table and stool were against the wall. Both girls were taking a breather before moving everything in the rear bedroom, which would be hers.

"Whew!" Misao huffed as she surveyed the stacked crates, boxes, luggage and furniture. "I can't believe you fit all of that in the back of your car."

"Yeah," Kaoru agreed. "It wasn't easy but I managed. My father likes things organized and he drilled it into me about efficient use of space."

"So how'd he take you moving out?" Misao asked as she looked into Kaoru's eyes.

Kaoru sighed deeply as she said, "Not well. He was still trying to get me to change my mind as I left and it had me in tears."

She recalled the way her father, already quite into his daily drunk with a jug of sake in his hand pleaded with her to stay and when she refused, he switched to his customary cold indifference, turning away and slamming himself in his room. She could still vividly picture the way his eyes held no warmth like an icy lake in the dead of winter and it sent a chill down her spine, making her feelings of being unwanted intensify. She cursed herself as her sapphire eyes welled up at the memory.

Misao saw her friend trying to hide her desolation and looped an arm about her. "C'mon Kaoru-chan. Let's get you settled and then we'll send out for pizza to celebrate you moving in. My treat."

Kaoru smiled tremulously as she returned the embrace. "Arigatou, Misao-chan."

They both reached for a box and headed through the kitchen to the rear bedroom. Like the typical dorm room, the bedroom was furnished with a full size bed, a dresser and desk. Kaoru and Misao set the boxes they were carrying down while the former took a look at her new inner sanctum.

Misao saw how Kaoru was gradually going through the room and she remarked, "Already planning where you'll put things huh?"

Kaoru scanned the room making mental notes as to how she was going to set up her easel and drafting table and then without a word she headed back out to get another box of belongings. Misao shrugged and followed to assist. In twenty minutes time all of Kaoru's things were moved in and she began the arduous task of unpacking and settling in.

Misao brought in the last of Kaoru's luggage and placing it on the bed, she heaved a sigh of relief. "Whew, that's the last of it!"

Kaoru was setting up her drafting table and she gave her friend a look of gratitude as she walked over to her friend. "Arigatou, Misao-chan. For everything."

Misao grinned and patted Kaoru on the back. "Well, what are friends for?" So are you hungry?"

"Starved."

"So let's order the pizza." She went to the wall phone in the kitchen, by the refrigerator and as she got there to lift the receiver it rang so she answered it while Kaoru continued to diligently labor at settling in. . . .

"Hello? Oh hi, Himura. Aa, I'm here a week early so I can get geared up for classes next week. . . Aa, my vacation was good, how was yours? …. Uh-huh, Okina was okay but he did get a little carried away when a local geisha started to come to the Aoiya to have lunch, he was drooling so much I thought I would have to wipe his mouth, the hentai….Uh-huh…..Nothing much, my friend Kaoru just moved in….We were just going to order pizza….Really, Tomoe gave you the night off?……Same to you, Himura no baka!"

Kaoru was listening without intending to and with a knowing smile, she surmised that Misao was probably talking to one of her many guy friends. Misao was the type of girl that guys were drawn to, her pretty face was one obvious element, but her bubbly enthusiasm was what really attracted the men. Besides that she could guzzle beer and shoot pool with the best of them, she was an unbelievable fighter, and held a black belt in several of the martial arts.

"Hai, see you in a bit…..Bai bai." She hung up and called out to Kaoru, "So what do you want on your pizza?"

Kaoru got up from sorting clothes on the floor and came into the kitchen. "Any kind of veggies but no meat. So who's this guy Himura, a new boyfriend?"

Misao snorted, "Hardly. He's just a good friend. I invited him to come over and bum some pizza off of us. He's a good guy." She dialed the pizza place to make their order. "Mushrooms and olives okay?"

"Uh-huh." Kaoru grunted as she pondered about this friend Himura of Misao's. She tried to picture him, knowing full well the types of guys she was friends with. Most of them were buff wannabe suitors who settled for friendship just to stay in the petite dynamo's life. Kaoru speculated idly about the relationship between Misao and this Himura as her hands completed the task of folding and putting away her clothes. But the suspense was killing her so she rose to her feet to investigate further, going into the kitchen to pump Misao for information. She was still ordering the pizza when Kaoru joined her.

Her curiosity getting the better of her Kaoru waited until she was done and began the third degree. "Okay Misao, so tell me more. You're acting too cool, there has to be something going on so fess up."

Misao reached into the cabinet and brought down three paper plates and three glasses. She replied, "Actually, there's nothing going on. He and I met on campus and went on maybe two dates then decided to be just friends. He's a sweetheart but not my type." She set the kitchen table and added, "Besides, he's in love. He's seeing a girl he just met before the semester ended."

Kaoru said incredulously, "And he's in love already?"

Misao snickered, "Probably the great sex has him in la la land. You know how men are. Anyway, it's all hot and heavy with him and Tomoe and because we're both only children, he comes over here to talk about her with me. It can get to be a drag sometimes."

"Umm," Kaoru nodded noncommittally, not really interested anymore. She changed the subject. "So who's the one that is your type?"

Misao's teal orbs glowed like jewels. "Shinomori Aoshi. He's the bomb!" She gazed dreamily off into the distance.

Kaoru giggled at her friend's love-struck expression. "So he's the new 'magnificent obsession', huh?"

Misao nodded with a soft smile. "He was in my poly sci class last term. He's the most gorgeous male I ever laid my eyes on. Tall and trim and his eyes, oh Kaoru, his eyes are the most beautiful shade of blue green."

"Aqua," Kaoru corrected as she grinned at her gushing friend.

"Whatever. Anyway, he sat next to me in class all semester and the last class before finals, I finally got up the nerve to say hi. I was so nervous and he's the strong and silent type. Anyway, he agreed to have coffee with me after class and he asked me out. We've been seeing each other since."

"Oh? Why didn't you tell me sooner?" Kaoru asked.

Misao sighed and went to get some napkins in the cabinet. She set them with the plates and answered reluctantly, "Because I thought you wouldn't want to hear about it. Especially since you've sworn off men."

Kaoru blushed as she retorted, "I did not swear off men. I just don't want to get all involved and serious with some guy right off the bat. Besides, I want to concentrate on school now that I've moved out of the house." She turned and headed toward the living room and sat in the easy chair, staring out the window and clutching her shoulders, erecting her wall again.

A bit shamed by her statement, Misao followed Kaoru to the living room and plopped down on the beanbag chair beside her. She reached out a hand in a placating manner.

"Gomen, Kaoru-chan. I was thoughtless when I said that, forgive me?"

Kaoru flashed a melancholy smile as she said, "You're forgiven. I just have to get over what happened and move on." Her beautiful sapphire orbs clouded as she remembered the last time a well-meaning friend tried to fix her up.

_**Flashback:**_

_**She had been staying with her good friend Tae and the plan for the semester was to room with her. But then she was at Tae's dorm room for the long weekend just before the semester was to begin and Tae was insistent, begging Kaoru to attend a huge party at one of the wildest frat houses on campus which happened to be the building right next door. She kept saying that it was going to be a great party, and that her boyfriend Okitsugu and his friend was going to the party with her so they could make it a foursome but thanking Tae for including her, she had refused. Kaoru cringed because she knew the buddy visiting from home, Tobei, who had taken an immediate liking to her when she met him and was persistent in his pursuit of her was pushing hard, hoping she would change her mind. But her dislike of the overly aggressive Tobei prompted her to insist that she had some work to do for school, so she had begged off and stayed at the dorm. An hour later as she was busy working on a painting, a loud pounding at the door startled her. When she went to answer it, she was surprised to see an annoyed Tobei standing there, leaning against the jamb so she could not close the door. He pushed his way in and demanded to know why she refused to go to the party with him. She had continued to try to convince him that it was because she was busy but he did not buy it. She tried desperately to get him to leave but he stated that he knew she had no boyfriend so she had no reason not to go with him. His attitude became more arrogant as she continued to refuse.**_

_**The conversation ended with Tobei being quite adamant to the point of taking her by the arm to force her to accompany him and when she wrenched it free he became angry and slapped her. He then tried to tackle her as she eluded him and grabbing a broom that was propped against the wall, she used a move from her kakari-geiko kendo exercises from her father's classes and struck him hard on the shoulders, knocking him face down. Because it was unexpected, she succeeded in stunning Tobei and so terrified she ran out of the dorm room and across the way to where the party was in full swing to try to disappear in the throng. She fled and never looked back, losing her way through the crowd of drunken partygoers.**_

_**Making her way through the crowd Kaoru ran behind the dorm and hid herself by the garbage dumpsters, her heart pounding as her fear at what nearly happened caused her to shiver. She was hoping that Tobei was gone and trying to figure out a way to get back to Tae's when she was further frightened by two people were approaching and so startled she made a noise, causing her hiding place to be revealed. Her heart stopped until she saw that it was a classmate Tsubame and her boyfriend Yahiko who asked her what was wrong. Relieved that she was still safe, she fell apart and told them everything. The couple then took her to Tsubame's dorm to spend the night while Yahiko went back to the dorm room to deal with Tobei. He came back and told Kaoru that the guy was gone so exhausted by her ordeal, Kaoru collapsed. She ended up spending the night.**_

_**The next day, a worried Tae came to Tsubame's and found Kaoru asleep on the sofa so she woke her and asked what happened as Tobei had left Okitsugu's without any word. When she heard what had happened, she apologized in tears for leaving her friend in such danger. But Kaoru decided to move back home the next day and so commuted from home to classes for the rest of the semester.**_

_**End flashback **_

Kaoru shivered involuntarily as the memory brought back the horror of that night and so she vowed to have nothing to do with guys until she finished school. Plus, her father's ongoing bout with alcoholism made it hard to go on dates or pursue a relationship, her shame at the constant drinking being an apt deterrent to any blooming friendship with the opposite sex.

Misao watched the emotions flicker across her friend's delicate features and knew right away that Kaoru was reliving the ordeal at the dorm and was deep in the well of her remembered pain.

"I'm sorry, Kaoru-chan. I know you're thinking about what happened that night."

"Yeah, sometimes I can't help but think about it," Kaoru admitted ruefully as she shook her head.

Misao said softly, "Did you ever report it to campus security? Or the cops?"

She shook her head again. "Iie. He didn't rape me and I got away so what's the point?"

Misao's teal eyes sparked as she said indignantly, "That doesn't matter! He forced himself on you and assaulted you. You should've pressed charges." She was outraged and wanted vengeance for her friend.

Kaoru sighed, "I didn't want all the hassle. He was Tae's boyfriend's friend and I didn't want her to get in the middle. Besides since then the two of them have been so guilty about it that they've completely avoided me."

Misao huffed, "They should be! They guy was a slug and they should be doing everything they can to gain your forgiveness."

Kaoru shrugged and brushed a warm rivulet from her lashes as she replied, "Don't worry about it, Misao-chan. It's water under the bridge. It's my problem and I gotta find a way to deal."

Misao reached over and squeezed her hand in support as the doorbell rang. "That's the pizza." She stood up and reached in her jeans for a bill then went to the door to open it, speaking to the delivery boy in an irritated voice.

"Sheesh, we thought you got lost. What took so long?" she groused but the figure at the door responded in a soft tenor apologetically.

"I got here as fast as I could, Misao-dono but the road from my place was busy with traffic." A short but muscular young man with unruly red hair in a jeans jacket and tan dockers stood there smiling.

Misao's irked expression changed to a warm grin as she embraced the man. "Hi Himura, you're just in time, the pizza's not even here yet." She opened the door and let him in then gesturing at Kaoru performed the introductions.

"Himura, this is my very best friend Kamiya Kaoru. Kaoru, this is my good friend Himura Kenshin."

Kenshin smiled warmly as he bowed and said, "It's a pleasure to meet you."

Kaoru just stared at what she perceived was the most beautiful man she had ever seen. He had a classically sculptured face with even features and shoulder length sunset red hair, which made him especially unusual in Japan. She rose slowly and returned the bow her eyes rising and looking into the most intensely riveting violet eyes that were placid and completely guileless.

"Likewise," she murmured, her heart pounding, much to her chagrin.

Kenshin smiled slowly, admiring the shiny raven tresses that framed the visage of a porcelain doll. The atmosphere between them became electric as Misao observed the silent but apparent sparks flying between them.

She opened her mouth to say something to break the spell when the doorbell rang again, heralding the arrival of the pizza. Misao opened the door, paid the delivery boy, and took the flat boxes over to the kitchen table as she grinned and gestured to her two friends.

"C'mon guys. It's chow time."

"Great, I'm starved," Kenshin said cheerfully as he shucked out of his jacket and tossed it on the sofa. He glanced over and said, "Coming, Kaoru-dono?"

"Huh? Oh yeah, sure." Kaoru lowered her head and followed as Kenshin and Misao both sat down and reached for the boxes. She took the last seat, at Kenshin's right and noticing that he and Misao had both began to get ready to eat, followed suit.

"What kind did you get?" Kenshin asked as he peered in the boxes.

Misao replied, "One mushrooms and olives 'cause Kaoru doesn't eat meat. The other's pepperoni."

Kenshin grinned at Kaoru and said, "Mushroom and olives sounds great."

Kaoru returned the smile shyly.

Oblivious, Misao took a bite from a slice of pepperoni and remarked, her mouth full, "Well, you two knock yourselves out then and I'll just enjoy the pepperoni."

Kaoru giggled as she said, "Go right ahead, Misao-chan." She took a bite out of her own slice and sneaked surreptitious glances at Kenshin through lowered lashes. . . .

After they ate, the trio headed into the living room and Kaoru and Kenshin sat down, she in the blue easy chair and he on the sofa as Misao knelt by the stereo rifling through the CDs. Finding one that she liked, she held the jewel case up for approval.

"How about some Neil Young?" They were all fans of classic rock and Kaoru and Kenshin nodded their approval. She put the disk in and the strains of "Cinnamon Girl" wafted through the speakers. She got up and belly flopped on the beanbag to start conversation and end the uncomfortable silence that had ensued.

"So Himura, how's everything going with your radio show?" Misao inquired as she gazed up at Kenshin who was sprawled on the sofa eyes closed, his legs stretched out and feet propped up on the coffee table.

He yawned and opened his eyes. "Okay I guess. I went down to the station this afternoon to update my play list and check with my advisor before classes start Monday. I also had to meet with the station manager to get my schedule for the next two weeks."

"Hmm. Did ya get anyone to cover for you this weekend when you and Tomoe are going away to ski?"

Kenshin grinned as he answered, "Oh yeah! My buddy Sanosuke said he'd cover for me if I cover for him next week when he and Megumi head out to her place in Aizu."

Misao explained to Kaoru, "Himura is a communications major. He loves talking on the radio but with his looks he could definitely make it on the TV."

Kaoru smiled as Kenshin blushed and said self-depreciatingly, "Misao-dono, you're too much."

Undaunted, Misao plowed on. "And you should see him swing a sword. He's top level champ in kendo here at the university. By the way, Kaoru's dad is the sensei at one of the top dojos here in Tokyo."

"Is that so?" Kenshin said as he again sent his warm gaze in the general direction of the blue easy chair where Kaoru was perched and the girl blushed as she nodded.

"Yeah, my dad's the master of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. He calls it katsujin-ken "the sword that protects."

Bringing his feet down Kenshin leaned toward her, interested. "Tell me more about it."

Kaoru demurred, "It's not that interesting. Basically, it's a series of kiri-kaeshi, waza-geiko, kakari-geiko, and chodan katas that are designed not to kill but to protect. My father is a swordsman of great skill and he designed the style."

Kenshin's intense interest in this new information was displayed in the brilliance of his eyes as his admiration for the lovely Kaoru grew. He said, "My stepfather taught me the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, an ancient sword style that is based on the defense of one against many. It too is designed to protect."

Misao piped up, "Himura learned all his skills from his stepfather, Hiko Seijiro. Like me, he's from Kyoto but from the mountains so we didn't know each other till we met here.

Kenshin nodded, "I lived with Hiko since I was eight. After my folks died, he took me in and he taught me the sword style that was handed down for generations."

Kaoru's beautiful sapphire eyes were soft with sympathy for the redhead's sad childhood and she voiced her concern. "And he takes care of you still."

"Unless Tomoe takes over for him," Misao pointed out with a wink.

Kenshin nodded, strangely warmed by Kaoru's statement as he felt drawn by those ultramarine orbs. Yet at the mention of Tomoe he became bemused as he felt the twinge of guilt at his attraction to Kaoru and he hastened to reply.

"It's still a bit early for that," Kenshin said, rubbing the back of his head blushing. "But I wouldn't mind if she did. I know I'd like to take care of her. I want to protect her happiness."

Kaoru was surprised to feel a pang go through her as she watched Kenshin's eyes become soft as he spoke of Tomoe. She asked quietly, "Is Tomoe your steady girlfriend?"

Kenshin looked at Kaoru and then quickly looked away as he replied, "Yeah."

Misao jumped up announcing, "Okay that's it for me." She gathered up her books and pens and said, "Himura, you can gush about Tomoe all you want to Kaoru. I'm bailing."

He got up with a questioning look as he frowned and asked, "How come?"

Misao headed over to her room and tossed over her shoulder. ""Cause I've heard it all before. Besides, I want to take a serious look at my abnormal psychology textbook. It's my first class on Monday morning and the professor's a real bear. See ya." She went inside and closed the door leaving Kenshin and Kaoru alone in the living room watching her exit.

Kenshin sat back down and threw a somewhat sheepish grin at Kaoru. "I guess I should split too." He rose and reached for his jacket but Kaoru got up and laid a hand on his hand to detain him. For some unexplainable reason at least to her, she did not want him to leave.

"Kenshin, if you want to talk about your girlfriend, I don't mind listening." She flashed him a warm smile as she reiterated, "Really, I don't."

He smiled as he shook his head and said, "I just met you. I don't want to bore you."

She turned and headed in the direction of her bedroom. "You won't. I've got to get my bed made and my clothes in the closet before I can go to bed and would love the company. So c'mon." She walked into the bedroom, leaving the door open.

Kenshin's even features bore a look of puzzlement as he mentally debated the wisdom of talking about the woman with which he believed he was in love with a woman he felt an immediate attraction to but he shrugged and followed Kaoru into her room.

He came in and found her kneeling by the dresser, putting her slacks and jeans away so he perched on the edge of her bed and just watched.

"So," Kaoru said as she continued to fold and store her clothes. "Tell me all about her…"

About three hours later, it was 1:30 AM and Kaoru was walking him to the door. Kenshin donned his jacket and turned to Kaoru to take and squeeze her hand.

"Arigatou Kaoru-dono," he whispered as they entered the darkened living room, which indicated that Misao had already turned in.

She smiled as she squeezed his hand in response. "No problem. Talk to me anytime you need to."

Kenshin's eyes glowed as he saw a face before him that bore no trace of phoniness or put on, a face that was classically beautiful, radiating with the sense of being completely real. He found a part of himself regretting that his heart was promised to another. He sighed and opened the door to exit.

"Well, I'll see you around school then. Oyasuminasai." he said a tad reluctantly as he turned to head down the stairs.

"Oyasuminasai Kenshin," Kaoru said as she watched him land on the walk and stride over to his car. She continued to watch as he got into his blue 1975 Datsun 210 and started the motor, then shifted gears to pull out of the parking lot.

**NEXT…..CHAPTER 1…SKETCH - KENSHIN**


	2. CHAPTER 1 SKETCH KENSHIN

_Author's Note: Here's a bridge chapter that brings us into the viewpoint of Kenshin and the early development of his and Kaoru's friendship. And it's the first introduction of the angst that will draw Kenshin and Kaoru even closer. Unfortunately, as in the original storyline Tomoe had to die but I tried to handle her with sensitivity and dignity, as she deserves. I also imagine that had Kaoru and Tomoe crossed paths, they would be as gracious to each other as I tried to make them. Thanks all readers and reviewers._

**CHAPTER 1…SKETCH...KENSHIN**

And so it began….

Three weeks later, Kenshin was driving over to the apartment, his passenger seat piled with books to study with his close friends Misao and Kaoru. Since that night right before the semester started, when he was not with Tomoe, he found himself at the girls' apartment often to study, talk, or just hang out. Both were similar in temperaments so it was very amusing to be with them, they both had a way of making anything, even studying fun. He especially enjoyed talking kendo with Kaoru as they compared various moves and techniques with each other and he was discovering how easy it was to be with her as they shared strategies for his matches. Her smile had the power to warm the coldest of winter days and her laugh was contagious, often prompting him to laugh along with her. But then were 'those times'. At those times he also saw another common circumstance that they both shared. Both he and Kaoru had rather difficult home lives with fathers who were strict taskmasters so they often commiserated with each other on that point. Yet although they shared freely, Kaoru still had a tendency to pull back and retreat behind what Misao referred to as her 'wall', effectively shutting everyone and everything out. This was the case especially when she would return to the apartment after a weekend with her father.

He pulled into the empty visitor's parking place by D-5 and reaching for his books, exited his vehicle, closing the door with his foot. The apartment door swung open and Misao came bounding out, in a flurry of energy.

"Hi Himura," she said hurriedly as she headed for Kaoru's Celica. "Kaoru's inside, can't talk now, I'm meeting Aoshi at the library. See ya!" She jumped into the vehicle, fired up the engine and took off.

Kenshin shook his head chuckling at the pixie's hasty departure as he climbed the stairs and entered the apartment. The parlor was empty as he called out, "Kaoru-dono?"

The door to her room was closed but as he walked over to knock he could hear her voice muffled as the phone cord had been stretched and she appeared to be talking to someone. Without meaning to he could hear her subdued responses to the caller.

"Hai, otosan. . . . I know I should have made sure that the hall was scrubbed but it was late and I had an early class the next day so I needed to get back. . . . Hai, I know that's no excuse but please forgive me. And I know I should have done the laundry too. . .,"

Kenshin's heart was constricting as he heard Kaoru plead with her errant parent who again was blaming her for his own needs not being met. He was filling with righteous anger toward Kamiya Koshijiro and he had not ever met the man. He stood by the refrigerator, arms folded waiting for her.

A few minutes later, the call concluded and the door opened and Kaoru emerged wiping her eyes as she replaced the phone on its cradle. She looked in surprise as she saw Kenshin there gazing at her in sympathy. She wiped away the remainder of her tears, smiled and gave him a cheery greeting.

"Hi Kenshin. I didn't know you were coming over tonight." Kaoru said as she reached around him in the refrigerator for a Coke and opened the can as he watched. She offered him one but he shook his head.

He said, "Remember, I called you earlier and asked if you wanted to study together tonight. You said yes so I came over." He studied her closely as he asked, "Are you okay?"

She looked at him uncertainly as she replied, "Not really but I'll survive." She walked into the parlor and sitting on the sofa took a swallow of the Coke. He followed, taking a seat on the sofa beside her as he continued staring at her.

"Sorry Kaoru but I don't get it. You can talk to me about anything so why don't you now? It's obvious you're upset." Kenshin's eyes were infused with a warm violet hue as he waited for her to respond.

Kaoru met his gaze as she lowered her head in shame. "I appreciate your concern, Kenshin. But I really would rather not talk about it."

He reached over and took her chin in his hand to raise it so he could meet her eyes. "Kaoru, I'm your friend and it hurts me to see you in pain. I wish you would trust me."

Her sapphire eyes glistened with unshed tears as she said softly, "Oh Kenshin I do trust you. It's just that I can't talk about it; not to you, Misao, or anyone. So please understand."

He nodded as he removed his hand. "Okay. But promise me that when you can talk about it, you'll come to me."

Kaoru nodded in gratitude. "I promise." She flashed him a brilliant genuine smile, the same one that was like a ray of summer sun and warmed his very soul. She gestured to their books on the coffee table. "Should we get to work now?"

Kenshin nodded and he complied with her wishes as he mused about the real home difficulties that were part of her life that she was keeping under wraps. Of late, as they had gradually grown closer, Kaoru had shared with him about a difficult home life but she gave no details so he was at a loss. But as he secretly watched her erect her wall again, he vowed that one day he would find a way to scale it and make her smile commonplace.

So began a friendship that was based on mutual interests and troubles, putting both Kenshin and Kaoru on common ground, a basis for something strong to grow. And it did. . . .

ONE MONTH LATER:

The campus radio station was located at the rear of the main building by the arts building, a red brick structure with a tall transmitter antenna towering over the parking lot that ensured the broadcast reached a twenty-five mile radius. Inside the main studio, Himura Kenshin was seated wearing headphones before a microphone and two turntables with a vast soundboard surrounding them along with a wall of record albums, CDs, and cassette tapes. Vintage and current rock posters from area clubs and upcoming concerts festooned the walls without equipment along with a whiteboard and markers with the DJ schedules.

The instrumental finale and Jimmy Page's unparalleled guitar to the long version of Led Zeppelin's "Stairway to Heaven" was echoing in the studio as Kenshin sat, eyes closed as he lost himself in the music. He was transfixed as the driving drums of John Bonham brought the song to the final crescendo and the last haunting vocals:

"_And she's buy—ing a stairrrway…..to heavennnn.."_

Kenshin snapped out of his trance and grabbed the mike as the song ended. "And that wraps up our Thursday night Rock Block featuring the classic sounds of Led Zeppelin. And in case you just got on board, you're here with your own rurouni Kenshin til the 10 PM hour, that you are. So stick around while we pay some bills and then we'll start you off on another 45 minute block of commercial free classic rock." He slipped a tape into the deck and a commercial for a local record store played and so Kenshin gathered up several records to prepare for his next music block.

Over at the glass window to the hall, a petite beauty with deep coffee eyes and ebony tresses tied loosely back knocked on the glass to get Kenshin's attention. When he spotted her, a wide grin stretched on his face and he got to his feet to go to the door and let her in.

"Hey, koibito." He kissed her and pulled a chair to the soundboard as he again took a seat to speak into the mike as the station jingle finished. "Okay, everyone Kenshin back and like I promised, 45 solid minutes of rock 'n roll starting off with some Moody Blues." The intro to "Tuesday Afternoon" began playing as Kenshin leaned closer to his girlfriend, Yukishiro Tomoe. He wrapped his arm about her and drew her closer.

She responded by meeting his lips as they sought her own petal pink ones in a slow kiss that lit a fire in Kenshin's loins as he temporarily lost himself. After several minutes of passion. Tomoe gently drew back as she coyly reminded him.

"We'd better cool it down a bit. We aren't alone you know."

He grinned lazily as he ran his hand down her cheek. "Relax, hime. There's nobody else here and Sano won't be here for another hour." He leaned in again. "And this is radio, nobody can see us."

Giggling, Tomoe moved back. "Easy, boyo. We'll have plenty of time when you get off the air. What are we gonna do?"

Kenshin shrugged as he took the hint. "What do you want to do?"

Tomoe replied, "All through my current affairs class I was dying for a mushroom and olive pizza. How's that sound?"

At those words Kenshin's mind was filled with a vision of sapphire blue eyes and a sweet visage smiling as she nibbled on mushroom and olive pizza. He smiled at the memory as Tomoe waved her hand in front of him to get his attention.

"Kenshin?"

He shook his head to clear it. "Huh?"

She peered at him as she asked, "You okay?"

He smiled at her squeezed her hand and assured, "I'm fine, aka-chan. Don't worry your pretty head about me." He changed the subject.

"So how was Katsura-sama's class tonight?"

Tomoe shrugged as she replied, "Okay. You didn't miss much but he's assigning a paper that'll be due just before midterms."

"I figured as much," Kenshin muttered as he reached for another record and placed it on the other turntable to have it play as the last song ended. The song "So Long Ago So Clear" by Vangelis began to play as he went on, "I know he's giving me a break about being at Thursday night classes when I have to be on the air but he told me that I'd still be responsible for getting the work done."

"I know," Tomoe said with a sigh. She then flashed a dazzling smile as she held up her notebook. "That's why I have the notes here for you to copy."

His amethyst eyes glowed at her as he said in gratitude, "You're the best, koibito." He leaned in for another kiss as he added, "What did I do to deserve you?"

She replied saucily, "You must live right," as she met his lips with hers. . .

Later Kenshin and Tomoe pulled into the crowded parking lot at **_Guido's_**, a popular combination pizza place and social club, where local bands played on weekends making it a drawing for the university students. Tomoe glanced about as Kenshin killed the lights and shut of the engine.

"The place is really hopping tonight," she said a tad disappointed.

Kenshin turned to her with a quizzical look. "You don't want to go in here?"

She said with a shrug, "I was hoping we could be alone."

"But you told me you were hungry for a mushroom and olive pizza. **_Guido's _**is the best place around and I haven't eaten since lunch and I'm starving." He squeezed he hand. "C'mon, we can eat and maybe hang around and listen to tonight's band."

Tomoe sighed as she protested, "Couldn't we just go back to your place and order take out?"

Kenshin gazed at her and asked, "What's wrong, Tomoe? Why don't you want to go here?"

She felt pinned by his gently questioning eyes as she sighed in resignation. "Nothing's wrong. I just wanted to be alone with you."

Kenshin smiled as he saw the need in her for closeness, something that made him fall in love with her to begin with as she awoke a strong urge to protect in himself. He leaned over and kissed her and then said softly, "Let's just go in and grab a bite then we'll go back to my place. Sano's doing the graveyard shift at the radio station so he won't be home, we'll have the whole place to ourselves, okay?"

Tomoe nodded as his amethyst orbs captivated her. "Okay."

Inside, **_Guido's_** was a piece of Italy smack in the middle of Tokyo, lavishly decorated with travel posters from Naples, Rome, Salerno, Milan, and Tuscany with lattice work partitions at each booth and climbing ivy. The tables were covered in red and white checkered tablecloths and each had a basket of breadsticks and a candle in a wine bottle. The rear of the restaurant opened up into a dance floor and small stage lit with multi-color spotlights and a band was playing a driving rock tune to a crowd of kids from the university, some of whom were dancing.

Kenshin and Tomoe spotted a vacant booth near a colorful travel poster that had the tower of Pisa featured and so squeezed through the crowd to claim it. They settled in as Kenshin shouted over the din.

"You wait here and I'll go get the pizza!"

Tomoe nodded as she yelled, "Okay!" She watched as he melted into the crowd, heading for the counter to give their order.

Once there, Kenshin gave his order to the cashier and paid for it. He sat at the counter waiting for his pie as someone tapped him on the shoulder, startling him. He whirled around and was face to face with the smiling gamin visage of Misao who gave him a hug in greeting. He smiled in pleasure as he noticed she was not alone, the shapely figure of Kaoru was next to her.

"Hey, Himura! What's up?" she cried as the amplifiers of the band boomed and echoed off of the walls.

He grinned widely at his friend and answered, "Nothing much. My shift at the station just ended so me and Tomoe came here for something to eat. You two here for the same?"

Misao nodded as she replied, "Uh-huh. We both wanted to get away from studying and decided to drop in." She gestured to Kaoru who looked a bit flustered by the crowd and noise. "And Kaoru here needed a break, she's been burying herself in her class work since classes started."

Kaoru protested, "Misao, stop exaggerating. I am here to study and work, I have a lot of classes and I want to do well in all of them. What's the use of going to classes otherwise?"

Misao stated, "Yeah well all work and no play." She left it off and eyed her friend meaningfully.

Kenshin stared at Kaoru without meaning to as he asked, "So how have you been, Kaoru-dono?"

She was lovely as usual clad in a navy turtleneck sweater and her hair tied back with an indigo ribbon that brought out the deep sapphire of her eyes, and he was mesmerized. Lately, he had been curtailing his visits to the apartment because in the last couple of times he hung out with Kaoru he had been successful at scaling her wall and they were spending a lot of time confiding in each other, feeling more and more at ease. He realized he was starting to feel things he knew he should not, being in a serious relationship with Tomoe so he decided to avoid seeing Kaoru entirely. But at the way he felt his heart pounding at just seeing her now, he knew deep down he had missed her.

"I'm sorry I haven't called or been around," Kenshin said guiltily, feeling he had to explain his absence.

Letting him off the hook she smiled her brilliant smile as she replied, "That's okay. I've been really busy with work for school, especially my photography and portrait painting classes."

"Oh I see," he said as the clerk brought his pizza. He picked up the box and said brightly, "Hey why don't you two come over and share this with Tomoe and me?" He flashed a smile at Kaoru and added "It's mushroom and olive."

Kaoru opened her mouth to decline but Misao piped up, "Great, we'd love to. If Tomoe doesn't mind."

"Oh I'm sure she won't," Kenshin assured the girls as they followed his lead to the booth where his girlfriend waited. Tomoe's eyes showed gladness first at seeing him and then slight dismay to see he was not alone.

He placed the box on the table and slipped in beside Tomoe as she said, "I wondered what was taking you so long."

"Sorry to worry you aka-chan, but I had to wait for the pizza and I met Misao-dono and Kaoru-dono there at the counter so I invited them to join us. Is it okay?"

Tomoe sighed inwardly but smiled at the two females as she said, "Of course it is. It's good to see you, Misao-san."

"Hi Tomoe-san. I hope you don't mind if me and my friend Kaoru join you," Misao said as they both slid into the opposite bench. Misao conducted the introduction, "This is my best friend, Kamiya Kaoru."

Tomoe smiled a polite greeting bowing her head. "How do you do, Kaoru-san? It's nice to finally meet you after hearing so much about you." She glanced at Kenshin who cleared his throat but said nothing.

Bowing, Kaoru returned the greeting as she said, "It's nice to meet you, too Tomoe-san. And I've heard many nice things about you. Please forgive us for intruding."

"It's fine." Tomoe smiled graciously and Kenshin's eyes sparkled at her. "I know it's you two keeping my Kenshin occupied when I can't so I'm grateful. I know he spends a lot of time at your place, I hope it's not too much."

Kaoru smiled and said, "It's okay. He's really not tough to take."

Kenshin blushed a bit as he watched the girls' reaction to each other.

Oblivious to the subtle tension between the three, Misao nodded as she opened the box and announced, "Well come on let's dig in. Hey look Kaoru, it's your favorite."

"Really?" Tomoe said. "Mine too."

There was a moment of silence as the two women acknowledged their similarities. Both were alike in appearance with delicate features and both seemed to have a sweetness that radiated from within. Kenshin watched both with a twinge of trepidation as he had mentioned each girl with the other and although this was the first time they actually met, thanks to him they were well aware of each other. Then they both exchanged glances and giggled as the ice had broken and everyone reached in the box.

As the pizza was consumed, conversation between the foursome flowed and everyone was having a good time with Misao as usual the life of the party, cracking jokes and sending everyone into stitches. The group's laughter was contagious as a tall, austere figure observed from across the way and then made his way through the throng to the booth.

Shinomori Aoshi's taciturn baritone cut through the glee as he said with a slight twinkle in his eye, "Forget the band, sounds like all the fun's here."

Kenshin grinned as he said, "Join us, Aoshi." He threw a wink at Misao. "Right, Misao?" He gestured to Aoshi and the latter took a vacant chair and straddled it sitting next to Misao.

The gamin girl gaped at Aoshi with teal eyes wide and glistening as she stammered, "I-I had no idea you'd be here."

Aoshi said, "You told me you'd be home tonight so I called you but got no answer so I stopped in here."

"Oh, well Kaoru and I decided to get out for a while. We were getting burned out studying, right Kaoru?" She turned to her friend who appeared frozen in place staring across the room as if she had seen a ghost. Alarmed she shook her, "Kaoru, what's wrong?"

Kenshin frowned as he became concerned by the sheer terror he saw in her sapphire orbs. "Kaoru?" he inquired as he cast his eyes over in the direction her eyes were glued. Curious, Tomoe also looked across.

Over at the door a medium sized but powerfully built man with a definite sleazy air about him was scanning the crowd as if he was looking for something….or someone.

Still transfixed Kaoru said softly, "Tobei."

Misao shook Kaoru again as she asked, "That's the guy?"

She nodded woodenly.

"What the hell's going on and who's that guy?" Kenshin demanded his temper rising.

Before she could answer, Tobei had spotted Kaoru and pushed his way through the crowd and came to the booth. With a malicious smile he called to her.

"Well, well look who's here. The little bird that flew the coop." He smiled nastily as he continued, "That was quite a bump you laid on me, Kaoru. I had quite a headache the next day."

Kaoru paled as she retorted, "I gave as good as I got, Tobei. You had a hell of a nerve that night, forcing yourself into the dorm and forcing yourself on me when I told you I wasn't interested in going out with you."

Tobei snickered as he said acidly, "I just figured I'd give you a break. Tae had told me you didn't have a boyfriend."

Kaoru sniffed, "As if I needed or wanted your help. Maybe I just don't want to be bothered with a boyfriend."

"Oh I see now," Tobei said with understanding. "Funny I didn't peg you as _that_ type."

His insinuation was clear as Kaoru gasped and both Kenshin and Aoshi jumped to her defense their faces showing anger. At those words Kenshin's eyes narrowed and became gold tinted as he rose and ordered flatly, "You're bothering the lady, friend. I'm asking you to leave." He stood with his fists balled.

Tobei cast a foolishly disparaging eye at the glowering diminutive man and laughed as he said scornfully, "Yeah right. You wanna make me, shrimp?"

At that moment Aoshi joined the mix as he rose to his full 6'2" height and said in a dangerous tone, "My friend asked you to leave and now I'm telling you. Leave now or suffer the consequences."

Tobei blanched at the two hostile and able men and realizing he was outnumbered decided to beat a hasty retreat. But he threw a parting shot over his shoulder. "Remember Kaoru, I owe you big time and I'll pay back." He then took off, pushing through the crowd and exiting.

Everyone gazed at Kaoru in concern as Misao laid a hand on her shoulder. "Are you okay. Kaoru-chan?" The group all looked at her waiting for her response.

Kaoru's expression was still pale as she gave them all a shaky smile. "I-I'm okay, minna." She rose and was grabbing he jacket and purse. "But I think I'd better split and go home, I don't feel too good."

She slid out as Misao and Aoshi moved to let her through but Kenshin rose as well and asked her, "Do you want me to walk you to your car?"

"We both will," Aoshi insisted but Kaoru shook her raven ponytail.

"No thanks, I don't want to break up the party. I'll be fine. Aoshi, can you give Misao a ride home?" Kaoru asked as she quickly donned her jacket. At his nod she waved and said, "Great, bye minna," then she vanished in the crowd and left.

Kenshin's violet eyes were trained on where Kaoru had jettisoned as he slowly sat down by Tomoe again. In a strange voice he asked Misao, "What exactly happened to her, Misao?"

Misao bit her lip, not knowing if she should tell Kenshin about the incident without Kaoru's permission. Even though they had become close friends, she knew her friend was very private about her life and had not even told her all the details about that night last semester so she answered shortly, "That creep assaulted Kaoru one night last semester."

"How'd it happen?"

Misao sighed as she said, "The guy met and immediately liked Kaoru and when she refused to go out with him, he forced himself on her by breaking into the dorm where she was staying."

"You mean he raped her?" Kenshin snapped in stunned fury.

"Not quite. He attacked her and she let him have it with an attack from the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu then got away."

Tomoe asked, "What's that?"

"Her father's sword style. She got hold of a broomstick and gave it to him."

"Good for her," Aoshi said.

Kenshin uttered a curse as he snarled, "That bastard. How dare he come over here to threaten her!" His eyes had a gold sheen over them as they narrowed to a death glare.

Tomoe noticed the fierce countenance of her usually serene boyfriend and began to wonder what he was thinking. She knew all about his and Kaoru's budding friendship and she did not feel threatened, secure in Kenshin's declared love for her but she saw that by nature of his fury at what had happened to Kaoru, he did care deeply for her as well. It set her to thinking. . . .

Later that night after making love, Kenshin left the sleeping Tomoe and sat at the window, brooding as he watched clouds skitter over the face of the moon. Sleep had eluded him as he thought of the frightened eyes that were the color of the moonlit sky and the scum that put the fear there as his rage rose again.

_If I EVER see that son of a bitch again, I'll kill him _Kenshin vowed silently as he fisted his hands once more. _Payback won't come because I'll never let him near her._

He got up and climbed back into bed.

………………………………………………….

A week later, Kenshin was meeting Tomoe in the College Union for lunch after her morning at the newspaper office. As a journalism major, she had to complete an internship at a local media outlet and she had chosen the newspaper. Her job there was as a cub reporter, working together with some of the veteran writers and her name had been in some of the by-lines of stories published. Kenshin was immensely proud of her accomplishments.

He sighed as he glanced at his watch and noticed time for a leisurely lunch with his girlfriend was quickly slipping away before his next class. He glanced out the window at the dark, scudding clouds and the sheets of rain pouring down, ascertaining that the weather may have something to do with her delay. He was about to give up when he saw Tomoe scurry in to the CU, pushing past the departing lunch crowd to Kenshin's table. She shucked off her raincoat and took a seat across from him.

Kenshin greeted her with a kiss as she began, "I'm so sorry I'm late but the roads are getting flooded with all the rain and snowmelt and I had to take it easy in your car. When are you going to get the brakes fixed? They're really grinding."

Kenshin replied, "Hiko's sent me my expense check. It should be in the mail any day now so as soon as I get it I'll get them fixed. So what took you so long today, usually you're the one waiting for me."

Tomoe answered with a gleam in her coffee eyes, "Wait till you hear, you're going to flip out. The editor wants me to cover the international conference in Kobe!" She giggled in excitement as Kenshin's face broke into a pleased grin.

"Oh, aka-chan that's great, really really great!" he said overjoyed for her. He reached across and gave her another kiss as he said, "I'm so proud of you."

Tomoe grinned ear to ear as she gushed, "That's why I was late. The editor wanted to give me some background for reference and the directions so I need to borrow the car again. I have to be at the conference for opening remarks before seven tonight."

Kenshin shook his head. "Sorry, koibito I can't let you take the car that far. Not with the brakes as they are." The sky split with a bolt of lightning and he added, "And in this kind of weather."

Her face fell as she pleaded with him. "But Kenshin, I need the car to get to Kobe for this."

"Take the train."

Tomoe frowned as she chided, "You know I can't do that, I have to have a vehicle so I can get there early and leave early so I can go to the office and write the story." She gave him a sweetly beseeching look. "Onegai, Kenshin?"

He sighed as her eyes drew him in and he nearly relented. But an idea hit him so he brightened up and said, "No but I have no classes, no kendo practice and I don't have to work at the radio station so I'll take you out there and stick around to drive you back."

She gazed at him in loving gratitude. "Are you sure?"

Kenshin smiled back at her. "Of course, aka-chan. I'll do anything in my power to help you, you know that. And with the brakes acting up I'll feel better knowing I'm the one driving in case something happens." He glanced at his watch and jumped up, grabbing his books. "I have to split to class so I'll pick you up at six."

Neither one knew at the time but Kenshin's words were going to be eerily prophetic. . . .

At six promptly, Kenshin arrived at Tomoe's dorm to pick her up. She ran through the deluge and she opened the door to the Datsun and climbed in. She reached over and kissed him, thanking him for his offer.

Arigatou, anata. I really appreciate this." Tomoe belted herself in as Kenshin pulled out into traffic. She observed the downpour as she commented, "Boy, what a rainstorm."

"Yeah," Kenshin said as he crept along toward the main highway to Kobe. They continued along with little conversation as he was focused on driving in the adverse conditions.

The traffic was quite heavy and the line of cars was maintaining a snail's pace so getting disgusted, Kenshin decided to exit the highway and try a different, less traveled route. So as the rain fell, the Datsun bounced along, and they were finally making good time. And because they were, both hearts were lighter as Kenshin and Tomoe chatted animatedly.

Kenshin was chuckling at something Tomoe had said that was particularly funny when a sharp curve at the end of a steep hill came up. His smile fading, he applied the brakes but to his horror he found they were gone. He pumped the pedal franticly as he struggled to maintain control and the car headed for the road's edge.

Frightened, his girlfriend cried, "Kenshin, what's wrong?"

"The brakes are completely gone! We're going to crash!"

"OH no!" she screamed as the car was careening off some rocks and headed down an incline through some trees to a ravine.

"Ohhh!" he expostulated as he wrestled with the steering wheel and he directed Tomoe, "Hang on!"

The car flew over a flat rocky bank and landed with a thud as it rolled rapidly down the rain-soaked grass. The momentum of gravity caused the car to act as if on a sheet of ice and it hit a tree stump causing it to roll over in mid air and capsize, finally landing on its roof in a field of rushes near a rapid river. The jarring impact caused the driver's side door to open, throwing Kenshin free as he landed in a group of bushes. Twirling like a top, the overturned car came to a stop.

Kenshin got up groggily as he tried to get his bearings, wincing at the pain in his back and legs. He brushed his hand across his left cheek and noticed it was bleeding his fingers finding two separate scratches from the bushes, causing a gouge in the shape of a cross. He was glancing about at the rainy surroundings and then realizing what had happened, he looked for his car and then he spotted it.

"Oh no! TOMOE!" he screamed as he forgot about his own aches and sprinted over to his car, his only thought Tomoe. He reached the passenger's door that was jammed and using all his strength he tried to open the door but to no avail, it would not budge.

The crash had caught the attention of passing motorists, some who came down to offer their assistance. Two burly men lent their muscle to help in opening the door.

"Someone in there, kid?" one asked Kenshin.

He nodded as he continued straining to open the jammed portal. "My girlfriend's stuck in there. Onegai, we gotta get her out!"

"We'll do what we can." Both men flanked Kenshin and pulled along with him.

All of a sudden the sickeningly pungent odor of gasoline permeated the rainy air, and as the three men worked feverishly to rescue Tomoe, a spark from the severed electrical system of the wreck ignited, causing a flame to begin.

One of the men spotted it and yelled in panic, "There's a fire starting! This thing's gonna blow, we gotta go!" He yanked at Kenshin who was oblivious, and continued pulling at the crushed door.

"No! I gotta save her! Tomoe! Tomoe, I'm coming! Can you hear me?" he cried, tears pooling in his eyes. Both men hooked his arms and forcibly dragged him away as he screamed and struggled.

Almost as soon as the men pulled Kenshin clear, the wreck exploded into a leaping conflagration, sending huge palls of black smoke into the gray skies. Kenshin's gold tinted violet orbs watched in disbelief as if in a dream as he sat on his knees watching the horrific tableau. Like a wounded animal, he then raised his head and let out a mournful feral cry.

"TOMOE!"

The faint but strident wail of a siren pierced the air. An ambulance screeched to a stop and emergency personnel jumped out and came bounding down to the accident site. They approached the two men who had assisted Kenshin.

A tech asked, "Is there any one hurt?"

One of the men gestured to Kenshin and said, "He's the owner of the car. But he said his girlfriend's still in there."

The EMTs looked over at the fireball that once was a Datsun 210 and shook their heads in pity.

"I'm afraid we can't help her but we can get him to a hospital." They approached the desolate young man and noticing his bloody appearance hoisted him to his feet, to take him to the waiting conveyance. But he resisted, looking back at the burning wreck.

"No I can't leave her!" Kenshin said sobbing.

One of the EMTs said gently, "There's nothing we can do for her, kid. Come on, you're hurt and you need attention but he shook his titian head blankly.

"Forgive me, Tomoe. Tomoe!" he cried as they led him away from the flaming hulk that was Tomoe's grave. . . .

AFTER MIDNIGHT. . . .

At the hospital back in Tokyo, Kenshin was in an examination room in the emergency room being treated for his wounds and he sat there numb not really there as he was in shock over the events. He still could not believe what had happened and that his love, Tomoe was dead. He sat on the examining table as the doctor treated and wrapped his chest as he had several bruised ribs and as the doctor finished, he took a swab to clean the cuts on his cheek and prepare them for stitching.

Kenshin viciously slapped the doctor's hand away and said in a flat tone. "Leave me alone."

The doctor, a polished man with a look of cool professionalism protested, "But if I don't treat them they'll scar. You need stitches."

"I don't give a damn. Leave them alone." Kenshin skewered the doctor with an amber glare as he reached for his clothes and asked, "Are we finished?"

The doctor scowled as he nodded, whirling to yank his gloves off. He was not about to help anyone that did not want it.

As he donned his shirt Kenshin asked bluntly. "Is there a pay phone here?"

The doctor tossed his head. "Out in the waiting room."

Kenshin bowed curtly as he said, "Arigatou." He left the examining room as the doctor shook his head.

Once in the waiting room, Kenshin made his way to the phone. He reached in his pocket for some change and then dropped it in the slot to make his call. The phone rang three times before a sleepy soprano answered.

"Hello?" Kaoru asked yawning.

At the sound of her voice the tears and anguish Kenshin had held back since the EMTs took him away from his burning wreck finally broke as he sobbed like a little boy.

"K-Kaoru….,"

Amazed she answered, "K-Kenshin? Is that you?"

He replied tearfully, "I-I need you…"

"Where are you?"

"At the Memorial Hospital."

She gasped, "The hospital? What happened, are you all right?"

He said in another sob, "Just come here to the ER. Onegai?"

"I'll be right there."

He hung up the phone and buried his head in his hands as he said over and over in a litany of sorrow,

"Tomoe!"

**NEXT…..CHAPTER 2….SKETCH...KAORU**


	3. CHAPTER 2 SKETCH KAORU

_Author's Note: Here's where we see the beginning of the angst that will draw Kenshin and Kaoru together. Walking through grief is very difficult and sometimes takes us somewhere we'd never choose to go and so in his pain Kenshin's reaching out. So Kaoru is feeling the pressure of wanting to be there for him, yet not knowing if she has the right. And Sanosuke has picked up on the feelings there and will confront Kenshin in the next chapter. To Cuz I Can: I know I'm "cheating" on "A Bright Future" but I'm waiting for my RK Swordsmans' Guide to come so I can write a detailed, authentic fight scene between Kenshin and Izumo so please forgive me and be patient---I promise it'll be worth the wait. Thank you readers and reviewers. _

**CHAPTER 2….SKETCH---KAORU**

The next day after the rainstorm was sunny and bright, the world going on as it always does after abject tragedies take place that shatter those whose lives were irrevocably changed by the horrific events in question. As usual, the studio classrooms in the fine arts building on the south side were filled that afternoon as classes in still life, drawing, and portrait painting took place. In that class, Kaoru sat perched on a tool in the center of the surrounding easels as her classmates were busy capturing her for the class assignment that day. She was exhausted both physically and emotionally so when the instructor had asked for a volunteer, she readily stepped forth, her own mind still numb. Work was the last thing on her mind as the rest of class went on as if nothing had happened last night.

She sat there ramrod stiff below a skylight that was sending afternoon rays to envelop her in warmth that she hardly acknowledged for she felt a chill from inside that permeated her being as the memory of the previous night stood in stark clarity in her mind. The entire scenario replayed over and over as she suppressed the shivers and returned to the events of last night:

**_Upon receiving the call of distress from Kenshin, all thoughts of sleep fled as Kaoru hurriedly dressed and rushed out to her car to drive to the Memorial Hospital. She drove as fast as she safely could on the rain-slickened streets and after parking, ran into the waiting room at the emergency room, glancing frantically about as her eyes sought out the bereft redheaded figure of a man, doubled over with his face buried in his crossed arms. Her heart breaking for him, Kaoru stepped lightly over with catlike grace and soundlessly took a seat beside Kenshin. _**

_**"K-Kenshin?" she asked softly, uncertainly.**_

_**As if on cue, he lifted his head and gazed at Kaoru, his violet orbs tear filled and wracked with pain, his complexion wan and making the cross shaped cuts on his face stand out all the more. Horrified by his marred appearance, she reached for him but he flinched and turned away as if in shame.**_

_**"Don't," his tenor said in a low broken voice. "Don't touch me."**_

_**"B-but Kenshin, your face," Kaoru said in disbelief as she stared at the angry red gouges, creating a cross that covered his left cheek.**_

_**"It doesn't matter. Nothing does."**_

_**His voice was devoid of all hope as if he had been eyewitness to every tableau of misery in the history of mankind and had been made numbed by the pain of it all. Kaoru felt a chill skitter through her, icy fingers of dread that made her tense up and wait for his explanation.**_

_**"Tomoe is dead. She died tonight and I killed her," Kenshin declared tonelessly as he stared blankly ahead at nothing.**_

_**Kaoru gasped as she tried to rationally comprehend his words, believing with her whole heart that she was dreaming it and she would shake herself to find she had dozed off at her drafting table, working. But as she blinked her midnight orbs, she saw the antiseptic reality of the hospital and knew she had heard right.**_

_**"N-no Kenshin, that can't be!" she insisted vehemently, shaking her ebony ponytail. "You could never, ever hurt anyone, especially Tomoe."**_

_**He shook his head slightly as he stated in the same dead tone, "The fact remains, I killed her. She's gone and it's my fault." He rose to his feet and headed to the window to stare out at the flood lighted parking lot, the huge lights reflecting in the puddles created by the day's deluge.**_

_**Kaoru rose as well and went over to join him, her heart constricting as Kenshin stood silent, his eyes vacant and haunted by an ordeal that had shaken him to his very core. She reached with gentle sympathetic hands on his shoulders.**_

_**"What happened?" she asked softly, not expecting him to respond. But he did.**_

_**"There was a crash. I was driving my car and the breaks failed and I---we," Kenshin faltered but Kaoru took charge as she took hold of him and guided him to an easy chair where he automatically sat down and continued.**_

_**"She had to go out to Kobe to cover the International Conference. But I knew the brakes were not good on my car so when she asked to use it, I said no. But she was determined to make her assignment and so I offered to drive her there and take her back. We had decided to beat the traffic by taking a less crowded route especially in the rain."**_

_**Kaoru waited as Kenshin took a deep breath to continue the story. "We were driving along and got to a steep hill so I applied the brakes and nothing happened. We went off the road and down an embankment that had some large rocks and the car overturned, throwing me free and I fell into a patch of sharp thorny bushes."**_

_**Kaoru asked, "Is that where you got the cuts on your cheek?"**_

_**He nodded woodenly as he continued his tale. "The car landed hard against a rock on its roof and Tomoe was trapped inside. As soon as I managed to get up and saw the car I rushed over to try to get her out." He blinked back some tears as he went on brokenly. "B-but I tried and tried and I-I just couldn't open the damned door and the car caught fire a-and she—she--," he said with a sob as he dropped his head in his hands and began to weep again. **_

_**Kaoru took a deep breath as the weight of his words fell full upon her. Tears welled up in her eyes and flowed past her lashes as she joined him in his anguish. Nevertheless, she felt compelled to push him from his inertia and ease the burden on his thin shoulders by getting him away to give him a modicum of peace so she got up, pulling at his arm. "Come on Kenshin. Let me drive you home, you need to get some rest."**_

_**He raised his head dazedly as he replied, "I'm not tired. I want to stay so I can be here when they bring her in."**_

_**As he spoke his request, the double doors opened and a stretcher was wheeled in bearing a dark blue bag with a tag. The EMTs went to the desk and asked the nurse on duty, "Where can we bring the remains of this body pending notification of next of kin?"**_

_**"The morgue's in the basement," the nurse stated matter-of factly. "What's this from?"**_

_**"Car accident just out of city limits," one fellow answered as his partner filled out the necessary forms. "The car jumped the embankment at a curve and overturned. The driver, a young guy with red hair was thrown free but the wreck blew before anyone could get the girl out, poor thing. The firemen put the blaze out and there she was, barbecued."**_

_**The nurse opened the bag and as she viewed the remains made a snort as she said with an arched brow, "A little too well done if you ask me." The other EMT snickered at the quip as over in the corner, Kenshin's eyes narrowed to amber slits. Kaoru was shocked to see the transformation as he rose to his feet and strode purposefully over to the trio.**_

_**"You all have a hell of a nerve talking like that about someone!" he snapped as Kaoru saw the potential for danger and hurried over to his side just in case to quell a possible battle.**_

_**One of the EMTs turned to the irate youth and said in irritation, "Look, junior we didn't mean anything by it. Besides it's really none of your business."**_

_**Kenshin whirled and skewered the man with his now gold eyes, fury pulsating from them like a living thing. Although he was a head taller, the man blanched at the fierceness in the agonized young man and he took a step back.**_

_**At the commotion the other EMT that had been filling out the documents immediately recognized Kenshin and grasped his partner's arm saying urgently, "Check yourself, that's the other victim in the wreck, man."**_

_**The demeanors of the three suddenly changed as they all had the grace to look shamefaced. The nurse said in an apologetic tone, "Forgive our rudeness, sir. It's just how we cope when faced with this kind of tragedy day in and day out. Otherwise we'd go out of our minds."**_

_**The kinder EMT approached Kenshin and said quietly, "The firemen managed to retrieve your girlfriend's remains. If you would identify the body, we can notify her next of kin."**_

_**Kenshin closed his eyes tight, swallowed hard then nodded and went to the stretcher. The EMT opened the bag and pulled the canvas back, revealing a charred face, almost beyond recognition. But Kenshin spotted the one factor that told him this indeed was his beloved. **_

_**She was wearing bright silver earrings, hoops he had given her to celebrate their first month together and seeing those in stark contrast against the darkly burned face that 24 hours ago had been alight with joy at her accomplishment was the final straw. Kenshin backed away, looking sick as he viewed Tomoe's charred flesh so he suppressed a gag and turned abruptly away to compose himself, his shoulders heaving. **_

_**Observing all this, Kaoru stood by feeling completely helpless as she tried to maintain her own composure, wanting to go to him to offer comfort. Yet something held her back knowing that to keep her distance now was best as he appeared to be drawing within himself, retreating to an inner void where there was no reality or pain. **_

_**The EMTs and the nurse all exchanged glances as they knew the look of rapt desolation that was all too familiar to them as health care professionals that dealt with death on a daily basis. However, they had a job to do so the nurse cleared her throat delicately and spoke.**_

_**"Excuse me, sir but can you---,"**_

_**Kenshin whirled about and answered roughly, "Her name's Yukishiro Tomoe. She has no family except for a younger brother and he's just 13 and lives with a relative outside of Kyoto. That's all I know."**_

_**The EMT asked, "She was a student at the university, right?"**_

_**Kenshin nodded as he replied, "Yeah. A journalism major."**_

_**The nurse nodded as she said, "Then the university will have who to call in the event of an emergency. We'll call them tomorrow." She laid a gentle hand on the young man's shoulder. "Why don't you just go home and get some rest, you've been through a horrible ordeal."**_

_**Kaoru agreed as she gently encircled him with her arm. "She's right, Kenshin. Let me take you home now, okay?"**_

_**He gazed at Kaoru's lovely face filled with compassion and nodded as his eyes welled up again. She began to guide him to the door. . . .**_

_**The ride to Kenshin's was silent as Kaoru navigated the wet streets heading to the off campus building where he lived that like her own rented to students. She pulled into a parking place beside a townhouse apartment with a short staircase and turned off the engine.**_

_**The two sat in the car for a few minutes, saying nothing as the events of the evening hung on them like a choking miasma stifling even conversation. After several minutes, Kaoru sighed and broke the silence.**_

_**"Kenshin, I---," she began but he cut her off**_

_**"I don't know how to thank you," his voice was faraway and polite. "Having to go through that, without you there I don't know how I could've handled it. Arigatou."**_

_**She said quietly, "I didn't do anything."**_

_**Kenshin shook his head. "Iie, that's not true. You came when I called you and you really didn't have to. I'm grateful."**_

_**Kaoru stated, "We're friends, Kenshin. Of course I'd come when you need me." **_

_**She reached for his hand and was surprised to find her own in an iron grip as Kenshin pulled her into his arms, clinging to her as if he were drowning. Then he pulled back and before she could think she found his mouth on hers, desperate and insistent as his tongue begged for entry and so swept up she responded. The kiss was slow and passionate, and for the first time the feelings of both were shown openly and without inhibitions. Finally, Kenshin and Kaoru broke apart, both sets of eyes widened by the sheer awe of the act and then an immediate shame and guilt overtook them as both realized the sad circumstances and completely inappropriate behavior.**_

_**Kenshin released her abruptly and opened the car door to exit, with a terse, "Bye."**_

**_Kaoru was filled with a maelstrom of emotions as she watched Kenshin wearily mount the stairs to his apartment, open the door and disappear behind the door with a slam. Sighing deeply, she put a hand to her lips as she still felt the warm softness of his mouth. Her heart pounding, she reached to turn the key in the ignition and started the car, backed out and drove away. . . _**

Kaoru was still deep in her reverie when the time had lapsed and the period was over. The class instructor, Omura-sensei clapped his hands and announced, "All right, minna. That's all for today but before you all depart I'll give you the special project for the semester, which will count for a third of your final grade." He turned to a chalkboard and said over his shoulder to Kaoru, "You may come down, Kamiya-san, the class is over."

"Huh?" Kaoru said, her blank face showing preoccupation as the class tittered. Blushing she slipped off the stool and demurely took a seat at a table where her books and supplies were.

Omura-sensei scribbled on the board as he spoke, "The assignment is a portrait of someone close to you, a family member, a close friend, or significant other. But as a special twist, I want you to tell me through the portrait what color that person represents. Which means, I want you to get into the person's very essence, their soul if possible. As artists, I expect nothing less from you."

In the class all were busy jotting down the assignment Omura-sensei continued, "It can be done in any medium at all but it must be a painting. You can however, take as many photographs of your subject as you want for reference but I want each of your individual styles of painting to show so no copying of one photograph. I want you to capture different emotions of the subject to reflect the color you chose, a compilation that depicts your subject in that color. You may make the painting monochromatic but I prefer the color to express and describe the essence of the subject. Any questions?"

"How large shall we work?" one student piped up.

Omura replied, "No smaller then 11"x14" but no larger than 22"x36". I want the quality of the work to be most important since this will be one third of your grade. Bigger is not necessarily better." He waited for more questions and finding none he dismissed the class.

As the rest of the group was busy cleaning up and gathering their material, Kaoru having not had to paint that session picked up her gear to leave but Omura-sensei stopped her.

"Kamiya-san, may I have a word with you?"

Kaoru glanced at her teacher in curiosity as she nodded and asked, "Hai, sensei?"

The diminutive man with the wire-rimmed glasses peered at her. "Are you all right? You seem a bit tired and preoccupied."

Kaoru stifled a yawn and then stammered, "H-hai sensei, I'm fine. I was just up too late last night."

"I see." Omura bowed and then reached behind to a group of stacked canvases and pulled out her assignment from last week, a montage of sketches of Misao, which showed different views of her perky roommate and aptly captured the bubbly exuberance. He laid the canvas on his desk and asked Kaoru, "Is this young lady a close friend?"

Not knowing the reason for the question Kaoru replied, "Hai, she's my roommate and best friend. Why do you ask?"

Omura stared at the canvas and stated, "Because the way you captured her, I could feel your closeness to her. Her likeness jumps off the canvas and makes me feel as if she were here. Very few professional artists can accomplish this and to see it in one of my students excites me." He took the canvas and put it carefully on a back table. "Because of that, I would like to ask your permission to have this as one of the paintings from my class on display in the administration building. May I?"

Kaoru heart was pounding as her teacher's words astonished her. The painting was just an assignment but she had enjoyed painting Misao and her friend had been thrilled to sit for her. She bowed in humility as she answered softly, "Hai, I would be honored, Omura-sama."

After class, Kaoru went to meet Misao at the CU to pick her up to drive back to the apartment and as she waited, her mind drifted back once more to what had happened with Kenshin last night. She was staring out the window brooding when someone tapped her shoulder.

Expecting Misao Kaoru snapped good-naturedly, "Sheesh, it's about time, itachi! What's the hold up?" She whirled about and was face to face with the lanky figure of one Sagara Sanosuke. Usually easygoing and carefree, she was taken by his solemn visage.

"Hey Jou-chan, ya got a minute?" Jou-chan was a nickname Sanosuke started calling her when he began watching her and Kenshin spar for kendo. Since becoming friends, Kaoru and Kenshin had met several times to perform katas of kakari-geiko for practice and for fun and his buddy Sano often watched. "Mind if I join you?"

Kaoru nodded as he grabbed a chair and straddled it leaning in to talk. "I know it was you that brought Kenshin back to our place last night after the accident."

She lowered her head as she said, "He called me from the hospital. Of course I went right down there."

"Yeah, he told me. Arigatou for doing that."

"How is he?"

Sano frowned, "Not good but he's putting up a great front. After he got Hiko's bread this morning he rented a car and took off for Kyoto to see Enishi, Tomoe's kid brother. He's been staying with an aunt since she went away to school. Tomoe practically raised the kid since their folks died when she was 11."

"Oh!" Kaoru expostulated, concern for the youth filling her. "How hard it must be for him to hear of his sister's death."

Sano nodded as he continued, "Kenshin felt it was his duty to be there for the kid and work with the aunt to make the arrangements for Tomoe's funeral so that's why he took off. So I just thought I'd tell you."

Kaoru sighed and nodded as she said, "Arigatou, Sano. I appreciate you telling me."

Sano grunted and then cleared his throat, appearing uncomfortable as he prepared to say something else. "Jou-chan, there's something else. And feel free to tell me to mind my own damned business but I have a question."

Kaoru took a deep breath and braced herself. "Hai?" she said warily.

He plunged right in. "What happened between you and Kenshin last night?"

She paled and then tittered nervously. "I don't know what you mean."

Sano sighed and said a bit annoyed, "Don't BS me, Jou-chan. I could tell something more was bothering him than just the accident and losing the woman he loved. He had a strange look and just clammed up after he told me about the accident."

She shrugged and said, "Maybe he was just too upset. After all he had been through, you can't blame him."

Sano shook his head, "Uh-uh no sale. We're like brothers and he completely shut me out last night. So I ask you again, what happened between you two?"

Kaoru sighed as she felt pinned by his probing umber orbs boring into her. With lowered lashes she replied, "When I brought him home and was saying good-bye he…kissed me."

"Kissed you?"

She nodded as she raised her eyes met his gaze unwavering. "Yeah, kissed me."

"Ahh, that explains a lot," Sano said knowingly as if he had figured right. He gazed raptly at Kaoru and asked, "And how do you feel about that?"

Kaoru was silent as she suddenly felt under a microscope and a faint blush colored her cheeks as she bit her lip, remembering vividly the feel of Kenshin's kiss and the raw emotion behind it. During the drive back to her place last night, there had been a tug-of-war within as she wavered between delight and appall as her practical mind and her bottled up emotions each vied for dominance. Of late their relationship had been getting a bit too intense and she could sense thatit was taking a dangerous turn so she was actually glad that he had stopped calling and coming over. However, after tossing and turning all night her head won over her heart as common sense told her that he was just seeking comfort and an easing of the agony of his loss, albeit temporarily. Although she still stubbornly clung to the notion that there nothing more than close friendship between them, she knew that the fact that it happened at all had sent her reeling.

Sanosuke lowered his head and said in a quiet tone. "Look, I'm not prying. It's just that I know how close the two of you are and I wondered 'cause he seemed funny. And I know that he's confused."

"Confused about what? We're just friends, Sano." Kaoru insisted her heart pounding. After last night even she had a hard time believing that.

With a dubious look Sano opened his mouth to reply but at that very moment, Misao rushed over, out of breath. "Oye, Kaoru-chan I'm sorry I'm late, I had to meet with the professor after class to ask him about my paper. It's due in two weeks." She took a seat and noticed Sanosuke. "Oh hi there, tori-atama. How's Kenshin doing?"

Sanosuke rose from the chair and glanced at Misao as he replied, "He took off this morning for Kyoto to help Tomoe's family with the arrangements. I gotta split 'cause I'm covering for him at the radio station for the next few days." He gave Kaoru an earnest, searching look as he said in parting to her, "Don't be a stranger, Jou-chan...especially now."

Sano disappeared into the crowd as Misao gazed at Kaoru and demanded, "What did he mean by that?"

Kaoru watched after him and then shaking herself she said crisply, "Nothing. Let's go home." She got up and gathered her gear then strode off with a perplexed Misao in tow calling her name.

…………………………………………………………………..

A few days later in the Campus Hall a memorial budusan was set up with Yukishiro Tomoe's photograph flanked by her favorite flower, white plum blossoms, incense, and candles burning to signify her spirit. A railing with cushions set down before it was for those who wished to pay their respects and pray for her departed soul. At the side with heads bowed knelt Kenshin and a sullen looking young boy with unruly raven hair.

A long line of mourners was gathered as Tomoe had been well known because of her academic accomplishments and prominence in the newspaper office, the latter fact making her somewhat of a celebrity. And everybody knew she was the girlfriend of one of the most popular DJs on campus who was a champion kendoist as well. So many students and faculty had lined up to come and offer their respect. At the middle of the line, both in sedate black dresses stood Kaoru and Misao murmuring quietly among themselves as they waited their turn.

Misao whispered as she glanced about, "Big turnout, huh?"

Kaoru nodded as she replied, "Tomoe was well-respected for her work with the newspaper. I'm not surprised."

Misao pointed out, "There's Himura."

Kaoru's eyes spotted the titian haired young man looking unseemly in a black suit and tie kneeling to the side where families of the deceased usually sat as friends and acquaintances came to honor. His hair tied back he had his head bowed and simply nodded as mourners moved from the budusan to where he and another suit clad youth who appeared to be Tomoe's brother Enishi sat to offer their condolences. Both appeared numbed by their grief and deep inside she longed to go over to them and encircle them in her arms.

Misao said softly, "The kid looks really raw. He's kind of scary."

Kaoru just nodded. It was true, Enishi had an air about him of not only grief but a seething rage, his cold aqua eyes blazing with the emotion, his face darkly scowling. There was a short distance between he and Kenshin as they sat together but there was a deep hostility present that showed a vast chasm between the two.

Kaoru studied the boy and inwardly shuddered as her swordsmen's spirit could not help but pick up the radiating fury within the youth's ki. She wondered if Enishi was blaming Kenshin for his sister's death. Her heart went out to the boy yet at the same time she became increasingly uneasy.

The line moved slowly and soon Kaoru and Misao were almost to the end as some faculty from the journalism department came to the budusan and knelt to offer their prayers. They passed and the girls stepped forward to kneel on the cushions before the memorial budusan.

Kaoru gazed upon the photograph of Tomoe. She saw a breathtakingly beautiful young woman with a sweet smile that seemed to carry a burden of sadness, of one whose youth had been stripped away by the weight of tragedy, and one who had thrust upon her the role of mother at an early age to raise her younger brother. Not unacquainted with loss herself, Kaoru began to feel an affinity for the woman who had risen above difficult circumstances and reached a life of success in spite of them,her life tragically cut short all too soon. She bowed her head and prayed as the essence of the deceased woman entwined within the soft fragrance of the white plum blossoms encircled her.

Her prayer completed, Kaoru rose slowly and joined Misao as she patiently waited so they could approach Kenshin and offer their friendship and support. They both stopped before Enishi first.

"Gomen nasai," Misao said politely to the boy who barely acknowledged the gesture with a curt nod. Kaoru did the same and Enishi did likewise, buried in his own sorrow.

The girls moved to Kenshin who glanced up in gratitude to see his two friends. He gave them both a sad smile as he rose to accept an embrace from Misao.

"Oh Himura, what can I say? I'm so very, very sorry!" the gamin girl stated as she hugged him, her teal eyes glistening with tears.

"Arigatou Misao-dono," Kenshin said as he returned the hug.

Kaoru watched the exchange with a feel of apprehension for what had happened the last time she had seen Kenshin so she did not mind if Misao prolonged her embrace. But then she saw warm, violet orbs filled with gratitude and pain gazing at her over the coal head of Misao so her heart went to her stomach and she was filled with the desire to offer her comfort.

The embrace over, Misao slipped out of Kenshin's arms and Kaoru came up to him, her eyes soft and sympathetic as she spoke her words of condolence.

"Kenshin, I---,"

What Kaoru was about to say was cut off by Kenshin as he engulfed her in a close embrace, clinging to her as if she were a lifeline and he was about to fall into a bottomless abyss. She became breathless as her mind whirled and her heart pounded, his arms tight around her.

After a while he gently pushed back and grasped her by the arms then said softly with fervor, "I'm so glad you came. I wanted to call you but I was busy with the arrangements for the memorial and to have Tomoe cremated."

"You had to do that?" she asked incredulously.

Kenshin glanced at Enishi who was still in his own world and pulled Kaoru aside near a bamboo curtain away for privacy. He said, "Enishi was the only one left in Tomoe's family. The aunt he was staying with was a distant relative who was paid by a small bit of money left by the father when he and their mother passed away. After all this time, there was barely enough to have Tomoe cremated. Now that the money's completely gone, she told me she was washing her hands of the responsibility of caring for Enishi so he's pretty much my responsibility now."

Kaoru stated, "But you're not even family."

"What else could I do?" he said helplessly. "Besides, Tomoe and I had begun talking about marriage recently and I knew we'd have to take care of him."

Kaoru's eyes grew wide at the revelation _so they were considering marriage. No wonder he had stopped coming over so much. _She ignored the pang inside as she sighed and shook her head. "So now he's your responsibility?"

Kenshin frowned as he replied, "Either that or he's homeless on the streets. And I just couldn't let that happen to him." He glanced at the taciturn youth and then shook his head. "Tomoe would've wanted her brother cared for."

Kaoru remarked, "That's a truly honorable thing you're doing, Kenshin."

He smiled and shrugging it off changed the subject and asked, "You going to be around later?"

"Yeah I guess so. Why?"

"No reason. I just want to know in case---," he left it trailing, his amethyst eyes full of meaning and Kaoru's heart skipped a beat. Before she knew it she reached and took hold of his shoulders.

"If you need me, I'll be around."

"Arigatou, Kaoru," Kenshin whispered as he grasped her elbows and leaned in to plant a kiss on her forehead.

She blushed and pushed away stammering, "I-I've got to go. Take care." And she hurried out with Misao right behind her. . . .

………………………………………………………..

Later that night, Kaoru was alone as Misao had gone out with Aoshi and she was sitting in the parlor, clad in an oversized T-shirt and jeans shorts trying to read but her eyes were on the same sentence for at least an hour. Try as she might, she could not get the ordeal with Tomoe's death out of her mind. And try as she might, she could not shake the uneasiness that she felt from Tomoe's dour brother. It was obvious that the boy was filled with rage, a powderkeg that could blow at any time and she could not help but worry.

It was nearly one o'clock when Kaoru finally gave up on reading and sighed in irritation as she closed the book shut with a snap then got up to head to her bedroom to turn in. She reached to turn a small lamp on for Misaobefore she turned off the bright one she had on when there was a knock on the door. Curious and a bit apprehensive at a visitor so late at night, she hesitated as she leaned on the door.

"Who is it?" she barked, trying to sound tough.

A familiar tenor answered, "It's me, Himura Kenshin."

Surprised, Kaoru undid the chain lock and unlatched the door to open it. She gasped as she saw a rumpled Kenshin before her, hair in wild disarray, his clothes disheveled, and his stance wavering and unsteady.

"Kenshin, are you all right?" she asked as she stepped back to let him in. As he passed the odor of alcohol was present and strong as his gait seemed to be just short of a stagger obviously drunk. He went to the sofa and sank down, burying his face in his hands.

Alarmed, Kaoru went and sat beside Kenshin afraid to say anything but seeing the overwhelming despair in him she quashed her feeling and reached out to comfort her friend.

"You didn't drive here, I hope?" Always the practical one she inwardly cursed her choice of words to say.

Kenshin shook his head then raised it to gaze at her with red-rimmed violet orbs. "I walked here," he said in a tired voice.

Kaoru inquired, "What happened, Kenshin?"

He continued staring at her in a daze, then leaned back and replied, "Enishi is gone. He ran away."

"Ran away?"

Kenshin nodded, "After the memorial visiting hours, I offered to take him back to my place. When we got there, he just picked up his belongings and said that he was leaving so I asked him why. He said that he'd rather live on the streets then with the murderer of his sister. I tried to reason with him but after everything that happened I just lost it. So I told him fine, do what you want, and he left. After that, I went out got drunk and here I am." He shook his head bitterly, his self-loathing apparent. "First I killed his sister and now I send a 13 year-old kid out to live on the streets."

He lowered his head again so Kaoru wrapped her arm about his slumped shoulders. "Kenshin, you did not murder Tomoe. It was an accident. And as far as Enishi is concerned, you did everything you could."

He shook his head vehemently. "Iie, I didn't. I did nothing but bring suffering to him. He's right to hate me."

Her heart constricted for the heavy yoke of guilt Kenshin had taken on. "That may be true," Kaoru said softly. "But you have done more than even a relative has so you have no reason to feel like that."

Kaoru watched as Kenshin slowly raised his head to gaze at her, his expression one of dubious gratitude. She gave him a small smile and was surprised when he reached over and ran his hand across her cheek, soft as a breeze. Her eyes were drawn to the vast well of sorrow deep in his amethyst eyes and her heart ached for him as he leaned back again weary and wan.

"I need to go home and get some sleep," he stated as he rose slowly and swaying to his feet.

Kaoru rose as well. "Kenshin, it's late. Why don't you just stay here tonight?"

He gave her an exhausted smile as he shook his head. "I've burdened you too much already. I should go." Kenshin started for the door but Kaoru took hold of him and protested.

"You're dead on your feet, you'll never make it all the way back to your place."

"I don't live that far," he insisted.

But Kaoru was undaunted. "Onegai, Kenshin, stay here on the couch, I'll go get an extra blanket and a pillow."

Too tired to argue, Kenshin nodded and sank back down on the sofa as Kaoru padded back to her room and opened the closet to get the extra blanket and pillow she kept there. She retrieved the items and went back out to the parlor.

"Okay, this should be warm en---," she began as she entered the parlor and stopped in mid stride as she saw Kenshin stretched out on the sofa, passed out, snoring softly.

Never moving her eyes from Kenshin she crept over to him and spread the blanket over his prone form, his deep breathing indicating his state of unconsciousness. She reached over and removed his shoes then knelt down beside his head and gently lifted it to place the pillow beneath. Satisfied that he was comfortable, Kaoru leaned back and made to rise but something made her stay as she observed his slumber and so still crouched there she gazed upon him. Her sapphire eyes took in the way sleep had eased away the tension of grief and made his visage calm, framed by the amazingly soft flame locks. In that state, she could see how really young he was and saw him as the boy he once was, innocent and free of the burdens he now felt impelled to take on.

On an impulse, Kaoru reached her hand and brushed back his tousled bangs, and studied his now closed eyes, wondering what thoughts lay beneath the violet orbs. She shuddered as she recalled as the eyes had changed last nightin the encounter with the ER staff when they were speaking disrespectfully about Tomoe's body. At that thought, Kaoru made to remove her hand and was startled to find like in her car last night, it had been gripped tightly by Kenshin.

His eyes opened and bathed her in gold-tinted amethyst warmth as he took it palm up and placed a kiss on it, then with both his hands, held it against his scabbed cheek with the cross.

"Arigatou Kaoru-tenshi," he murmured as sleep once again claimed him.

Kaoru gasped softly as she became suddenly nervous confused by both the gesture and the endearment. As not to awaken him she slowly, delicately withdrew her hand and jumped to her feet to scurry back to the safety of her bedroom, closing the door firmly as she took a deep breath to quiet her nerves. She quickly got into her bed and snapped off the light, plunging her room in darkness so she could close her eyes and fall asleep. But instead, she lay there for a long time, remaining wide awake in the dark as her heart pounded like a drum, her emotions in turmoil.

**NEXT----CHAPTER 3...STUDY---- KENSHIN**


	4. CHAPTER 3 COLOR STUDY SHADOWS KENSHIN

_Author's Note: Here's where the heavy duty angst comes, first with Kenshin and the next chapter with Kaoru. And fair warning, if the way Kenshin is portrayed upsets anyone, this is an A/U story and he's grieving the way men grieve by burying themselves in sex and liquor so he's OOC---besides nobody knows how he dealt with Tomoe's death, in the OVA he just walks away after setting their house on fire. And I want to give a very special thanks to Skenshingumi for all the lovely and constructive reviews of my body of RK fanfiction. It brought great joy to my heart to open my e-mail and find it full of your reviews so I hope this chapter meets your expectations and shows Kenshin's grief in a tangible way. And a huge thanks to all my other faithful reviewers and the readers._

**CHAPTER 4... COLOR STUDY….SHADOWS---- KENSHIN**

A week passed, two, then three as life undoubtedly went on regardless of what traumas have taken place in people's lives. The student body of the university was deep into the studies of the spring semester, as mid-terms and spring break loomed and so everyone was busy hitting the books, including Sagara Sanosuke who was cramming at the library with his girlfriend, Takani Megumi, an honors pre-med major. She was an exceptional student with a flawless 4.00 grade point average and had a diligence at her study habits that was rubbing off on her rather easygoing beau. This day found the both of them deep into the books in a secluded corner of the library.

Sano was totally absorbed by the view of Megumi as she was pouring over her anatomy text and writing notes as he feigned interest in his own Advanced Literature notes. Megumi, always sharp glanced up from her studies and caught his warm umber eyes perusing her lazily.

She admonished in a whisper, "You're never going to pass your midterms if you spend all your study time gawking at me."

He grinned and favored her with a wink. "I can't help it, I'm just enjoying the view."

Megumi sniffed but blushed in pleasure as she retorted, "You're incorrigible, tori-atama. You keep this up and you'll flunk out."

Sano's grin faded as he thought of his roommate and best friend. "Iie, I won't but I'm not so sure about Kenshin. He's definitely not himself."

Megumi opened her mouth to reply but the librarian, a strict military type older woman with an iron gray bun glared and shushed at them with a scowl on her mawkish visage. The pretty pre-med student smiled a charming apology at her while Sano smirked and shrugged so satisfied, the librarian took her leave.

"What a grouch! We weren't that loud," he protested watching the warden march away.

Megumi shot him a sour look as she said in a harsh whisper, "We shouldn't have been talking at all. We came here to study."

Sano had the grace to appear sorry. Sighing, he slammed his book and notebook shut as he hissed, "I can't concentrate."

Megumi sniffed, "You would if you paid more attention to your books and less attention toward me."

Sano threw her a roguish grin. "C'mon, let's split over to the CU. I'm hungry." He stood up gathering his books as Megumi sighed resignedly.

"All right." She rose, picked up her books and followed. . . .

A few minutes later, the couple was sitting in the college union, sharing a sandwich and continuing their conversation as the place was busy as usual, with the speakers playing some Pink Floyd. Megumi took another bite of Sanosuke's tuna sub as she made her inquiry.

"So you really think Ken-san's going to flunk out, huh?"

Sano nodded, his mouth full after a bite of sandwich. He swallowed and replied, "Yeah, he's been blowing off classes since Tomoe's memorial and getting crocked every night."

Megumi's sherry eyes widened as she exclaimed, "I don't believe it! Ken-san was always so studious. His courses are very important to him."

Sanosuke finished chewing and swallowed as he answered, "They were. He's really taken Tomoe's death hard though. No matter what I say, he's got himself convinced that it was his fault they crashed and she died. And her kid brother bailing the way he did has just made him even more so." He reached over to offer her another bite.

Shaking her head, Megumi refused as she said, "He shouldn't think that way. He wasn't at fault, it was an accident."

"True, but you know Kenshin. He's so torn up inside about losing Tomoe, he refuses to do anything but sleep and drink. He's barely eaten a thing and he's been going out and coming home in the wee hours usually with some chick he's picked up."

Megumi was incredulous as she expostulated, "You're putting me on! Ken-san is not that kind of man, he does not sleep around."

Sano said solemnly, "Men do strange things when we're in pain, kitsune. And Kenshin's no different. I just wish---," he left it trailing as he suddenly thought of Kaoru and how Kenshin had been ignoring her calls.

"What?"

Sano shook his head. "Nothing." He finished the sandwich and then rose as he said, "C'mon, let's head back to my place."

Megumi nodded and followed. . .

In the townhouse apartment, the shade in the large picture window was still drawn, effectively blocking out the bright afternoon sun, keeping the dwelling dark. The place was as still as a tomb, with no sign of life whatsoever. Down the hallway there was two doors to the two bedrooms, one door open which was Sano's and the room empty, the other door to Kenshin's room closed.

Inside the closed portal on the full sized bed, a blanket covered lump barely moved as the only sound in the room was of soft breathing indicating that Kenshin was still in deep slumber. He lay with his titian head partially covered and stretched as he gradually came into consciousness, his head pounding with the typical hangover from a night of drinking. Groaning, he painfully sat up and held his head as he forced himself to awareness still numb from the heavy drinking of the night before.

On the other side of the bed, another lump stirred as a young woman named Shura yawned and called in a sleepy alto, "Himura?"

Kenshin lifted his head slowly and turned to see the girl smile and greet him as she sat up and leaned in for a kiss. He grimaced and recoiled, causing her to pout.

"Well, good morning to you too," she said in a snippy tone, miffed.

He sighed and apologized, "I'm sorry. I'm not awake yet and my head is killing me." He swung his legs over the side and sat on the edge of the bed to try to get his bearings.

She said matter-of-factly, "Well, that's what you get for mixing beer with shots of sake. I can't mix and I guess you shouldn't either."

Kenshin groaned, "Could you please can the lecture?" He reached down on the floor for his shorts to put on.

"Well," she humphed and reached for her own clothes. She dressed quickly as he began donning a pair of jeans and both were silent as the previous evening activity was forgotten.

Shura sat on the edge of the bed, slipping her shoes on. Fully dressed, she then stood up and approached Kenshin as he was gripping the back of a chair and leaning over hanging his head as if in intense pain, his long locks veiling his face. She reached to grasp his shoulders and was dismayed as he flinched and moved away.

Shura sighed as she said, "Give me a call later, okay?"

Kenshin just nodded as she sighed again and turned to the door. She opened it and walked out just as the front door opened and Sanosuke and Megumi came into the apartment. Both stood and stared at Shura as she made her way into the living room.

She glanced at the couple as she reached in her jeans pocket for a piece of paper. Handing it to Sanosuke she said, "There's my number. Give it to him."

Sano nodded as she slipped past him and let herself out. Glancing at his girlfriend he said, "Well, guess I'll just file this with the others." He put the scrap of paper in the trash.

Megumi stated archly, "She asked you to give that to Ken-san."

"I know. But believe me, I just saved him the trouble since that's what he's done with the other chicks' phone numbers," Sano reasoned as Kenshin's bedroom door opened.

A sound of footsteps padded down the hall and into the bathroom punctuated by the door firmly closing, indicating that Sano's roommate had joined the land of the living once more. He glanced at Megumi as he reached over to open the shade to let the daylight in.

The muffled flush of the toilet was heard then the bathroom door opened and Kenshin emerged bare-chested, clad only in a pair of faded jeans. Oblivious to his surroundings, he strode over to the refrigerator, opened the door and took out a beer. The door closed, he opened the beer and drank down half of it, breathing deeply as he leaned against the sink, holding the cold bottle to his throbbing forehead.

Sano glanced at Megumi and then stepped into the kitchen area. "A little hair of the dog, eh buddy?"

With eyes closed, Kenshin ignored his friend as he tipped the bottle again and downed a healthy draught, nearly finishing the bottle. He belched and then cracked open his bloodshot eyes as he focused on Sanosuke.

"You finished studying?" Kenshin asked as he finished his beer and tossed the dead soldier in the trash. He reached into the refrigerator for another.

Megumi joined Sano as she asked in concern, "Ken-san, have you eaten anything at all?"

Kenshin took a deep swallow, grimaced and replied, "Onegai, don't mention food. Even the thought of it makes me want to hurl."

She sniffed, "Small wonder."

Wordlessly Kenshin took his beer and passed the two to head into the living room. He cried out in pain as the bright light from the open window hit his red rimmed orbs.

"Kuso, Sano what're you trying to do, kill me?" he complained as he flopped on the sofa and covered his eyes with a pillow. Sanosuke and Megumi followed him and stood above him with arms folded looking the most part like two parents reprimanding a wayward child.

"Humph, some fresh air and sunshine would do you good," Megumi scolded.

Kenshin pulled the pillow away to cast a jaundiced eye at her. "Thanks for the suggestion doc but I'm doing fine really."

Now Sano got into the act. "Oh, is that so? Then why have you blown off every class now for almost three weeks, huh? And you've missed kendo practice, Saito is probably ready to kick your ass."

"Who cares?" Kenshin said with a shrug.

Sano's eyes widened then narrowed as he roared, "Get that damned thing out of your face and talk to us!"

"What're you my father?" Kenshin asked in a snide tone.

Megumi's eyes widened at the insolent manner by which the diminutive redhead was speaking which was so unlike him. Usually he was so polite even with close friends. However, Sano was a bit more aggressive in his response. He reached down and snatched the pillow away and flung it down the hall.

"Drop the attitude, pal. We happen to care about you and we see you just throwing everything away that you worked so hard for. Kuso, I even heard that Saito is gonna drop you from the kendo team. Tell me, what would Hiko say then?"

Kenshin re-covered his eyes with his arm and grunted as the phone rang, interrupting the interrogation. Sano uttered a curse and went to answer it while Megumi sat in a chair next to Kenshin. She sighed deeply as she tried to reach him.

"Ken-san, you're scaring us," she beseeched him. "Tori-atama and I care about you and we see what has happened to you since Tomoe's death. We want to help you but you won't let us."

Kenshin sighed and removed his arm to look at the earnest concern radiating from the lovely pre-med honors student. He sat up and leaned over to take her hand.

"Megumi-dono, I appreciate your concern for me. But I'd just like to be left alone," Kenshin said quietly as Sano concluded the phone call and came over to the slouched form of his roommate.

He stated, "That was the administrative office at the university, Kenshin. Your professors have reported your absences to them and you are officially on academic probation." He watched his friend's reaction to the grave news and was shocked and dismayed by the cold indifference.

"So?"

Sanosuke was incredulous. "So? So? So it means that if you don't get your act together, you're gonna flunk out. You've missed several classes and missed quite a few assignments and I can only cover so much for you by bringing home my notes and the work to you. It's up to you to do it and turn it in but you haven't done that."

Kenshin groaned, "Sano--,"

Undaunted, Sano plunged on, "Have you considered how Hiko will take your flunking out? You told me that he was against sending you here to the university in Tokyo, he said it was a waste of time. By skipping classes and flunking out you'll end up proving his point."

Kenshin's face was impassive as the words Sano spoke hung in the air. Megumi added her opinion in a soft but firm voice.

"Ken-san, you need to snap out of this. We know how much you loved Tomoe and we know that you're devastated by her death. But you need to go on living, Tomoe would have wanted that for you. What do you think she'd say if she saw you like this?"

The only reaction from Kenshin was that he shuddered slightly but his expression remained neutral and he sat like a stone, with his arms crossed. He replied in an oddly detached manner.

"She would say what you're saying. But I just want to be left alone." He closed his eyes as if to blot them and their words out.

Sano and Megumi sighed deeply as they both felt the keen frustration of beating their heads against the proverbial stone wall. Kenshin was proving to be stubbornly clinging to his own despair and was rapidly becoming a lost cause. He needed a jump start, something to shake him out of his inertia and Sano was wracking his brain to try to find something.

As if in answer, there was a knock on the door so Sano went over to see who it was. He grimaced as he opened the door and the lank form of Saito Hajime, captain of the kendo team was leaning outside on the stoop, a smoldering cigarette dangling from his smirking mouth. He arrogantly strode into the apartment uninvited.

Sano's umber eyes narrowed as he protested, "Hey, I didn't invite you to come in."

Megumi rose and wrinkled her nose in distaste. "You know, second hand smoke is a health hazard for those of us who don't smoke."

"Aa, and it's rude to smoke in someone's home without asking them," Sanosuke snapped.

"Fine." Saito went over to the door and tossed the butt out then turned to the two as he said, "Satisfied now?" He then turned away and looked in scorn at Kenshin, still slouched on the sofa.

"I didn't come here for a lecture on health or etiquette, I came to see the Battousai or what was called the Battousai a month ago. But this lump in front of me can't be him."

On the side curious, Megumi asked Sano sotto voce, "Who's the Battousai?"

Her boyfriend replied, "That's Kenshin's name on the kendo team. Everyone has a nickname like Saito's is Ookami. Kenshin's called that 'cause he's mastered battoujitsu."

"I see."

Over on the sofa and oblivious to his taunt, Kenshin asked flatly, "What do you want, Saito? Why are you here?"

Saito smirked as he replied, "Nothing, I just wanted to see if the rumors were true." He leaned down and peered into Kenshin's face, irritating him as he jerked his head away, glowering.

Saito threw his head back and laughed, his narrow wolf-like eyes showing no mirth, cold and piercing. He continued, "I also came because the sensei wanted to know if you ever intend to join us at practice. We do have a major tournament coming up in Osaka, before the championship and he wants to make sure you'll be there."

Kenshin glared at Saito as he said sarcastically, "Even if I'm not, I'm sure you'll be more than willing to fill in won't you, ookami?"

Saito snorted, "I would but the sensei wants you to be our first seed, then me then Shinomori. It seems he has perfected a style using double kodachi. He calls it Kaiten Kenbu Rukuren and even I admit it's quite formidable."

Kenshin said sardonically, "Afraid you're getting upstaged, Saito?"

"Hardly," Saito scoffed. "I'm just doing what was asked of me even if I do feel it's a waste of my time. In my opinion, the team can do just fine without you."

Sano smirked as he pointed out, "Sounds like sour grapes from your part, Saito."

The kendo team captain said acerbically, "Not at all, moron. But as the team captain, it's my job to lead the team so that's why I agreed to come here." He turned and headed toward the door, reaching in his shirt pocket for a cigarette. He lit it and opened the door to let himself out but turned with a parting shot.

"I'll tell sensei not to count on you. You look like hell for one thing and for another you've gotten so scrawny I doubt you could hold your own against our scrubs let alone the team from Osaka. See ya around." He headed down the stairs.

Sano and Megumi exchanged glances then their attention shifted as Kenshin shot to his feet and hurried out the door.

"Saito!" he barked. "I'll be at the next practice, that I will! And the first thing I'm gonna do is defeat you!"

Saito turned and saw the livid Kenshin, his unruly flame tresses flying in the breeze. He smirked and gave a mocking salute, then headed to his black Honda.

Kenshin went back inside, slamming the door. Without a word, he marched into the bathroom and then the echo of rushing water of the shower was heard. Sano and Megumi looked at each other, relief in their eyes as Sano made a statement that expressed both their unspoken wish.

"Looks like Kenshin got the jump-start he needed, kitsune."

Megumi nodded with her eyes closed and a glad smile, thanking Kami above.

……………………………………………………………

That seemed as it was the defining moment and so Kenshin gradually re-entered the realm of the living, attending classes again, and kendo practice albeit grudgingly. He remained in a mild state of depression, however going through the motions of sitting in classes and being there in body, but as far as the west from the east in spirit. His thoughts were almost constantly on the accident and Tomoe, and at night he tossed and turned as visions of her haunted him. The lack of sleep was taking its toll on him and he often napped during his classes drawing the wrath of his professors as they reprimanded him for his listless performance. He listened sullenly as he assured them he would do better.

On the strong suggestion of his professors, Kenshin entered into grief counseling with the university psychologist, Jinpuu a man of large stature and gentle compassion as he attempted to help Kenshin come to terms with Tomoe's death. But it was a daunting task, as during the sessions instead of opening up, he retreated within himself behind a wall that was proving to be quite the defense, impenetrable his eyes cold and amber.

It was toward the end of the most recent session when Jinpuu made a rather unusual observation and a decision. He began with a statement.

"Well, once again we've spent an hour saying nothing and getting nowhere. Himura-san I have something to say. You've been coming for several sessions and have yet to really get to the root of your grief, which is more then the death of the woman you loved."

Kenshin flinched ever so slightly as he answered dourly, "I agree these sessions have been a waste of time because I really have nothing to say." He sat with his arms folded, immovable.

Jinpuu studied Kenshin intently as he said, "Oh I think you have plenty to say," he sighed as he admitted, "But I'm afraid you're right. I cannot help someone who insists on hanging on to their guilt and self-hatred. So I'm discharging you from care." He closed his notebook with resignation but continued as Kenshin rose to his feet and grabbed his bogu for kendo and turned to leave. Jinpuu stopped him with a gesture.

"Before you go, Himura-san let me give you some advice. Everyone deals with personal tragedy in their own way. Some confront it head on, grieve freely and move on. Some hold everything in to appear strong to family and friends and let it out when they're alone. And then there are those who keep it inside and let it fester until they shatter into a million pieces."

Kenshin sighed and said a bit impatiently, "Your point being."

Jinpuu went on. "My point is that you shouldn't keep everything bottled up inside, you need to release. It's an important part of grieving." At the closed expression on the young man's face he added, "It's obvious you couldn't open up here because you never trusted me but there must be someone you trust, someone you feel that you can open up to."

Kenshin closed his eyes and sighed as he said to himself _there was but that someone is gone and it's all my fault_. Then, the vision of sparkling twin sapphire eyes came to him and he murmured, "Kaoru."

Jinpuu perked up. "Who?"

Kenshin shook his head. "Nobody." He then bowed formally as he took his leave. "Arigatou for everything."

Jinpuu bowed and Kenshin exited. Once outside the office, he leaned against the wall and took a deep breath as his mind teemed with thoughts of Kaoru. He had been purposely avoiding thinking about her since that night he had spent on her couch. . .

**_The next morning Kenshin had stirred, his head pounding with the hangover from the drinking he had done the night before. He blearily opened his eyes, and thinking he was at his own place when he got up and noticed he was actually someplace else. _**

**_"Where am I?" he asked aloud then glanced about and suddenly recognized the feminine touches his own apartment lacked, the silk flower arrangements and pastel blue drapes. He then remembered he had somehow made his way to Kaoru and Misao's place after he became so inebriated last night._**

_**Kenshin then remembered his exchange with Kaoru and her insistence at in his condition that he stay and then he remembered how in a semi-conscious state he felt a soft caress and opened his eyes to a raven haired angel, her lovely face soft with concern. He had grasped her cool, soft hand for security and promptly fell back asleep.**_

_**Kenshin sighed and he then spotted a note propped on the kitchen table. He went over and retrieved the note. It read:**_

_**Kenshin---**_

_**There's some fresh coffee on the counter and help yourself to anything in the frig. Please eat something. I went to class and will be back for lunch. **_

_**Kaoru**_

_**Forgetting his hangover Kenshin's heart warmed at the sweet concern in the few scrawled words and said softly, "Arigatou Kaoru-tenshi."**_

At the memory Kenshin felt his eyes tear up and he was again filled with conflicting emotions. Part of him was still deeply missing Tomoe and was feeling the desolation of her loss. But the other part of him was thinking about Kaoru and her gentle support and felt increasingly guilty. She had called frequently after that night but filled with the feeling that he was betraying the memory of Tomoe, he blew her off, not answering the phone or having Sano make excuses for him. Deep down he knew what he was doing was lousy but he could not deal with his undeniable feelings for her and the fact that they were in conflict with his still strong feelings for Tomoe. So he did the easy thing, avoided Kaoru. But the actual fact was that avoiding her had become the most difficult thing, second only to grieving for Tomoe. So he had sought forgetfulness in drinking and meaningless sexual encounters.

Kenshin sighed as he collected himself _somehow, I've got to pull myself together and see her. I really do need to talk to someone and she always was a good listener from the time we first met. I've spent hours talking to her about Tomoe and she just listened, no questions asked._ He gathered up his gear and headed to practice. . . .

In the practice hall of the university the kendo team was gathered for waza-geiko and kakari-geiko as they readied themselves for the tournament in Osaka next week. Baisotei Akira, the senior sensei was at the front pairing off opponents. At the back of the room Saito Hajime watched with a smirk as Kenshin walked in. Kenshin approached as Baisotei-sensei finished pairing fighters off and addressed him.

"Ahh, Himura-san it is good to see you," the sensei said. "I hope all is well."

Kenshin managed a bland smile as he bowed politely. "Hai, sensei. Forgive me for being absent from practice."

Baisotei-sensei and gestured to the rear where the practice dummies were lined up. "Kamiya-san!"

_Kamiya-san? No it couldn't be_ Kenshin said to himself. But he did a double take when he saw the petite figure with abundant raven tresses tied up in a topknot, clad in full bogu come up to where he and the sensei were waiting.

"Hai, sensei," Kaoru said obediently, her bokken in hand. She stood there, a neutral expression on her delicate features.

"K-Kaoru? Is that you?" Kenshin asked dumbly still in amazement at seeing the subject of his recent thoughts in all places, at his kendo practice.

She gave a bow and polite smile. "Hello Kenshin." His eyes were still registering surprise, but before Kenshin could ask any questions Baisotei-sensei nodded in satisfaction.

"Good, you know each other so I don't have to introduce you. Get into position for wazi-geiko."

"Hai, sensei." Kaoru went and positioned herself for wazi-geiko and so recovered from his initial shock Kenshin followed suit. He felt the strong twinge of guilt as he ascertained that she probably (and rightfully so) was quite annoyed with him by nature of her stance and the narrowing of her eyes.

"Hajime!" Baisotei-sensei barked and the exercise began.

Raising her bokken in a chudan no kamae Kaoru came at Kenshin with a cry and he parried the attack, knocking her off balance. She stumbled and rebounded to come at him again as the match continued.

Kenshin stopped at the sensei's cry of "Yame!" and addressed his partner, "I had no idea you had joined the kendo team, Kaoru."

She took a deep breath then replied coolly, "No wonder. You've been among the missing for three weeks." She then got into a jodan no kamae for the next match.

"Hajime!" the command was sounded and the fighting resumed. Kenshin saw the underlined anger in Kaoru's moves and he mused _well, I guess I was right, she's really angry at me. She has a good reason, I really did blow her off, I hope she can forgive me._ Guilt overwhelmed him as he immediately was put on the defensive.

The practice continued as the next match was a kata of kiri-kaeshi, then kakari-geiko with both Kenshin and Kaoru in a fierce battle as each used their heated emotions to focus their attacks, holding nothing back.

About two hours later at the conclusion of the session Kaoru bowed formally, picked up her bogu then without a word turned to leave but was detained as Kenshin grabbed her sleeve.

"Wait a minute, Kaoru," he pleaded.

She stopped. "What?"

Kenshin said, "I want to talk to you. Onegai?"

Kaoru sighed and dropped her gear. "Is that so? Then why haven't you answered my calls, huh?" She whirled and skewered him with a cold indigo glare. "Don't you know how worried I've been? Damn you!"

Kenshin lowered his head in shame. "I-I know and I'm sorry."

Kaoru gave an unladylike snort. "Oh right." Her head bowed now she continued in a sad, subdued manner. "After you called me to come to the hospital after the accident and then came to my place the night after the memorial service I thought you trusted that I'm here for you no matter what that you can depend on me but I guess I was wrong. See ya." She made to leave but he stepped in front of her and grasped her arms.

"Kaoru," Kenshin began. "Onegai, listen to me. I didn't answer the phone or answer you back because I've been in really bad shape and I couldn't face anyone, even you." He beseeched her with his earnest violet eyes. "You have to believe me."

Kaoru looked uncertain but Kenshin plunged on. "Kaoru, I've been needing to talk to someone for a while and right now you're the only one I trust to talk to."

"Oh Kenshin," Kaoru said softly.

Kenshin urged, "Let's get out of here and go to find a quiet place."

She suggested, "I know a place. There's a park not far from here and it stays open till 11 with benches near a fountain. I go there when I want to be alone and think. How does that sound?"

He gave a sweet sad smile. "Sounds perfect. Let's go." He reached down and picked up her bogu, slung it over his shoulder, and took her elbow. . .

The sun was just beginning to dip toward the western horizon bathing the neatly landscaped park grounds in golden light. The park was nowhere near deserted, as many took advantage of the early warm spring weather, with brightly garbed joggers abounding and children in the play area, their shouts at play drifting over on the balmy breeze.

"Over there." Kaoru pointed at an empty bench near a large fountain, spraying up geysers of clear water that glistened like topaz in the late afternoon sun.

Kenshin followed her lead as she went over and sat on the bench, leaning back and stretching in the rays as he joined her. He sneaked a peek at her and felt the familiar admiration for her rise up in him as the zephyr wafted the soft scent of jasmine to his nostrils. As both were still clad in the hakama and gi and were sweaty from practice, Kenshin could not help but think that even dressed like that Kaoru was beautiful.

He began, "You were pretty good in there. Since when did you join the team?"

Kaoru answered casually, "For about two weeks now. Baisotei-sensei had heard about our dojo here in Tokyo and he approached me one day in the CU. He asked me to come and try out so I did. And I made the team."

"Omedeto Kaoru." Kenshin smiled in pleasure as he patted her hand. "I knew you could do it. Remember, I had encouraged you to join the team."

It was true. During one of their sparring matches for fun, he had urged her to join the kendo team when the co-ed sports regulations at the university had gone into effect. But Kaoru had demurred saying that she had no time. He was very glad that she had changed her mind.

Kaoru nodded as she added, "I was reluctant at first but my father encouraged me. It was the first thing about my going to college that he supported so I was thrilled."

Kenshin asked in concern, "So how's he doing?"

She sighed deeply as she replied, "About the same. I thought he was quitting drinking because I had gone home for several weekends and he had been sober and it was wonderful." Her face had a smile and then like a cloud passing over the sun it faded as she continued, "But it didn't last long, he's been drunk again the last two weekends and back to being distant toward me."

"I'm sorry," Kenshin said, his eyes soft as he took her hand in his.

Kaoru smiled as she squeezed his hand. "It's okay. But enough about me, tell me how you're doing."

Now Kenshin's smile faded as he replied, "I'm doing better. But I wasn't in great shape for a few weeks, I was skipping classes, kendo practice, work just about everything." He lowered his head in shame. "I was doing a lot of drinking and….," he trailed off.

Kaoru leaned in. "And?"

Kenshin confessed in a low tone. "I've been sleeping around quite a bit." He watched her reaction saw the shock on her face and felt a new rush of shame. He continued in a voice that was filled with self-loathing.

"I'm ashamed of myself but all I could think of was how much I was hurting and how I wanted the pain to stop. So I got drunk and picked up girls, bringing them back to my place or staying over at their places hoping like hell that they would help make me numb."

Kaoru asked softly, "And did they?"

Kenshin shook his head. "Only temporarily. The next morning I was in just as much pain with the extra added fun of a hangover." He gazed at her and said quietly, "That's why I didn't return your calls, I've been too ashamed, what with your father's drinking problem I didn't want to burden you with me."

Kenshin hung his head as Kaoru sat silent, the only sound he could hear was the tinkling of the water in the fountain and his own voice echoing inside condemning him. He surreptitiously glanced over at her and saw that she too had her head lowered, her eyes covered by her bangs. Then he was amazed when she hauled off and hit the back of his head.

Startled by her action, Kenshin opened his mouth to protest when Kaoru snapped, "Kenshin no baka, why did you think that? I'm your friend, baka and you can come to me anytime!" She turned away and impatiently brushed away the tears that began to flow.

He reached for her but she slapped his hand away as she continued, "You called me the night of the accident, and you came over that night after the memorial, why didn't you just come and talk to me?" She rose to her feet and began to pace as she went on.

"I came home from class that day and I thought you'd be there so we could talk. But you had gone, no note, no call, nothing for weeks. I thought you had dropped off the face of the earth."

Kenshin responded cryptically, "I wanted to." He stared at the setting sun as he thought of the depths of despair a man sinks into when he has realized that his reason for living was gone. He said in a faraway voice:

"I wanted to crawl into a hole and die so many times during the last three weeks that if I had courage, I'd have taken my life. But even in such pain I realized that suicide was no option." His amethyst eyes were bleak and lost as he went on. "I just wanted to lock myself away from everyone and everything, I just wanted out."

Head in his hands Kenshin added, "I was telling myself that I didn't deserve anyone's love or friendship, I had killed the woman I loved and drove her baby brother to the streets, I was worthless." He sobbed as tears stung his eyes and like a dam bursting after too much rain his pent up emotions broke as he began to weep bitterly.

It seemed like he had been weeping for eternity when he noticed the sunset had faded into evening as the moon rose and lent its light to the rapidly emptying park. The spray of the fountain was like sparkling like quicksilver and perpetually flowed endless like Kenshin's tears. The rivulets continued to fall from his violet orbsas his mind teemed with thoughts of Tomoe and Enishi, two people who he could conceivably believe had their lives ruined directly by his hand. But he was startled out of his maudlin thoughts as he felt two silken arms embrace him and engulf him in the soft fragrance of jasmine. He raised his head and saw that he was firmly in Kaoru's arms.

She murmured, "I know it's hard to believe now but everything is going to get better. You need to believe that, Kenshin."

He kept his head low as he shook it wordlessly, unbelief in her declaration uppermost in his mind as he felt the cold desolation of heartache. He felt soft hands pulling him to his feet.

"C'mon. Come back to my place with me and we'll eat. I'll order mushroom and olive pizza, okay?" she cajoled as he just followed and she headed to her car. . . .

The drive back was silent as conversation was at a loss between the pair. Kenshin felt spent, the tears he shed a catharsis as he mused about the vast quiet in his soul, something that had eluded him since the night of the accident. He glanced over at Kaoru and what had marveled him the most was that the time in the park with her listening as he released had done more than the two weeks of grief counseling with Jinpuu had. As his reverie continued he idly noticed that they were pulling into the parking lot at Kaoru's. She drove slowly to the open space in front of D-5 and pulled in, killing the lights and the motor as they both sat in the car, staring ahead.

After several minutes, Kaoru broke the voluntary vow of silence by remarking, "The lights are off, looks like Misao's out."

"Ummm," Kenshin replied suddenly exhausted.

She sighed and opened the door to exit. "Let's go inside and order the pizza."

Kenshin nodded and followed obediently as he climbed out. They both headed to the stairs to head up to the apartment when they were flooded with the twin head beams of an approaching vehicle. Neither paid any attention until they heard the soprano of Misao call out to them or specifically Kaoru.

"Kaoru! There you are, we've been looking all over for you!" The lights died as the low Mazda 626 of Shinomori Aoshi came into view and the man himself joined Misao as Kenshin joined Kaoru, automatically taking her hand as he sensed an impending disaster.

Puzzled, Kaoru turned toward her friend and asked, "What is it, Misao? You look really uptight."

Misao grasped her other hand and said urgently, "You got a call while you were at practice from Dr. Gensai."

Kaoru blanched as she demanded, "What happened?"

Misao hugged her as she said, "Your father's been in a car accident and is at Tokyo General Hospital."

Kaoru pushed away, sheer terror in her eyes as they filled with tears. "Oh NO!" she shrieked as Kenshin grasped her shoulders.

"It's okay, Kaoru we'll take you to the hospital," Kenshin said, forgetting his own grief to stand by her. He gestured toward Aoshi and the latter nodded and led everyone to his car for the drive.

**NEXT…..CHAPTER 5...COLOR STUDY…. SHADOWS----KAORU**


	5. CHAPTER 4 COLOR STUDY SHADOWS KAORU

_Author's Note: Here's where the tide is turned and Kaoru is now dealing with a crisis—and the saying misery loves company comes into play as Kenshin shows his care for her. Also here's where the main plot device, the assignment of her painting class comes forward and will from now on be a focal point in the story. Thanks so much readers who have given this story over 1200 hits and as always the reviewers._

_**Glossary of Japanese words and terms:**_

_**Aka-chan—--Baby --—according to my Japanese reference dictionary a loving term.**_

_**Otou-sama --—Father --—the honorific at the end indicates deep respect and considering Kaoru and her father have a strained relationship it is appropriate—usually the ending is "san"**_

_**Okaa-san --—Mother**_

_**Tenshi---Angel**_

_**Kanji---Japanese writing symbols**_

_**Koibito---Sweetheart**_

_**Onegai---Please**_

_**Ohayo—Good morning (familiar or casual)**_

_**Ozeki---Championship caliber sumo wrestler**_

**CHAPTER 5 ...COLOR STUDY…. SHADOWS----KAORU**

It was déjà vu…..

For the second time in less than a month Kaoru found herself in the pseudo-cheerful waiting area of a hospital emergency room, with Kenshin by her side. Only this time the roles had been reversed and she was the one teetering on the precipice of emotional collapse. Her eyes ached with the dryness that comes from shedding tears that seemed to be endless, like the ocean itself, just flowing without stopping. Kaoru sat huddled, folding into herself as she retreated behind her "wall" the impenetrable fortress behind which she barricaded herself to deal with the ongoing disasters that were the definition of her life. Hiding away, at least consciously afforded her some tiny scintilla of peace, however fleeting in the midst of chaos and tragedy. Subconsciously Kaoru found herself traveling down the dark corridor in her memories, the one that led to the other major tragic event of her life, the day her mother died. . . .

_**The day was bright and sunny, a direct paradox of the darkness in the soul of five-year-old Kaoru as she sat beside her mother's bed. The room was filled with the thick miasma of death signified by her mother's shallow breathing and the young girl's elfin face was streaked with tears as she watched the woman who gave her life slip away.**_

_**"Okaa-san," Kaoru sobbed as she lay her head on the barely moving chest, still warm and she felt her mother's arms encircle her.**_

_**Kamiya Kiyomi rasped, "K-Kaoru--." Her eyelids fluttered as she slipped away.**_

_**"Don't die, Okaa-san. Onegai don't die!" cried the child as firm hands grasped her thin shoulders.**_

_**Her father's harsh voice cut through the grief. "Kaoru, come out. Dr. Gensai is here now."**_

_**"She may stay if she wants," the kindly doctor said but Koshijiro shook his head as he barked, "You heard me, Kaoru."**_

_**"Hai, Otou-sama," she said meekly, sniffling. The little girl obeyed and went to the door, accompanied by her father. She stopped and looked at the bed as he forcefully pushed her out and slid the shoji shut in her face.**_

_**The little girl's lip quivered and she felt cold rejection as her father closed her away from the intimate family circumstance of her mother's last moments before she left this world. But by now Kaoru knew her father and the fact that her tears would make no dent in his hard heart, he would expect her to be strong and not to cry. However, her eyes wet and her heart broken, Kaoru slid down to the tatami and sobbed out her anguish, not caring about the consequences. . . . **_

Kaoru sat there in the waiting room, unaware of anything as she remained locked in her memory until a warm touch shook her from her reverie, and she saw a masculine hand encompass and squeeze her own. She looked up to see gentle compassionate violet eyes gazing at her. Kenshin's handsome face emerged from the blur of the rest of her surroundings and was the only thing real in what was becoming a living nightmare. She blinked twice and then saw Misao and Aoshi as well, Misao kneeling right before her.

"Kaoru-chan," her friend murmured. "Onegai, tell me what I can do for you. Can I get you something?"

Kaoru managed a slight smile that faded immediately as she shook her head. Words failed her as the tears flowed again, hiding her face in her hands and Kenshin wrapped his arm around her slumped shoulders, holding her close to offer his comfort. Breaking, she leaned into his embrace her tears wetting his clothes as the time ticked by. He rocked her gently as he murmured soft words of comfort.

It was quite a time later when the door to the emergency room opened and the portly figure of Dr. Gensai stepped into the waiting room and made his way to where Kaoru sat, his face kind but grim as he came to her.

"Kaoru-chan," he began.

She glanced up and jumped to her feet. Her friends encircled her and her pretty face filled with dread as she waited for the news. "H-hai, Gensai-sensei?"

"You know that your father was in a car accident."

She nodded, "Misao told me you called. So what happened?"

Dr. Gensai replied, "He was on his way home from teaching a class at a dojo in Koga." The doctor sighed as he said, "He was drunk and missed a curve on the road and crashed head on into a telephone pole."

Kaoru gasped as she cried, "Iie!"

He continued, "There was a witness in the car following him who called an ambulance and then when they brought him in barely alive the hospital called me. I came right away."

Kaoru watched with hollow eyes as Misao and Kenshin flanked her.

The kindly old surgeon sighed as he went on, "Well, I managed to save his life. He broke several ribs and punctured a lung but I was able to save it. But he's going to have a tough time recuperating and he will be going through alcohol withdrawal as well so we plan to keep him here."

Having heard the unbelievable events that had transpired Kaoru swayed slightly as Kenshin strengthened his hold and murmured to her, "Just hang on, koibito." He addressed the surgeon, "How long will he have to stay here?"

Dr. Gensai sighed again as he replied, "He's being moved to intensive care now for the next day or so as he stabilizes. After which he will be transferred to a detoxification unit to dry out."

Kaoru whispered, "Can I see him?"

"Of course. He's in the ICU now, I'll take you there."

"I'm going with you," Kenshin insisted but Kaoru shook her head.

"Iie, iie. I have to go alone." She gazed at him in gratitude as she said, "But stay here and wait for me, onegai?"

He reached in and kissed her forehead. "I'll be right here."

Misao and Aoshi also came forward. "That goes for us too, Kaoru-chan. We'll be here waiting for you," she said as she hugged Kaoru tight.

Arigatou, minna," Kaoru said as she wiped her eyes. She then cleared her throat and went with Dr. Gensai who took her arm and led her down the hall.

As they headed to the elevator, Kaoru was numb, wondering idly if her father would be able to know if she was even there as Dr. Gensai talked about the accident. She nodded as he droned on, her mind on what awaited her in the ICU. . . .

The elevator door slid open to the fourth floor where a sign saying INTENSIVE CARE UNIT was displayed over a busy central nursing station and then surrounding the command center were eight glass encased units bearing patients on various forms of life support from respirators, oxygen tents, heart machines, and attached to intravenous meds and plasma. The place was brightly painted but the heaviness of death hung like a cloud as each patient was in a battle for their lives.

Kaoru stepped out numbly as if sleepwalking as Dr. Gensai asked the head nurse briskly, "Which unit is Kamiya Koshijiro in?"

The nurse reached for the chart rack and pulled a chart. "He's in unit 5, Gensai-sensei." She glanced at Kaoru dubiously as she asked, "Is this young lady---,"

"His only daughter," Dr. Gensai said brusquely. "She is here to see him."

"Of course," the nurse responded. She pointed at the unit numbered 5. "He's in there, heavily sedated."

Dr. Gensai nodded in gratitude as Kaoru just headed to the unit, her eyes glassy yet trained on the occupant of the bed. Blinking back the tears that blurred her vision, she took a deep breath, squared her shoulders and walked in.

On the bed, Koshijiro lay unconscious, the room echoing with the sounds of a life hanging in the balance. The steady beep of the heart monitor, the compression sounds of the respirator and the soft drip of the intravenous tube all created a symphony of life and death each battling for the man in repose.

Taking a deep breath, Kaoru approached the bed with a fearful care, terrified by the view of her strong father, so weak, vulnerable and mortal, so unlike him. Even when he was roaring drunk, he seemed larger than life to her, always invincible. Like any father to his child, untouchable. Or so he had appeared.

Kaoru came to the side of the bed and pulled a chair up to the head. She sat there silently with tears rolling out of her ultramarine orbs as inside she cried out to him.

_Otou-sama, why? Why? Why are you here almost dead? Is this what you've desired all along for all these years after Okaa-san died? I know that you still cry for her, holding her favorite yellow kimono, I see you when you think I don't and try to hide your feelings in a jug of sake. I saw the pain that never leaves your eyes. You try so hard to keep up the front of being strong, but in reality you're shattered and in agony and have been for a long time. _

Kaoru sighed deeply and reached for her father's hand. _You've always pushed me away, Otou-sama, always made me feel as if I am a stranger instead of your daughter, your own flesh and blood. Yet I feel like you blame me for everything, for the failures of the dojo and even for your own failures. And I know you blame me for living when she died because after she had me, her health was never the same._

She sniffled as her vision blurred and the tears fell in earnest. _Why can't you let me in, Otou-sama? Why have you shut me out? We could've turned to each other and healed but instead we've turned away and fell apart. You turned to a bottle for comfort and I bury myself in other things and keep myself free from all close relationships and free from pain. I'm so afraid to allow myself to get close to anyone and hide behind the safety of my wall like you hide in your sake jug. _

Kaoru tightly grasped her father's hand and laid her head down sobbing. _Otou-sama, we should have been there for each other instead of going apart and suffering alone after Okaa-san died. We are a family and families stay together, so why can't we?_ She cried until totally spent, she fell asleep bent over the prone form of her father as the heart monitor beeped on through the night. . . .

The sound of someone entering the room and gently shaking her stirred Kaoru from her fitful slumber. Startled, her head shot up and in the dim dawn of a new day her bleary vision focused on the craggy visage of Dr. Gensai. He smiled kindly at her, as a nurse looked on over his shoulder.

"Come, Kaoru-chan." He took hold of her shoulders and urged her to her feet. "You need to get some rest. Why don't you go home? There's nothing to do here."

She protested weakly as she gazed at Koshijiro, "I-I c-can't. What if he wakes up, I want to be here!" She shook her head as the grandfatherly doctor strengthened his hold and pulled her away.

"Kaoru-chan, I promise you if there's any change, I will call you. Now, onegai go home and get some rest like a good girl." He guided her to the elevator, pushed the button and the doors slid open. Like a wind up doll, Kaoru walked woodenly in and turned as the doors closed.

Kaoru sighed as she pushed the button for the first floor and then rode down, her mind still filled with the sight of her father in the hospital bed. Numbed by the picture of her apparently indestructible patriarch so pale and borne of human frailties, she automatically stepped out when the stainless steel doors of the elevator slid open to the first floor. She barely noticed where she was or where she was headed when she plodded by the waiting room and her eyes fell on a titian haired man, which upon closer observation was her friend Himura Kenshin, with his head down dozing, seated in a corner chair.

As if he had sensed her, Kenshin's head popped up his violet eyes homing in and locking with her sapphire ones and he immediately was at Kaoru's side. Unlike her still clad in her kendo clothes, he had changed into a pair of jeans, a rust colored cotton T-shirt and his jeans jacket. Kaoru idly ascertained that he must have gone home during the night, changed his clothes, and returned. She began to wonder why when he grasped her by the shoulders and gazed into her haggard face with those riveting violet eyes.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, curious.

He replied with a gentle smile, "You asked me to wait so I did. Misao and Aoshi left around midnight and took me back to change then I came back."

"Oh."

"Are you all right, Kaoru?" he asked softly, his face filled with concern.

She returned the regard with glassy, unseeing eyes that showed the strain of too much weeping and not enough sleep. Kenshin gently ran his hand through her bangs, brushing them back as he spoke again with mild authority.

"Come with me, I have Sano's car and I'll take you home, tenshi." She gave a slight nod and followed obediently as he wrapped an arm about her waist and guided her through the front of the hospital to the exit and out into the early morning sunlight.

As they wordlessly walked past the hospital grounds toward the parking lot, they found themselves beneath a spreading pink canopy of sakura trees in new bloom, raining their petals down on a warm spring breeze. Kaoru came to a sudden stop as she glanced up at the flurry of petals and she spoke in a flat, almost conversational tone.

"I had no idea the sakura were blooming," she remarked. "It's only the second week of April."

"It has gotten quite warm very early this spring, that it has," Kenshin responded. He gazed at her as she roamed about the mini grove and was veiled by petals as the next gust of wind brought them down.

"Hmmm." Kaoru made a non-committal sound as she reached and caught some stray petals in her hand. In the same detached manner she stated, "It would be so much better if we were like the sakura blossoms, blooming only for a week then we die with no pain or suffering." She crushed the petals and let them fall from her fingers then turned and regarded him evenly as she inquired, "Don't you agree, Kenshin?"

Kenshin sighed as he replied, "But we're not sakura, Kaoru. We're flesh and blood humans. Pain and suffering is part of the burden we carry in our life."

"I know," she said resignedly. She sighed as she added, "I was just speculating. It seems that for some of us, pain and suffering are at a premium." She hugged herself and felt two arms encircle her.

"Kaoru-tenshi," he began, "I'm sorry for all the pain in your life. I know it must have been very hard for you, dealing with your father after your mother died."

Kaoru shook her head and answered, "I just wish he'd talk to me, not at me. All my life, all I've ever felt was useless and a drain, a millstone around his neck. That's why I insisted on moving out and going to school but he hated that too." She sniffled as tears flowed once again. "No matter what I do, I just can't please him."

She then felt herself turned around and crushed close to him as Kenshin's strong, lean arms tightened around her, his soft tenor tender and soothing in her ear.

"Kaoru-tenshi," he murmured. "You don't have to please anybody but yourself." He pulled back and cradled her face in his hands, brushing her tears away with his thumbs. "Trying to please others is only going to continue to make you feel like you're lacking. Those who truly love you will love everything about you and know the beautiful person you are inside and out," he said with a smile.

Kaoru gazed up at the handsome man smiling sweetly at her and saw with amazement the guileless regard for her, written in the amethyst orbs. The early morning sun was shining on his flame head, encircling it like a halo. She made a sharp intake of breath as he appeared as if she saw a heavenly vision for it was Kenshin who truly was the angel, not her as he was calling her. She felt her eyes dry up and she returned his smile.

"Arigatou, Kenshin," Kaoru whispered, thanking him for far more than the kind words of encouragement. She leaned in and kissed him on the cheek with a butterfly touch.

Pleasantly surprised by her gesture, his smile widened to a grin as he blushed slightly and then wrapped his arm about her shoulders. "C'mon, aka-chan. I'll take you home so you can get some rest." She vaguely noticed as he led her away toward the parking lot to a red compact car and opened the passenger door to let her in. Once inside the vehicle, the strain from the night before finally took its toll as she succumbed to her emotional exhaustion and immediately fell asleep. . . .

The borrowed red Toyota Corolla belonging to Sagara Sanosuke pulled into the apartment complex that Kaoru called home and into a spot by her silver Celica. She barely knew what was happening as Kenshin turned off the engine and turned to her.

"Kaoru?" he asked as he saw her curled up to the door and breathing softly, indicating she was slumbering. He shook her shoulder gently. "Kaoru, you're home now."

"Mmmm," she mumbled as she spooned herself closer to the door, still asleep.

Kenshin sighed as he opened the door to exit the car and made his way to the passenger door. Once there, he carefully opened it and reached in to scoop Kaoru up in his arms, closing the door with his foot.

With great delicacy, Kenshin carried the wearied girl up to the door where a worried Misao met him and ushered him in. She followed as he took Kaoru straight to her room and placed her on the bed tenderly, laying her on the pillows and drawing the covers over her. He then leaned down and kissed her on the forehead then crouched at her side gazing at her as he brushed her hair back.

Misao stood at the open door of Kaoru's room and watched the affectionate gesture until Kenshin rose silently and came to the portal to exit, brushing past Misao and closing the door softly as not to awaken her. Walking back to the front door, he said nothing until he opened it to leave. He then turned to Misao and made a simple request in a flat tone.

"Misao, make sure you call me if anything happens."

She came over with questions teeming in her teal eyes but he turned and left without a further word.

Several days later. . . .

Kaoru walked into the front lobby of Tokyo General and headed right to the elevator, carrying a small suitcase with clothes and personal grooming items for her father. Dr. Gensai had informed her that upon his awakening Koshijiro would have to go through detoxification treatment as required by law the night he was admitted to the hospital after the accident. He also expressed concern in Koshijiro's reaction to the news and asked if Kaoru could help to convince him to go. She had assured him that she would. So when she got the call from their old family friend that told her he had gained consciousness, was alert and apparently making a miraculous recovery, and for her to bring his clothes so he could be transferred, she immediately skipped her day of classes and rushed to the dojo to gather his belongings to bring them. She pushed the button and as the doors slid open, stepped in.

On the ride up to the ICU, Kaoru was filled with ambivalence, with equal measures of both eagerness and dread. She was happy that he was alive and getting stronger but also wondered if her father's ordeal would mellow him out or at least change him to some degree. _Anything would be an improvement_ she reasoned ruefully as the doors opened and she stepped out.

At the nurses' station she was greeted with a bow by the head nurse who smiled a welcome. Politely, Kaoru returned the bow and then headed to Unit 5, her recent home away from home as she had spent as much time as she was able at Koshijiro's side. She was glad as she saw through the glass portal that Dr. Gensai was in with him in deep discussion so she took a deep breath, squared her shoulders and entered the room. She noticed that both men had intense expressions on their faces, the doctor stern and resolved and her father angry and tense. As she came in whatever conversation that had been taking place had instantly halted.

Dr. Gensai smiled a warm greeting as he said brightly, "Ahh, Kaoru-chan. It's good to see you this morning. Isn't it, Koshi-san?"

Kaoru approached her father, sitting up in the bed with trepidation. She put the bag down and greeted him. "Ohayo, Otou-sama," she said softly with her head bowed.

Koshijiro nodded looking at his daughter and again marveled at how much she resembled Kiyomi now that she had matured into a young woman. Like her mother, Kaoru had a radiant beauty that came from more than her delicate features and slender shape. Also like his wife, inside she had a resilience that made her a paradox, just the right mix of strength and fragility. Which was the main reason why she had mastered the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu so swiftly and made him so proud.

"Ohayo, Kaoru-chan," he said in return as she glanced up in surprise expecting a grunt at the most as he always did when she spoke to him.

Kaoru bowed again as Dr. Gensai spoke up, "Well, I'll leave the two of you for now." He then spoke directly to Koshijiro, "I'll be back to check on you later." He then patted Kaoru on the shoulder and took his leave.

There was an uncomfortable silence as father and daughter stared at each other, both seemingly afraid to speak. Breaking her inertia, Kaoru bent down to retrieve the suitcase she had brought and propped it on a chair.

She placed the luggage side down and opened it, rattling off the contents, "I went and got your clothes otou-sama, including your grooming items. I made sure there was enough for your stay at the Center. I'm glad you're well enough to be discharged."

"I'd rather be going home," he snorted.

Kaoru sighed, "I know. But this is best. Gensai-sensei said you need further treatment you can't get here. You have to leave the hospital and go somewhere."

"Hai, but not to my dojo," Koshijiro grunted. "It's totally absurd that I be sent there, I feel fine." He folded his arms obstinately.

Kaoru responded patiently, "Otou-sama, onegai listen to reason. You were in an accident because you were intoxicated. The law against drunk driving requires that you be in a treatment program or get your driver's license revoked. Do you want that to happen?"

"Iie," he replied in sullen resignation.

"Then you must comply," she stated with finality. She then smiled in encouragement as she went on. "It's only for a month, and it will go by fast."

"A month!" Koshijiro exclaimed. "Have you any idea how much revenue I'll lose in a month? Who's going to conduct the lessons at the dojo? I won't have any income and I'll have to refund the students who pre-paid." He scowled darkly. "Kuso!"

Kaoru sighed again as she reached for her father's hand to reassure him. "Otou-sama, I'm certain that your students will understand. And," she paused for emphasis, "I'll take over giving lessons while you're laid up."

He studied her closely as he pointed out, "You'll have to be at the dojo daily, you know."

She nodded. "Hai."

"And you'll have to go to Maekwa's to conduct my lessons there," her father directed. "Are you sure you can do all that and continue with your classes at the university?"

Kaoru was silent as she contemplated the work that it would take to keep the dojo running and to continue her studies. More than anything she wanted to be a commercial artist but family duty and honor had to come first. Promises were made and to break them would cause her family supreme dishonor. Her father would lose face among the other dojos and that would be a disaster. So her mind was made up.

"Hai, Otou-sama. Just trust me and believe in me." She spoke with quiet conviction.

Koshijiro's face remained impassive but he surprised his daughter as he squeezed her hand and said gratefully, "Arigatou, Kaoru-chan."

Not knowing quite how to respond Kaoru became flustered as she blushed. "I have to go now. I'll be back later." She reached in to give her father a peck on the cheek and then scurried out.

On her way to the elevator Kaoru was stopped by Dr. Gensai. "Kaoru-chan, have you--," he began but she anticipated his request and nodded as the doors opened and admitted her.

"Don't worry, Gensai-sensei. You can depend on me."

A few hours later Kaoru was pulling into the empty space in front of her apartment and after parking the car, climbed the stairs to enter. She was surprised to see both Misao and Kenshin seated on the sofa instead of at classes in the middle of the afternoon. Both shot up to their feet to greet her.

Misao rushed over with an energetic hug. "Kaoru-chan, how're ya doing?"

Kaoru managed a weak smile. "I'm okay. I just left my father, he's awake now."

Kenshin had flanked her and laid a hand on her shoulder. "Are you really okay?" His violet gaze was penetrating and Kaoru lowered her head at its intensity.

"I-I'm hanging in. My father was just told after waking up that on Friday he would be getting out of the hospital and---,"

Misao made a sound of relief. "Whew, am I glad to hear that! Now you can get back to normal around here. Spring break's next week and you can come back to Kyoto with me, we could--," she was cut of by Kaoru's firm statement.

"Misao, I'd love to but I can't. I have to run the dojo and give the lessons to the students. My father is not coming home." Kaoru turned her back and grasped her shoulders momentarily and then turned back to address her two friends. "He's going right to the Mental Health Center detox unit when he is discharged Friday."

Misao and Kenshin both became silent as they watched Kaoru brush the rivulets leaking from beneath her lashes. She smiled tremulously as she sought to reassure them.

"Relax minna, I'm glad really. This means he'll get the help he needs. So I don't mind at all covering the dojo."

Kenshin protested, "But surely your father has an assistant sensei at the dojo."

"He does," Kaoru answered, pointing a finger at herself. "Me."

At the duo's surprise, she giggled and continued, "I've been trained since childhood to one day be the successor to the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu. But I wanted a different career which is why I'm going to school and my father has been against it."

Kenshin's eyes lit up with understanding. "So that's why you know so much about strategy and tactics. No wonder a little slip like you was one of my toughest opponents." It was true, whenever they sparred, Kaoru always gained the upper hand in the match and put him immediately on the defensive. Even when he won which he did frequently, it was always a hard victory.

Kaoru made a face at him while Misao said in mock outrage, "Himura, you baka that was a really sexist thing to say. I never pegged you as a chauvinist."

Kenshin blushed and sputtered to make it up as Kaoru leaned over and said sweetly, "You're not exactly built like an ozeki yourself." She grinned and gave him a meaningful look.

The diminutive redhead grinned back as he countered, "Understood."

Kaoru sighed and then announced, "Anyway, I have to head over to the administration building and let all my professors know why I won't be at classes for the next month. I'll probably have to go to summer classes to make them up." She reached in her jeans pocket for her car keys and headed for the door.

Kenshin met her there and asked, "Mind if come? I need to stop by the radio station and get my schedule."

"Sure." She opened the door and headed out with him following. "Later, Misao."

They walked over to the Celica and entered the vehicle. Once inside, Kaoru inserted the key in the ignition but then just sat there with a frown gripping the steering wheel staring through the windshield and contemplating her upcoming future. Kenshin watched her and then reached his hand to place it on her shoulder.

"Are you really okay, Kaoru?" his voice was infused with warm concern.

Brought back from her musings, she gave him a smile and replied, "Of course." With no further word she turned the key and started the engine to drive off as he removed his hand and said nothing else.

At the administration building, Kaoru parked the car and she and Kenshin both exited, with him crossing behind the vehicle and coming to her side. She was surprised and then pleased when he took her elbow to escort her inside.

As they headed into the lobby, Kenshin stopped at a display of paintings and admired the various pieces. He then was caught by the painting on the third row, second from the right.

"That's Misao-dono!" he exclaimed as he studied the painting, and was drawn to the vitality that sprang off the canvas, the perfect depiction of the subject herself.

Kaoru nodded as she said offhandedly, "Uh-huh. I had a hard time keeping her still long enough to really do her justice."

Kenshin eyed her in wonder. "You did that picture?" He glanced at the signature and saw "Kamiya" scrawled in the lower right-hand corner. He gazed at her with warm violet orbs and said, "You're very talented."

Kaoru blushed under his regard, pleasured by his approval of her work. "A-arigatou, Kenshin," she murmured.

He continued to study the piece and said, "And you're going to drop classes for a month. With a gift like yours I think it's a mistake."

She sighed, "I have no choice, Kenshin. I have to keep the dojo running and can't do both. But I'm not dropping all of them, I plan to continue in that class."

"Good," Kenshin said, relieved. He then inquired, "Which class is that one?"

"Portrait painting," Kaoru answered. "But I want to keep that one, I really love it. I haven't even begun the major project yet and I should."

"Oh? What is it?" he wanted to know, then his smile of interest faded when his eyes fell on something else. The atmosphere became tense and subdued as Kenshin's manner noticeably darkened.

Kaoru was concerned at his sudden reticence until she saw what now had his eye. To the left of the art display was an In Memoriam, which was dedicated to the memory of Yukishiro Tomoe. It was the beautiful photograph of her from her service and a sprig of silk white plum blossoms with the kanji reading "Never Forgotten".

Kaoru came over and was transfixed by the longing and deep sorrow she saw in the amethyst orbs of the man as he stared at the photo, the cross shaped scar on his cheek standing out all the more. She watched as he absently fingered the scar as he sighed deeply, lost in an agonized reverie of that terrible night.

She laid a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Kenshin, are you okay?"

He shook his head then turned to her and pasted a smile on, his umbrella. "Don't worry Kaoru, I'm fine." He turned away and said brightly, "I'm going to the radio station so I'll see you later, okay?"

"Sure." She turned and headed to the administrator's office but before she did she saw Kenshin hesitate a bit longer, staring again at the photo of his lost love. She watched him, her heart constricting as she spotted a telltale gleam of a tear in his eye. She sighed softly, grieving with him. . . .

Later as she was in her room, Kaoru was sitting at her drafting table going through her notebook to see which assignments she had left to complete before taking her leave from classes. That afternoon in the administrator's office her advisor, who happened to be Omura-sensei tried desperately to make her change her mind but she was adamant and so he backed off. But he did manage to convince her to keep his course and assured her that even though she would not be able to attend his classes, as long as she did the assignments and the major project, he would not give her an incomplete. So she agreed and kept the portrait painting class, while taking a leave in the rest of her curriculum.

Kaoru sighed as she thumbed through the notebook and saw that there were maybe three assignments that she could complete and pass in before Friday, which was the last day before spring break. The rest would have to be made up during summer classes when she made up the time lost. She sighed again, not relishing the idea of going to classes during the summer but with her family's present situation and her obligations it really could not be helped. She then came to the page with the scribbled instructions for the major project for Omura-sensei's portrait painting course. She decided that it would be the one major assignment that she would work on while running the dojo.

As she studied the brief directive, Kaoru pondered over whom she could paint, whom in her life she could capture in a specific color. Many came to mind, Misao, her father, Tae, Dr. Gensai, who was like a grandfather to her. Then the vision of agonized amethyst eyes, eyes that could penetrate any wall that penetrated _her_ wall appeared to her like a spectre.

Since what had happened in the lobby of the administrative offices this afternoon, Kaoru had thought constantly about Kenshin and the pain he still bore yet tried so valiantly to hide. She was aware of how the past week he had been so attentive to her and the ordeal with her father that she had forgotten that her dear friend was bearing his own burden of grief. But in his eyes that afternoon she had seen it, the vast well that hid the inner turmoil, the tempest of self-loathing, pain, and fury that he kept buried deep inside.

Kaoru bit her lip as she stared at the words of the assignment . . .**_a portrait of someone close to you, a family member, a close friend, or significant other. . . tell through the portrait what color that person represents. . .get into the person's very essence, their soul if possible. . ._** **_to capture different emotions of the subject to reflect the color you chose, a compilation that depicts your subject in that color. You may make the painting monochromatic but use the color as a basis to express and describe the essence of the subject._**

Kaoru thought again of the man named Himura Kenshin, the gentle and sweet man who had been the stabilizer of her crazy life of late. She mused about how he had taken care of her, urging her to eat when she had no appetite, how he called frequently or dropped by to check on her in between hospital visits while she agonized over her father's condition. With no hesitation he offered comfort, affection, and friendship in the midst of his own suffering. In doing all that he had succeeded where others before him had failed, he had scaled her wall. But in spite of all that she knew he was still in deep pain, still blaming himself for Tomoe's death. And that had become his own wall, a barrier that kept even Kenshin himself out._ But will he allow me in? _Kaoru asked herself. _And if he does, am I ready to allow myself to get close to another and risk the chance of being hurt? I've kept myself safe since Okaa-san died and haven't been hurt by anyone but am I ready to allow myself to experience the pain of seeing one I care for pining for someone else?_ With a gasp, she realized that she had grown to care deeply for the redhead in a way she had never felt for anyone else before and the thought terrified her.

The answers for her questions were not easy and as she mulled over the pros and cons, she became aware above all that painting him was something she really wanted to do. So resolved, she closed the notebook and got ready for bed. She snapped off the light and climbed into bed. . . .

Tomorrow, she would ask him.

**NEXT…..CHAPTER 6…..DESSIN…..BRAVELY GOING ON**


	6. CHAPTER 5 DESSIN BRAVELY GOI

_Author's Note: Sorry for the delay in updating but now that "A Bright Future" is finished, this story will be updated quicker. And a grateful thanks to winter acacia for her insight—because of that I expounded on the development of this chapter and therefore a plot device that is coming up to add to the angst will be in the next chapter instead of this one. Pace is important it should neither be too fast nor too slow but I realize I rushed the previous chapter so I slowed the pace and allowed for the relationship between Kenshin and Kaoru heat up and to set the stage for the upcoming angst. There may be some citrus flavor fluff coming up but I make no promises. Thanks to all the readers and reviewers and thanks to a new reviewer, infidelMaki, who has reviewed four chapters recently I'm glad to have your input._

**_Glossary of Japanese _**

**_Dansu—--dresser or bureau_**

**CHAPTER 6…..DESSIN…..BRAVELY GOING ON**

It was mid afternoon on Thursday and the university campus was especially busy, bustling with its student body rushing to turn in midterm assignments or to go to midterm exams, depending on their majors. The air was crackling with excitement over the arrival of Spring Break with everyone getting last minute academics done before the next day when most would be departing for a week of well deserved R & R. All but Kaoru, who at the moment was concerned with turning in the assignments she had promised when she informed her professors and instructors of her leave of absence. She was making her way through the throng to get to her black and white photography class and pass in her portfolio.

Two hours later it after 5 PM when she left the photo department studying the grade score sheet she received for her work up to midterm and was experiencing mixed feelings. Pleasure for the high 90's grades she pulled down and disappointment that due to her difficult home situation, she would not finish out the term. Her instructor, Shimata Fumiki, a professional photographer whose work was showcased in the faculty exhibit in the bottom foyer of the arts building had been very unhappy about her decision and told her so but Kaoru was adamant. So Shimata-sensei said nearly the same thing as Omura-sensei, that if she wanted, she could just fulfill the assignments and pass them in.

The raven haired girl was humbled by the offer but turned it down with regret, saying that running the dojo she would have little time to spend on doing the assignments until her father returned to resume his role as shishou. So to encourage her to continue taking pictures, Shimata-sensei made the offer of access to the dark room, whenever she needed it and gave her a key. Kaoru accepted the gesture with gratitude as she bowed and left.

Head down, she was still marveling over the way Shimata-sensei was dismayed by her impending leave and did not notice that she had wandered to the adjoining building and found herself right in the hall of the studio of the campus radio station. She had been oblivious until her progress was halted as she ran right into a firm figure who grasped her by the shoulders. Startled, she tore her eyes off the page and found them locked into the warm violet gaze of Kenshin.

He grinned as he said, "Hey there Kaoru. What're you doing here?"

She returned the smile with a delicate blush staining her smooth cheeks as he slowly and reluctantly removed his hands. "Gomen Kenshin. I-I was over getting my midterm photography grade sheet and I was distracted as I left and got pushed with the crowd and ended up here." She looked around and saw the picture window that was the view to the radio studio where a fellow with a head of unruly ebony waves wearing a Jim Morrison and the Doors T-shirt was sitting before the soundboard. She then realized that she had ended up in the radio station. She shrugged and added sheepishly, "Everybody's rushing around before Spring Break."

"Aa, I know. Everybody but me has already bailed for break. I have my broadcast now and then I'm covering for Sano who's already split and after that, we go off the air till after next week 'cause the university's closed."

"Oh," Kaoru said. "So after you finish tonight you're heading home to Kyoto for the week?"

Kenshin shook his titian head. "Iie, Hiko's not too happy with me now, not that he ever is jolly but he's especially pissed at me now."

Kaoru bit her lip as she said hesitantly, "Because of the accident and totaling your car?"

A shadow passed over Kenshin's eyes as he nodded, "Aa, among other things. He called last night at the apartment and told me that although the accident was investigated and I was cleared of any charges, because I drove the car before I fixed the brakes the accident is really my fault and he refuses to buy me a new car. And the dean's office called and told him I'm on academic probation so he told me I either get my grades up or he's not paying for the fall semester, so you can say I'm pretty much out in the cold with him right now. So while Sano and Megumi are in Hakone with the other kids, I'm staying at the apartment all week and I'm gonna be looking for a part time job to earn some cash and buy some wheels."

Kaoru's eyes were soft with sympathy. "Gomen nasai Kenshin, I had no idea you were on academic probation. It sounds like things aren't going so well for you."

His expression remained troubled for a split second before he broke out into a smile as he placed his hands on her shoulders again and leaned in to plant a kiss on her forehead. "Arigatou aka-chan, for listening to me gripe. It's really not as bad as I made it sound."

The young man in the Doors T-shirt interrupted the sweet exchange. "Hey Himura, it's almost airtime," he announced, peeking out from a heavy wood door near the window of the studio.

Kenshin groaned as he released Kaoru's shoulders and apologized. "Sorry, I gotta get moving. You gonna be at the apartment later?"

"Aa, all alone," she answered. "Aoshi and Misao left after the morning classes and headed to Kyoto. I have no classes tomorrow so after I pick up and take my father to the mental health center, I'll head over to the dojo so I have to finish packing."

Kenshin said in a melancholy tone, "So you're moving out, huh?"

Kaoru gazed at the man who managed to steal her heart and she shook her raven ponytail. "Iie, I'm just taking clothes and some of my art supplies to the dojo while I'm staying there so I can work on an assignment for portrait class. Which reminds me," she said shyly. "I have to paint someone's portrait with a color as the theme."

He smiled warmly as he commented, "Sounds interesting."

"Aa," Kaoru said nervously as she plunged on. "Anyway, I was wondering….that is if you don't mind….would…would you let me paint you?"

Kenshin was surprised as he asked, "You want to paint a picture of me?"

She bit her lip again. "U-uh-huh. Would that be okay?"

Kenshin stood there speechless as he gazed at her with his amethyst eyes, shining in the fluorescent light of the studio hallway suspended in the moment which made her even more nervous. They stood before each other for an indefinite period as if frozen in time.

The guy in the T-shirt came out again and said in urgency. "C'mon Himura! The last commercial's almost done!"

"Okay, okay I'm coming." Kenshin then replied in a whisper for Kaoru's ears only, "I would be honored to have you paint me."

He then leaned in, captured her face in his cupped hands and took her mouth in the softest of kisses then released her and disappeared behind the door of the studio where a red light stating "DO NOT ENTER" immediately illuminated. Over the speakers, Kenshin's tenor was a husky purr that spoke to his audience:

"Hey everybody out there, how's it going? Everybody getting ready for Spring Break after exams or out partying celebrating the end of half the semester? This is your own rurouni Kenshin and I'll be taking you to the midnight hour as the party rolls on. So let's kick things off with a song I'd like to dedicate to a good friend and very special lady and you know who you are." He gazed through the glass at Kaoru meaningfully.

"Lady" by the group Styx began drifting through the speakers as Kaoru saw Kenshin smile and boyishly throw a kiss from his seat at the soundboard. Her heart pounding she felt herself blush as she waved coyly then whirled and made a quick exit. . . .

…………………………………………………………….

The next day was Friday and as Kaoru rose and showered to prepare for the day ahead she could not help but have a feeling of foreboding as she dreaded the upcoming events. Today was the day she had been dreading for a week after she had learned of her father's situation, the day she was to take her father to MHC for treatment. Dr. Gensai had filled her in on the detoxification treatment at the MHC and she was reluctant to see her father needing such extensive care. But he did need it so she accepted the fact and prepared for the month he would be away from the dojo, informing the students and rearranging the lesson schedules both in and out of the dojo.

Turning off the water, Kaoru exited the shower and wrapped herself in a big towel then with another towel dried her long raven tresses, rubbing vigorously. She reached for her detangling brush and began to brush her wet hair when the phone rang.

Sighing as she quickly wrapped her hair in a towel, Kaoru hurried to the kitchen wall to answer it. "Hello?"

The warm tenor at the other end of the line replied, "Ohayo, Kaoru."

She smiled and blushed in spite of herself. "Ohayo, Kenshin, how are you?"

"I'm fine and was wondering about you. You're heading to the hospital to pick up your father soon, aren't you?"

"Uh-huh. He's getting discharged at about 10 and we have to be at the MHC before lunch." Kaoru continued towel drying her hair, cradling the phone against her ear with her shoulder.

Kenshin said, "Look, I was thinking since I don't have classes that I could go with you." He then added hastily, "That is if you want me to."

Kaoru was touched. "Oh Kenshin that's very sweet of you to offer but I think I'd better go alone. My father is the kind of person you take in small doses if you don't know him. And I really don't want him to hassle you about our friendship."

"Would he really do that?"

Kaoru replied, "I'm pretty sure he would. I've not had many male friends or boyfriends and the few I have had all got the third degree from him. I just don't want him to start pumping you with a lot of personal questions and embarrassing us both."

Kenshin said warmly, "I could handle him, aka-chan. But if you'd rather I not go along, that's okay." A short hesitation then he asked, "So where will you be after he's all settled in?"

"Probably at the dojo. I packed after classes last night and I'll be loading my car before I leave to get my father so I might as well just go over there. Why do you want to know?"

"Well-l I just figured that I'd come over to see you if you were still at the apartment," he said in a somewhat bashful manner. "I-I mean we could talk about the painting," he added quickly which made Kaoru smile.

She answered in a soft voice, "Well, if you want to, you can come to the dojo. It's right near the river and not far from the bay. Kamiya Kendo Dojo is on the front gate near the street so it's easy to find."

"Great," Kenshin said, enthused. "I have Sano's car because they took Megumi's new RX-7 to Hakone so I'll drop by about 4. Is that okay?"

Kaoru felt a warm rush of pleasure course through her as she said, "Uh-huh, that would be fine."

"Okay, see you then."

"Right," Kenshin said. "Take care of yourself, Kaoru-tenshi."

She blushed again at his use of the endearment. "I will, bye."

"Bai-bai."

About an hour later Kaoru was pulling into the parking lot at Tokyo General and as she killed the engine she took a deep breath to brace herself for seeing and dealing with her father's attitude about being discharged to the MHC instead of his home. He had called her just before she left the apartment to harangue her about the plan of his discharge but she stood firm in support of Dr. Gensai's order and he grudgingly acquiesced as he hung up abruptly on her. She sighed deeply as she whispered a little prayer for strength and patience as she exited the Celica and then made her way toward the large cinderblock building.

As she walked to the entrance, she passed the sakura trees where she and Kenshin had lingered beneath that one time a week ago that were now lush with green leaves. She stopped momentarily as she recalled the conversation with her close friend and how at that time she truly yearned to be a sakura blossom with a life too brief for pain. But then she realized the wisdom of Kenshin's words that made it through the grief-stricken fog in her mind and thanked Kami above for his support and friendship which had become a bulwark in her life. What a change a few days had made as she was secure now in the knowledge that whatever unpleasantness awaited her with her father, she was no longer facing it alone and with that, squared her shoulders and strode forward to the front door of the hospital.

Kaoru walked through the lobby and entered the elevator to go to the ICU, her mind focused on the objective of staying her ground in the face of her father's stubbornness and as the door opened to the floor she girded herself for battle. The nurses at the center station all smiled and bowed as she passed and headed to Unit 5.

Inside, Koshijiro was already dressed in a pair of khaki pants and a casual shirt and sweater, seated on the bed with a scowl on his hawk like visage. He was appearing like an unruly child that was sulking because he was being forced to do something that he hated and if not for her apprehension, Kaoru would have burst out with a giggle. But she remained neutral as she entered and addressed her progenitor.

"Ohayo, otou-sama," she said in a subdued, respectful manner, bowing.

Koshijiro grunted as he responded, "Did you bring more of my clothes?"

"Hai," she replied as she went to the closest to retrieve the rest of his belongings. "They're in the car."

"Humph!" her father grunted again as Dr. Gensai entered the room with a smile of greeting. He addressed the two cheerfully.

"Ohayo, Koshi-san, Kaoru-chan. Are we ready to go?" He was followed by a nurse pushing a wheelchair who, once in the room waited by the door.

Koshijiro cast a jaundiced eye at the conveyance and snorted, "Gensai, you can't be serious. I don't need that damned thing, I can walk."

Undaunted, the portly doctor insisted, "Sorry but hospital policy is that all patients that are discharged be escorted out in a wheelchair. Especially those who are recovering from injuries like yours."

"I didn't break my legs."

"But you have broken ribs and that qualifies you for a wheelchair escort so stop complaining and get into the chair."

Koshijiro grumbled but complied as he plopped down into the wheelchair, and glanced around for his daughter, who was wisely standing out of his line of sight for a good reason, she did not want to be the next victim of his vituperative comments. But her reprieve was short-lived as he bellowed for her.

"Kaoru, let's get the hell out of here," he ordered as the nurse pushed him out into the hall and carrying his suitcase, Kaoru followed. . . .

Twenty-five minutes later, they pulled up to the neatly manicured grounds of the Mental Health Center of Tokyo or MHC the main center for treatment of various mental and emotional disorders as well as the treatment of chemical and alcohol dependence. The front grounds were designed in a manner that made the center appear as a resort of sorts, with wooden benches scattered among flower beds and a koi pond with deciduous shade trees flanking the perimeter.

"How kirei," Kaoru commented as they drove past an area that had several patients sitting on the benches with facility staff nearby overseeing them.

Her father sat sullenly and said nothing as they cruised to the parking lot and Kaoru pulled into a vacant spot near an atrium where other patients were sitting. She parked the car, turned off the motor and turned to him.

"Otou-sama, it's time to go." She opened her driver's side door and exited the vehicle to go to his side and assist him. He irritably pulled away and snapped a retort.

"Leave me be! I can get up and walk by myself." He hoisted himself up and out of the car as sighing, Kaoru reached in the backseat and retrieved his luggage. Gathering the bags, she slammed the door and followed Koshijiro as he strode to the front of the facility.

The lobby and reception area was cheerful in its décor, the walls a warm pale peach with snapdragons and gladiola arrangements scattered about on tables that flanked some Chinese styled armchairs and a sofa on a patterned carpet spread over a highly polished wooden floor. There seated were several residents with staff overseeing them. The left of the lobby led out to the atrium that Kaoru and Koshijiro passed as they came into the MHC building.

Once inside, the two approached the reception desk and Kaoru smiled politely at the woman manning the desk. "Ohayo gozimasu. I am Kamiya Kaoru and this is my father, Kamiya Koshijiro. We are expected."

The receptionist smiled as she consulted a card file and pulled out a card. "Hai, his room is ready. It is on the third floor, west wing, room 345."

She picked up the phone and summoned an orderly and a man with a wheelchair arrived. He gestured to Koshijiro who snorted in derision.

"I don't need that contraption. I can walk on my own." He rudely swept past the orderly who stood there silently as Kaoru bowed, apologizing to the man.

"Gomen nasai."

Hearing her Koshijiro scoffed imperiously, "He is owed no apologies, Kaoru. Just take me to where I must go." He stopped at the elevator and waited with a regal bearing.

Kaoru murmured another apology as the orderly bowed shortly and left with the chair. She sighed resigned, as she picked up her father's belongings and went to the elevator as the door slid open to admit them. . . .

The third floor, west wing was painted a warm beige color and appeared like a hotel floor the only difference being the nursing station, an island that was centrally located and cordoned off by a walnut panel that surrounded it. There were flower arrangements at each end and a desk telephone for use of the patients for outside calls. Kaoru and Koshijiro both approached the station.

Again Kaoru smiled and bowed politely as she said, "Ohayo gozimaru. I'm Kamiya Kaoru and this is my father."

The head nurse smiled and bowed as she responded, "Hai, we've been expecting you. Please come in here to sign some releases and then we'll show your father to his room."

She pushed a button and the panel slid open to admit Kaoru and her father in where they sat down and then signed various forms and releases typical of being admitted to a treatment facility. That being completed, the nurse then rose and led them out of the station and into the hallway and addressed Koshijiro.

"If you'll please follow me, I'll show you to your room, Kamiya-san."

He just grunted and he did as he was bidden and carrying his bags Kaoru followed. As they made their way down the hall, she took note of the setup, which was airy and cheerful not at all like she expected. The nurse was cheerful as she led them to an end room with a southern exposure with sunlight flooding the room with light and warmth.

"How nice this room is," Kaoru said as her father cast a dispassionate eye around and grunted. She sighed and then said to the nurse, "Can you show us around the floor?"

"Of course." She smiled as she headed out and turned to say, "Onegai again, just follow me."

She led them through the floor pointing out the community dining area where meals would be served, and then to a sunny dayroom where there was a television and a shogi board on one side of the room. The other side had comfortable overstuffed chairs and a davenport with cushions, flanked by standing lamps and end tables with stacks of magazines. The few patients that were there were gathered in chairs before the TV, watching a sitcom rerun.

"This is our dayroom where we have organized activities twice a day, in the morning after breakfast and the afternoon after lunch. In between treatments that is," the nurse explained.

"Humph," Koshijiro grunted. "I suppose that I'll be required to join in."

"You'll be encouraged to do so but not required," the nurse relayed as she guided them out and down the corridor to another room. She opened a door to a gymnasium and said, "We have a full gym here for you to use but the equipment is locked up and you'll need to let us know when you want to use it."

Again Koshijiro made a disparaging sound as he sniffed, "Afraid the crazies might try something, huh?" Kaoru shot him a look as she became embarrassed by his audacity.

The nurse responded, "We just want to make sure our patients stay safe. Your goal here is to get well and go back home."

Koshijiro answered with alacrity, "That is my goal."

The nurse smiled, "Good, then since we're in agreement I'm sure your stay with us will be pleasant."

They ended up back at his room as she finished the tour. She then informed them, "Lunch will be served in about twenty minutes. If you need anything, please use the call bell." She pointed to the cord and button wound around the rail of his bed, then bowed and left.

Kaoru turned to her father and commented, "This seems like a very nice place." She scanned the room, noting the way it was decorated to be as unassuming and cheerful as possible. She also noted that there was a private full bath with a tub and shower and added, "Looks like you'll have everything you need."

"Aa," he scoffed as he said caustically, "All the comforts of home."

Kaoru sighed as she pointed out, "Otou-sama, it's only for a month. If you make the best of it, it'll go by fast. And you won't have your driver's license revoked."

"Okay, okay," he said irritably as he sat on the edge of the bed, his back to her.

Kaoru sighed again as she opened his suitcases and began to put away his clothes, carefully hanging his shirts and trousers in the closet and putting his other things in the drawers of the dansu. She did her task in silence as her father sat sullen and brooding. Soon she was finished, storing the suitcases on the closet shelf. She then slid the door closed and stood there trapped in the uncomfortable silence between her and her parent.

Koshijiro turned and fixed her with his own ultramarine orbs, dark and accusatory as his displeasure hit her like radioactive waves, burning her and pushing her to the brink of changing her mind. But visions of her father, drunk every night as he attempted to climb inside a sake jug strengthened her resolve so she stepped to him and leaned in to take his hand, which he responded to with a cold glare and slapped her hand away.

"Leave me alone. Just get out." Rudely, he turned his back to his only daughter and rose from the bed to go into the bathroom, slamming the door.

Her heart aching with the new wave of rejection from her father, Kaoru picked up her purse and exited the room, heading for the elevator. Her eyes were blurry with tears welling up and did not even respond when the head nurse said good-bye to her, she just walked into the elevator and let the doors slide closed. . . .

Twenty-five minutes later, Kaoru wearily pulled into the narrow driveway at the alley that flanked the dojo walls where she and her father parked their cars, and turned the key to shut off the engine. She then sat in the silent vehicle and stared ahead, her father's cold anger causing a chill inside that had her feeling like a traitor, that she had betrayed him. That alone was causing unending waves of pain that pulsated through her. Unable to hold them in any more, she burst into tears.

Kaoru cried, her tears flowing unchecked as she pounded the steering wheel in abject frustration. "Kuso, Kuso, Kuso! Why does he do this to me? And more, why do I let him? Kuso!" she railed as fury at her father grew.

She laid her head in her arms over the steering wheel and cried as if her heart was rented to pieces, the emotions of the last week finally catching up with her. She was overwhelmed at the unfairness of the situation, that she had to put her own life and aspirations on hold in duty to a man that was cold and selfish, just because he was her father.

The sun had made its way over to the western sky, bathing the courtyard in gold and orange light and Kaoru was still in her front seat as emotional exhaustion overtook her and she had dozed off. Her impromptu nap was halted when the sound of someone knocking on the window startled her to wakefulness and her head popped up.

Kaoru turned her head and saw Kenshin's smiling visage as he waved so she rolled down the window to greet him with a wan smile.

His own smile faded as he saw the evidence of her despair, written in the tracks of her tears, down her pink cheeks and in the way her ocean eyes were swollen and still watery. He leaned closer and asked in gentle concern, "Are you okay, Kaoru?"

"Oh hi Kenshin," she said with assumed cheeriness that belied her haggard appearance. "I forgot that you were coming over." She rolled up the window and then reaching for her purse, opened the door to exit as Kenshin offered his hand to assist her.

He then took her elbow as he said, "I'm afraid to ask this but how did it go with your father?"

She gestured to the dojo porch, near the storehouse and as he led her there she replied, "Not well. He's not happy about being there and of course he took it out on me. He's so unreasonable." They both sat down as she continued, "The only reason he's agreed to go to MHC is because the law demands he get treatment for the drunk driving charge. But that doesn't mean he accepts it, he hates the idea."

Kenshin remarked, "Well, you can't blame him really. Nobody wants to be in a place like that, away from home. And I'm sure he's worried about his dojo."

She sighed in irritation, "I know. But I've rearranged my whole life for him to make sure he has no worries and can concentrate on getting well. You'd think he'd recognize that instead of making me feel like I've betrayed him." Her eyes welled up again in sheer frustration, drawing Kenshin's instant concern.

He wrapped his arm about her slumped shoulders as he murmured comfortingly, "It'll be okay, aka-chan. MHC is a top facility and he's getting the best care now. And afterward, who knows? He might even be kinder and gentler. After all, you are his only daughter."

Kaoru gave an unladylike snort as she said bitterly, "A lot of good that does. Ever since my mother died, it's like I've been the enemy. If he changes his attitude towards me it'll be a miracle 'cause I know he still blames me for her death."

"But you had nothing to do with your mother's death," Kenshin insisted. "It's totally unreasonable for him to blame you." He became outraged by nature of his frown and the color of his eyes, which became icy blue.

Kaoru noticed his demeanor and inside it gave her a thrill to know that he was supportive and seemed to want to protect her and that she finally had someone who cared. She snuggled closer to the warm circle he provided as she said, "I can handle it. After all, I've had to since I was five."

"Aa but that doesn't make it right," Kenshin pointed out. "You're someone he should be proud of and his daughter and he should cherish you."

Kaoru pulled away to gaze deep into his eyes and she was shocked to see the depth of emotion swirling within them. She was filled with gratitude and something else as she impulsively reached her lips to his scarred cheek and planted a kiss.

"Arigatou," she whispered as she moved back slowly and saw that the atmosphere between them became hushed. She then noticed the sun had sank lower and the courtyard was filled with fireflies, gently blinking as they fluttered about and her heart began to pound.

Kenshin himself was affected as he leaned closer and his own mouth slowly captured hers, teasing her lips to part and bid him entrance. Kaoru moaned softly and complied, as her arms snaked about his torso and she melded against him. The kiss deepened yet remained gentle as his tongue now explored her orifice as his hands slid through her hair in a caress. Kaoru felt as if she were on the highest mountain and had sprung wings to soar into the golden clime, carefree and overjoyed as her senses suddenly came to life.

They drew slowly apart and words were at a loss as amethyst locked with sapphire like two forces drawn to each other by gravity. His hand then reached to her cheek and ran up it in a feather soft caress as he replied, "You're quite welcome."

They remained in a state of suspended animation for an indeterminate time when the phone ringing inside snapped them both back to the present. Kaoru became nonplussed as she stammered, "Excuse me, I have to get that."

Kenshin just nodded as she got up, unlocked the door and hurried to the wall phone by the practice hall.

"Kamiya Kendo Dojo, may I help you?"

After her conversation Kaoru hung up the phone and then went into the practice hall to the reception desk and switching on the light made a notation in the schedule book for a lesson on Monday morning for one of her father's regular students. She then made an entry onto the blackboard for the young man's lesson in the morning session, making the class number to fifteen, a large group. She then glanced at the lesson plans and saw where her father had left off so she could continue. She had become so engrossed in the plan with her mind already devising a continuation of what her father had been teaching that she did not notice that someone had joined her. Startled at the shadow that fell over her shoulder onto the lesson planner, she jumped up and whirled to find herself face to face with Kenshin.

He was as startled by her sudden move as she was and jumped back with an exclamation. "Oro!"

Kaoru had never heard an expression like that so she covered her mouth and giggled as she said, "Forgive me, Kenshin I didn't mean to startle you. And I didn't mean to forget about you."

He recovered his aplomb and said with a grin, "That's okay. I'm sorry I startled you but I had wondered what had happened to you so I came in to look for you. Is everything okay?"

"Uh-huh. One of my father's students just called to switch his lesson to Monday is all and as I changed his time I got involved reading my father's lesson plan."

Kenshin nodded as he glanced about the hall. "So this is the practice hall of the dojo, huh? It's really great, plenty of room to do katas and spar."

Kaoru beamed with pride as she nodded and explained, "Uh-huh, this dojo has been in my father's family for generations." She brightened up as she suggested eagerly, "Would you like a tour?"

"Sure," he said just as eager as he let her by and placed his hand on the small of her back and they exited the hall. . . .

Kaoru took Kenshin through the entire dojo, showing him the entire complex, to the personal rooms like the parlor to the kitchen and dining room and finally, the sleeping quarters and she pointed out the chambers used to house students that boarded there.

"These are rooms for students to stay. They have beds and dansus with a community bathroom at the end of the hall. My room's here too." She slid open a shoji and flipped on a switch illuminating a room that was painted robin egg blue and scented lightly with her scent of jasmine.

Kenshin had an unreadable but placid look on his face as he perused the interior of a Kaoru's room, with lithographs of Japanese watercolors and photographs on the walls. But what really caught his eye was the corner where several blue ribbons for championships in kendo were hung, most first level.

Impressed he said, "Wow, those are really something." He leaned in and noticed that the ribbons were from years before the most recent being last year. "I see you won the regional last year for this prefecture."

"Aa," she said nonchalantly.

Kenshin came to her and asked softly, "So how come you didn't bring them with you when you moved in with Misao?"

His mesmerizing eyes pinned her as Kaoru sighed and replied, "Because the swordsmanship is a part of my past, something I want to leave behind as I go forward." She stepped away from the wall and added, "The kendo was supposed to be something I outgrew but thanks to you I'm back at it."

Kenshin smiled as he said, "Your skills are extraordinary, Kaoru. Our kendo team needs someone like you so I'm really happy that you've joined us."

"Aa," Kaoru said. "And that's why even though I'm not going to be taking my classes, I'll still be on the team. I won't let you guys down."

"You'd better not," Kenshin said in mock severity. "Or our captain Saito might come after you and then I'll be obligated to knock his block off to protect you." Eyes twinkling, he grinned evilly as he quipped, "Come to think of it, go ahead and screw up because if he comes down hard on you, I'll be happy to have the excuse to knock his block off."

Kaoru giggled as she felt a warm rush of pleasure at his desire to champion her. She then gestured to go back out in the hall and a sudden impulsive idea came to her. But she hesitated thinking hard as they chatted and she led him back to the common area by the door.

Sounding reluctant Kenshin said, "Well, thanks for the tour but I should be splitting. I need to grab a bite and then I have some laundry to do."

"Laundry?" Kaoru was incredulous for she had never heard of a man doing laundry. As her father had drilled into her, laundry was women's work and she was the one that did not only their own laundry but that of any students boarding at the dojo. For that reason it became a chore she loathed.

"Sure," he said with a grin. "At home Hiko had me doing laundry and cooking."

"Really?" Kaoru was discovering that the redhead was chock full of surprises. She then brought up her idea that she had earlier as shyness took over.

"Uh, Kenshin?"

He raised a brow. "Huh?"

Her heart pounding she felt like she did when she asked if she could paint him "Uhhh, I was thinking since you're going to be alone all week and you don't really have any plans…. that maybe you'd like to stay here at the dojo," she said meekly then finished, "with me."

His eyes widened to violet saucers as he said in surprise, "You want me to stay here with you?"

Kaoru lowered her head as she nodded and she inwardly cursed her impulsiveness _Kaoru you baka! What's the deal with this, you're inviting him here to stay with you alone? Have you lost your mind? And what must he be thinking?_

His hesitation prompted the next statement as she hastily said, "L-look, you don't have to, I just thought---," but her words were halted by his finger gently on her lips.

Kenshin smiled a warm smile as he said, "I can't think of any place else I'd like to spend Spring Break. And besides, we can start your painting project. So let me go back to the apartment and grab some things and I'll be right back."

He then leaned over and kissed her, his lips warm and firm as he turned and exited, causing Kaoru's heart to pound. A soft smile graced her lips as she turned to prepare a room for him.

**NEXT…….CHAPTER 7….GLAZE…..CALM BEFORE THE STORM**


	7. CHAPTER 6 GLAZE CALM BEFORE THE STOR

_Author's Note: Here's the infamous filler bridge to the next tragedy that will cement the bond growing between Kenshin and Kaoru. I had to end it here because the next part cannot be rushed to maintain the continuity and impact that will establish mutual pain of tragic events that will forge a deep relationship and if I continued this chapter would have been about twenty pages and it's thirteen now. And after receiving a review that made me see the two as a bit more OOC than I wanted I wrote the first scene to portray Kaoru's incompetence in the kitchen and tried to have both her and Kenshin be more in character (thanks Adelaide). And a huge thanks to all the readers and reviewers and especially sergee (yes, you can use Kaoru's mother's name in your own story) and Summer39 whose reviews put this story at 70 reviews and it's not even half done._ _And there is fluff with a citrus flavor with probably more to come but nothing too extreme so enjoy._

_**Glossary of Japanese and kendo terms**_

_**Gomen nasai---I'm sorry**_

**_Minna---Everybody_**

_**Subarashii---Wonderful**_

**_Kirei---Beautiful_**

_**Tenshi---Angel**_

_**Aka-chan---Baby (A loving term)**_

**_Satsujin-ken---Swords that bring death_**

**_Katsujin-ken---Swords that bring life_**

**_Hitikake-geiko---_** **_sparring practice where a senior kendoist guides a junior kendoist through practice. _**

**_Ji-geiko---_** **_sparring practice where the kendoist has a chance to try all that he or she has learned with a resisting partner._**

_**Battoujitsu---a sword style that is based on the rapid drawing of the blade with godlike speed---Kenshin's specialty which is why he's called "Battousai."**_

**GLAZE…..CALM BEFORE THE STORM**

An hour later, Kaoru was finishing preparing a room for Kenshin that happened to be located right directly across from hers. She was feeling rather ambivalent about her impulsive invitation, now wondering if she had made the right decision to ask a man to stay at the dojo with her. And even more so, a man to which she was realizing she had grown a deep affection. Although the dojo was roomy, the sleeping quarters were close and with that fact Kaoru knew that thoughts of nature taking its inevitable course would run rampant. That idea alone sent a deliciously naughty thrill through her as she put the finishing touch on setting up his futon.

After smoothing out the last wrinkle, Kaoru sighed and patted the futon, then rose to her feet just as she heard the sound of another vehicle pulling into the alleyway by the dojo. She took a deep breath to calm her fluttering heart as she went to the hallway and heard a soft knock on the shoji.

"Come in Kenshin, it's open," she called as he entered, carrying a duffel bag and some books. He favored her with a smile as he placed his belongings down.

"Hope I didn't take too long. The traffic from the university over here was heavy, it took me almost a half an hour to get from my apartment here."

Kaoru reassured him, "Iie, you're fine. But I figure you must be hungry so I was about to order pizza." She lowered her head sheepishly as she added, "I'm afraid I'm not a very good cook."

Kenshin reached over and squeezed her hand. "That's okay. Show me the kitchen and I'll fix us dinner."

Kaoru just gazed at him incredulously and then shook her head. "That's right, you told me that you cooked at your home."

"Aa. So just point me to the kitchen and let me get to work," Kenshin said cheerfully as he took her elbow and they headed down the hall to the kitchen.

The kitchen was a large, cavernous room that had a fairly good sized gas stove, a stainless steel refrigerator, a dishwasher and in the corner, a washer and dryer. In the middle there was a preparation island with various sized utensils hanging around it along with an array of copper and stainless steel pots and pans including a wok. Cupboards and counters with a stainless steel sink rounded out the room. Spices and oil were located on a shelf at the back of the stove.

Kaoru stepped to the refrigerator with a dubious expression, the kitchen being another place she felt foreign. All her life, and as she grew into young womanhood attempts at learning the fine art of cooking had met with failure as her father, never a patient person, tried to teach her. But the attempts were futile as she remained as unskilled as ever and so cooking as well as laundry were tasks she avoided when at all possible.

With a sigh she opened the appliance door and peeked inside. "I don't know if my father had done any shopping before now. I had gone to the grocery store the weekend just before the accident so there may not be much." She reached in and removed the milk container to open and sniff the contents, wrinkling her nose as it appeared sour. "This milk has gone bad."

She went to the sink to dump the contents as Kenshin peered into the refrigerator and made his own observations. "Looks like everything in here's okay. I see tofu and some vegetables in here." He then opened the freezer and saw frozen meats and fish so he reached in and brought out some boneless chicken and placed it on the island top, along with the tofu, some broccoli, mushrooms, and onions. He turned and grinned as she tossed the empty milk container away and faced him.

"I have plenty here to do a stir-fry so I'll fix us dinner. Just tell me where the rice is and I'll get right to it."

Kaoru saw the amiable expression on her friend's handsome face and her heart began to pound again. She replied, "I'll get the rice and start that." She reached in a cupboard and pulled down a large plastic container filled with rice as Kenshin popped the chicken in a pot of hot water to defrost it. She then took another pot and partially filled it with water to set on the stove for boiling. Kaoru then turned and watched as Kenshin proceeded to take a knife and cutting board to chop the vegetables and cube the tofu humming as he worked.

Soon the water was boiling and so Kaoru added two cups of rice, stirred and lowered the heat, covering the pot. Then she turned and watched as Kenshin began to season the wok with a teaspoon of oil. Once done, he turned on the flame of the burner on the stove and dumped the vegetables and tofu into the heated pan, shaking it to evenly brown them. He then reached into the sink to extract the chicken.

Dismayed, Kaoru stated, "It's not completely thawed yet."

But Kenshin grinned at her and said, "It doesn't matter, aka-chan. Partly thawed is all I need."

He then took the chicken and with a deft twist of his wrists with a knife, chopped the breasts and added them to the simmering vegetables in the wok. Taking some ginger and garlic spice, he sprinkled the mixture liberally as he shook the pan immediately sending a tantalizing aroma into the air.

Kaoru was mesmerized as she watched and then an idea hit her. "Be right back," she rattled off as she fled the kitchen, leaving Kenshin with a rather bemused expression on his even features wondering why she had left. A few minutes later, she returned with her camera in hand.

Kenshin protested, "Kaoru, you're not going to take my picture now, are you?"

She replied, "Aa, why not? I have to get different shots of you for the assignment so why not now?" She raised the camera to her eye, focused and tripped the shutter.

Kenshin shook his head chuckling as he agreed, "Okay." He went to stir the contents in the wok as he asked, "You want me to pose for you?"

"Iie," she said. "Just pretend I'm not here, I want you totally natural."

"Okay."

Kaoru continued to take shot after shot, getting Kenshin as he continued to finish cooking their meal, trying not to be aware of the camera pointed at him. She smiled as she captured his concentration and drive all laced with a cheerful manner, displayed by his constant humming. She felt herself become enchanted by the domestic picture he presented to her viewfinder and was so engrossed in tripping the shutter she forgot about everything but her subject….

Until…

The smell of something burning wrinkled her nose and she glanced up, becoming alarmed at the smoke poring from the pot of rice. With a shriek she put the camera down on the counter and rushed to the stove where Kenshin was already there trying to run damage control. Turning down the heat under the wok, he turned off the rice and took the cover off to see if anything was salvageable. But it was too late, the rice had burned into a brown paste onto the pot. With a potholder, he took the pan off the burner and brought it to the sink.

"Whew, we'd better run some water in this or the pan's history," Kenshin stated as he ran water into the smoldering pot, sending plumes of steam toward the ceiling.

Kaoru stepped beside him, biting her lip. "I-I thought I had put enough water in there. I guess I was wrong." She hung her head in dejection as she watched the steam billow up. She went on wryly, "If my father were here, he'd have hit the roof and made me replace the pot."

But Kenshin did not lose his cheer. "No big deal. I think we got it in time to save it. So just relax." He released the handle and took hold of her hands to reassure her.

Her head still lowered in embarrassment, Kaoru felt deeply shamed by her blatant ineptitude in the kitchen, a place that was a focal area in the home life of the typical Japanese woman. But Kaoru was not a typical Japanese woman and that caused her duress at times, especially when her father would get angry with her frequent failures. Her downcast face was hidden by her overgrown bangs and she felt her eyes well up. But then she felt a gentle touch as Kenshin took hold of her chin and raised her eyes to meet his.

The warm amethyst orbs bathed her in comfort as his thumb brushed away a stray rivulet and then he spoke softly, "There's no need to shed tears over some burned rice, that there isn't." Kenshin smiled a sweet smile and his eyes crinkled.

Like the appearance of the sun after a summer shower, Kaoru's eyes dried up and her face broke into a smile. "A-arigatou."

His smile fading Kenshin murmured, "You're so pretty when you smile, Kaoru. I wish I could make you smile forever."

At his words her heart began to pound and as before in the courtyard, time stood still as their lips drew together in a soft, sweet kiss. They then drew apart and embraced fully as everything else in the world vanished. Then Kenshin cradled Kaoru's face as he sought another kiss.

Kaoru moaned as her arms snaked under his, pressing herself deeper into his circle of security as his mouth ravaged hers in a tender storm of passion. At the same time, his hands laced through her midnight tresses, freeing them from the indigo ribbon that held them bound. The ribbon fluttered to the floor as the silky mass then cascaded down below her shoulders and acted as a veil that Kenshin buried his face in as he suckled her graceful neck. Waves of pleasure broke over Kaoru and she felt as if she were at sea and the warm surf was crashing over her.

However, it was then Kenshin who broke the spell, slowly drawing away and saying in a husky tenor, "I have to finish cooking our dinner." He stepped back and went back to the stove as Kaoru stood there in a daze just staring. . .

Twenty minutes later they were in the dining room and seated on cushions both wordlessly eating the meal, their minds on their hearts wishes displayed in harmony, which served to make Kenshin and Kaoru pensive and intensely aware of each other. Conversation was stilted and after the meal they both cleaned up in relative silence. As Kaoru dried the last dish and handed it to Kenshin to put away, she finally spoke.

"I'm going to go to bed early tonight. I have to get up early and pick up the laundry from my father and bring him some fresh clothes, they don't do the laundry at MHC for short term patients." She started to leave but Kenshin grasped her arm to detain her.

"Kaoru," he said softly his eyes apologetic but she held a finger to his lips.

"Don't please," she said quietly. "If you're about to ask my forgiveness, don't. Because there is nothing to forgive." She headed to the door and said as an afterthought, "If you get your things, I'll show you the room I got ready for you. It's right across from mine."

Kenshin nodded and followed her out. . . .

After retrieving his belongings, he went with Kaoru as she led the way to the sleeping quarters and stopped right at the shoji across from the room she had pointed out before as being hers. She flipped the light switch and the lantern wall sconces illuminated the room where a futon was centrally located against the wall and the comforter turned down.

Kenshin lowered his duffel bag and said gratefully, "Arigatou, Kaoru. This is a very nice room."

She smiled and nodded as she replied, "I put you in the room across from me because there isn't anyone else boarding here now. Besides that, I'm usually all alone in this section, my father's room is on the other side. He prefers to be far from me so he can drink all he wants without feeling guilty about me and my disapproval." She gave a bitter laugh that sounded somewhat like a sob.

Kenshin turned and gazed at her but she shook off the air of melancholy as she again pasted a smile on her face and said brightly, "Well, I'm going to bed so please make yourself comfortable. If you need anything I'm right across the hall, okay?" She headed to the doorway and before she stepped out, he came to her and grasped her hand.

"That goes for you too, aka-chan. If you need me, I'm right here. Sweet dreams." Kenshin squeezed Kaoru's hand and then disappeared behind the shoji as he slid it closed.

Kaoru stood outside the door for a moment as she felt and pondered as the warmth of both the offer and the residue of his grasp on her hand lingered until she finally vanished behind her own shoji for the night.

……………………………………………………………………….

The next day, Kenshin was in the kitchen again, this time cleaning up after fixing breakfast for Kaoru and himself, insisting she eat before heading over to MHC to see her father. She had seemed preoccupied and to be dreading the visit so he had offered to go with her but she declined the offer, saying that it would be better if she went alone. So off she had gone, leaving him the breakfast dishes, which he did gladly.

As he rinsed the dishes and loaded the dishwasher, Kenshin mused about the sweet enigma that was Kaoru. In the brief time he was with her in her home environment he took note of one very clear fact. Whatever the relationship between her and her father was, she was quite adept at subjugating her true feelings and often retreated behind her wall when it was apparent that they were surfacing. This disturbed him as he could see how maintaining the façade put a strain on her in the way she just sat staring at nothing at all then dismissed her emotions with a bright smile. He shook his head as he recognized that he too had the same tendency, which was less apparent as he himself maintained an overall cheery manner, especially when annoyed. Except after….Tomoe.

_Kaoru-tenshi, we are alike in many different ways_ he mused as he reflected on his own devices of coping to keep from falling to pieces.

After he finished, Kenshin then decided to stroll about the dojo, to take in the surroundings and investigate the place that Kaoru had grown up. He started with the practice hall, a large sparse room that was unadorned by any furniture save the budusan situated at the front of the room where a family scroll adorned with delicately painted sakura stood sentinel over a floral arrangement and a ceremonial sword, sheathed and on a stand. Kenshin came to the area and knelt as he read the kanji on the scroll, which was a prayer to the samurai, indicating the Kamiya family heritage and dojo was forged during that golden age in Japanese history. He bowed his head in respect and said a short prayer.

He was still there an hour later when the front door slid open and Kaoru's soprano called out his name. He smiled as he responded and following the sound of his voice she entered the practice hall. She approached and knelt beside him.

"You doing some meditation?" Kaoru wanted to know as Kenshin stared at the scroll, drawn in to the intricate brush strokes of the sakura that surrounded the kanji.

"Aa."

His attention was still on the scroll to which Kaoru explained, "That scroll was painted by my grandfather. In addition to being a samurai, he was an accomplished ink painter, which is probably why I paint. When I was a small child I would sit here for hours and just stare at the scroll and when I got older, I used to sit in front of it and try to copy his work." She shrugged and said ruefully, "But I could never get it just right."

Kenshin turned and said with a smile, "But you must have inherited his talent because your work is incredible. Your painting of Misao was excellent and so life like."

Kaoru lowered her head as she responded, "Arigatou, but I made so many mistakes with that one. I'm surprised Omura-sensei wanted to display it at the administration building."

Kenshin gazed at the raven haired girl and his heart warmed at her apparent modesty at the awareness of her gift. However, in her demeanor he saw that her self depreciation was genuine, she really did not think her work was exceptional when it was this occurring from feelings of low self esteem arising from her difficult family life. It just made his desire to get closer to Kaoru deepen further and he found himself honored that she had chosen him as her next subject. But as he continued to surreptitiously watch her, he could see a strain apparent that he ascertained was the residue from her visit to see her father.

"So," Kenshin asked. "How'd it go with your father, Kaoru?"

She bit her lip and shrugged as she replied, "Just as I expected. He barely said two words to me and so I put his clothes away, took the dirty ones, and left." Kaoru rose to her feet with a sigh.

Concerned, Kenshin jumped to his feet and grasped her elbows. "Are you okay?"

Like quicksilver she changed her demeanor and flashed him a smile as she nodded, "Hai, you don't have to worry about me." She turned and headed to the door with him in tow then stopped as an idea came to her.

"Listen, I have an idea. It's such a nice day, let's go for a walk to the river and I'll take some more pictures of you. How about it, Kenshin?"

Slightly embarrassed he shook his head as he protested, "What about the ones you took last night?"

Kaoru hastily explained, "That was just the beginning. I need at least three rolls of shots to get you at different times and light to capture every facet of you before I can paint you." At his discomfort she grinned engagingly and coaxed, "It's part of the assignment so how about it?"

Kaoru's face held a poignant mixture of hope and assumed cheer, like she was working hard burying the hurt of the visit with her father beneath the created veneer. It made him want to cry to see the pain of Koshijiro's rejection evident in her sapphire orbs that she could not quite hide and he did not have it in him to reject her as well. Kenshin smiled as he nodded in assent.

"Okay, let's go."

A quick trip to her room to change and pick up her camera and they were off. . . .

Both clad in jeans and T-shirts they headed out the rear. After locking the dojo up Kaoru led Kenshin through the rear gate of the courtyard and they walked a wooded path down to the riverbank. They carefully picked their way through the overgrown rushes and down the embankment to where the river's edge flowed by in a silvery rapid, glittering in the afternoon spring sun.

Kaoru gazed about in delight as she remarked happily, "Ohh what a perfect day! It's almost as warm as summer."

Kenshin chuckled as he commented, "Indeed it is, Kaoru-tenshi."

His eyes were infused with both the warmth of the sun and the inner warmth of the intense, personal feelings he harbored for the beautiful girl with him and they were like lilacs. His voice was soft like a caress and a delicate blush came to her soft cheeks as she became a bit flustered by the combination. Unnerved by his manner, Kaoru put her camera down on a tree stump and to release her own pent up emotions stretched her arms up to the cerulean clime, relishing the warm rays that enveloped her like a lover's embrace. Kenshin could not help but smile at the scene and his heart began to pound as he imagined the taste of her sun-warmed lips on his. He approached her with a fond smile.

"So what do you want me to do first?"

Into her craft and in her element, Kaoru picked up her camera and aimed it at him. "Just move naturally. I especially want to capture your eyes in this sunlight."

"Okay," Kenshin said as he complied, feeling somewhat awkward as her shutter clicked one shot after the other. He was at a loss what to do so he strolled down to the river's edge with Kaoru following as she kept taking his picture.

Kenshin looked right at her as he stated, "I have to admit, I really don't know what to do." Both took a seat on the grass by the riverbank, side by side.

Kaoru answered as she continued shooting, never missing a beat, "Just sit there and let your thoughts flow. I want to capture your moods so just daydream, today's the perfect day for it."

_Just daydream, huh? _He stared up into the sky at the cotton ball cumulus clouds that floated on the blue backdrop and his thoughts floated along with them. Kenshin's eyes then clouded as he remembered the last time he had been in a place on a similar day like this, daydreaming. It was nearly identical except it was fall and the leaves were falling from the trees instead of in the fresh green bloom of spring. And another raven-haired beauty was with him. The memory was early in their relationship…

_**They had just finished raking leaves at Hiko's, his stepfather having ordered the task done and leaving them alone for the rest of the day. Kenshin had done the job grudgingly at first, regretting having to burden his girlfriend with the chore, but Tomoe had cheerfully lent her assistance, assuring him that once the task was completed, they would be able to have some fun together. They had the job complete and were about to burn the leaves when like a little girl, she had jumped into the pile, giggling. He protested halfheartedly as he gave in and they had a leaf tossing battle that ended up with the two of them covered in dried foliage and in a fit of laughter. But the close proximity combined with the intense feelings both shared for each other resulted in a passionate embrace as they came together in a kiss.**_

_**The kiss was deep and full of intense wanting as Kenshin's mouth drank deeply of Tomoe's sweetness. As they drew apart, Kenshin had found himself mesmerized by her sable eyes and her scent of white plum. Bemused by the combination and what emotions it was invoking, he lay in the pile of leaves deep in thought about what he wanted to do with her and she nudged him in the ribs to get his attention.**_

"_**Hey are you there?" Tomoe asked, one silky brow arched as she leaned close.**_

_**Kenshin was staring off at the fluffy white clouds in the sky and savored the fragrance of white plums that lingered on the breeze. At her query he turned his thoughts into action and his attention toward his pretty girlfriend so he cupped her face in his hands to draw close for another sweet, searing kiss. **_

_Tomoe_ he said to himself, his heart aching and his eyes faraway as he began to miss her yet again. . . .

Noticing his subdued manner, Kaoru lowered the camera from her eye and gazed directly into his face. Her concern rising, she inquired, "Kenshin, are you okay?"

But he was still locked away in the near past, his eyes darkened to violet by the apparent grief and loss. Saddened by his anguish, yet drawn to the naked emotions swirling in his orbs, Kaoru lifted the camera and took some more shots of Kenshin then felt a twinge of guilt feeling that she was exploiting him by taking advantage of his pain. So she lowered the camera and rose to her feet, holding out her hand to him.

"C'mon, Kenshin," she said brightly.

Slowly he raised his head and said, "Huh?"

Kaoru favored him with a sunny smile and replied, "Come with me, I want to show you something."

Taking her hand, he rose as well, his eyes now puzzled as he asked, "What is it?"

Without a word she just led him further down the riverbank to a patch of irises, an indigo wave undulating in the warm zephyr, surrounded by rushes. There Kaoru released Kenshin's hand and putting down her camera went down to crouch among the blooms, her raven tresses shining with blue highlights in the sun and blending perfectly with them. Kenshin could only stare as the sight dazzled him, sending all other thoughts fleeing.

She gazed up at him and said, "These irises were planted here by my mother, when I was born. She used to bring me here a lot before she died and told me that she planted them because they were the color of my eyes."

"Kirei," he murmured as Kaoru leaned down to let the flowers brush against her nose and cheeks. Taken by the fetching picture, he picked up the camera she had set aside when she went to sit in the patch of irises. Smiling, he raised it to his eye.

Curious, Kaoru raised her hand to her eyes to shield them from the bright rays and glanced at her friend. "Kenshin, what are you doing?" she asked as the shutter tripped.

He snapped another shot as he replied, "Oh, just capturing this beautiful picture on film so I can always remember it."

Kaoru blushed as she stammered, "I-I'm the one that's supposed to be taking _your_ picture."

But Kenshin chuckled as he rejoined. "So why can't I take yours? Maybe I'd like a picture of you." He snapped another shot as she got to her feet and approached him to retrieve her camera. "Now that's a real action shot."

"Okay, that's enough give it back." She reached for the device but he teasingly held it back and out of reach as Kaoru placed her hand on his shoulder and stood on tiptoe to try to get it.

Grinning, Kenshin wrapped his right arm around her waist as holding the camera his left arm was extended just out of her reach, bringing the two of them face to face. Because of the exertion, Kaoru's cheeks were flushed and her petal pink lips were less than an inch from his. Unable to resist the temptation he captured her mouth with his and as the kiss deepened, he lowered his other arm and encircled it about her shoulders, dropping the camera onto the soft, overgrown grass. Then gently as if in slow motion, Kenshin and Kaoru joined it as they lay among the rushes locked in each other's arms. The sun moved from its zenith toward the western sky before the young couple stirred from their embrace. . . .

His tongue probing, Kenshin's hand ran across Kaoru's supple, surrendered body, caressing her as it traveled beneath her T-shirt and over her full breasts, sending thrills through her like the aftershocks following an earthquake. And as he sensed her arousal he felt his own heat rise as his body responded in kind, sending him into dizzying heights as pleasure rippled through him. Kenshin's hands worked deftly as he reached for the clasps on her bra and nearly succeeded in freeing her bosom but Kaoru, feeling the assault and her resistance weakening began to withdraw, pushing against his chest to separate from him, much to his chagrin.

He spoke softly, moaning her name as they broke apart breathlessly. "Onegai Kaoru-tenshi, you're so beautiful. There's nothing I want more in this world then to love you so why don't you let me."

Gasping, Kaoru protested weakly, "But Kenshin we shouldn't, not here." She sat up slowly and conscious of her dishevelment pulled her shirt down as he too sat up and ran a shaky hand through his unruly titian locks as he came crashing down to earth.

Shaking himself back to awareness he murmured in disappointment, "I-I guess you're right. I lost my head, forgive me?" He rose to his feet and offered his hand to help her up.

She rose and nodded as she bent down to retrieve her camera. "W-we'd better head back to the dojo. The sun will set soon."

He nodded as they both began the walk back to the dojo wordlessly, the interlude at the river both uppermost in their minds as they reached the courtyard gate. Kaoru opened it and they entered the courtyard and walked slowly to the rear porch of the dojo. Climbing the few steps they stopped and turned to each other, their eyes speaking words their mouths could not.

Kenshin reached and brushed a stray ebony strand from Kaoru's eyes as he opened his mouth to speak but like last night, she laid a finger on his lips and shook her head. She then took his hand and together, they entered the dojo.

…………………………………………………………………………………

The next day the dojo was busy with the first of three classes as about a dozen young men were gathered in the practice hall following Kaoru in hitikake-geiko as they moved in unison with grace and agility. Kenshin sat on the side and watched as she led them from one exercise to the next and he could not help but feel a measure of pride in her expertise. It made his heart lighter since the atmosphere between them after what happened yesterday at the river was strained and tense making him wonder if it was wise for him to stay at the dojo, even for just Spring Break. He could not help but brood about the event from yesterday.

Last night as they finished the rest of the stir-fry, both he and Kaoru barely spoke, and retreated to their quarters as they both thought about the interlude at the river. He especially felt a mixture of guilt and regret as until then the furthest their relationship had gone was the occasional deep kiss and even then they usually covered up any display of passion with mirth as they both skated the issue of their attraction to each other. But yesterday's session by the river seemed to bring all the pent up and carefully hidden feelings to the surface and as much as they enjoyed what happened it both confused and disheartened them both. These thoughts gripped Kenshin until he was shaken from his reverie by the ending of the class.

"Yame!" Kaoru cried out as the class stopped and bowed to her as sensei. She dismissed the group, "Okay now we will continue learning the succession technique next week. For the rest of the time, I want you to choose a partner for sparring."

The boys nodded. "Hai, sensei." They all paired off and began energetic ji-geiko as she walked over to where Kenshin was sitting and took a seat beside him.

He looked at her with a smile as he remarked, "That's quite a good group there." He gestured to the gathering as he added, "The techniques are really different from the others we use on the team. What style is it again?"

Kaoru replied, "Kamiya-Kasshin Ryu. It was created by my great-grandfather during the end of the Bakumatsu when he was an Imperial swordsman. It's a form of katsujin-ken, swords that give life and the moves are created to defeat an opponent instead of killing him."

"I remember you telling me about it," Kenshin said as he watched the sparring matches between the students. "Although I've seen you use some of the same moves during kendo practice for the team at school, this is the first time I've seen it practiced fully, I'm impressed."

At that moment, a quarrel broke out between two boys and a shouting match was taking place so with a sigh Kaoru jumped up and hurried over to quell the disturbance. She got between them and reprimanded the boys as Kenshin joined her.

"All right now I want an explanation. Why are the two of you arguing?" Kaoru wanted to know.

One boy replied sullenly as the other held his head down. "Gomen nasai, sensei but he started it by making an illegal move against me, attacking below the belt."

"Iie, iie," the other boy protested glaring at his opponent. "He lies, sensei. It was him that attacked below the belt first."

"Did not!"

"DID too!"

"All right stop!" Kaoru exclaimed hotly as she pierced both youths with icy sapphire orbs. "I don't care how it started, just apologize. Now."

Kenshin asked, "Excuse me, but what was the move that started the fight?"

The latter boy glanced at the man with the red hair and cross shaped scar and answered as he stared at Kenshin, "It was a form of satsujin-ken and is illegal even in practice."

The other boy protested irately, "It was not---," but his words halted as he stared in recognition at Kenshin. "I know you, I've seen your picture in the sports page, you're Himura Kenshin, the Battousai, the top kendoist on the University team."

The other boys heard the statement and abandoned their kata to crowd over and gape at the man whose reputation in kendo circles all over was renown. They began to shower the bemused Kenshin with adulation.

"No kiddin' the Battousai? Here?"

"Wow, is it really you?"

"Wait till I tell my father, we were at your last match, Himura-sama. You were so awesome."

"Can I have your autograph, Battousai?"

"Are you here to teach us some of your battoujitsu moves?"

Completely bowled over Kenshin glanced above the excited boys' heads at Kaoru who was stifling a giggle as he tried unsuccessfully to bring them to order. He held his hands up to calm the youths down.

"Maa, maa. Onegai minna, I'm just here to visit with Kaoru-sensei," he insisted but another boy spoke up.

"Won't you teach us at least one move?" the youth beseeched with wide eyes. The rest of the boisterous group chorused their approval as Kenshin glanced at Kaoru helplessly.

She smiled reassuringly at him as she addressed the group, "Okay, okay break it up now minna, class for today is over. We'll see you next week."

The boys all moaned in disappointment as they all turned to leave except for one who remained to ask, "Kaoru-sensei, will Himura-sama be here next week?"

She glanced over at her friend and began, "Well--," then as an idea hit her she replied, "we'll see. Now go and change so you can get picked up."

"Hai sensei."

The boy bowed and jettisoned as Kaoru watched him and then smiling with a speculative gleam in her eye at Kenshin she asked casually, "Have you found a part time job yet, Kenshin?"

He shook his head as replied, "Iie, not yet." Curious, he inquired, "Why do you ask?"

Kaoru pinned him with her direct azure gaze and said, "While my father's laid up, I could use an assistant during classes. How about it?"

Kenshin blinked in disbelief as if he had not heard right. "You're offering a job to me?"

Kaoru nodded, "Uh-huh. I usually assist my father and with him gone I need the help." She added sagely, "Besides, the kids are so impressed that the Battousai is staying with me they'll be sure to come to class if they know he's my assistant."

Kenshin lowered his head modestly as he scratched the back of his head. "I'm not sure of that, Kaoru-tenshi." He then smiled warmly as he said, "Your own skills are exceptional and I'm sure they know how fortunate they are to have you as their sensei."

Kaoru shrugged dubiously as she stated, "Maybe but you need a job and I need an assistant so what do you say? Will you do it?"

Kenshin looked at the expectant and hopeful expression on Kaoru's lovely face and the thought of spending every day with her as she ran her father's dojo was like a wonderful surprise. And now he felt that staying with her would have some legitimacy as a paid assistant because since yesterday especially he had felt a bit guilty. His even features broke into a slow grin.

He nodded, "Hai, I'd like to work here, very much." His grin faded as he added, "But when school starts next week, I'll have to get back to my classes, the radio station and kendo practice."

She pointed out, "I'll have kendo practice too, remember I'm still on the team even if I'm not in class." She continued eagerly, "We can spar right here between classes and matches."

Her exuberance warmed his heart as he saw rare but genuine joy in her so he wanted to make it last as long as possible. He chuckled, "Okay, okay, I'm sold. You've got yourself an assistant."

"Subarashii!" Kaoru cried as she impulsively hugged Kenshin much to his surprise and pleasure as her scent of jasmine wafted into his nostrils. Grinning he returned the hug and was beginning to savor her closeness when she suddenly pulled away, her expression faded.

Concerned again by her mercurial change he grasped her by the elbows and asked, "Kaoru, what's wrong?"

"Kuso, I forgot," Kaoru said with dismay. "If I hire anyone, I have to have otou-sama's approval first. We'll have to tell him." Her face bore the worry that informing her father of her desire to hire him, which could add even more to an already stressful situation.

Kenshin saw the duress in her as she now was filled with indecision so he sought to alleviate her fears. He flashed a smile as he said, "Don't worry about hiring me, aka-chan. I'll come and help and you don't have to pay me."

But she shook her head, adamant. "Iie, you need to make money to buy a car so I'll see to it you get paid." Kaoru set her chin stubbornly as she said with finality, "And that's it."

Kenshin stifled a chuckle as he snapped to attention. "Hai, Kaoru-dono."

She smiled in satisfaction as she informed him. "Tomorrow, we'll both go and tell him…."

**NEXT……CHAPTER 8...IMPASTO…..TRAGEDY STRIKES AGAIN**


	8. CHAPTER 7 IMPASTO TRAGEDY STRIKES AG

_Author's Note: Okay this is a very long chapter but the pace of events demanded it be so. And the rapid rise and fall of spirits in Kaoru's father is very common in alcoholics—that is why during the treatment for stopping drinking anti-depressants are prescribed because severe depression is commonplace. And it ends as a cliffhanger but the next chapter will be as Kaoru goes on. A very warm and humble thanks to all the readers with 2921 hits and the reviewers, hope you enjoy this. Warning: there is some vivid description of Koshijiro's killing of himself so beware._

_**Glossary:**_

_**Koibito—--Sweetheart**_

_**Koi—--Love**_

_**Koishii—--Beloved**_

_**Anata—--Honey or dear as a wife addresses her husband**_

_**Onegai----Please**_

**IMPASTO…..TRAGEDY STRIKES AGAIN**

The next day after breakfast, Kaoru had begun to put Kenshin to work, having him polish the hardwood floor of the practice hall to a high sheen. He did the task cheerfully and in record time as the first class was at ten. As he worked, Kaoru watched him in satisfaction, her spirits high and she was even more convinced that hiring her friend the Battousai was a great idea. . . .

Meanwhile, over at MHC a solitary figure sat sullenly in a conference room as he waited for what he derisively referred to as "the daily interrogation" of the resident psychologist, a man shown as Magojiro with a typical manner both probing and patient. This was quite frustrating to Koshijiro as he felt himself being as if he was under a microscope, with everything exposed that was once invisible to the naked eye. So any form of subterfuge was not only foolish but futile as Magojiro was relentless in his quest to intrude.

The door opened and Magojiro stepped in, a rather rotund man with a jovial countenance who could be misleading with his jolly manner that morphed into a psychoanalyst with a persistence that would make Freud himself proud. He took a seat in a leather chair opposite Koshijiro and addressed the dojo master.

"Well, ohayo gozimasu, Koshijiro-san." His cheerful salutation was not acknowledged as Koshijiro grunted and nodded.

"And what personal questions that I have no intention of answering are you going to ask me today?" Koshijiro regarded the man warily with narrowed cobalt eyes.

Magojiro chuckled as he replied, "Why are you so afraid, Koshijiro-san? This is all a part of your treatment and your responses are needed to complete that so you may be discharged." He leaned over his desk for emphasis and added, "You do want to return to your home, don't you? To your daughter?"

Koshijiro thought of Kaoru and felt the usual pang of guilt but covered it with belligerence and glared back as he snapped, "This is blackmail! In order for me to return to my home and dojo I have to allow you to freely trespass inside of my head."

"You must be deemed mentally fit to go home," the psychologist pointed out.

"And that is entirely by your determination." Koshijiro looked at the man askance as he added, "Suppose I just pack up and leave, what can stop me?"

Magojiro replied with his eyes steely as he acknowledged the tossed gauntlet, "If you were to attempt that, a call to the police would take place and you would immediately be in custody. Is that what you want?"

Koshijiro glared at him but said nothing, knowing the truth lain before him.

Magojiro sighed, "You know you are required by law to finish treatment here as ordered by the magistrate or be imprisoned for drunk driving. And the discharge papers are to be signed by me."

"Humph!" the dojo master grunted in disgust. "So to sum it up my life is in fact no longer my own and I cannot make decisions for myself."

Magojiro sighed, "Koshijiro-san it is because you made a wrong decision, the one that put you behind the wheel while under the influence that you are in this situation. The law is clear that you must undergo treatment to be free of alcohol and prove that you are not a danger to yourself or others before you can resume your normal life."

"In other words, I have no choice," Koshijiro stated.

"Unfortunately, you do not." The psychologist sat back and opened the file and notebook before him to resume. "And now let's pick up where we left off from yesterday…,"

In the practice hall at the Kamiya Dojo, Kaoru and Kenshin were working together, performing hitikake-geiko with the morning class, a group of eight adolescent boys aged between 13 and 15 years, all on the middle level of skill in kendo. The kata that both were leading the class consisted of datotsu performed from a hasso no kamae, to focus attacks on the upper torso. And as this group of boys were also aware of Kenshin's somewhat celebrity status, the ones he were leading were trying their best to outdo each other to impress their hero.

At the final move, Kaoru called out, "Yame!" to end the exercise and everyone relaxed then crowded around the redhead, all chattering excitedly as once again Kenshin's reputation preceded him. And as usual, the champion swordsman was humble as he accepted the effusive praise and hero worship from the aspiring kendoists.

As the boys crowded around her friend, Kaoru went around and collected the shinai that were tossed about in abandon as class drew to a close, smiling at the chatter and Kenshin fielded questions from the excited throng.

"How was my chodan no kamae, Battousai? I really tried to sharpen my stance."

"I couldn't get the kata right, Battousai. Can you work with me after class?"

"Battousai, can you show us some of your moves? That would be so cool!"

Kaoru smiled as Kenshin tried to maintain order. "Maa, maa. I'll prepare some kata from the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu for the next class but only as an exhibition. You are here to learn Kamiya Kasshin Ryu and my job is to help guide you."

"Awww!" the students' disappointment was evident as Kaoru them took over.

"Okay that's it for today. We'll see you all next week," she said briskly as the boys dispersed and Kenshin ran his hand through his hair. She came to him and laid a hand on his shoulder.

"So did you survive?"

He managed a tired grin as he replied, "Aa. It was pretty challenging. They're a spirited group, I bet Saito would have a fit trying to keep them in line."

Kaoru giggled as she remarked, "Aa, I could just hear him now. And I remember how he hated the idea when I joined the team, telling me that I should just stay in the kitchen and leave kendo to the men. What a chauvinist!"

Kenshin's eyes narrowed as he asked, "When did he say that to you?" He frowned as he became incensed by his adversary's narrow view, feeling outraged for his friend.

"A while back, when I first joined the team." She saw his rising temper and added, "It's all water under the bridge now."

Kenshin snorted, "Well, he had a hell of a nerve to say that. He's only the captain of the team, he has no right to judge team members regardless of gender."

Kaoru saw the storm clouds in the icy blue orbs and she patted his hand. "It's okay, Kenshin. I see the kind of guy Saito is so I just ignore him and follow what Baisotei-sensei says."

Kenshin growled, "Still that Saito is an arrogant ass. I'd like to knock his block off."

Kaoru smiled sweetly, warmed by his desire to champion her. She squeezed his hand and said, "I can handle him, Kenshin-kun. I've come up against his type ever since I began in kendo."

"That may be so Kaoru, but that remark was uncalled for. And if I had heard him say that, I would've called him on it." Kenshin folded his arms and scowled.

Her voice was soft. "Well, I wouldn't want you to get thrown off the team because you were defending my honor. I know the two of you don't exactly see eye to eye."

He gazed at her and covered her hand with his. "Don't worry, aka-chan. Baisotei-sensei has the last word and he reigns in the ookami when he gets to be too much." He leaned close as he murmured, "But if I ever hear him disrespect you in practice, I'll take him down. Nobody disrespects you while I'm around."

Kaoru's sapphire orbs widened as Kenshin sealed his declaration with a soft kiss. She melted into his embrace, dropping the shinei she was holding as the wave of passion overtook them. The bamboo swords clattered to the polished wood as oblivious they rode the torrid breaker bringing them to the place visited at the river. So mindful of that, they both pulled away, panting.

Kaoru glanced at the clock on the wall near the phone and noticed the time. Alerted, she said, "It's almost time for us to go visit my father so we'd better get this place picked up. We'll grab some lunch and then go to see him." She then leaned down to retrieve the shinei and Kenshin assisted her, going about to pick up the discarded goku to store away.

As they worked their way around the hall tidying up from the previous session, Kaoru's eyes fell on the morning newspaper, which she had brought in and tossed aside as class began. She went over to the paper and picked it up to discard when the sports section spilled out.

With an annoyed sigh Kaoru reached down to pick it up when she spotted the feature on the front page. She gasped as she saw a beautiful snapshot of Kenshin in his last match, winning decisively as the caption below read **_Champion Swordsman Bounces Back With Stunning Win_**

Her sharp intake of breath drew Kenshin's attention immediately. He hurried over to her and inquired, "What's wrong, Kaoru?" then saw the photo and article and frowned thoughtfully as he took hold of the paper.

She shook her head as she started to read, totally engrossed in the article. It was more of a human-interest piece on how Kenshin had survived a deadly accident and the tragedy of losing his girlfriend. It had covered his ascension in the kendo championship ranks and how he had mastered battoujitsu with sakabatou for competitions, winning every match so far. But it also covered the poignancy of picking up the pieces of a shattered life. It was an evocative and gripping story that caused Kaoru's eyes to become moist.

"When did you do this?" she asked, stifling a sniffle.

Kenshin replied tonelessly as he stared at the article. "That was done last week but they didn't tell me when they were going to run it. The beginning of the baseball season kind of took over." He glanced at the by-line and commented flatly, "It was written by a friend that usedtowork with Tomoe on the paper."

"I see." Kaoru felt a twinge inside of sight envy and guilt mixed as she remembered recent tenderness shared with a man although affectionate and caring toward her was still grieving the loss of his love, evident in the emptiness that flickered in his eyes. So she took up the role of comforter once again as she took him by the hand.

"C'mon Kenshin," Kaoru said brightly. "Let's go get something to eat then go out to MHC to see my father."

He glanced as her through glassy eyes and smiled. "Hai."

They headed toward the kitchen. . .

At Magojiro's office, the rancorous morning session was concluded, much to the relief of both parties. Magojiro leaned back and wearily rubbed his eyes, never in over 25 years experience in counseling did he ever meet such an obstinate, mule-headed patient as Kamiya Koshijiro. The man was a rock and when he was not being unmovable, he was one of the most disagreeable and bitter men he had ever been in contact with.

"Kamiya-san, once again we have gotten nowhere. You have to do a better job if you want to be discharged. You do want to go home don't you?"

Koshijiro's blue eyes darkened to a stormy sea. "Are you going to continue holding that over my head? If so you're wasting your breath and my time because I will get out of here."

Magojiro leaned forward and said succinctly, "You will not if you continue to be uncooperative, Kamiya-san " He leaned back and said shortly, "We're done for now, see you tomorrow."

He waved his hand in dismissal and it was like waving a red flag before an angry bull. Koshijiro felt his anger rise as he felt slighted and he snapped, "Don't patronize me, you bastard. I am a man and I don't have to do anything I don't want and I can do what I do want." He whirled on his heel and exited the office, slamming the door as Magojiro just shook his head.

Standing right outside he groused _How dare he be so intrusive and try to dig into my family life. It's none of his damned business how my relationship with my daughter is, she hasn't complained._

A voice inside challenged _Oh hasn't she?_

Koshijiro fell into the defensive mode and said back _She has said nothing to me_ as he nurtured his position and remained unmoved.

Now in the outer alcove that served as a waiting area, Koshijiro made to stalk away and storm back to his room but his eye caught the sports page of the daily paper strewn on the chairs lined up for those waiting for Magojiro. Curious, he sat down and took a good look at the picture of the young kendoist featured and saw in the youth's eyes the same fresh enthusiasm and drive that he once had. Intrigued, he began reading the article and he saw that it covered the young man's entire life, mentioning the adversity he had overcome when he survived a horrific automobile crash that killed his girlfriend.

**_When asked how he goes on after the accident, Himura replied, "I just look at each day as itself, with no expectations other than for it. That way, I have nothing to regret if my time is up." He went on to say that he would never forget his girlfriend Yukishiro Tomoe and that he thinks about her all the time. And his eyes tell the true story of anguish unreleased that adds more to the slim shoulders of this talented kendoist…_**

Putting the paper aside Koshijiro felt a pang as his thoughts fell on his own beloved wife, now long gone to the afterlife and in his head he heard the musical laugh and shining eyes that had first captivated him when he was about this Himura's age.

_Kiyomi, it's been almost fourteen years you've been gone and I still miss you. I can relate to this boy and the pain he's feeling, and even kendo can't fill my thoughts all day. I wish you were here with me, koi. Without you my life means nothing and I don't care about anything._

He then recalled his wedding day, the first blissful months of newlywed life and then the excitement when Kiyomi discovered she was pregnant with their first child. Then the fear when as she delivered their daughter, she suffered a cardiac arrest that nearly took her life. She recovered but her heart had weakened and she was never really well as the child grew stronger and she faltered. Koshijiro remembered beginning to feel resentment toward Kaoru and he blamed her when Kiyomi finally succumbed. And that resentment grew as Kaoru did, so he tolerated his daughter's presence by seeking solace in a sake jug.

His thoughts continued _Kiyomi-koishii, had I known that bringing a child into the world would have taken you away from me, I would never have let you go through it, I would have had you get an abortion, and been satisfied to have only you by my side. We could've adopted children and not endangered your life by having Kaoru. _

Koshijiro closed his eyes and then opened them as he heard a familiar voice admonishing him in his misguided feelings for his child. _Koshi-anata, how can you think that? Kaoru is our precious baby, she is a part of the two of us and now that she has grown up, has become a lovely, talented young woman. I'm so proud of her and her accomplishments and you should be too._

He answered in misery _But I can't forget that you almost died having her. And having her weakened you so that you finally did die. _

Kiyomi's voice continued _Anata, that is not her fault. She did nothing to weaken me, it was just my time and I went. But I have been anguished watching these years how you've neglected our daughter._

Koshijiro retorted _I haven't neglected her, I 've worked hard to make her stronger_ but Kiyomi interrupted with the truth and the pang of guilt stabbed his heart once more as he had to face it.

_Hai, you have. But you have withheld affection from her and you've treated her like an outcast in her own home. All for something that is not nor ever has been her fault. That is a shameful thing, anata._

Koshijiro sighed and lowered his head as he admitted _As always koishii, you are right. Kaoru-chan deserved to be loved by me, she is my flesh and blood. And I AM proud of her, she is a skilled swordswoman and a wonderful artist just like my father. And I do love her, very much._

Kiyomi's voice spoke for the last time _Then show her._

_Show her _Koshijiro echoed as he rose slowly to his feet and began the trek back to his room . . .

Meanwhile, Kaoru and Kenshin had parked and were entering the front lobby of the facility. They both headed to elevator and as she pushed the button to summon it, Kaoru bit her lip and braced herself to gird herself for her father's unpleasantness. Always observant, Kenshin saw the distress on her delicate features and placed a caring hand on her shoulder.

"Kaoru-tenshi, are you okay?" his warm tenor was filled with concern and she turned and saw the dual lavender pools that radiated affection like an oasis in a desert. She felt her burden lift immediately for she saw her refuge there.

She reached a hand back and laid it on his with her own orbs filled with tears of gratitude for her titian haired savior. "A-arigatou Kenshin, I'm fine I'm just getting ready to face the coldness that I know is waiting." Kaoru sighed as the elevator door opened and she entered, followed by Kenshin. She pushed the button to activate the conveyance.

As the elevator began its ascent he said hesitantly, "If it would be better for you if I don't come, then I'll go back and wait in the car," but Kaoru shook her head and spoke softly.

"Iie, Kenshin-kun. I want him to meet you and he'll want to meet you when I tell him I've hired you." Her face showed a grim determination beneath the anxiety and again she stole Kenshin's heart. Eyes locked on him, Kaoru pleaded with him. "Onegai?"

He cupped her cheek and said softly, "I promise, aka-chan. I won't leave your side."

Kaoru smiled as they arrived on the floor and the door opened to let them out. Kenshin took hold of Kaoru's elbow to escort her out of the elevator, then as he followed her to the main desk, his hand rested on the small of her back, a very subtle but clear sign that she was under his protection. It remained there as they made their way to her father's room.

Once there, Kaoru got busy, opening the bag of fresh laundry for Koshijiro, and opening the dresser drawers to put away fresh underthings, shirts and socks. That finished, she then opened the closest and began to hang up sets of trousers while retrieving the bag with his dirty clothes. Kenshin stood and watched as she acted the dutiful daughter, making sure her parent's needs were met, another one of the many facades she assumed as she buried the shame and pain.

Kaoru completed the task, sighing as she closed the door and then she commented, "I wonder why otou-sama is so late. He's usually back soon after the session."

Kenshin asked, "What session?"

She replied, "He has to have ten sessions with a counselor to be determined free of alcohol dependence before they discharge him." She grasped her shoulders and strolled to the window to gaze out idly as she continued, "But if I know him, he's probably hating every minute and being extremely difficult."

Kaoru sighed deeply as she watched the clouds meander across the sky, imagining just how obstinate her father could be and she wondered if he would acquiesce enough to satisfy the requirements that would get him back home. Gentle hands on her shoulders and the warm presence of the redheaded man who had become her bulwark during this trying time interrupted her glum musings.

"Kaoru-tenshi, don't worry. If he is like any swordsman, he is a man of honor and will do what is necessary to regain his life. And I'm sure he misses you and his dojo."

Kaoru turned to him with a little wry chuckle. "You'd think so, huh? Well maybe the last part is true but I doubt that he misses me." She lowered her head and hid her eyes beneath the ebony bangs on her forehead.

Kenshin took her chin and lifted her head to gaze directly into her eyes. "I don't believe that not for one moment, that I do not. I think that deep under all the pain of losing your mother, your father loves you, very much. And maybe this ordeal has made that clear to him and he'll be a different man."

Her face lit up with hope. "Do you think so really? Oh, I hope that's true because in spite of everything I love him, very much."

Kenshin smiled tenderly as he said, "I know you do. And I'm sure he feels the same as you."

Feeling like she had been given a treasure Kaoru threw her arms about his neck and hugged him energetically. "Arigatou, Kenshin-kun. I'm so glad you came with me and have helped me so much. I just love you!"

Kenshin was returning the embrace when the unexpected words she spoke hit him like a sucker punch in the stomach. They pulled their heads apart as the statement acted the part of an equalizer and both stared as the three words hung suspended between them.

Kaoru's pretty face became flushed as she shyly stammered, "Oh gomen, I-I mean that I---," but her words were halted as Kenshin's lips claimed hers in a soft kiss. . .

While this exchange was occurring, Koshijiro was making his way to his room, climbing the staircase instead of taking the elevator as he pondered over the words Kiyomi spoke in his head and served to soften his hard heart. Actually he felt great shame as he heard his dead wife's reproach about his daughter echo in his ears and knowing Kaoru was probably in his room waiting for him he felt afraid to face her. He stopped at a window and stared out as he tried to figure out what to do now and in addition to Kiyomi, the session with Magojiro played in his head in unison.

_**"So Koshijiro-san, how is your daughter?" the intrusive counselor inquired as Koshijiro sat there with arms folded, digging in.**_

_**"I don't think that is pertinent to my treatment," he snapped as he balked at the question feeling his dignity had been abused enough.**_

_**"Ahh but it is. She is your only family, is she not?"**_

_**Koshijiro nodded. "So what's your point?"**_

_**Magojiro remained unflappable. "Just that you don't have a very good relationship with her, do you?"**_

_**Koshijiro felt his face redden as he barked, "How dare you get so personal! That's none of your damned business."**_

_**Magojiro countered, "The condition of your relationship with your only living relative is directly linked to your illness whether you want to admit it or not." He shuffled through some papers in a file before he continued, "I understand your wife died some time ago."**_

_**A shadow passed over Koshijiro's deep azure eyes. "Fourteen years ago to be exact," he replied flatly.**_

_**Magojiro nodded and went on, "And your daughter was about 4 or 5 wasn't she?"**_

_**"She had just turned 5. Kiyomi died the first week of July." Koshijiro felt the pain stab his heart like a knife just like always when he thought of Kiyomi's death.**_

_**Magojiro leaned forward. "So that left you alone to raise your young daughter. A difficult task for any young father."**_

_**"Thanks for the recap," Koshijiro said sarcastically.**_

_**"And you had no one else to help you. Your wife had no family near and you were an only child and your parents were both gone so it was up to you to raise…what's her name?"**_

_**"Kaoru."**_

_**"To raise Kaoru all alone," Magojiro stated. "But you ran a dojo, so it wasn't as hard as if you would have had to go out everyday to work. And she did go to school by that age so she was away all day."**_

_**Koshijiro got wary as he asked, "And where are you going with this?"**_

_**Magojiro did not answer, he merely continued his rundown. "But it goes back further, doesn't it Koshijiro-san? To when Kaoru was born."**_

_**Koshijiro's eyes narrowed. He knew exactly where the counselor was going and he loathed the situation but felt powerless to alter it so he chose to be uncommunicative. And so Magojiro went on.**_

_**"It was not an easy time, bringing your daughter into this world, was it? Your wife nearly died then but Dr. Gensai saved her life."**_

**STOP THIS NOW! _Koshijiro screamed silently but to no avail. He just nodded wordlessly as he felt the prick of tears at the way this counselor was just scraping his emotions raw by hashing over the most painful period of his life. He closed his eyes tightly as if to will the pain into submission but it was a difficult task because this time there was no sake to help make him numb._**

_**At that moment Magojiro rose from behind his desk and sat on the edge, right in front of Koshijiro and spoke in a soft, almost sympathetic tone. "Yet inside you began resenting your daughter because your wife never really recovered after she was born. So when she did die, you had built up all that disappointment and resentment and began to unleash it on your five-year-old daughter."**_

_**"Iie!" Koshijiro roared, unable to take any more. "I never laid a hand on her!"**_

_**Magojiro said softly, "That's the main problem, Koshijiro-san. You withdrew from her, withholding your love at a time a child needs it most. Think about it, your daughter lost her mother and then her father rejects her. How do you think that made a five-year old feel?"**_

_**Koshijiro lowered his head and the hollow feeling inside acted as a cavern, with Magojiro's words echoing and reverberating as he was face to face with the cold hard truth, that he had for the past 14 years been guilty of neglecting his child. He felt lower than an ant, almost completely devoid of honor as the session thankfully ended.**_

Koshijiro stared blankly out at the clouds in the sky as he now saw his life clearly, without the artificial and temporary haze that alcohol had once provided. And so the mistakes he had made like the white puffs against the blue sky stood out in stark clarity. His mind became set, no longer making excuses to justify his sins and with a grim determination, he squared his shoulders and resumed the climb to the floor where his room was.

Koshijiro's private room was actually located near the staircase, in the corner and so when he opened the door and entered the hall, he was just outside of his room. As he made to enter his room, he heard the soprano that was his daughter Kaoru's and a tenor voice of a young man engaged in conversation.

"Arigatou, Kenshin-kun. I'm so glad you came with me and have helped me so much. I just love you!"

_And who is this "Kenshin-kun" with Kaoru? _Koshijiro wondered suspiciously, feeling the usual envy a father feels when another male is pursuing his daughter. _And what does she mean she "loves him?" _He hesitated as he stood against the half open door and listened. . . .

"Oh gomen, I-I mean that I---,"

Koshijiro then heard Kaoru's words halt abruptly and his curiosity made him look and what he saw made him angry as he observed his daughter in an affectionate embrace with a diminutive but powerfully built young man with long red hair tied back and hanging down. He then strode into the room and cleared his throat loudly.

The young couple immediately drew apart as both whirled around and faced him, blushing with somewhat guilty expressions. Kaoru and the boy both bowed as she made her apology.

"H-hello otou-sama," she stammered as she tried to explain. "W-we were just here waiting for you to return from your appointment and I put your clean clothes away."

Koshijiro grunted and nodded as he waited, staring pointedly at Kenshin. "I hope you plan to introduce me to this young man, Kaoru," he said with a raised brow.

She recovered from her discomfort as she replied, "Of course forgive me. Otou-sama, this is my good friend Himura Kenshin." She gestured to the youth who was still bowing politely.

_Himura huh? _Koshijiro mused then a flash of recognition hit _of course, this is the young man I just read about, the kendoist in the paper._ He watched as Kenshin bowed even lower as he spoke.

"It is an honor to meet you, Kamiya-dono."

The boy spoke with respect and humility as he raised his face to Koshijiro and he was staring into eyes the color of lilacs, very unusual for a native of Japan. The dojo master also saw in Himura's eyes the light of the samurai, something that was becoming obsolete in the modern world of today. Against his will, he was impressed.

"You are a friend of my daughter's. Is that so, Himura-san?"

The boy bowed again as he replied, "Hai." He then glanced over at Kaoru and said almost reverently, "She is very special to me, that she is."

"I see." Koshijiro remarked as he too studied his daughter, and saw for the first time how much Kaoru resembled Kiyomi. Except for the eyes, which were his, she was the mirror image of his koishii and he could understand why the young Himura was so apparently smitten. He reminded him of his own youth when Kiyomi had stolen his heart. But he also felt threatened as he had just decided to build bridges between him and his daughter. He remained impassive as he spoke.

"So you came to bring my clothes then?"

Kaoru nodded politely, "Hai, otou-sama. And we've come to speak to you about the dojo."

His brows raised as he became wary. "Aa? Is everything all right?"

"Hai." Kaoru bowed before him and continued, "I am doing what I promised, otou-sama. I have dropped out of school and am conducting classes in your absence. But it is a difficult task so I have taken the liberty to hire a part time assistant."

Koshijiro did a double take. "An assistant?" he echoed. He then demanded, "And who, may I ask have you hired to assist that is familiar with katsujin-ken like we in the Kamiya-Kasshin Ryu are?"

Kaoru bit her lip and opened her mouth to answer but the young man Himura laid a hand on her shoulder and spoke up instead.

"Kamiya-dono, she hired me. I offered to assist her and because I need a job, she offered to pay me." His gaze was steady as he met Koshijiro eye to eye.

Koshijiro felt a growing feeling of displacement as the youth's courtesy and direct manner heightened his threatened feelings. Somehow, he felt like the torch was being torn from him before he was ready to pass it. So he fell into an all too familiar pattern and glared at his daughter as he answered Himura.

"Forgive me, Himura-san but what makes you qualified to assist in my dojo? Despite the fact that I saw the article in today's paper and know that you are on the kendo team at the university, are you well versed in katsujin-ken, which is what we base the Kamiya-Kasshin Ryu upon?"

Dismayed Kaoru protested, "Otou-sama," but Kenshin stepped forward and bowed again.

"Kamiya-dono, I have been practicing swordsmanship since I was 8 with my sensei and father Hiko Seijiro the thirteenth master of the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. It's the style I am trained in."

Koshijiro's eyes widened in understanding. The Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu was an ancient, highly respected katsujin-ken sword style and he was well aware of Hiko and his expert swordsmanship, both were famous. That more than qualified Kenshin to teach at the dojo and he could not reasonably object. So once more he felt a pang of fear at the threat this boy represented toward his life, which he felt gradually but surely slipping away.

Powerless for the first time in his life he suddenly felt very tired and he sat heavily on the bed as he had no choice but to surrender, "Very well then." He held his hand out to Kenshin and said, "Welcome to the Kamiya-dojo, Himura-san."

"Arigatou, Kamiya-dono." Kenshin smiled in pleasure and bowed as he returned the gesture and Kaoru stood there in stunned amazement at the man who looked and sounded like her father but was acting like one she had never met, gracious and polite. She had expected a scathing rebuke or a diatribe unleashed on the both of them but not this. It filled her with a cautious gladness.

"Arigatou, otou-sama," she murmured on the floor and bowing low before her father and Koshijiro felt the guilt he had just acquired concerning her and his past mistreatment of her. Slowly he rose from the bed and then bending down, he grasped her hands and gently pulled her to her feet.

Kaoru's delicate features were perplexed as she saw her hard and unapproachable progenitor gaze at her with what appeared to be affection and then further astonish her by cupping her cheek in his hand.

"Iie, it is me who must say it to you. Arigatou Kaoru-chan, for everything." Koshijiro then reached his other hand to cradle his daughter's lovely face and plant a kiss on her forehead.

Kaoru closed her eyes at the gesture and felt them well up as her heart soared. She was beyond words as she allowed herself to be loved by her father for the first time in her life. Her arms reached around his torso as she buried her head on his shoulder, sobbing.

"Otou-sama!" she said over and over.

"Hush now. Forgive me, koi," Koshijiro spoke in a quiet soothing tone.

Kenshin stood and watched the scene, his heart filled with joy as he saw Kaoru and her father finally acting as they should have all along like they are of the same blood. His own eyes became moist at the sight of his tenshi, finally getting what she had deserved all along. . .

A short time later after Kaoru and Kenshin left, Koshijiro was in his room alone brooding over the fact that his life was a wreck. He meticulously went down the mental list of failures and started with the most glaring fact. For fourteen years he had alienated his only daughter and made her feel that he never loved her when in reality nothing could be further from the truth. For many times as she grew up he had gone into Kaoru's room at night stood at her bed and watched her, thinking of Kiyomi. But then the resentment would come rushing back and he would whirl away to drown himself in sake to deaden the heartache.

He sighed deeply as he glumly contemplated how uncomfortable he felt seeing Kaoru in the young man Himura's arms, as a woman being embraced by a man. He then realized that his own wallow in the mud of self-pity had robbed him of much in the joys of seeing his little girl grow up. And now she was a woman, ready to be cherished by another man and he felt left out.

_Baka _he berated himself. _You've lost everything. First Kiyomi, and now Kaoru and the dojo. That boy Himura has the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu and I can tell he's ready to take over. Kaoru has hired him and my opinion doesn't matter. Plus it's obvious that they are taken with each other. I'm about to reclaim my little girl just to lose her._

The tirade went on, plunging him deeper into his own despair. _And it only makes sense for Kaoru to begin to keep company with men and to take over the dojo. Being she is a woman I would expect her to marry a man who could take over the dojo. And this kid's got some skills to begin with, how can I go back after he's been there holding classes. Huh, the kids in my class must love having someone like him teaching them, not a washed up old has been like me. _

Koshijiro sighed again as the idea came to him. With a set expression, he sat at the desk in his room and drew out some paper to write a letter. He scribbled a two-page missive and when finished, read it over several times. Finally satisfied, he folded it up and put it into an envelope, then sealed it, addressed it to Kaoru and pushed it aside as there was a knock on the door. Curious, he bade the person to enter.

The head nurse came in to administer his anti-depressant and said brightly, "Koshijiro-san, how are you feeling? You skipped lunch and worried us."

Koshijiro sighed as he answered, "I wasn't hungry after my daughter and her friend left so I decided to stay here. Is that a problem?"

She shook her head as she prepared the dosage. "Iie, but you should eat. You want to go home again, don't you?"

_Home? Do I really have a home to go to or will I just be in the way? _"Sure," he said convincingly enough as he reached for his pill. He popped it into his mouth and took a swallow of water as the nurse watched. He observed as she exited and then when he was sure she was gone, spit it out and tossed it in the trash.

Koshijiro then entered the bathroom and scanned the premises. It was a full bath, with toilet, sink, mirror, and a rather roomy walk-in shower. He strode over and reached up to test the shower rod for strength and after pulling a few times he saw it was anchored solidly, soldered to the wall studs. He then went out and over to the closet to rummage through to find a leather belt, the same one he had worn on his trousers the day he arrived. He took it and saw it was rather long which suited him in his purpose. He returned to the bathroom and walked up to the shower, tossing the belt up and over the rod, then knotting it tight as he could. Once that was done, he made a loop as if to fit it around his neck. He then went to get the chair at the desk and brought that in, placing it below the makeshift noose and climbed it as he slipped the belt on his neck.

"Sayonara, Kaoru-chan. Onegai forgive me, my dear child. For everything." Koshijiro said as he jumped off the chair and hung from the shower rod, the leather belt taut and easily snapping his neck, killing him. . .

Meanwhile, Kaoru's spirits were higher than she could ever have imagined. Kenshin had insisted on taking her out to lunch to celebrate the reconciliation of her father and her and he watched in pleasure as he saw her truly happy for the first time since he had met her. She giggled and her eyes sparkled with pure joy as they chatted and laughed.

Afterward, Kenshin took her to the park by the university and they sat together, watching the sun set and surrounded by fireflies as she laid her head on his shoulder, blissfully making plans for a new beginning for her father and her. Kenshin listened and his own heart rejoiced with her as he held her and she rambled on.

"Oh Kenshin I can't believe it. My father actually apologized to me and kissed me. I still can't believe it." Kaoru fingered a stray strand of his fiery hair as his denim clad arms encircled her making her happiness complete. "I must be dreaming."

She was so adorable Kenshin threw his head back and laughed. "Iie, aka-chan. You're awake and here with me, in my arms." He planted a kiss on her forehead as he tightened his hold on her.

Kaoru made a sound that sounded like the purr of a contented kitten as she nestled in his embrace, bathed in the golden glow of sunset. The sound of birds seeking their nests for the night blended with the steady trickle of the nearby fountain and created a dreamlike scene that enhanced her joy.

"Kenshin?"

He raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"

She pulled back and looked right at him. "Am I being silly?"

Kenshin smiled fondly as he replied, "Iie koibito, not at all. Everybody wants to be loved and accepted by our families." He sobered as he added, "That's why it's so heartbreaking when it doesn't happen."

"I'm glad that the heartbreak's finally over for me," she said softly.

Kenshin agreed, "Me too." He pulled her back against him.

Kaoru nodded as she again laid her head on his shoulder and they continued watching as the sun sank below the trees. . . .

It was dark and the full moon was rising when Kenshin and Kaoru returned to the dojo. Kenshin turned the Celica into the alleyway and pulled the car next to Sano's red Corolla. The headlights stabbed the brush along the storehouse wall as he cut the engine and killed the lights. They both exited the vehicle and came together, with Kenshin looping his arm around Kaoru's shoulders to walk to the dojo porch.

They had almost made it to the stairs when Kenshin stiffened at the movement of a shadow on the far corner of the porch and approaching. His reaction drew a questioning look from Kaoru as he pulled her protectively behind him.

"Who's that there?" he demanded roughly as the stout form of Dr. Gensai emerged into the moonlight and came forward. Kenshin immediately apologized, "Forgive me."

Kaoru came from behind her friend and greeted her longtime family friend. "Dr Gensai, what brings you here?"

The elderly physician looked pale and distressed, putting Kaoru in instant alarm. He said softly, hesitantly, "Kaoru-chan, something has happened."

Her heart pounding she asked fearfully, "What is it?"

Gensai swallowed hard as he tried to get a grip on his own emotions and Kenshin placed his hands on Kaoru's shoulders to offer support as they waited for the bomb to fall.

"K-Kaoru-chan, your father committed suicide this afternoon. He hung himself in his bathroom."

Kaoru heard each word in a hollow echo that seemed surreal and she shook her head slowly feeling like she was underwater. Then her legs gave way and everything went black.

**NEXT...SCUMBLE...UNCERTAIN FUTURE**


	9. CHAPTER 8 SCUMBLE UNCERTAIN FUTURE

_Author's Note: Sorry for the delay but sometimes a story takes a whole new direction and so that's why the renaming of the chapter as the aftermath of Koshijiro's suicide envelopes Kaoru in uncertainties and she buries her pain behind her wall. And the return of Tobei, who has been planning revenge for her rejection is here to add some suspense and he will be a player in a possible sequel. A huge thanks to all the readers (4095 hits—WOW) and the reviewers (103—amazing). Enjoy!_

_**Glossary of Japanese Terms**_

_**Budusan----the alter like place in a Japanese home that usually has a family scroll, a flower arrangement or in the event of a death, a photograph of the deceased. This is where callers offer their final prayers for the departed soul.**_

_**Furoba---Bath House**_

_**Sengoku-jidai----the feudal period in Japan's history roughly between 1300's and early 1600's**_

_**Busu----Ugly**_

_**Kobushi konogonani----Literally "hand broken in pieces"(I took some poetic license here as this is the grip Saito used to subdue Tobei---I don't know if it really exists in any form of martial arts)**_

**_Baka deshi----Idiot student _**

**_Shishou----Master_**

**SCUMBLE….UNCERTAIN FUTURE**

The next three days were a daze, as if Kaoru were living in a fishbowl and she was watching everything around her in blurry homogenous shapes that floated by. She emotionally isolated herself, cutting off all contact to her outside world as she walked the dark path of grief alone. Her insides felt empty and numb as she detached herself from her feelings and took refuge full time behind her wall. However in the course of the three days, she was like a robot as she went through the motions of making all the arrangements, meticulously going through the final will and insurance policies as she had her father's body cremated and the final memorial scheduled and announced.

Playing the role of guardian, Dr. Gensai stayed at the dojo and lent his assistance, helping Kaoru with her unpleasant task of tending to the red tape of the coroner's report and because of Koshijiro's notoriety as a kendo master, the media's probing. Also, Misao came to stay with her, offering her moral support by helping with meals and getting the dojo ready for callers, as they were expecting a large number.

Kenshin remained by Kaoru's side as well, trying to offer his support but he was increasingly dismayed at her manner for she appeared as she was there in body but her spirit was far away. The night they returned to the dojo and were told of the tragedy, Kaoru had fainted in shock and he had immediately scooped her up and put her on her bed. All that night he had spent in her room, dozing in a chair as he watched over her, rising each time her nightmares awoke her so he could hold her and calm her down. But the next day, she had numbed herself to the ordeal by acting detached and going about the difficult task of cremating her father's body then arranging for his memorial service. For the following two days she acted for the most part to those around her, calm and resolved but to Kenshin and Misao who really knew her, she appeared to be firmly barricaded behind her wall and in a veiled fragile state. This was what was disturbing to both as they observed the obvious pain of Kaoru that she tried valiantly to hide. . . .

It was the morning of the memorial and the third day of a driving persistent rain, with leaden clouds hanging heavily over the city throwing their burden on the populace. Strangely, the weather had worsened and the rains first fell the morning after Koshijiro's death, almost as if the elements themselves were mourning the passing of the great kendoist and member of the ancient samurai history of Japan and as such, the Kamiya dojo was inundated. The copious drops ran down the dojo roof, dripping off the eaves and into the gutter, which ran out on the saturated courtyard, making everything a dreary, muddied mess.

Kaoru had risen early and as she always did and had done these three days and since her toddler years, stood on the outside porch and watched the rain as it pattered down leaving rippled circles in the rain barrel just outside the porch. The stormy days immediately following her father's demise, she had spent many hours in the same place watching the dark clouds as they mirrored her dark thoughts. Her mind was filled with much but mostly with thoughts of her parents imagining how they must have been before she had come along and spoiled everything. She sighed in deep sorrow and in her heart apologized to them both.

_Gomen okaasan, otou-sama. I caused you both such heartache and trouble, I never should have been born. Your lives would have been much better without me._ Her words broadcast her anguish, her guilt and regret and the litany was repeated over and over again as she grieved and wondered what would happen now that she was all alone.

She reached in the pocket of her sweater and pulled out the sealed envelope Dr. Gensai had given her the morning after Koshijiro died. It had remained sealed as she was afraid to read its contents. Her head was telling her it was just another brusque list of directives but her heart wasfilled with the last time she had seen her father alive and remembered the feeling of being in his arms. The warmth of his embrace, like the first ray of sun in the spring would stay with her until the day she died and would convince her that in spite of his lifelong rejection of her that he really had loved her after all. She studied the missive with the masculine scrawl of her name, running a finger across the top and mulled overabout Koshijiro's thoughts as he penned it. Sighing heavily, she replaced the letter in her pocket.

Kaoru's melancholy musings were interrupted by a gentle touch and strong arms and as he had been want to do, Kenshin provided his comfort to her, embracing her from behind. He murmured a question.

"Why are you out here in the rain again, aka-chan? It's chilly and you could catch a cold." His soft tenor echoed in her ear and shattered the lonely silence of grief. But deep behind her wall, Kaoru had cut her heart off from everyone including him so she was unaffected.

She shrugged indifferently as she stated, "I always come out and watch the rain fall. It's something I've done since I was small."

Disturbed by her apathy Kenshin tried again as he picked up on her mood. "Come inside with me and I'll fix you some breakfast." He took hold of her elbow but she pulled away and shook her head.

"Iie, I'm not hungry." She grasped her arms and turned back toward the deluge but he was undaunted and tried again.

"You have to eat, koibito."

She whirled and glared at him. "I said I'm not hungry."

Taken aback by her vehemence, Kenshin tried another tact. "But you need to be strong for everyone is coming this afternoon, Kaoru-tenshi---," but she cut him off with a wave of her hand.

"Don't," she said shaking her head. "Don't call me that because I don't deserve to be called that. I'm just the opposite."

Kenshin's eyes widened as he asked, "What are you talking about?"

"I am not a tenshi, so don't call me that." Her tone was filled with self-loathing and that bothered Kenshin even more. He smiled as he denied her words, placing his hands on her shoulders.

"Iie, that's not true. You are, Kaoru. You are my tenshi, my saving grace when I was so deep in agony over the accident." But she recoiled and stepped away from him.

Kaoru just shook her head and said in a small voice, "Do me a favor Kenshin, just leave me alone, okay?" She pleaded at him with her sapphire orbs. "Onegai?"

His heart constricted as he caught a glimpse of the raw pain she had tried so hard to conceal. But he could refuse those jewel eyes nothing. Wanting to stay and help her to bear the agony but respecting her wishes, Kenshin nodded wordlessly and went inside. When he stepped in and closed the shoji sighing, he turned and found Misao who had been in the practice hall getting the floor polished for the callers and was there before him with a question in her eyes.

Her face drawn she asked worriedly, "Where's Kaoru?"

Kenshin replied tonelessly as he tossed his head. "Out there watching the rain again. These last three days that's all she seems to do watch the rain. I tried to get her to eat but she said she's not hungry." He scowled as his eyes narrowed in his frustration and he pounded a fist in the opposite wall with such force it nearly caused a hole. "Kuso!"

In her concern for her best friend Misao grabbed his arm and hissed, "Keep it down, Himura! Putting holes in Kaoru's dojo walls is the last thing she needs now." Her tone softened she added, "I know you're worried about her and I want to help her too but she needs time to herself to deal with this."

His head down, Kenshin nodded as he said, "I just feel so damned helpless and it pisses me off." He turned and regarded Misao with a tortured look. "I need to help her and she won't let me." He was shocked by the next statement by Misao.

"Come off it! This isn't about you, Himura," she snapped.

His eyes narrowed he retorted, "What the hell does that mean?"

She replied, "It means stop thinking about yourself and start thinking about Kaoru."

He said irritably, "I am thinking about her, Misao. I'm worried sick about her, she hasn't eaten in a couple of days and barely sleeps yet acts like nothing's wrong." He turned away and bit out, "She's completely closed herself off from everything and refuses to let me help her."

Misao sighed as she pointed out softly, "The same way you didn't let her help you when Tomoe died."

Kenshin's cold blue orbs glared at her but she went fearlessly on.

"You blew her off for a couple of weeks right after, never returning Kaoru's calls and she was worried sick about _you_. So how does it feel to be on the outside looking in?"

A punch in the gut would not have surprised Kenshin more as he turned and stared at Misao with a look of astonishment. But words failed him as he acknowledged the truth inside.

_She's right. I pushed everyone away after Tomoe died and especially Kaoru. She's only doing what I did so what am I complaining about?_ Kenshin nodded as he said, "You're right I know. I didn't let her near me that's why I want to be here for her." He turned and walked into to the practice hall and Misao followed him.

She grasped his arm and got in front of him. "Listen to me, Himura. Kaoru knows you're here for her and if I know her, she's very glad." Her teal eyes pinned him as she said, "But this is a different circumstance. Kaoru and her father were never close and she's probably dealing with guilt along with everything else. Let her have her space to sort out how she feels."

Kenshin sighed, "There's more to it than that Misao, you don't know the whole story. The day Kamiya-dono died, we had gone to see him, to tell him about Kaoru hiring me to help out at the dojo. And he was different, softer, gentler. He reached out to Kaoru and asked her forgiveness for all the years he neglected her. I was there as the two reconciled and I saw how Kaoru had wept in joy over it." He walked over to the budusan where the urn bearing Koshijiro's ashes was with a photo of him in full gear brandishing a katana. He gazed at the picture and sighed again as he continued.

"She was so happy we went and celebrated the beginning of a new life for her and Kamiya-dono. Then we came back home and found out that he committed suicide. Kaoru collapsed and I brought her to her bed and stuck by her all night as she tossed and turned. And then the next day she acted calm and just made all the arrangements for today, without shedding a tear. And that's the way it's been since then." He pursed his lips in consternation as he finished, "She's completely retreated behind her wall and that's what's got me worried."

Misao put her hand on his shoulder as she pointed out, "That's what Kaoru does when things get to be too much for her."

Kenshin sighed again. "I know. It's just that I thought she was starting to let me in and now I'm being shut out. It's driving me crazy."

Misao regarded him with a knowing glint. "You're very involved for someone who's just a friend, Himura. Sounds like there's something serious growing between you."

Kenshin became nonplussed as he stammered, "I-I'm just being a good friend." But his words and his expression did not match as a blush began to stain his cheek exposing the truth for what it was.

"I knew it, you've fallen in love with her." Misao's words were a statement of a fact and surrendering, Kenshin just nodded.

The shoji from the rear slid open and both Kenshin and Misao fell silent as Kaoru's footsteps sounded and stopped at the practice hall portal. Both her friends came forward to greet her, their concern apparent. Her face was drawn and there were dark circles under her lusterless azure eyes.

Kenshin came forward with his own eyes limpid, placing a hand on her shoulder. "How are you, aka-chan? Did you change your mind about something to eat?"

She shook her head and said, "I'm going to take a bath and get ready for everyone coming."

Kenshin said, "I'll go to the furoba and draw the bath for you."

Kaoru offered the slight semblance of a smile in gratitude as she continued, "They'll be starting to arrive at about 1:00." She glanced at the budusan and newly polished hall then said matter-of-factly, "Everything looks ready here, arigatou to you both. I don't know what I'd do without you"

Kenshin hugged her tight as Misao said with a smile, "Don't worry we're here for you, Kaoru-chan." She put an arm about Kaoru's shoulders and with Kenshin flanking her both walked her out and toward her room. . . .

The afternoon seemed endless as did the parade of mourners since Kamiya Koshijiro was well known throughout Tokyo, the surrounding prefectures and beyond for his kendo expertise. And because of this, dojo masters and championship kendoists from all over came to pay their respects, the line of visitors going out the dojo and down for a block. They all stood in the rain as they waited for their chance to offer condolences.

Inside, Kaoru was kneeling on a cushion in the practice hall, clad in a traditional dark blue silk kimono with sakura embroidered on the hem and going diagonally to her left shoulder, which had belonged to her mother. The blue of the garment reflected the color of her eyes and she wore her hair tied up with a pale pink ribbon. She looked beautiful and somber as she sat and wordlessly accepted the sympathy of the callers for her loss. Misao was in the hall by the front entrance, acting as a guide for those filing in and making sure their shoes did not get mixed up as they all slipped them off.

To her right stood Kenshin, in a dark sports jacket, dark dress slacks, and a pale blue shirt with a dark gray tie. His mane of bright titian locks was tied back and hanging down to his back, a sharp contrast to the sedate ensemble he wore for the memorial. Standing at Parade Rest, he acted the part of escort and guardian, remaining close and not moving from Kaoru's side.

He periodically cast surreptitious glances at her as she sat and nodded at the passing throng, looking like a mechanical porcelain doll. And like a porcelain doll, she appeared fragile and delicate, able to topple and be shattered at the slightest disturbance. So he wanted to be near to catch her if she fell. He also was acclimating himself to the statement Misao made about being in love with Kaoru and the idea was feeling more natural to him. He was realizing more and more that his heart was captured by the beautiful paradox that was a mixture of strength and gentleness. He also decided that he wanted desperately to wipe away every tear from the past and bear her pain as his own. . . .

The time dragged on as dojo masters, their assistants, and their students all filed by, stopping at the budusan to offer their prayers for the deceased soul of Kamiya Koshijiro, and then his good friend Maekawa who ran the next largest dojo in the city. He was Koshijiro's oldest and closest friend and when he had finished offering his prayers for his friend, came over to offer support to Koshijiro's daughter who he loved as if she were his own.

The dojo master knelt down before Kaoru and embraced her, holding her stiff form as he said, "Gomen, Kaoru-chan. I spoke to him many times, telling him he was wrong for years but he was stubborn as you know."

"Hai," Kaoru responded "He was that but the last time I saw him, it seemed he was changing his ways." She pulled away and shook her head, then gazed up into the older man's eyes. "Arigatou for coming."

Maekawa rose and taking her hands, helped her to her feet, and returned the regard as he said, "If you need anything, call me. I'll even sub for you or take some of your classes."

Kaoru shook her head. "Iie, that's not necessary." She looked over at Kenshin and added, "I have some excellent help, my friend Himura Kenshin is helping me by working at the dojo." She then took hold of Kenshin's sleeve and pulled him into the conversation. "This is Himura Kenshin, he's the champion on our kendo team at the university."

Maekawa bowed and offered his hand to the redheaded youth who also bowed in respect as the dojo master remarked, "I am well aware of you and your accomplishments. You have quite a lot of skill, Himura-san."

Kenshin responded, "Arigatou Maekawa-dono. I am honored by your words."

Maekawa stepped back to take his leave and Kenshin turned to Kaoru to ask, "How are you doing so far?" His concern apparent in his eyes

Kaoru pasted a smile on and answered, "I'm okay." She then turned to resume receiving as more mourners came to offer their condolences. . . .

And so the afternoon progressed with more members of the kendo community coming to offer their words of sympathy and comfort for Kaoru's loss. Many of the mourners were familiar as her father had belonged to several kendo associations, as the founder of a popular sword style taught at many dojos, and was a retired infantryman in the Imperial Army. So as such, many callers from the Army, former and current students, and fellow kendo masters came from all over.

At the midafternoon point, the crowd had thinned somewhat and Misao came into the practice hall to see how Kaoru was faring. She approached Kenshin, who had stood a little farther from Kaoru as she was speaking with a lieutenant from the fourth infantry squad who had known her father when he was in the service.

She pulled him aside and remarked sotto voce, "Man, I had no idea Kaoru's father was so well known." She took a deep breath as she snuck a peek at her best friend and asked, "So how's she doing?"

Kenshin gazed at Kaoru watching in grudging admiration as she was the soul of cool composure, graciously receiving the visiting mourners paying their respects and he frowned as he said sardonically, "Check it out yoursef, Misao. Wall firmly in place."

"Hmmm," Misao responded as she too cast her gaze on Kaoru. "I see what you mean." She sighed as she added, "Well, you have to hand it to her, she's really keeping it together. I mean if it were me, I'd be a total wreck."

"Aa," said Kenshin still frowning. "But I'm certain that she's just putting up a great front, that inside she's on the verge of falling completely apart." _And I'll be here to pick up the pieces, that I will_ he determined as his heart constricted in pain for her.

The sound of more mourners arriving echoed in the front hall so Misao turned and went out to greet them. She stopped as she saw the towering and imposing figure of Hiko Seijiro draped in a white cape and his raven hair in a samurai topknot. Her teal eyes became large as saucers and she looked up as if to the sky.

Hiko said in his low key baritone. "I take it this is the memorial of Kamiya Koshijiro, the founder and master of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryuu." His icy aqua eyes bore into her.

Misao nodded, still transfixed by the infamous swordsman who was Kenshin's adoptive father and she stepped aside so he could stride in. He made his way to the budusan and stopped before it, then knelt down with his head bowed in reverent respect.

Over by Kaoru, who stood with her own head bowed, Kenshin stared at his shishou, a hard and unfeeling man who had the power above all to irritate and irk him. When he was a boy, Hiko's austere manner unnerved him but he quickly learned soon after he came to live with the sword master, to show no sign of reaction, which would be considered a sign of weakness. And there was nothing Hiko abohorred more then weakness in his adoptive son and student. So Kenshin assumed a impassive expression as Hiko concluded his prayer then rose to his full 6'5 height and turned to face Kaoru. He strode over and stood before the petite young woman.

Hiko bowed his head low as Kaoru stared at the tall swordsman in subdued awe, having heard all about the man from Kenshin who had regaled her with countless stories of the enigmatic man who raised him from when he was orphaned at eight. Her surprise was evident and then grew when he raised his head and his face bore an expression of sympathy softening his strong features.

"Gomen nasai, Kamiya-san," he said softly. "I knew and respected your father, he was a man of great sword skill and honor. I am deeply saddened by your loss."

Rendered speechless by the sword master's kind words Kaoru returned the bow and nodded as Hiko turned to Kenshin and regarded him dourly.

"So I see you are here, eh? You did not return to Kyoto for the university break." He glanced again at Kaoru significantly as he raised an eyebrow in query.

Kenshin caught his shishou's subtle meaning and his eyes narrowed as he replied flatly, "Kaoru is my friend and I came to help her in this difficult time, that I did."

"I see." Hiko turned and headed out but said over his shoulder. "Come out to the hall with me, Kenshin. I wish to speak to you."

Kenshin sighed in annoyance as he apologized to Kaoru, "Gomen, aka-chan. I'll be right back." He laid a gentle hand on her shouder.

She shrugged and nodded at him then he turned and went out into the hall where Hiko waited, his arms crossed and a stern look on his hawklike visage. Misao cast a glance at Kenshin as he passed her and sensing the tense atmosphere between the two, made her way back into the practice hall to leave the two alone. Kenshin just walked up to his guardian and stood at attention.

Hiko began, "So you have been here all this time. I called your apartment several times and finally reached your roommate who told me nothing. It appears you can trust him to keep your secrets."

Kenshin responded shortly, "It was no secret. Kaoru hired me here to assist her as she took her father's place giving lessons while he recuperated from his accident." He added, "Remember, I needed to find a job so I could earn the money to buy a car."

"I see." Hiko's piercing orbs pinned his son as he asked, "Is that all you are here for or is there another reason?"

His insinuation caused Kenshin's cheeks to redden slightly as he bristled and bit out, "Of course. Why else would I be here?" His own eyes had grown frosty blue as he fought to clamp down on his rising temper.

Hiko saw Kenshin's discomfort and smirked as he said, "Relax, baka deshi. I'm not interested in prying into your affairs, I'm merely concerned about your future. I am paying for your tuition still and I want to make sure my money is not wasted by you neglecting your studies."

Kenshin sighed and answered resignedly, "I'm not neglecting my studies. When classes resume next week my schedule has most of my classes in the afternoon and evening so I can work here at the dojo in the morning."

Hiko grunted as he inquired, "And have you changed your mind about becoming successor to the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryuu and decided to teach it here?" He added a sly remark. "Kamiya-san is a very pretty girl and I'm sure she can be quite persuasive."

Kenshin saw the suggestion in his shishou's eyes and he immediately took umbrage at the unspoken comment. He snapped, "I haven't changed my mind at all. I'm assisting with the teaching of Kamiya Kasshin Ryuu, for your information!"

"Don't get so defensive," Hiko said, annoyed. "I merely made an inquiry, as my apprentice you are the natural successor to Hiten Mitsurugi so to teach another sword style is unseemly."

_Apprentice. Even though he formally adopted me he still never refers to me as son but always apprentice, keeping that distance between us. It's been that way since I was a kid so I shouldn't be surprised But it still bothers me _Kenshin sighed as he mused briefly upon the reason he refused the role of successor to Hiten Mitsurugi. He recalled the time he stumbled upon the history scroll of the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryuu including all the successors. He noticed that it was originally a form of satsujin-ken used during the late Sengoku-jidai early Tokugawa Era then changed during the end of the Bakumatsu era by a rurouni swodsman who wielded a sakabatou and turned the style to katsujin-ken, a sword that protects. But deep inside being the pacifist he was he did not want to be successor to a style that was formerly a killing style of swordsmanship.

He replied, "I've not changed my mind. I'm just helping my good friend Kaoru and especially now, she needs me. So I plan to be here for her as long as she wants me to." His arms folded, he stubbornly stood his ground.

Hiko's eyes narrowed slightly as he grunted, "Humph! Well, just make sure that you keep up your classwork and don't flunk out." He turned and opened the shoji to go and left a parting shot over his shoulder. "Because I won't pay for another semester if you do."

The present master of the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryuu brushed past some new mourners arriving and Kenshin was surprised to see most of the kendo team from the university enter the dojo, led by Baisotei-sensei. He bowed in respect and addressed the sensei.

"Konichi wa, sensei. Arigatou for coming."

Baisotei bowed and said, "Kaoru-san is on my team. There is no way we would not come here to pay our respect. And I knew Kamiya-san from competitions we both were in."

Kenshin nodded as he gestured the sensei in, followed by various team members, including Myojin Yahiko and Shinomori Aoshi. And then bringing up the rear the arrogant figure of Saito Haijime sauntered in causing the redhead to scowl at his adversary.

He said acidly, "It's strange to see you here, ookami."

Saito slightly narrowed his eyes and shrugged carelessly. "Why wouldn't I come? I am the _captain_ of the team, after all and Kamiya-san is one of my team members. It's a matter of respect for her."

Kenshin snorted in derision. "Oh right. Seems convenient since you've done nothing but hassle her since she's joined us."

Saito did not blink an eye as he responded, "Baka, I always respected her fighting skills, I just wanted to make sure she could take it. As captain it's my job to motovate my team." He pushed past Kenshin as he said, "I've no time to waste arguing with you, I'm here to pay my respects."

Saito strode into the practice hall as Aoshi came to Kenshin and muttered, "He's here because Baisotei-sensei insisted saying it's what the captain of the team does. Otherwise, he'd have never come."

Kenshin smirked as he said, "It figures. Ookami's such a control freak that if he thought for one minute that his position as captain was in trouble, he'd sell his family to make sure he would stay in charge."

Aoshi nodded and then asked, "Is Misao in there?" He pointed at the practice hall.

"Aa. She stayed with Kaoru while I was out here with Hiko. He came by to pay his respects and was chewing me out, as usual."

Aoshi nodded again and then suggested, "Let's go into the practice hall." Both boys headed into the hall. . . .

Inside, the university kendo team were gathered at the budusan, each taking turns to kneel and pray for Koshijiro's departed soul. Yahiko was the first to finish, then stood up and went over to Kaoru.

"Gomen, Kaoru," he said not using the nickname "busu" that he usually called her when they sparred. He bowed before her in a solemn manner, very unusual. He then reached and squeezed her hand.

Kaoru's eyes were sapphire pools as she was both touched and surprised by Yahiko's gesture, then flustered the youth released her hand, turned and hurried out. Then she was further moved by the entire kendo team from the university coming and doing the same.

Misao's eyes sparkled as she watched her Aoshi-sama kneel with his head bowed reverently, and then as he made his way to Kaoru, he bowed again as he spoke his piece.

"Gomen Kaoru-san for the loss of your father." His baritone rumbled as his eyes were warm with sympathy.

"Arigatou, Aoshi-san," Kaoru responded and she returned the bow while Kenshin came over and joined them. He wrapped an arm about her shoulders in a comforting measure but she acted impervious to him and just stood there.

Misao addressed Aoshi with a gleam in her eye. "I had no idea you planned to come here, Aoshi."

"The team decided to come together when we heard what had happened. Kaoru-san is a teammate and we all wanted to support her." Aoshi's expression was deadpan as usual.

Misao smiled adoringly at her beloved. "That was a very sweet thing to do."

"Hai," Kenshin chipped in then spotted something that caused his eyes to widen in disbelief. "Well, would you look at that!" he expostulated in awe as he gestured to the budusan.

Kaoru was expressing her appreciation to Aoshi and then her eyes widened too as she glanced at what Kenshin pointed to. She gasped softly as she witnessed something that amazed her. Transfixed, she extricated herself from Kenshin's grasp much to his chagrin and walked over to the budusan where Saito had knelt and was bowing face down in prayer for her late father.

Saito was finishing his tribute, raising his head up and then standing and turning toward a dumbfounded Kaoru, he bowed again as he said, "Gomen nasai Kamiya-san for the death of your father."

Kaoru bowed and answered, "Arigatou Saito-san. Forgive me for not attending practice lately." As captain of the team, he was like an associate master and the other team members were accountable to him so she felt she owed him. But she was further surprised by his next statement.

Saito brushed off the regret. "Don't worry about it. Come when things get better and if you need help, don't hesitate to call me." He turned and strode past the flabbergasted trio standing on the side and brushed past the rest of the team and Baisotei-sensei, who had just finished himself. The kendo team master came to Kaoru and grasped her hands as she bowed.

"Arigatou for coming, Baisotei-sensei," Kaoru murmured as the burly man's craggy features grew soft with his condolences.

"That is not necessary," he said. "You are a member of us and so we all grieve with you." He turned to the group aside and addressed the red haired youth.

Baisotei remarked, "I'm surprised to see you here, Himura-kun. I had wondered where you had been this week but now I see that you've been assisting Kaoru-kun."

Kenshin nodded and assured him. "I will be ready for the next match sensei, I promise."

"I'm not worried about that," Baisotei said. "I'm sure your skills remain excellent as always and am confident that you will."

Kenshin bowed as Misao and Aoshi both looked on and the group did not notice as a shadowy young man slipped in with another group from an out of town dojo. Kaoru's former attacker Tobei kept a distance from them, his onyx eyes focused on Kaoru, with a predatory gleam in them. Since the time at **_Guido's _**Tobei had been keeping an obsessive watch on Kaoru, waiting for a chance to get his revenge for her rejection of him. When he read about her father's suicide in the papers, he saw his golden opportunity. Waiting to the side as the group was offering their expressions of grief, he bided his time. Finally the group moved away and Tobei saw the opening he was ready for. He went to the budusan and knelt down to feign a prayer for Koshijiro to blend in with the others.

Kaoru was receiving the well wishes of the group from the Tsukioka Dojo from Koga and did not notice when Tobei snuck up behind them and came face to face with the woman that had haunted his thoughts for the last half year.

Kaoru was preoccupied with her role as grieving daughter so she did not notice at first that it was Tobei in front of her. She bowed and made her perfunctory thanks, then raised her eyes and gasped as she saw the man who caused her such fear before.

Tobei smirked as he murmured, "Hello Kaoru. Long time no see."

Glancing fearfully at Kenshin, who was in conversation with the Tsukioka group along with Aoshi and Misao she hissed, "What the hell are you doing here, Tobei?"

He chuckled as he relished seeing her squirm. "Why, that's not very gracious especially since I came here to offer my regrets at your loss." He grabbed her arm and growled, "You come with me and don't even think about calling for the redheaded shrimp to help you 'cause we're gonna talk. Now."

He hustled her past the group of kendoists conversing with her friends and down the hallway to the shoji leading out into the courtyard. But he did not notice that a lean figure had lingered in the front hall and witnessed the activity then followed after them.

Outside, the rain had finally tapered off and a few drops were drizzling as Tobei yanked Kaoru over to the storehouse and around its corner, secluding them from the back porch of the dojo. Backing her against the wall and using his arms to surround her he caged her in and rendered her helpless, revelling in his power over her.

Unwilling to show him any fear, Kaoru glared up at Tobei and sneered, "You're really pathetic, chasing after someone who doesn't want you. Are you really that hard up that you have to force your attentions on me?"

Her barb hit home as Tobei's eyes narrowed and he ground out, "You bitch, you can't say that to me. I'm gonna make you sorry for that."

He raised his right hand, which he balled into a fist and was about to strike her when he found his hand enclosed as if in a vice and a deep voice drawled, "I don't think so,"

Enraged Tobei whirled his head about and came face to face with the wolfish grin of Saito Haijime who had an iron grip on Kaoru's would-be tormenter. His face blanched as he faced the captain of the university kendo team and Kaoru was shocked at his appearance as well. . .

Inside, the crowd had dissipated and Kenshin immediately noticed Kaoru was missing. Without a word, he stalked from the practice hall and began to search the entire dojo, from the sleeping quarters, to the kitchen with her nowhere in sight. Alarmed and feeling in his ki that something was gravely wrong, he wracked his brain to try to think of where Kaoru could have gone while he headed back to the practice hall. As he returned to the hall, Misao and Aoshi met him there, their faces showing a mixture of concern and fear.

"What's the matter, Himura?" Misao asked as Kenshin glanced about scowling, his eyes narrowed and amber tinted.

"Kaoru's missing." He uttered a curse as he glanced toward the receiving hall and seeing it empty he snapped, "Where the hell did she go?"

Misao laid a hand on his shoulder. "Chill Himura, she's got to be here somewhere, she wouldn't just leave knowing that everyone would be coming for the memorial."

Aoshi nodded and said, "I'll help you find her. She's around here somewhere." He froze as he stated, "Her ki is close."

"Hai, I know but it's also distressed," Kenshin pointed out. "So we'd better find her."

Aoshi nodded and both men took off to resume the search and were headed to a seldom used area when a scream sounded from outside the shoji leading to the courtyard. They stopped and rerouted their steps, flinging open the shoji and heading out as Misao followed. . . .

Out by the far side of the storehouse, Saito had Tobei's hand still in his grip as the latter released Kaoru to try and wrench himself free. The ookami chuckled mirthlessly at his futile attempts at freedom and Kaoru pushed away, gasping as she stumbled and fell, shrieking as she hit the muddy ground.

"Baka," Saito scoffed. "Do you really think you can get away from me? I could break your hand without any effort." He tightened his hold for emphasis as Tobei was driven to his knees moaning in pain.

The bang of the shoji being opened sounded as Kenshin, Aoshi, and Misao all barreled down the porch and into the courtyard. At once, Kenshin saw the bedraggled form of his koishii in the rain saturated ground by the front staircase of the storehouse and he raced over to her.

He knelt down and grasped her shoulders to gaze at her in concern. "Kaoru-tenshi, are you okay? What happened?" Aoshi and Misao also crowded around her as she tried to recover from the incident.

"H-hai," she stammered as Kenshin gently helped Kaoru to her feet, and tried to brush the mud from her kimono. She glanced blankly at him and pushed his hand away.

Dismayed by her continued reticence but deferring to her wishes Kenshin withdrew his hands and stood by frowning as Misao asked worriedly, "So what happened, Kaoru-chan?"

She took a deep breath and replied, "It was Tobei. He heard about my father's memorial and came here to look for me." Misao looped an arm around her friend as she was outraged.

"How dare he? That's so low!" She glanced at her boyfriend to affirm her statement.

Aoshi inclined his head and scowled as Kenshin cursed savagely and demanded, "So where the hell is the bastard now?"

Kaoru gestured to the corner of the storehouse. "There. That's where he dragged me but--," the rest of her words were ignored as the men sprinted over to the corner.

Livid, Kenshin burst into the narrow alley between the storehouse and dojo fence bellowing "TOBEI! SHOW YOURSELF!"

The pop of a match striking with the flare of flame greeted him as a lank figure emerged from the shadows, blowing a plume of smoke into the rain washed air. Saito came into view as he drew on his cigarette and expelled the smoke, this time into Kenshin's face. The redhead coughed and scowled as his adversary leaned lazily against the storehouse.

"Sorry to disappoint you but he's not here." He took another drag as Aoshi and Kenshin both went to confront him.

Kenshin took a deep breath to bring his temper down. "Saito, I want to know what happened and why are you still here? So tell me."

The captain of the kendo team flicked his cigarette ashes and answered, "I was leaving with the team and saw this guy that looked suspicious sneaking into the dojo. So I followed him to watch what he was doing and while you were busy, I saw him take Kamiya-san out here. He was about to hit her when I stopped him."

"So where is he now?" Kenshin wanted to know.

Saito finished his cigarette and tossed the butt away. "The insect scurried away but not unscathed. I almost broke his hand with a kobushi konogonani hold," he said with a careless shrug.

Aoshi's eyes widened in grudging admiration and Kenshin nodded as he said, "You're going to make a helluva cop, Saito. But answer me this, why all the concern about Kaoru?"

Saito reached in his pocket for another cigarette. After he took his time lighting it, he turned as if to leave and said over his shoulder, "I'm the captain of the kendo team. She's part of the team, it's my job."

It was not easy to acknowledge but Kenshin was grateful for Saito's intervention. If not for his timely action who knows what could have happened to Kaoru. So he bowed stiffly and said, "Arigatou."

His back to Kenshin and Aoshi, Saito just shrugged and left a trail of smoke in his wake. . . .

Several blocks away, in a dark alley Tobei was out of breath, heaving huge gulps of air as he struggled to breathe normally. His heart pounding, he crept forward and peeked warily around the corner to see if his pursuer was about. The street both ways for the most part was deserted as the rain had driven everyone indoors. He sighed in relief, having finally lost that guy with the wolf's eyes and he shook his still sore hand. A little more pressure and it would have been broken, luck was with him as he had managed to break free and escape but the man had chased him and nearly caught him. Had it not been for his prior training as a gymnast and natural agility, he would have. But Tobei had been able to leap from the ground and hide in some tree branches until his pursuer had given up. Satisfied, Tobei moved back into the alley to relax and collect himself then figure out his next move.

Tobei took a deep breath and sat on an empty crate as he thought back on the exquisite vision of Kaoru's terror filled sapphire eyes and he fantasized about those eyes bulging and then fluttering closed as the oxygen was cut off, never to open again. All things considered, he was mildly disappointed, he almost had her and smiled at the thought then spoke aloud to his quarry.

"Rest up for now, Kaoru. For your payback is coming and I will have you then send you to meet your father in the afterlife."

Whistling cheerfully, the crazed man got up and headed off to plan. . . .

**NEXT….LIGHT STUDY….PICKING UP THE PIECES**


	10. CHAPTER 10 LIGHT STUDY PICKING UP TH

_Author's Note: Here's an early Christmas gift for everybody enjoying this story, an update with a major serving of fluff with a touch of citrus on the side. And if Kenshin appears a bit OOC it because his anger has him in the modern version of Battousai (this is an A/U after all). Enjoy and thanks to each reader, those who put me on alert or made me a favorite and the ever-faithful reviewers. And keep those hits coming!_

_**Glossary of Japanese Terms**_

_**Taisetsu na musume---Literally "Precious Daughter"**_

**LIGHT STUDY….PICKING UP THE PIECES**

While the men were in the alley dealing with Saitou, Misao had managed to get Kaoru back inside the dojo. Wet and mud-splattered, she appeared like a homeless waif and that just added to the melencholy view she portrayed as the two girls entered the hall heading to her room. Misao had her arm about her friend to help support Kaoru as she appeared still shaken by the ordeal.

"Come on, Kaoru-chan. We'll get you all cleaned up." Misao slid open the shoji and flipped on the light as they entered the room. The fiery pixie led her best friend over to the closet and then began to slip off the dirty kimono.

Kaoru just stood there, numb and unresponsive as Misao got before her to gaze into her dull ocean eyes. The grieving young woman had her head down, the overgrown raven bangs obscuring her face until Misao took her chin and raised her head to look directly at her.

"Kaoru-chan?" she asked uncertainly. "Are you okay?"

The sapphire orbs that usually sparkled like a jewel looked dully back. Then like a switch was flicked, Kaoru's face brightened slightly with a smile as she buried her pain and fear behind her infamous wall.

"Sure, Misao-chan. I'm fine, don't worry about me."

She moved away from Misao and began to take off her kimono, acting again like nothing was wrong. But knowing Kaoru like she did by that very nature Misao knew that the opposite was true. And that frightened her because she knew that her friend was hanging on by a thread.

Her back facing Misao Kaoru said in a small cool voice, "Misao, will you please step out and let me get changed?"

"Aa." Without hesitation Misao went to the shoji. She added, "Call me if you need me, Kaoru-chan."

"Uh-huh."

The kimono slid to the floor in a pool at her feet and Kaoru began to rifle through her closet for a change of clothes as the shoji slid shut. Taking out a sweater and jeans, she dressed and then turned to stare at her dansu, an expression of dread and resignation on her pretty face.

Alone now, Kaoru decided the time had come to finally do what she had been indefinitely putting off. She went to the dansu and opening the top drawer, she pulled out the envelope addressed to her in her father's hand. She took a deep breath as if plunging into unchartered waters and tore open the envelope. . . .

Once in the hall, Misao leaned back on the wall with a deep sigh and rested her head with eyes closed, her emotions frazzled by the events of the day. She fought off her own tears as the sound of Kenshin and Aoshi returning sounded down the hall. Wiping her eyes dry, she hurried down the hall to join them.

Both men were agitated by the previous encounter with Saitou and were muttering among themselves as she came to them. Misao opened her mouth to greet them but gasped as she witnessed the usually mild-mannered Kenshin in a fury, cursing violently under his breath.

"That scummy son of a bitch," Kenshin growled as his face was twisted with a dark scowl. "He's got a hell of a nerve, coming here to harass Kaoru at her father's memorial. I wish I had gotten there first, I'd have torn him apart."

Misao just stared at her friend and was shocked to see Kenshin's expression. Thunderous was a mild description but terrifying was more appropos, he was positively livid. And she was further amazed at the color of his eyes, gold with a slight violet tint, narrowed and dangerous like a jungle predator.

Aoshi's own eyes were glacial blue as he stated, "At least Saito was around to rescue Kaoru-san."

Kenshin snorted in disgust, "Keh, that ookami bastard's another one. He could have kept Tobei there so I could get to him." He turned to Misao and asked, "Where's Kaoru?"

Misao opened her mouth to reply but a soft soprano answered from behind, "Right here."

"Huh?" All three turned as Kaoru strolled over, clad in a black sweater and faded jeans.

Kenshin saw her and like the sun bursting through a dark thunderhead his expression changed as did his eyes to a soft lavender when they rested on her. He stepped around Misao and placed his hands on Kaoru's slender shoulders, his face a study in tender concern.

"Are you okay, koibito? Did he hurt you?" he murmured, gazing right into her eyes.

She gave him a bland smile that was eerie and jarred him as she replied, "Iie, Saitou-san stepped in before Tobei could try anything."

Undaunted Kenshin inquired, "Why didn't you call me if you were in trouble?"

Lowering her head Kaoru said, "He came in with a group then came over and forced me to leave with him. You were busy talking to the others in that group and he rushed me out through the crowd."

"Kuso!" Kenshin swore as his fury returned. "Go on," he urged.

Kaoru sighed and she continued, "He dragged me over to the storehouse and had me trapped then when he was about to hit me, Saito showed up and saved me." She shuddered and Kenshin wrapped her in his arms tightly, cradling her head against his.

"Tenshi," the red-haired kendo champ murmured. "You should've called me. I'd have never let that bastard near you." Over Kaoru's shoulder he glanced at Aoshi and the latter nodded in silent agreement.

In an uncharacteristic move, Kaoru pushed herself out of his embrace and turned away as she stated, "I have to go now, minna." She grasped her arms as if chilled and the trio of her devoted friends became very worried, exchanging glances between them.

Perplexed and a bit irked by her cold demeanor towards him Kenshin said a bit roughly, "Just where do you have to go now, Kaoru? It's still lousy out there and it's almost sunset."

She answered without turning, "It's stopped raining though." She added, "I have a task to take care of."

Dismayed, Misao asked, "Can't it wait till tomorrow, Kaoru-chan. You've been through enough today."

"I agree, " Aoshi added.

But stubborn as always Kaoru shook her ebony head. "Iie, I have to take care of this now."

Still incensed by what had happened to her and his patience running thin Kenshin grabbed her shoulder and turned her around to face him and the others. "What kind of task?"

Kaoru took a deep breath and reached in her jeans pocket to fish out a folded piece of paper. Handing it to him she said, "Read for yourself."

Now truly puzzled, Kenshin unfolded the document and began to read as Misao nudged Aoshi and the two slipped away, leaving Kenshin and Kaoru alone as he read the contents:

_**Taisetsu na musume,**_

_**To write this to you was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. Asking you to forgive me is far too much to hope for yet my heart aches to hear those words. That you forgive me for having made your life a living hell, feeling and believing that I never loved you. Kaoru-koi, I know nothing I say can ever wipe out that dark hole I threw you into when your mother left us for the afterlife. And now that I plan to join her, the time has come for me to try to make amends.**_

_**Kaoru, the day you were born was a day of wonder for me. When I saw you for the first time, so tiny and perfect, a miniature version of my Kiyomi-koishii my heart was so full of love for you both and I was filled with joy for our future. But the next day as I went to see you both, I was kept from going in the room and I peeked inside and saw a group of doctors and nurses all around your mother. Of course I demanded to know what was happening with my wife and after getting the run around one doctor came out and told me that your mother had been in cardiac arrest. When I was told that, I lost it and then the doctor said she was still alive but giving birth to you had weakened her heart. He told us to not have anymore children. It was a blow from which I never recovered and I became filled with resentment. After going in to see and hold your mother, I went to see you. And my child, all I could see was Kiyomi, drifting away from me as you lay there so I am shamed to say, my heart began to harden. And as you grew from an infant to a child it got harder, especially when I watched your mother spend her meager energy on caring for you. **_

_**The day she finally left us, I was so filled with resentment and bitterness and you, dear child, was where I wrongfully directed my anger. Instead of reaching out and giving you the love you lost from your mother and deserved to receive from your father, I'm so sorry to say I pushed you away, blaming you for her death. I closed my heart to you and my ears to your tears, even though I could hear you cry yourself to sleep many nights. I disappeared inside a sake jug, to deaden the pain of my own grief and make me indifferent to those tears. True, I provided for you; food, clothes, and shelter but you were no more than an obligation to me as I had a public reputation to uphold as a well-known kendo instructor. I wanted nothing more than to avoid the loss of face I would have experienced if I out in out rejected you. Teaching you the techniques of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu downgraded you into the role of student and allowed me to continue keeping you at a distance from me while giving the outward appearance of being a good father who wanted my daughter to succeed me at my dojo. It was quite the convincing act to everyone but you who bore the brunt of my biterness and to Gensai, who never hesitated to call me all kinds of a fool (among other things).**_

_**But Kaoru, I want to say this. In the midst of all that anger and resentment, I watched as you girded yourself and in fact became indifferent to my behavior. Like water from a duck you shook off my verbal abuse and endured my neglect so through that I saw much of me in your resilience. Yet as I watched you grow from childhood into a young lady, I saw the resemblance to Kiyomi in the compassion and kindness you had, never hesitating to try to care for me. And I saw your teneciousness and strength which made me both glad and proud. You learned the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu quickly and soon became a formidable fighter, it warmed my heart to see you win match after match as you became even stronger. Yet at the same time, I saw you blossom into a lovely young woman, the mirror image of your mother, except for your eyes, which were deep blue like mine. Although you probably don't believe me, I was aware of my young male students watching you and I found myself feeling protective and very much like a father when I went even tougher on the ones who would gawk at you.**_

_**Kaoru, I know that you bore the burdens of my drunkenness as well. It became so easy to drink myself into a stupor at the day's end instead of facing you and seeing your mother's face in yours that it became my escape. But always the next day, the demons I tried so hard to bury with sake came roaring back and so I avoided you completely. By the time this became my routine, you had grown up, and apppeared just as indifferent as I was. The day you graduated from high school and informed me of your plans to go to the university to be an artist, I was furious because I had come to depend on you to take care of my needs, and I lashed out at you, thinking of your leaving me as abandonment and betrayal. Again, my dear child, I beg for your forgiveness.**_

_**The accident was blessing in disguise because it brought me to a crossroads, where I was forced into making a choice, either stop drinking and pick up the pieces of my shattered life to try to start anew with you or just hit bottom and stay there. The counseling I received in my brief time here was showing me that (although I fought it—you know how I am). But it was your wonderful mother that really got through to me. In a visitation she made me realize how very, very wrong I was to blame you for her death and that I was on the verge of losing you forever. And when I returned to my room and saw you with that young man, it hit me that you now are a woman, capable of being loved by a man. It has weighed me down heavily that I wasted away the joy of seeing you grow, koi. And then when you told me you had hired this young kendo champion Kenshin to help at the dojo, I knew that it was too late to right the wrongs and my time had past. I also knew at that moment that I was a has-been and the time had come to just fade away.**_

His heart aching for her, Kenshin glanced up to look at Kaoru and see if he was being too intrusive reading this but she was not even facing him, turned with her back to him. He took a deep breath and continued reading…

**_Kaoru, I do have one last favor to ask of you although I am in no position to be asking. _**_**Would you please take my ashes to the beach at Yokohama and scatter them there? You know "**__**our place"? The few happy times I remember from your childhood, are the times we went to our **__**place on the beach when your mother was alive and it was where I scattered hers. So, it would **__**give my soul peace if you did that for me, child. **__**Once again, I am very sorry for having burdened you with having such a monster for a **__**father.**_

_**Sayonara taisutsu no musume,**_

_**Your shamed father**_

_**Kamiya Koshijiro**_

Kenshin shuffled the pages of the missive and the sound prompted Kaoru to turn and say in a rather brittle tone, "Do you see why I need to go now? Or do I have to do something else to convince you?" She held out her hand for the letter.

Kenshin folded the letter and handed it to her shaking his head but saying firmly, "I'm going with you."

She pocketed the missive then went over to the wall hook to retrieve her jacket. "Thanks but I'd rather go alone." She donned the garment but Kenshin was adamant as he got right before her.

"Look Kaoru, whether you want me to or not, I am going. So you have a choice---either I ride in your car with you or I follow you in Sano's. It makes no difference to me." He reached for his own jacket and offered his arm. "Shall we go?"

Miffed by his overbearing manner Kaoru frowned as she sniffed, "Suit yourself. But I need to go get the urn."

"Go ahead."

She bowed and retorted sardonically, "Arigatou, Kenshin-sama." She then flounced off to the practice hall as Kenshin sighed in relief having won the battle.

A few minutes later, Kaoru came out with the urn in her hands as Misao and Aoshi joined them from another part of the dojo. Misao noticed the jackets on the couple and curious she began probing.

"So you both are going out, huh? Can I ask where?"

Kaoru gave her friend a slight smile. "We're going to the beach at Yokahama. My father requested that his ashes be scattered there."

Kenshin took the urn from Kaoru which earned him a glare from her as he added matter-of-factly, "Aa, and we'd better get going before dark. Right, Kaoru?"

Shocked and a bit annoyed by his sudden take charge attitude, Kaoru nodded then as he went to the rear door to slip on his shoes, he stood waiting for her so she shrugged at Misao and Aoshi and then brushed past Kenshin in a huff to go outside. He grinned reassuringly at the two staring and followed her out to her car. . . .

The ride out to Yokohama was silent as both Kaoru and Kenshin were lost in their own private reveries. From the moment they entered the Celica, neither ventured any comment as Kaoru drove carefully to the highway to make the short trek to the shore. The late afternoon was still cloudy but thankfully the rain was finished, which made driving easier.

As they cruised along, Kenshin's mind was on the words of Koshijiro's letter and he felt an intense feeling of guilt. Guilt because it was clear that the man had felt threatened by him, thinking himself usurped at his own dojo. It was something Kenshin had dreaded, for when he met Kaoru's father, he wanted desperately to be accepted feeling that if her father accepted him working with his daughter, he would accept him in other parts of her life as well. And that was something for which he yearned.

Over at the wheel, Kaoru's mind pondered as she drove, her thoughts on the words her father penned before he took his life. His agony was causing a chill in her heart, and deep inside she was filled with a vast sense of waste. The waste of her father's life and the waste of their estranged relationship was all so pointless because the unhappiness could have easily been avoided. The unfairness and futility of the entire situation made her frustrated as she wrestled with her chaotic emotions.

Seeing the shoreline Kaoru exited the highway and drove along the road that flanked the beach and then pulled into the empty parking lot. She killed the motor and the sound of the pounding waves echoed in the silence between her and Kenshin as she sat and stared at the clouds on the horizon lined over the deserted beach.

Unsure of what he should do, Kenshin glanced at Kaoru as she sat like a stone, with her hands still tightly gripping the wheel. He shifted in the passenger seat and sighed to break the silence.

"So I guess we're here, huh?"_Baka what a stupid remark _he chided himself.

Kaoru nodded, "Uh-huh." She reached over for the urn, "I'll take that now."

"I can carry it for you," Kenshin insisted but she shook her head.

"I'll carry it out to the place on the beach we all used to go. I still remember exactly where it is and I know that's where he sprinkled my mom's ashes because it was her favorite spot." She pulled the urn from him and opened her door to climb out of the car. Kaoru headed to the left of where the Celica was parked and toward a large sand bank, her raven hair whipping in the steady offshore wind.

Kenshin yanked open the his door and climbed out of the car to follow after her. Catching up quickly he asked, "Do you mind if I go with you, Kaoru?"

She did not turn nor did she miss a step as she began to climb the sand bank to head down to the shoreline. "Suit yourself."

They continued to scale the bank, walking along the wood planks that were placed for those heading to the beach to walk and then down the short set of stairs that led to the beach. Once there, she walked toward a line of dunes, her feet sinking into the soft sand. After walking about 15 minutes she stopped at the last dune, near a rock formation that jutted out into the sea.

"Is this where you want to scatter the ashes?" Kenshin wanted to know as he watched her lower the urn and carefully place it on the uneven sandy surface.

Kaoru said nothing as she rose and stared at a place nestled between the rocks and the large sand dune, like an alcove that afforded the place privacy. It was also shielded from the brisk sea breeze and crashing waves, like a natural shelter. Her eyes closed as she became lost in a memory…

_**It was a sunny day in mid July, a perfect day for the beach and it was full of folks that were there taking advantage of the balmy summer weather. That included the little family gathered by the dunes, a young couple stretched out in beach lounges while their small daughter was at the water's edge, digging in the sand to fill her pail. The child kept at her task until she suddenly discovered something that excited her. She leapt to her feet with her discovery and turned to where her parents rested.**_

**_"Okaa-san! Okaa-san!" The little girl with the inky pigtails and big blue eyes called out to the beautiful lady reclined on the beach chair, under the umbrella so her pale skin was protected from the hot sun._**

_**Kamiya Kiyomi smiled at her little daughter Kaoru and answered, "What is it, Kao-chan?"**_

_**The child scampered over and held out both chubby hands to her mother cradling a small conch shell. In her child's wonder she said in pure delight, "Look what I found! Isn't it pretty?"**_

_**Kiyomi took the shell and marvelled at its intricate beauty. It was smooth and colored in hues ranging from pale pink to rich coral, rare and quite a find. She smiled as she handed it to Kaoru and stated, "It surely is. Do you plan to keep it?"**_

_**The child shook her head as she said, "Uh-uh. I want to give it to Otou-san." Shyly she asked, "Do you think he'll like it?"**_

_**Kiyomi looked over to where her husband, Koshijiro was sitting, on another recliner set up in the sun dozing as he sunned himself. She sighed as she sensed his withdrawal from them, complaining about his lost time at the dojo when she had suggested a beach outing to relax. But once they arrived and she rubbed his back with suntan lotion, he had given in to his fatigue from overwork and slipped off into a much needed nap. **_

_**Kiyomi frowned as she thought about her husband's cool attitude towards their daughter. Although he was never unkind to her, he was not exactly affectionate acting as if he just tolerated her. It was something that irked and saddened Kiyomi because both Koshi and Kaoru were the two most important people in her life and she loved them deeply. **_

_**Kaoru saw her mother's expression and her own face fell as she picked up on the negative vibrations, very astute for a child of four. Her own features reflecting disappointment she said in a subdued manner, "I guess he won't want a shell, huh Okaa-san?"**_

_**Her round face looked sad and out of place in the bright rays of the day so Kiyomi reached and drew Kaoru into her arms. "He's sleeping now, koi. But when he wakes, I'm sure he would like it,' she reassured the little girl as her husband stirred and sat up when he awoke from his nap.**_

_**Kaoru saw her father wake and she slipped down from her mother's embrace. In her best grown-up manner she approached the man who peered at her from behind his sunglasses unsmiling. She held her arms behind her to hide the gift to give him.**_

_**"Otou-san?"**_

_**"Aa?" he answered as the little girl bit her lip nervously.**_

_**"I-I have a present for you," she stammered.**_

_**He replied, "Is that so?"**_

_**"Uh-huh. Here." Kaoru proffered the conch shell and offered it to him.**_

_**Koshijiro reached and took the shell in his hands, turning it about and examining it before he asked, "And why did you give me this, Kaoru?"**_

_**She looked at the sunglasses focused on her and answered, "B-because I thought it would give you luck, Otou-san." Kaoru lowered her head as she waited for approval that never would come.**_

_**From her lounger Kiyomi coughed and glared a warning over their daughter's head at her husband which he picked up and in return sighed in resignation. So to please his ailing wife, Koshijiro addressed his child.**_

_**"Arigatou."**_

_**Her little face broke a smile as Kaoru bowed and then turned and scampered back to the shore where her pail and shovel were waiting. Humming a tune, she plopped herself down and resumed digging, seemingly happy. Even at her tender age, Kaoru knew to hide her true feelings to her father, who was unemotional except when alone with her mother. . . **_

The memory faded while a breeze blew in from the sea, bringing Kaoru back to the present as she noticed the weather. The sky was showing the dark clouds breaking up and patches of blue showing through as crepuscular rays of the sun shone on the waves when they lapped the shore. She gazed up into the clouds as a gentle hand rested on her shoulder, startling her.

Kenshin leaned close to her ear and murmured, "You're a million miles away, tenshi. Are you okay?"

Kaoru turned her head and was face to face with his soft violet gaze, filled with compassion and….something else she could not fathom. Or was afraid to presume.

Nervous, she broke away and said matter-of-factly, "Hai, I'm fine, just thinking." She reached down for the urn and removed the cover. "I should start putting Otou-sama to rest."

Kaoru reached a hand inside the urn and took a handful of the fine dust that was once her father and tossed it up into the breeze as it blew toward the surf. It danced in the wind like a flurry of snow as it twirled and disappeared. She bowed her head and said a prayer as she took another to do the same.

_Sayonara, Otou-sama._ _I hope you have found happiness at last. Go and join Okaa-san in peace in the afterlife._

The only child of Kamiya Kiyomi and Koshijiro continued in the task of fulfilling her father's final wish, scattering his remains all along the little cove, the wind doing the job of assisting her as it took the ashes on its back and sent them into the sea. Kaoru watched as each handful vanished from her palm and the saltly breeze took her father to a place he loved.

Kenshin stood by and watched as Kaoru carried out the task, her face showing a mixture of fleeting emotions, but again she sought the shelter of her wall as she did as she was asked. His own heart was pained as he was stuck in neutral, wanting to offer a hand but sensing the need for her to do this alone. But he was exceedingly glad he had been stubborn and insisted on coming along so he was here for when he knew she would need him.

After a while, the urn was at last nearly empty, the last remnants at the bottom so Kaoru simply turned it over and let the wind take the rest of the fine dust, up and into the atmosphere to dissolve into nothing. Sighing, she replaced the cover and then going to where two rocks, one large and once smaller yet almost touching were joined together with a cord. There she knelt down and dug a hole with her hands, to make a place for the urn near where another, old and weathered was half interred. She placed the urn that had held her father's ashes next to the other, both flush to the base of the rock. She then pushed the sand against them to secure and protect them from the elements. Once that was done, Kaoru bowed her head once more to say a final prayer. After several minutes, she slowly rose and backed away to stare at the scene, clutching her shoulders.

Seeing the need to be close by Kenshin came over to her and stood by her side as she remarked casusally, "These rocks were important to my parents. My mother told me once that they came here all the time while they were engaged, and saw the two rocks as wanting to be together like them so my father took a cord and tied them together, like they were married." She gestured to the urns and added, "That's where my father scattered my mother's ashes when she died so it's only right that this be his final resting place."

Kenshin responded, "I agree."

Kaoru pointed to the joined rocks. "I always would stare at these rocks when I was little after my mother told me the story and I even imagined them kissing."

Kenshin nodded as he commented, "They do look like they belong together."

Kaoru went on in a faraway voice, "I even named them Altair and Vega after the two star lovers on Tanabata Day. Because they were so close, yet still apart."

Kenshin's amethyst orbs twinkled as he said, "Yet the cord binds them."

He gazed at Kaoru, whose face was veiled by her raven locks as the wind whipped it about and his heart caught at her sad expression. He stepped in front of her, placing his hands on her shoulders to look deep into her eyes reaching up and brushing the wind-swept strands back.

His tenderness was her undoing as the veneer shattered and her wall came tumbling down. Kaoru threw herself against him, sobbing, "Oh Kenshin!" She cried against his shoulder as he rhythemically caressed her, whispering words of comfort.

"Hush, aka-chan, I know, I know. It's going to be okay, shhh." Kenshin's arms tightened around her as his greatest desire became to take her sorrow away for all times.

In the redhead's arms Kaoru felt as if she had come home. It just felt so….right, being in Kenshin's embrace, hearing the steady and strong beat of his heart was like the calm after the storm. Like the brightening late afternoon sky after the day's deluge, his affection and warmth was welcome. Her emotions rose as her body began to get warmer with each of his caresses and her heart began to flutter as she became filled with want of him.

She drew her face away from his shoulder and as her eyes met his she moved closer, placing her lips softly on his in the softest kiss, teasing his mouth insistently to receive her as his eyes were widened in surprise at her boldness. But Kaoru was oblivious as she continued kissing Kenshin, her hands traveling down his chest to his waist and inside his pants with one hand as the other snaked around his torso and cupped his buttocks.

Kenshin was in a quandry. As always his body was responding to Kaoru's scent and softness but her aggressive caresses were sending his senses into overdrive. He was beyond aroused, getting harder with each touch but his head was clear and screaming common sense into his ears, that this was not right. She was not now nor had ever been an object of lust to him and he knew that if he did not act right away, he would be no more than a rutting animal as he pushed her down into the sand to take her. With every vestige of self-control he possessed, he took hold of her arms and pushed her away.

Gasping softly and in dismay Kaoru asked, "W-why did you push me away, Kenshin? What's wrong?"

But he turned away from those arresting orbs colored like the crashing waves and said brusquely, "This isn't right, not at all."

Kaoru's face fell as a cold chill gripped her heart. _Could I have been wrong about him? Are my feelings for him stronger than his for me? Or has he just felt sorry for me as a friend all this time?_

"G-gomen," she stammered.

Shamed and gripping her shoulders like a lost child she backed away from him, turned and ran as her eyes brimmed with tears, to get away as fast as she could.

Hearing the apology Kenshin whirled around in time to see Kaoru running away down the beach, her raven mane flying behind her like a frightened colt. Infuriated at himself and uttering a curse, he took off after her calling out her name on the wind.

"KAORU! KAORU, WAIT!" Kenshin sprinted after her, catching up to her and grabbing her arm to pull her to a stop. "Why did you run away from me?"

"Iie, iie, Let me go! Let me go!" She closed her eyes as tears streaked down her face and in his strong grip, pummeled at his chest. "Leave me alone!"

"Calm down, calm down, Kaoru!" Kenshin barked over her frenzied actions. "Kuso, will you talk to me?"

But she was not listening as she glared at him and railed, "If you don't want me just leave me alone, Kenshin." She burst into tears, covering her face with her hands as she said brokenly, "Just let me accept that I was wrong and that you don't want me."

Kenshin's eyes widened to violet saucers as he stared at her in shock. "Don't want you?" he said, incredulous.

She looked up and snapped, "Don't lie to me or say something you don't mean to make me feel good. Be honest with me, it's much kinder."

Kenshin blinked his eyes in total amazement. "Kaoru, I don't know what you're talking about, that I don't."

She looked away, shook her head and gave a bitter laugh. "Boy you must really be feeling sorry for me. All alone and so pathetic." Her tone dripped with self-loathing and Kenshin was filled with a sense of urgency to let her know his true feelings.

He slid his hands up to her shoulders and then with one hand took hold of her chin to raise and turn her tortured visage to him. "Listen to me. Onegai, believe me I'm very sorry for what I did just now. The last thing I want you to think is that I feel sorry for you. Because I don't."

Kaoru's eyes bore mixed emotions of uncertainty and hope, a poignant combination that tore at Kenshin as he continued…

"I do not now nor have I ever felt pity for you," he reiterated. "And if you'll think back to all our times together clearly, you'll see I am right."

Still unconvinced, she stared at him and he felt swept into the indigo depths as he sighed and went on.

"Kaoru, the day I first met you I knew something of great meaning had happened in my life. You were like a ray of light and understood me from our very first conversation," Kenshin recounted. Then his face darkened as he said, "I felt an immediate attraction to you but I was not free to act upon it so we became friends instead."

She watched as his explanation continued, "When the accident happened and Tomoe died, I fully blamed myself and wanted to die. I didn't care about anything and pushed everyone away from me, you included thinking that I was not worthy of any friendship or didn't deserve to have anyone care for me. But then I realized that was wrong and when I saw you at practice I wanted to apologize and reach out to you. After all the night of the accident, it was you, my good friend I turned to, knowing I could."

Kenshin took a deep breath as he released his hands and turned to stare at the pounding waves. "It was at that time things then switched, that you became the one who needed the support as you dealt with your own crisis with your father's accident. So I wanted to do for you what I had denied you, to be here to help you through a rough time. I mean, you had become one of my closest friends so that's what I wanted to do."

A large breaker crashing introduced the next statement. "But something was happening inside me, I was feeling things that had me thinking about you more and more. Now that I was free, it just seemed natural to think that way about you and I found myself wanting to be with you all the time. Yet, I knew that we both were hurting and so I felt and still feel that we need to move slowly as we both are grieving." He ran a nervous hand through his unruly titian hair as he added guiltily, "I'm still grieving."

Kaoru sighed as she said, "I understand."

Kenshin turned and got in front of her. "You just said that if I don't want you, that I should just tell you, that it would be kinder. And if that were the case I would say it without hesitation," he said clearly. "But let me say this. There is not one thing in this world I want more than to be with you. And not just as your friend."

Her eyes widened as his hands gently cupped her face. "I want to be with you, Kaoru. I never wanted anything more in my entire life. I want to hold you, caress you, and then kiss you until I take your breath away. I want to love you with everything in me, all night every night as I bury myself inside you and then wake up in the morning with you in my arms and love you all over again. I want to live with you, die with you, laugh with you, cry with you, kiss you until you stop crying then fill you up as I love you over and over."

He leaned in so they were a hair's width apart and murmured, "Aka-chan I can't lie, ninety nine percent of my thoughts are of making love with you but that's not all I want. I want to be a part of every aspect of your life, with the hope of sharing a future together. And that's why I pushed you away from me before, you had me so turned on that if I had let you go on, I would've lost control and completely ravaged you. But I don't want to reduce you to an outlet to satisfy my lust, you are so much more." He swallowed hard as he admitted, "I'm in love with you."

Kaoru's eyes filled with tears again as she whispered, "Oh Kenshin."

His own eyes softened to lavender as he leaned in and his mouth met hers, softly and tenderly, the tip of his tongue lightly tasting her lips as she gave a tiny moan and opened them to bid him in. But unlike her earlier kisses filled with desperation, his was one of sweet and gentle affection, unrushed and searing as it moved with deliberate slowness.

When they finally drew apart, the sun burst forth from behind the last dissipating cloud of the once stormy clime and enveloped the two in golden rays as it sank in the western horizon. Kaoru took a deep breath then as everything of the day caught up to her, her knees became weak and she collapsed into Kenshin's arms.

"Hmm," he said as with a soft smile he scooped her up and carried her over the sand and back to the car.

………………………………………………………………………………..

The next day, Kaoru was awakened by the sunlight streaming though the window slats, indicating the late morning hour. Gasping in alarm, she jumped up and hurried to the closet to quickly don her training gear and then ran out and headed to the practice hall.

_Kuso, I overslept! I had lessons this morning_ Kaoru berated herself as she tried to remember if she had set her alarm. Then she recalled the succession of unusual events that had taken place during the memorial and at the beach yesterday. She smiled as she remembered Kenshin's confession to her as the last thing before sheer exhaustion had claimed her.

_He must have put me to bed last night and decided to let me sleep _she surmised as she made her way down the hall. _But he knows I have to teach a class so he should've set my alarm_ she groused as she came to the hall outside. She stopped just at the shoji at the practice hall doorway and listened in as she heard the class already in progress with a familiar raspy tenor calling out directives.

"All right, minna get ready for hitikake-geiko with the partner you chose at the beginning of class."

Kenshin's voice rang with authority as the group of adolescent boys all obeyed with a sharp "Hai sensei!" making Kaoru smile as she leaned back, choosing to withdraw and let him run the class. She then brightened up as an idea came to her and scurried back to her room.

When she got there, Kaoru went to the drafting table set up and retrieved her sketch book, pencils and kneaded eraser. She then went back to the practice hall and entered unobtrusively to take a seat on the side, opening the book to a fresh page and studying her subject with a practiced eye, she began to draw. . . .

After the class had concluded, the group of boys noticed their pretty shishou, sitting quietly and concentrating on drawing and as Kenshin spotted the same he silently gestured for the boys to leave the hall quietly and leave Kaoru alone. When they had obeyed and filed out, he strolled over and addressed her.

"Are you feeling better today, aka-chan?" he asked solicitously, leaning down to place a hand on her shoulder.

"Uh-huh." Kaoru continued her task without looking up and added, "You should have waken me to teach."

"I know, but you were so exhausted after yesterday that I let you sleep and I taught the class." He added cheerfully, "After all you hired me as your assistant."

"Uh-huh."

Kaoru's pencil literally flew across the sheet as curiosity finally prompted Kenshin to peek down and see what she was drawing. His eyes widened as he saw she had several sketches of his facial expressions as he directed the class. She had made several drawings on the sheet and he was impressed by the skill by which she captured him, especially the intensity in his eyes.

Finished with the sketches at last, Kaoru leaned back and noticed Kenshin for the first time. Smiling warmly at him she said, "Ohayo, Kenshin. How was class?"

He grinned back as he said, "You were here so you tell me."

She said sheepishly, "I was too busy to pay attention. Gomen."

Kenshin leaned in as he asked, "And what is it that was keeping you so busy?"

"This." Kaoru turned the pad so he could see the drawings. As he examined the sketches closely she added, "I just remembered that we have a project to do so I'd better get started on it."

Kenshin's handsome face broke into a slow smile as he continued admiring her handiwork and nodded. "Uh-huh."

**NEXT……COLOR STUDY……LIFE GOES ON**


	11. Chapter 11 COLOR STUDY LIFE GOES ON

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Author's Note: Here's a chapter where I wanted to bring into play both the construction of the portrait and Kaoru's unresolved issues about the night she was attacked. Up to now, Kenshin's tenderness has kept thoughts of the ordeal away but now with him getting bolder, the feelings of fear are emerging. Also emerging is Kenshin's "dark side". I am refering to it that way because this is a modern A/U and although he is referred to as "Battousai" on the team, the name actually means "one who mastered battoujitsu" and his dark side is just his deadly hidden rage. And I just want to say I am overwhelmed by the response to this story—the 6860 hits on it by readers is wonderful as well as the 134 reviews—I am grateful.

As a side note---in the last chapter the letter written by Koshijiro to Kaoru was based on the AA based recovery process in alcoholism—in the threapy treatments, the alcoholic is directed to make amends and apologize to family and friends that they have hurt through their drinking—so although as a Japanese man he may not have been as open to his daughter (thus the letter) I wrote it as I remembered my father's recovery before he took his life and how he made amends to all of us. (thanks Gypsy-chan)

_**Glossary of Japanese and Kendo Terms**_

_**Bushido---The samurai way of honor**_

_**Oyasuminasai---Good night**_

_**Chudan-no-kamae -- the basic ready position with the shinai pointed at the opponents mid-upper section.**_

_**Hasso-no-kamae ---the ready position with the shinai held vertically by the right shoulder.**_

_**Jodan-no-kamae ---the ready position with the shinai held over the head.**_

_**Nito-no-kamae ---the ready position when using two shinai.**_

_**Zan-shin ---the follow through of a strike, a state of energy, execution, and alertness against an opponent.**_

_**Tsuki ---the throat thrust or hit.**_

**_Hashi---Chopsticks_**

**COLOR STUDY…..LIFE GOES ON**

The project of going on was now begun in earnest as Kaoru stepped forward bravely and accepted that for the most part, she was now entirely on her own. Her father had left the dojo and its assets all to her as his daughter, so expenses for his memorial were paid in full. However, that had just left her a small portion that made it plain she would have to keep the dojo working in order to survive. Her aim and objective was clear, she would carry on the Kamiya Kasshin legacy by becoming the new shishou of the sword style but with regret she put her own ambitions of being a commercial artist aside. The existing students of the dojo pledged to remain even with their sensei gone, not only to honor his daughter but because she had inherited his gift of teaching. Her manner was firm but fair and respect and admiration of her expertise was apparent in the way she conducted the classes for they were lively and well attended.

Yet she continued in her project for the portrait class, and as she continued sketching Kenshin, she also turned a room at the dojo on the sunny side into a studio. Her art table and easel were set up with an array of pencils, paints, and brushes as well as the materials for stretching canvas. As a true artist, Kaoru preferred stretching her own canvases and when not teaching kendo classes, she was sequestered in her studio nightly, preparing the canvas for the portrait and going through sketches to chose the ones that best depicted her subject.

And in the meantime her subject, the amiable redhead had made himself a staple at the dojo, staying there almost all the time while attending his classes at the university. Then when he returned in the afternoon and evening Kenshin conducted classes at the dojo while Kaoru worked on the roughs for her portrait and spent time in the darkroom at school to develop the rolls of photographs she took of him. He had even curtailed his time at the campus radio station, just going on the air once a week.

It was about an hour after sunset one night when finished with teaching the last kendo class in the dojo, Kenshin made his way to the studio room, wanting to see Kaoru. Stopping before the shoji, he knocked on the wood frame gently.

"Come in," came the muffled reply so he slid the portal open and entered the room.

Kaoru was on the tatami, with several sheets of charcoal sketches and 8 x 10 photos around her and she sat cross legged with a large pad on her lap, intently drawing as she rifled through the sketches and photos The room was brightly lit with the overhead flourescent lights and the overhead light on the drawing table. She had soft music playing in the background, some light jazz that added to the creative atmosphere in the studio.

"Hi Kenshin." She did not even look up as she continued working and he came over to squat down beside her.

"How's it going?" he asked as he picked up a photo of himself that he had not seen before, one she probably took when he was at work in the dojo, leading a class. He was a bit unnerved by the many images of him scattered about her work area.

"Oh, okay I guess. I'm getting the final composition of the portrait in a rough before I stretch and prepare the canvas."

Kenshin grinned as he commented, "You're quite ambitious, stretching your own canvas, Kaoru. Most people just buy it ready made."

"Yeah, I know but this is not going to be a conventional size, it's going to be more horizontal because I plan to use many different angles of you in this." Kaoru continued to draw as she spoke, her concertration on her task unwavering.

Curious, he leaned over and inquired, "Mind if I take a look?"

Still hard at work she shook her head as she replied, "Suit yourself."

Kenshin leaned even closer as he studied the evolving work on Kaoru's pad. His violet eyes widened as he saw a montage of images, all different yet at the same time all related by a common thread that seemed to focus the viewer's attention on his eyes. For in each image the eyes were the most prominent feature, reflecting all different emotions. She had different head shots, taken from her sketches and photos that he remembered being the model for but then there was the central shot, one that caught him completely by surprise as it was a picture of him from which he did not remember posing or being present. But what was truly amazing was the way he was portrayed, with such a sense of sadness that his heart contricted at being so.

He said in a voice tinged with awe, "You're amazing, aka-chan. This looks incredible."

"So far." She was unconvinced as she leaned back and examined her work critically. "But I'm still having a hard time getting exactly what I want for this."

"And what's that?"

Kaoru gazed at him and said softly, "You."

Kenshin chuckled as he said, "Me? You already have me, koibito." He reached an arm around her and planted a kiss on her cheek and added, "In more ways than one."

Her face lit up with pleasure as she responded, "Arigatou, Kenshin-kun. But what I want is to dip into the deep well of your soul. It's there I want to see just what is the cause of your sadness."

Kenshin squeezed her shoulder as he denied, "I'm not sad, aka-chan, not since I've been here with you."

Kaoru shook her ebony head. "Iie, that's not true."

"Sure, it is," he said with a pleasant grin.

Kaoru sighed, "I don't believe you."

"Are you calling me a liar?" His flame brows arched as he pinned her with his amethyst gaze.

She became nonplussed. "Of course not! It's just that I see sadness deep inside you Kenshin, sadness that has been there even before the accident. It's something I saw from the moment I first met you."

Feeling uncomfortable at her dead on accurate impression, the redhead removed his arm from her and leaned back with a bemused expression on his even features. Kenshin felt naked; exposed and yet at the same time, a sense of tranquility as he knew instinctively that out of everyone in his life, it was this woman with which he could trust to really open up.

He sighed and said a bit releuctantly, "I try not to show it but I guess I can't hide anything from you, huh?"

Kaoru hastened to reassure him. "We're too alike, Kenshin. I try to do the same thing, hide my true feelings from everyone but you managed to see right through me." She moved the pad aside as she scooted over and faced him. Kaoru then reached and took his face in her hands.

"Kenshin, after my father died, you reached out to me even when I tried to lock myself away from everyone and I know you do the same. The day I wanted to go alone to the beach to scatter my father's ashes you sensed I needed you and insisted going with me. I let you in so let me in, onegai?"

Kenshin looked into the indigo pools that were like an ocean, deep penetrating and yet soft with promises, promises he knew that would never be broken. There was safety and comfort just waiting for him there and it caused his heart to pound as he felt himself relaxing and allowing Kaoru to work her spell on him. He leaned closer as their mouths sought each other in a kiss.

Work forgotten for the moment, Kaoru slid herself between Kenshin's legs, moving her hands from his face to his shoulders as his arms enfolded her, his hands laced in her midnight strands as he deepened the kiss. Getting on his knees, he maneuvered her around, taking the lead as he pushed her down on the tatami, with the myriad of sketches and photos scattered around them. Moaning softly, Kenshin continued with his kiss, entering her mouth and probing deep, tasting the wild honey of Kaoru as she did the same, savoring the taste of him while he took her breath away.

Gasping she pulled away as Kenshin continued his assault, leaving little nibbling kisses on her earlobe and neck, driving her to dizzying heights as his hands slipped beneath her sweater and on her breasts. They were gently insistent and they tried to free her from the garment as she felt herself giving in to his tender demands.

Then out of nowhere a picture came to mind; a memory long dormant and thought forgotten as Kaoru was transported back to the night Tobei tried to force his unwanted amorous attentions on her. . . .

"_**C'mon Kaoru, you know you want it. Even if you don't have a boyfriend, I can see you're a passionate lady and I'm just the man to appreciate it."**_

_**"Onegai, don't…," Kaoru protested but Tobei cut off her words with his mouth, grabbing her in a vice like grip and then groping her, his hands on her breasts as she struggled in rising fear.**_

_**She tried to break free from the insistent man but he was too aroused and tried to further his base desires by pushing her up against the wall, trapping her while his hand pinched and pulled causing Kaoru to panic and she began to fight him, pushing at him with all her might to no avail until she bit down on his lip as he was kissing her. Tobei yelped in pain letting go of her and then when she fled, he ran and grabbed her, backhanding her viciously, sending her sprawling into the kitchen. There Kaoru had picked up the mop handle and executed some Kamiya Kasshin chudan no kamae strikes to momentarily stun him and make her getaway.**_

"Iie," Kaoru murmured as she pushed out of Kenshin's arms, her eyes wide like a frightened deer. She scrambled to her feet and turned away as he sat back dumbfounded with his own face showing dismay.

"Kaoru? Koibito, what's wrong?" he asked as he rose and strode over to her, grasping her shoulders as she recoiled and moved away. He was alarmed by her response and demanded, "Talk to me!"

"Gomen, g-gomen," she whispered as tears flowed in her shame, her slender shoulders huddled and quivering.

In light of her invitation to him before Kenshin was absolutely stunned by her sudden manner, as if she were terrified of him and it made his blood run cold. He made to reach out for her to offer comfort but hesitated as her reaction to his kiss still rattled him.

"Kaoru, are you okay?"

She made a sound halfway between a sob and a sigh and then turned around to face him with a too bright smile, the tracks of her tears still evident as her eyes glistened. She stepped away still holding her arms and said lowering her head to avoid his gaze, "Hai, forgive me. I'm just tired."

But Kenshin was too worried and too used to Kaoru's coping mechanism to buy her excuse. He got right in front of her and gently raised her lowered head to meet his questioning eyes.

His voice was warm as he said, "Tenshi, onegai tell me what's wrong."

Kaoru looked into the warmth radiating from his expression as he waited patiently for her answer and felt guilt overtake her fear. She whispered, "I-I can't."

"Why not?"

Her voice wavered as she replied, "I-I just can't….onegai, believe me Kenshin, if I could tell you I would. B-but I can't." She buried her head in his shoulder and asked, "Onegai, understand."

Kenshin's arms wrapped around Kaoru and he said, his voice catching, "I do, aka-chan." He pulled her back and added, "But let me ask you something. Do you trust me?"

She bit her lip and nodded, "Hai I do."

His raspy tenor became tender as he continued, "And you remember what I said to you that day on the beach? Do you believe that I love you?"

Kaoru's eyes never left Kenshin's. "Uh-huh."

He pulled her close again and murmured in her ear. "Then know this. I would do ANYTHING for you, Kaoru. And I want…no make that _need _to know about anything that causes you pain so I can remove it from you…forever. Do you believe that?"

She pulled back to meet his fierce amethyst gaze and nodded.

He said quietly, "You knocked at my door and when I opened up to let you in, you ran away from me. And for quite some time now, we've been…well, you know we haven't exactly just been holding hands."

She turned her head and nodded. "I-I know."

"Come with me."

Kenshin then took Kaoru by the hands and guided her to sit with him on the tatami, by an open window where the balmy spring breeze drifted to them as the pinpoint glow of fireflies swayed past. Still holding her hands, he looked deep into her eyes snd then made his request.

"Kaoru-tenshi," he began, "Onegai, tell me what it was that frightened you so that you pulled away from me."

She clutched his hands and pleaded, "Forgive me, Kenshin."

"Always, aka-chan. Just talk to me." The redhead's eyes were patient but relentless and his demeanor was solemn.

Having no other choice, she answered, "I-I was remembering when I was attacked."

Kenshin's face darkened to a frown as he asked, "The night Tobei broke into your dorm room?"

"H-how did you know?" she asked, eyes wide in shock.

"Misao told me that night at **_Guido's_** when he came up to our table and threatened you. After you split, I asked her who the creep was and she told me so don't get mad at her."

Kaoru lowered her head and bit her lip again. "So you've known all this time."

Kenshin nodded but added, "Not the whole story. She said that I should ask you. So that's what I'm doing now." He leaned forward and looked right into her troubled eyes. "Tell me all of what really happened that night, Kaoru."

Pinned by his earnestness with no escape, Kaoru swallowed hard as she began, "Well, it was like this…,"

As she began to reveal her story he continued to listen intently, recalling how Misao had mentioned about Tae's good intentions and her boyfriend's friend who could not take no for an answer in his pursuit of Kaoru. But when she began to tell of the actual incident and he saw the naked terror in her haunted eyes, Kenshin found himself filling with a cold yet thobbing fury and his eyes began to turn amber with his heightened emotions. The kendo champion then felt a growing deep desire to go out and violently end Tobei's life. And as the story was concluded Kenshin was no longer listening but instead began to devise different plans to actually carry his desire out, one more gory than the next. His head lowered, he hid his eyes behind his overgrown bangs as he relished the thoughts.

Noticing his distracted manner, Kaoru began to worry as she hesitantly tapped him on the leg. "K-Kenshin? Are you okay?"

"I'm fine."

She gasped as he raised his head slowly and she saw that his eyes had changed color and that his usually placid face bore a cold, almost emotionless look that caused her heart to pound in trepidation. Gone was the gentle red-haired friend who stood by her these weeks as her life was turned upside down and now she felt she was staring at the feral visage of a predator. She shivered as she made to pull her hand away but found it in a vise-like grip.

"Kaoru," he said softly, deadly. "I promise you he will NEVER bother you again." He rose to his feet and pulled her up with him, without letting go.

"Kenshin, I-it's okay. I'll be..," she stammered but he cut her off by dropping her hand and striding to the door.

"I'm going to bed now. Oyasuminasai." He left the room without turning to look at her and she involuntarily shivered as she remembered the narrowed death glare. . . .

As he entered his room and slammed the shoji shut, Kenshin took a deep breath to dispel the burning rage that had overtaken him. The picture, burned in his head since the night he first saw him at **_Guido's _**had angered him because of her fear Now as he thought of Tobei as he tried to violate the woman he now loved the sheer rage he felt was making that task close to impossible to accomplish. Stripping down to his underwear he went to the futon and laid down to try to gain some control over his temper and turning out the light, he stared off as sleep eluded him. Then his mind's eye dwelled upon the beautiful object of his affection and finally the fiery fury died down to smoldering embers. He also thought about the interlude on the beach and how since that memorable day, they had both been closer then ever which warmed his heart. But he had to admit at the same time as the upsetting occurrence tonight proved, they both still were holding back, keeping from trusting each other completely as a way to protect themselves from any kind of hurt, real or imagined. It was a time tested safety valve for them both which was becoming an obsolete and an unwanted obstacle, one he intended to remove. He then drifted off to sleep.

…………………………………………………………………………….

The next day there was only one morning class at the dojo, so in the afternoon Kenshin and Kaoru took the opportunity to spar as they prepared for the upcoming kendo tournament for the national championship. The university team had been the class of the season, winning all but one match which had been a draw and Baisotei-sensei had his team razor-sharp and honed to take the title so practices were spirited and frequent. Although she had technically dropped out of school, Baisotei-sensei, Kenshin, and Aoshi had all encouraged Kaoru to remain on the team, her excellent skills a necessity to them, so she participated in practices and even offered the dojo as a place to have extra practice sessions. And this afternoon, the dojo was full, with Aoshi, Yahiko, and Saito all gathered around to practice for the tourney. Along the sides of the practice hall, there was an audience as Misao, Sanosuke, and Megumi all were seated to watch.

Aoshi and Yahiko were sparring partners practicing with Aoshi in a nito no kamae stance with two shinai as Yahiko countered with a hasso no kamae before they both went at each other in a lively match. Over on the other end Kaoru and Kenshin were squared off with each other, wielding bokken as they prepared to spar, both faces impasive yet concealing the tumultous emotions raging beneath. The bizarre turn of events of the previous evening had served to make the couple wary of each other, which had created an atmosphere between them that was thick with uncertainty. Both had awakened that morning and after perfunctory greetings shared a strained silent meal before Kenshin left for his classes leaving Kaoru in pensive, brooding quiet until her kendo class began.

That mood was still present in Kaoru's thoughts as she faced her best friend and the man she loved. They were in tumult; mixed with feeling shame and the need to apologize for her recoiling from him last night as her buried demons from the attack resurrected themselves during the kiss and caused all the trouble. In addition, she could not quell the cold trickle of fear that stayed with her after his "transformation". She was not quite sure how to approach Kenshin now and that truly disconcerted her.

For Kenshin's part as he watched her get into position to take him on he felt her fear toward him and it both saddened and irked him. Truth was, he was deeply, hopelessly in love with Kaoru but her pulling away from his embrace last night hurt more than he had let on and the rage he felt toward the bastard Tobei had unleashed the dark spirit within him he always fought to keep firmly under wraps. And that rage was now bubbling to the surface, reflected in his gold tinted orbs.

Saito as captain of the team acted the part of sensei as he commanded, "All right all of you, let's get ready. The tournament's in a week and right now we need to tighten up, you're all looking sloppy. Especially you, Himura, that last series was pathetic."

Kenshin scowled darkly as he bit out, "Kiss my ass, Saito."

But the ookami grinned evilly as he continued goading his adversary. "Maybe because Kamiya-san is your latest piece, you can't get it up to fight her." The room echoed with shocked gasps as everyone reacted to Saito's audacity.

That did it. The pulsing rage that had percolated at the surface of the redhead's psyche since its awakening last night burst forth like an erupting volcano, evidenced by the narrowed amber tint of his eyes and the coldly deadpan expression on his face.

"Shut up and start the match, ookami," Kenshin growled as he faced Kaoru, now no longer his beloved but his opponent and enemy as he got into a jodan no kamae.

_That's the same look he had last night! _Kaoru said in alarm to herself as she followed suit getting into the same position. Her heart pounding, she steeled herself as years of dealing with her difficult father had taught her well to subjugate her emotions in times of danger.

Seeing Kenshin's manner and relishing what was about to unfold the ookami allowed a sly grin to curl his lips. Thoroughly enjoying himself, Saito called out the command to begin. "Hajime!"

Over at his side, Kenshin was engulfed in a haze, one that veiled the reality before him and had the view of his opponent as a dark shadow, a nonentity that meant nothing to him except an enemy to be defeated. He crouched with his left foot forward to unleash his supernatural speed and then it happened….

Through the fog of fury, a vision of a field of irises on a sunny day flashed with a pair of sapphire eyes that rivaled the hue of the blooms dancing in the breeze. Then another picture, this time a wind-swept beach where those jewel eyes glistened with tears, framed by flying ebony strands and for a split second his mind cleared. Out of the vague shadow that was his opponent emerged Kaoru, his Kaoru….

Straightening up and lowering his bokken, Kenshin walked over to the still ready Kaoru and placed a hand on her shoulder, turning her around and pushing her firmly but gently to the side.

Puzzled by his action, Kaoru asked, "Kenshin?"

"Go," was his soft command. He then took the bokken from her and pushed her over to where Misao sat in astonishment, with his hand on her back.

Numb and in stunned dismay she saw his demeanor and frightened by it she complied. He then turned to Saito and holding the bokken he took form her, he tossed it at him and said in a hard voice. "You're my opponent, ookami."

Saito sneered, "I'm running the practice, Himura."

"I don't care," Kenshin countered. "Pick up the sword and fight me."

Saito's narrow caramel eyes hardened and gleamed as he grinned a slow nasty grin. "Have it your way Himura, if you think you can take me on." He picked up the bokken and stepped into position.

Kenshin resumed his stance and waited as Saitou barked at Aoshi, "Shinomori, you give the command."

Aoshi came to stand between them and then called out "Hajime!"

At that command, Kenshin shot forward as Saito turned to dodge the attack, his own bokken held in a chudan no kamae as he made to counter but Kenshin's speed was such that the kendo team captain's zan-shin was affected and made insignificant as then, the redhead appeared behind him as if by magic. There, he swung the bokken in a vicious tsuki and not expecting the blow Saito went down, his bokken clattering on the wood floor.

An amazed murmur went through the room as Kenshin turned and stood waiting and Aoshi said sharply "Yame!" to end the match.

But Saito got slowly to his hands and knees as he struggled to get up. His face bore the sight trace of a savage smile, like the snarl of a wolf. He began to laugh.

Not seeing the humor and still in his fierce manner Kenshin barked, "Can the laughing and get back up so I can knock you on your ass again." His amber orbs were slitted as the scar on his cheek became more vivid.

Megumi's sherry eyes widened as she grasped Sanosuke's arm. "Is that really Ken-san? He's a whole different person."

Sano just grunted as he stared at his buddy, knowing what had happened and wondering just what could have caused the emergence of Kenshin's dark side.

Horrified, Kaoru breathed, "Kenshin…"

But the titian haired man with the eerie amber eyes ignored everything and everyone but his prey, the now standing but still shaky Saito, who had retrieved his dropped bokken and turned to face him. Still grinning he addressed Kenshin.

"Not bad, Himura. But you didn't get me so the match isn't over yet."

He crouched into a fighting stance, holding the bokken in hasso no kamae, with one hand outstretched and held against it. He then shot forward and thrust the weapon forward, catching Kenshin in his chest, ramming him back and into the dojo wall where he collapsed like a rag doll. Everyone gasped as for a short moment, Kenshin appeared to be unconscious.

"Kenshin!" Kaoru cried but at her summons he pushed himself up and rose slowly, his head down and his eyes obscured by his overgrown bangs. He then retrieved his bokken and then headed back to the combat area when Aoshi stood before him to block his way.

"Yame! The match is over." His tone was firm.

Yahiko snapped, "Aoshi's right. This is just practice and you guys are trying kill each other. Save the anger for the tournament before you end up trashing the place."

Saito grunted as he took a deep breath to dispel his own aches from the strike Kenshin had dealt to him. He dropped the bokken as he acquiesced, "Fine. The match is over. Collect the bokken and let's call it quits."

Yahiko and Aoshi both went and gathered up the bokken as the tense atmosphere from the apparent death match eased and everyone cooled down from the practice session.

Always the cordial hostess Kaoru sprang forward and announced with a smile, "Matte, come and have something to eat, we have snacks waiting in the other room with some tea." She gestured to her friend, "C'mon Misao, help me set it up."

"Okay, Kaoru-chan." She glanced at Kenshin as she followed her friend out the door.

"I'll help too," Megumi offered as she exchanged a glance with Sano and then also left the men to themselves as Sano approached his friend Kenshin with caution.

He tapped him on the shoulder. "Yo, buddy what's shakin'? You okay?" He leaned in and peered at Kenshin, who seemed in a trance, unresponsive then he raised his head and and made his way to Saito.

The wolf cast a bored eye at the diminutive redhead and said, "You got something to say?"

Kenshin's eyes glittered gold malice as he growled, "If you EVER say anything as vulgar as what you just said concerning me and Kaoru again, I'll kill you."

Saito scoffed, "You threatening me?" Another gauntlet tossed by the master antagonist.

But instead of biting Kenshin turned to head out of the practice hall. He spoke bluntly without bothering turn around, "That's not a threat, it's a promise."

He continued out as Saito snorted in dersion. . . .

Outside, unknown and undetected, Tobei had been concealed by shrubbery and watched the procedings through a small tear in the rice paper of the shoji with a fiendish glee as his insane eyes spotted his quarry and made an ominous promise _Soon, Kaoru, soon. And nobody, not even some crazed shrimp kendo star with red hair is going to help you._ He got up and scurried to his waiting pickup truck parked in the alley. . . .

Over in the dining room, Misao, Megumi and Kaoru all finished setting out the food as Aoshi, and Yahiko came in and the latter attacked the table voraciously, garnering a whack on his spiky head from Kaoru. Since joining the kendo team she and the volatile young man had a love/hate relationship of mutual respect since she was the daughter of a dojo master and he was the descendant of a samurai and they had sparred often, challenging each other.

"Owww! What was that for, busu?" the youth groused, using the nickname he called her in battles.

"Just cool it and leave some for the others," she admonished as he muttered under his breath. She sat down on a cushion beside him with furrowed brow as she stared off into space.

Noticing her troubled expression, Yahiko inquired in concern, "You okay?"

"Huh? Kaoru turned to him with a blank look which caused him to worry more. He put his hashi down and pinned her with a direct chocolate gaze that got though to her somewhat. She shrugged and said brightly, "Hai, I'm fine."

"Yeah right," Yahiko snorted as he picked up his meal to resume eating but continued watching her surrepticiously as her smile faded as quickly as it appeared and she resumed brooding.

Sanosuke then entered the room and commented heartily, "Boy, what a spread. Jou-chan, you're the hostess with the mostest." He leaned over to grab some tempura and got his hand slapped by his girlfriend Megumi.

"Watch your manners, tori-atama," she scolded. "At least use the hashi, not your fingers, like a normal human being."

"Okay mom." He laughed and ducked as she swung at him, then plopped down by Kaoru. He playfully nudged her shoulder and asked, "What's the deal, Jou-chan? You're really quiet, for you. So what's up?"

Kaoru turned to answer when at that same moment Kenshin's slight form silouhetted in the door as he too entered the dining room and without looking at anyone, seated himself in an empty area of the table, away from everyone, staring straight ahead with narrowed eyes. She felt another icy finger of fear skitter up her spine as she watched him.

"Sano, you got a minute? I-I need to talk to you," Kaoru leaned over and murmured to Kenshin's buddy, never taking her eyes from the redhead.

Sano's eyes followed Kaoru's as he said, "Sure Jou-chan. What's on your mind?"

Kaoru glanced about furtively. "Not here. Come out to the courtyard with me."

"Okay." The duo got up and as they did, all other eyes were focused on them.

Misao spoke first, "Hey guys where ya going?" But Kaoru flashed a pseudo sunny smile and shrugged her slim shoulders.

"Oh nothing really. Just chatting." She glanced at Megumi and assured her, "I promise I'll bring him right back." She then grabbed Sano's arm and propeled him out to the courtyard as everyone watched thm leave then exchanged glances.

"I wonder what that's about," Misao asked as the rest shrugged and resumed eating except for the owner of amber eyes that glared out the door coldly, his face in a dark scowl. . .

Once outside, Kaoru pulled Sano over to the storehouse and glancing around began, "Sano, you've known Kenshin for a long time, right?"

The tall lanky man replied, "Yeah, why?"

Kaoru leaned forward. "D-do you know about….him?"

Sano chuckled, "Sure I do, Jou-chan. And so do you now."

She shook her head. "Iie I don't, not the Kenshin I saw last night and just now in the dojo. Didn't you see what happened in there?"

Sano closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Yeah I saw it."

Kaoru was getting impatient. "So tell me…what is that all about? Why does he get that way, like he's some kind of….,"

"Monster? Animal? Machine?" he finished for her.

Sano eyed her as flustered, Kaoru blushed as she had been thinking that very thing. The fierce look on the face that had epitomized gentle strength had made her fearful and now even with the truth of her love for him, she was having serious doubts.

Sanosuke sighed and took hold of her elbow to guide her to the steps of the storeroom. "Sit down, Jou-chan. Considering how close you both are I thought Kenshin would have told you himself about…his dark side."

Kaoru's eyes became sapphire pools. "His dark side?"

"Uh-huh." Sano ran a hand through his unruly umber hair as he continued, "Kenshin was an orphan at eight when his folks were killed in an accident. He had no other relatives so he was put in an orphanage that was basically a garbage pit. He had nothing; hardly any clothes, and barely enough food to eat. And because he has red hair and violet eyes, he was picked on by all the other kids who figured he was a foreigner and let's face it he doesn't look Japanese. The directors of the hole just turned their heads and did nothing while he would get the crap kicked out of him almost everyday."

Deeply saddened and feeling the pain of the lonely, unwanted boy Kaoru's eyes welled up as she whispered, "Poor Kenshin!"

"And to make things worse, he never cried out or gave the bullies any satisfaction in seeing him feeling anything. He just took it."

"Ohh." The tears were now flowing in earnest as Kaoru sat tranfixed.

Sano continued, "One day, the older kids took him outside and were really working him over, he was bruised and half dead when Hiko drove by and saw what was going on. He stopped and rescued Kenshin, went to the orphanage, slapped a wad of bills down and took him home to Kyoto where he was a reclusive but well known ceramic artist. After about a month he had his lawyer make it offical by filing adoption papers and he made Kenshin his son."

Kaoru remained quiet and attentive as Sano sighed and went on.

"But Hiko's not the warmest or loving guy and he immediately thought that Kenshin, because he was so small needed to 'toughen up' so as a former sword master, he began to teach him the Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. He also taught him bushido, and that's where Kenshin got his sense of honor. But as he taught him more swordsmanship, he noticed something strange in Kenshin, a dark side that was completely emotionless began to come out during the training. His whole face would change, especially his eyes and he told me he would 'black out'."

"Black out?"

Sano nodded. "He would block out everything but who he was fighting and then would be like a robot, just slashing and hitting with such cold fierceness till the person he fought was defeated and sometimes almost dead. This not only happened while he was living with Hiko, it began happening every time he fought in kendo classes and matches and even began spilling over into his manner at school getting into fights all the time and really hurting some guys. Kenshin had a hell of a time stopping it. Until…,"

Kaoru inquired, "Until what?"

Sano looked at the raven haired girl that loved Kenshin so and swallowed hard. "Until he met Tomoe. When he met her, she got through to him like nothing else and through her, he began to turn more towards the light."

"I see." Kaoru was subdued as she thought of the beautiful departed Tomoe and felt envious of her apparent ability to affect Kenshin.

"Kenshin told me all about how she understood him, having experienced the deaths of her own parents when she was a kid, they had been kindred souls. So they fell in love and were planning to get married. Then…,"

"The accident happened," Kaoru finished softly.

"Yeah." Sano leaned back and then went on. "He really retreated into the dark then. I had never seen anything like that in him before and I've been pals with him since junior high. I guess that's why he never called you back when you'd call him, he just was…scary. When he wasn't getting drunk or ballin' every chick he could pick up, he was getting into these really nasty fights at the bars and puttin' a hurtin' on any fool that looked at him the wrong way. It's a wonder he didn't end up in the slammer. Then everything happened with you and he became the old Kenshin again. So here we are."

Kaoru took a long breath as she digested every shocking detail that she had heard. It was quite the revelation and such a paradox from the kind, gentle, and loving man who had done everything he could to take her pain away. The fact that he himself was drowning in a murky river of sadness and just pushed through it to meet her needs touched her deeply.

Sano then looked right at Kaoru and asked bluntly, "Answer me this if you can. Why is he reverting to the dark side now? What happened between you two?"

Kaoru bit her lip and lowered her head in shame. "I-I'd rather not talk about it."

Sano frowned and sighed, "Okay, okay. I won't snoop 'cause it's really none of my business." He got up and turned toward the dojo. "We'd better get back before the kitsune sends a search party for me." He offered a hand to help Kaoru to her feet.

She nodded and taking the offer got up and came to him. She then turned to Sanosuke and hugged him, tears flowing once more. "A-arigatou, Sano-kun. For telling me this and helping me to see Kenshin clearly."

He hugged her back and said, "Anytime, Jou-chan." He pulled away to look right into her eyes. "Don't be afraid of him, Kaoru. He needs you to bring the light back into his life and whatever happened to drag him back in the dark, don't let it. Because if the dark completely takes over we could lose him forever."

He took her elbow and they walked back to the dojo. . . .

About an hour later, everbody had left and Kaoru was in the dining room, cleaning up with Kenshin who was uncommunicative as he mechanically helped. Kaoru ventured some small talk but he did not respond and so they just kept working together, bringing the dishes to the kitchen for washing. Once in there Kaoru stood by the sink and rinsed the dishes to put into the dishwasher as Kenshin handed them wordlessly, not even looking at her. Her nerves and the dishes both at an end, she decided to break the unofficial oath of silence between them.

"Kenshin, what's wrong?"

He said nothing, just continued handing teacups and silverware to her.

She sighed and tried again. "Okay, what did I do then?"

Still, not a word. Getting annoyed by his continuing reticence, Kaoru threw down the spoons he had handed her with a clatter and turned to her friend, grasping his shoulders and confronting him straight on.

"Okay Kenshin. The vow of silence is now declared over. I want to know why you're giving me the cold shoulder and now." Her tone brooked no disobedience and he looked back at her, his golden eyes penetrating as he responded.

"Why did you take off with Sanosuke for so long?" His tone was low and although not threatening, it was cold and hard.

_Oh I get it, he's ticked about that _she was slightly uneasy by the stony glare but undaunted she pushed on. "It was no big deal, I just wanted to ask him something."

"About me?"

Kaoru met his stare and nodded. "I wanted to know what was going on with you. To be honest, since last night, I've been kind of scared to talk to you."

At her admission Kenshin turned from her and said in a low tone, "You should have just come to me and asked your questions."

She challenged him. "Would you have answered me?"

"Of course." He turned back to face Kaoru but his eyes were still narrow golden slits. "I trust you."

His words did not reflect his expression so she was unconvinced. She sighed as she said, "I asked Sano about this….manner you have when you get angry, to try to understand you." She came closer as she continued, "Since what happened between us last night you've….changed."

Kenshin stepped back and his right hand balled into a fist, causing Kaoru's heart to pound as she began to think wildly _What is he doing? I-is he going to…?_

But what happened next completely surprised her as he punched his forehead with enough force to cause a thin trickle of blood to flow down his fist and along the line of his nose to the corner of his mouth. He removed his fist and his eyes which had been closed opened, deep violet pools as he shook his head to clear it.

Kenshin then gazed at Kaoru and said softly, "Forgive me for scaring you, aka-chan. I am truly sorry, that I am."

Kaoru took a shaky but relieved breath as she saw the return of her Kenshin and without a word, she reached for a paper towel, went to the sink to dampen it, and came over to him. She rested her left hand on his cheek and with her right hand, dabbed at the blood on his face to clean it away.

Kenshin sighed and closed his eyes, savoring her tender touch and as she pulled her hand away, as he did once before he grabbed hold of it and turning his head so his lips could graze the palm, kissed it. He opened his eyes and focused them on hers.

"Arigatou. Kaoru-tenshi."

She smiled the smile that always warmed his heart as she continued the task. . . .

Later, in her studio, Kaoru was seated on the tatami, her sketchbook on her lap as pictures of a Kenshin she had not known before flashed in her head and she was driven by an unknown but potent force to record them for use in the portrait. Her pencil dashed across the paper and she worked well into the night. . .

**NEXT……BLOCKING…..BATTLES AHEAD**


	12. Chapter 12 BLOCKING BATTLES AHEAD

_Author's Note: Forgive the late update, life became rather hectic and writing became low on my list of priorities. But things are improving and since I have only one other story I'm working on I will try to be more timely. That done, this chapter is taking the story into a darker direction, the plot pretty much heading in the way Kenshin's dark side will be emerging in the next chapter and segue into the second part of the story. And this chapter is dedicated to my good friend RedLion2, who is one of the few writers I know that has raised A/U writing to an art form. Thank you all readers and reviewers for making this story my most popular story to date._

_**Glossary of Japanese terms**_

_**Shimatta----Damn it**_

_**Hentai----Pervert**_

**BLOCKING…..BATTLES AHEAD**

Now that another barrier had been breached between them, Kaoru and Kenshin entered into a new level of trust in their growing relationship. And it had happened at the most opportune time, as Kaoru was deeply into the creation of her portrait and they were spending every spare moment together. This day there were no kendo classes scheduled so they were working on the portrait.

The artist in Kaoru was in her element, intently portraying the essence of her subject, a young man that was multi-faceted and multi-layered having many personas, some she had seen and knew and some she had never seen before. Admittedly, she was still a bit frightened by what had happened in the dojo during the practice and in her studio but being the resilient person she was, Kaoru had accepted it as a part of the man she loved. And she discovered she was indeed, very much in love. As she dwelled upon that fact, her brush caressed the canvas as her eyes caressed the redhead on the stool before her, encased in a ray of light, appearing almost otherworldly like a celestial being.

On his part Kenshin was happier then he could remember ever being in his entire life. His relationship with Tomoe had been filled with moments of joy but the sadness always seemed to be underlying, as her smile was melencholy, having had adult burdens placed upon her slender shoulders since she was barely in her teens. And he would be filled with the deep sense of his own inadequecies, always feeling lacking because of the way Hiko acted toward him, always trying to "make him into a man." Subsequently, their times together were spent commisurating about their difficulties and he found he wanted to protect Tomoe and her happiness, a task that he still felt he had failed miserably.

But now with Kaoru Kenshin felt he was given a chance to be alive again, free like the birds soaring in the warm spring sky after the long cold winter. He woke every morning with a lightness of heart that he had felt for the first time in his life and as he toiled about the dojo, helping out with both teaching and domestic chores, he found himself humming. And he often smiled as he watched her blossom in her own gladness of spirit, gradually recovering from the tragedy of her father's suicide. She also was showing that she had reciprocated his feelings making his heart and senses sing. However, the most important thing was that Kaoru's smile; the genuine smile for which he had always yearned, had become his treasure as like a gift it had been frequently given to him. It was something he needed daily like food and water and something he got from her with no hesitation.

While posing for the portrait Kenshin surrepticiously slid his eyes to gaze at her as she worked and like he did many times during the course of the day imagined that she was locked in his arms. A smile crept upon his features inadvertantly as the thought took hold.

"Mou Kenshin, you changed your expression. I need you serious, not smiling for this," Kaoru groused as she threw her brush down in a typical artist's snit. Her pretty face was annoyed, making him smile even more.

"Gomen, Kaoru," Kenshin said sheepishly scratching the back of his head as he saw the storm clouds gather in her sapphire eyes.

The irate artist stomped around the easel and came right to him as she huffed, "How many times must I tell you that you need to stay still and not move." She grabbed his hand and yanked it back in place, in his lap. But as she did, her hand brushed against a very private part and got an immediate response causing Kenshin to chuckle as he gently trapped her hand at the area and squeezed it affectionately.

Not seeing the humor Kaoru was even more irked and demanded, "What's so funny?"

The redhead continued holding her hand as he replied in a husky purr "Nothing really. It's just you've made me a very happy man, aka-chan."

Kaoru gaped at him in bewilderment until realization dawned and with wide eyes and a rapidly growing blush spreading across her ivory cheeks she snatched her hand away. Unable to hold it back any longer Kenshin threw his head back and let loose a hearty laugh.

"Hentai," she hissed as she aimed a box at his ear that the redhead deftly averted as he jumped off the stool and stood there laughing. Her eyes flashed dangerously as she heard Kenshin thoroughly enjoying himself and soon the hilarity of the situation got to her as her anger fled and her own musical laughter joined his. Both then collasped on the tatami in a fit of mirth.

For several moments the laughter of the couple echoed in the sparse studio and tears ran down their faces as both finally calmed down. Sitting side by side Kenshin took Kaoru's hand and held it in both of his, this time safely away from the danger area.

"Gomen, aka-chan. I didn't mean to be so vulgar but with your sweet hand touching me, the earth moved, that it did," he murmured.

Kaoru shook her head and leaned close to him. "You're incorrigable, Kenshin."

"Iie, just a man," he stated cheerfully. He leaned over to her ear and whispered, "But a man who finds just being with you an intense turn-on."

Kaoru looked at him and found herself pulled into the warm amethyst pools that radiated heat like an evaporating puddle in the hot sun. She felt another blush come on her cheeks as Kenshin took her hand and brought it to his mouth to plant soft, sensual kisses on her palm. However, suddenly nervous she tried to pull away.

"W-we need to get back to work," she stammered but he held fast and Kaoru found that his eyes now were no longer soft lavender but had a golden tint. Her heart began to pound.

Kenshin sensed her flustered state and said softly, almost growling, "Don't be afraid of me, Kaoru. I love you more than life itself and I would never harm you."

"I know," she murmured. "I love you, too."

"Then trust me, koibito." He released her hand and cupped her face in his hands, drawing her to him. Mesmerized by his words and his amazing eyes Kaoru surrendered and allowed his mouth to claim her. . . .

At the same time over in the seediest area of metropolitan Tokyo, a dark limousine with tinted windows sat parked behind an abandoned dilapidated warehouse in the shadow of the late afternoon sun. The car by nature of its clandestine appearance appeared strange in the day, as if waiting for someone and soon it was joined as another vehicle crept into view. A blue Toyota pickup truck rounded the far end of the structure and pulled up to the limo, side-by-side. The drivers side door opened up and Tobei climbed out as the window of the rear of the black vehicle opened.

"I'm here."

The one within the depths of the vehicle closed the window and the door opened, letting him in. Tobei climbed in and took a seat facing the rear and the figure waiting there.

"So glad you fit seeing me into your busy schedule, cousin." A young man in his mid twenties, a Shinpan dressed in black with Rayban sunglasses sat casually in the fine leather seat, with his arms resting on the back.

Tobei took a deep breath to calm his nerves. "Forgive me for putting this off, Wu. I've been…busy."

"Aa, I know. And that's another thing. You're allowing your obsession with this Kamiya girl distract you from your job. May I remind you that you're supposed to be overseeing my dealer network at the university while you are there taking classes. And now with the last piece in place, the smuggling operation from Shanghai, it's your job to make sure the product is distributed to the network."

Tobei lowered his head and nodded, "Hai, I know."

Wu Heishin leaned closer to his cousin and asked, "So what is it about this girl that has you so distracted, Tobei? You never had problems getting laid before."

Tobei scowled as he replied tersely, "It's not that. She almost gave me a concussion and I owe her, big time." He reached up and fingered the scar on his temple that was a reminder of the night Kaoru lowered the boom in the dormatory and his fury roiled inside _that bitch._

Wu sighed and said, "Spare me the details. Just get your head out of your ass and get back to work." He slid the sunglasses down his nose and peered over them with cold obsidian eyes. "Or I'll cut you loose and believe me nobody will know you ever existed."

Tobei shuddered inwardly as he nodded. "Understood."

Satisfied, Wu leaned back and inquired, "Now, what about this kid you told me about?"

Tobei brightened as he stated, "I found him a few weeks ago by the dumpster near one of the dorms. He was starving and just had a dufflebag with some clothes in it so I felt sorry for him and took the kid in. Got no family and his only sister was killed in a car accident a couple of months ago."

Wu chuckled as he said, "Taking in strays now, huh? You must be getting soft."

Tobei snapped, "Hardly. He's earning his way, believe me. He's been doing delivery work for me and the dealers and he's pretty good. Gets the job done fast and no mistakes. Handles the cash pretty good, too."

"Humph! Well, sounds good. What's the kid's name?"

"Yukishiro Enishi."

Wu was thoughtfully silent a moment before he asked another pertinent question. "You sure he's got no relatives that'll have the fuzz on our tails looking for him?"

Tobei smirked as he assured his cousin. "Aa, I'm sure. The kid's real hot, blames his sister's boyfriend for her death and I get the feeling he wants revenge."

"I see." Wu gave a slow, sinister smile. "Sounds like he's a keeper. Bring him with you the next time we meet."

"Will do." Tobei reached to open the door to let himself out but before he could climb out, Wu laid a detaining hand on his arm.

"About the girl. You handle your business as you want but make sure that you keep your nose clean. 'Cause if you don't, it's _your_ problem, I'm not bailing you out."

Tobei nodded and gestured with his hand without turning around, acknowledging the last statement . The door closed and Wu lowered the window to watch as his cousin got into his truck and drive away, then settled back with a smirk as he thought about the way his organization thrived at the university, especially during the weekends when he did a booming business. It was a delicious bit of irony that his cousin Tobei being enrolled as a pre-law student would be the overseer in his drug business and applied his talents to making it such a success. But if this obsession Tobei had with the girl got any worse, the business would suffer and as such a liability, Tobei would then no longer be useful and would be disposed of accordingly.

Wu Heishin, the CEO of the most active drug smuggling organization in eastern Asia pressed the button that rolled up the window and tapped the partition separating him from his driver to let him know that he was ready to leave. Immediately the car started and slowly pulled away.

…………………………………………………………………………

The date of the kendo championship tournament was drawing close as was the deadline for submitting the finished portrait project. Omura-sensei had wanted the portraits in so he could grade them before the big exhibition that would show the best of the semester classwork from the entire art department. This year the owner of a prestigeous art gallery from Shinjuku was to be the judge and was offering the winners in the different categories private showings in his gallery so all the students were making sure that their work that was selected for the show was perfectly displayed. The prize of the offer of a showing could be the beginning of a career in the arts and such, highly coveted by everyone, Kaoru included. For even in spite of her having to drop out to run the Kamiya Dojo, she still had aspirations to be a professional artist. And the kendo championship was to be the weekend before the deadline making certain that she would be very busy as she was also occupied with practicing her kata.

However, on this day she was applying a varnish to the finished work, which gave the painting a luminescent glow that added to the depth of the painting. Kaoru, clad in some torn jeans and an old haori that acted as a smock was stroking the odiferous fluid on the canvas, wisely with the shoji and window slats open to let out the fumes. Taking a few steps back to admire her handiwork, Kaoru stared at the narrow canvas with a critical eye.

The portrait itself was a montage of several different poses and views of her friend Himura Kenshin, showcasing his emotions and and in the different views like a kalaidescope and under her expert hand, the change of emotion was subtle yet present. The varnish was bringing out the arresting characteristics of the painting, which were the many views of Kenshin's eyes. The windows of his soul were truly that as in the different views one could see either the brightest light or darkest shadow. This made the piece poignant and haunting however, being the consummate perfectionist she was and as she always did, she could see where she could have done more.

Kaoru was still studying the picture with a frown when Kenshin slipped in and stole behind her leaning against her so he could murmur in her ear.

"It looks great, aka-chan. Good job."

Without turning Kaoru responded in a dubious manner, "It's okay. But I had a hard time with the two on the right." She pointed to two head views of him, one brightly smiling and raised up as if to the sun, and the other pensive and in shadow with eyes downcast. The perfect opposites.

Kenshin stepped over to the easel and studied the canvas, unnerved by the many facets of him she had captured and then his eyes were drawn and riveted to the bottom left view, one that caused his heart to constrict as he knew it was not derived from a photo or sketch for which he had posed. . . .

It was a view of him in his dark side, his face impassive and his eyes narrowed and amber making him look almost demonic. It chilled him because it showed very clearly that Kaoru had been deeply affected by what happened that night he had lost control. Guilt filled Kenshin as he stepped back scowling.

Kaoru watched as his face went through the transformation from tender geniality to guarded near hostility, his anger showing in the slight gold tint in his eyes. She quashed her own rising dread as she wondered why he was mad. As if to shield herself, Kaoru clutched her arms and stood a distance from him.

Hesitently, she addressed him, "Kenshin?"

His eyes never leaving the canvas he replied, "Aa?"

"A-are you okay?"

He turned and stared at her, worry and fear apparent in her and like a bucket of water on the starting of a fire, the look in those indigo orbs doused the fury that was bubbling to the surface. Kenshin shook his head and then gave her a sweet smile as he came to her, placing his hands on her shoulders.

"I'm fine, Kaoru." He leaned in and planted a kiss on her forehead then released her and asked, "So when's it due at school?"

She walked over to the drafting table where the varnish was in a jar and capped it as she replied, "Next Monday's the due date. Then if it's picked, the art exhibition and competition is the following Thursday."

"So it's right after the tournament this weekend? You've got quite a full plate."

"Uh-huh." Kaoru took the brushes she used to varnish the painting and dipped them in a can of solvent to clean them and then wiped them dry with some rags. She then did some other tidying up as Kenshin watched.

The phone extention then rang so Kaoru went over to answer it. "Hello? ….Hello? ….Hello!" A chill of disquiet went down her spine as another of "those calls" took place and she glanced at Kenshin who strode over and grabbed the receiver.

"Who the hell is this?" he demanded as a sharp click indicated the caller had hung up. He uttered an oath as he said in annoyance, "This has got to stop, this person is calling and hanging up all the time now."

Kaoru inwardly shuddered as she said to herself _at least this time he just hung up without saying anything._ Other calls had included threats against the dojo, her life, and promises to violate her in the most graphic terms, sending icy chills in her. But wanting to keep the dark beast of Kenshin's fury at bay and the situation low key she sighed as she agreed, "I know but other than changing the number here what can I do? Changing the number costs money I can't afford, and besides it would still be listed in book because of the dojo."

Kenshin fought the rising concern as he said, "You should at least report it to the phone company, Kaoru. This falls under harassment and you do live here alone. It's happening too much for my liking."

But she just shrugged it off as she went over and picked up the easel. "No need to make a big deal out of it. Probably just kids playing pranks." She made her way past him, ending the conversation much to his consternation but he honored her desire and said no more.

"So," he said as she moved the easel with the painting closer to the window to aid in the drying. "Are you finished?"

"Just about," Kaoru replied as she finished setting the easel up. She stepped back to look at her work again then asked,"Why? You have something in mind to do?"

"Uh-huh," Kenshin replied. "We need to practice for the tournament and since it's such a nice day I thought we could practice down by the river. There's a great breeze there and after being cooped up here all morning with these fumes I'm surprised you're not stoned."

Kaoru giggled giddily as she went to him and said in a singsong voice, "Are you sure? I really do have quite a buzz on."

Kenshin's eyes danced as he said pseudo-sternly, "That settles it, you need some fresh air now, Kaoru-dono."

She pouted and retorted, "Killjoy." She then flounced over to the shoji and said primly, "Okay. I'll go get changed and we'll go to the river." Letting herself out, she headed to her bedroom.

Shaking his head and chuckling Kenshin grinned affectionately at his love as he watched her go. . . .

About a half hour later clad in workout hakama and gi the two went to the riverbank and standing on a small bluff both brandishing bokken as they sparred, they practiced kikare-geiko and ji-geiko to sharpen their readiness and practice attack moves learned from the team and their own styles. And since Kaoru and Kenshin were both running the classes at the Kamiya dojo, they instituted techniques from Kamiya-Kasshin Ryu into the practice.

As he sparred Kenshin kept a firm rein on his dark emotions in the heat of battle by focusing on Kaoru's face and filling his mind with soft, tender thoughts of her. His love for the raven tressed beauty kept him grounded as he parryed her attacks.

On her side, Kaoru kept her own movements as nonaggresive as possible, reluctant to unleash the beast she saw during the practice in the dojo. But as she participated the the ji-geiko, she noticed Kenshin's restraint and it calmed her as she began again to fully trust him.

Meanwhile about twenty-five hundred meters to the west from the elevated highway overpass, Tobei's blue pickup pulled onto the breakdown lane and near the wire fence that barricaded the thoroughfare. He parked the vehicle and turned off the motor, then slid over to the passenger seat. Peering through a set of binoculars out the open window, he scanned the riverbank in the distance and then spotting his quarry, grinned. He then reached in back for an automatic rifle, complete with silencer and scope. It was time to remove a very persistent barrier to his goal of revenge.

"Fish in a barrel," he commented in satisfaction as he squeezed off a few rounds. . .

Over on the riverbank, Kenshin and Kaoru were engaged in some intense kikare-geiko, both brandishing bokken in rapid attacks and parries when both bokken met in a draw. Both acknowledged the move, bowed and smiled at each other.

Kaoru remarked breathlessly, "That was quite a match. Your skill is amazing, Kenshin."

He grinned as he replied, catching his breath, "So's yours. But I need a break."

"Aa, me too." She took a deep breath of the sweet spring zephyr, jabbing the bokken into the dirt, then reaching with her arms up to stretch and embrace the air. Her effervescence drew a chuckle out of her partner as he came closer.

With an affectionate smile on his even features, Kenshin gazed at his beloved as he came to her and then his ki sent him a chill of impending danger. With lightning quickness he leapt toward her and knocked her to the grass, covering her with his body.

"Get down!" he barked as he heard a series of pops and felt something whizz past them.

Frightened, Kaoru asked, "What's happening?" Her hands were on his shoulders and she tried to look over him to see for herself but he kept her pinned to the ground.

"Never mind just stay down."

Kenshin's face was twisted into a scowl as he scanned the direction from which the alleged shots came and saw nothing but a small group of teenaged boys that were gathered, one holding what appeared to be a pistol. With a violent curse, he jumped up and bit out over his shoulder, "Don't move an inch till I get back."

"B-but Kenshin, why?"

"Just stay put, Kaoru!" His fierce tone brooked no disobedience and she meekly complied as he took offat a dead sprint to where the boys were grouped. . .

At the overpass, Tobei chuckled as through the rifle scope he watched Kenshin push Kaoru down and then look around to see where the shots were coming _fool, you may be a kendo champion but a bullet will go through you as easy as it will through anyone._ He watched as the kendoist made his way to the group of teens and began to focus in for another shot. . .

Meanwhile Kenshin got to the group and with narrowed amber-tinted eyes demanded of them. "Are you guys shooting at my girlfriend and me?"

"Huh?" one boy said dumbly.

Kenshin snapped as he gestured to the pistol, a BB gun that one boy was holding in his hand, "Have you been taking pot shots at my girl and me?"

"Man, you gotta be kidding," the tallest boy, apparently the leader retorted.

Kenshin got into the kid's face, his expression deadly and his eyes now completely amber. "Do I look like I'm kidding?"

All the youths saw the grim promise in the cold amber orbs and they immediately shook their heads in fear. "Iie, iie!"

"Well, do I get some answers or what?"

One boy answered nervously "We were just practicing shooting the BB gun, is all."

"Aa, we didn't even know you and your girlfriend were down there." The tall, thin leader of the group was wary but still defiant as he defended his comrades.

Kenshin whirled and skewered the leader with a hard glare then asked, "Well? What about you then? You got something different to say?"

The boy's bravado evaporated as he stared at the burning pools and he stammered,"I-ie, sir. I'm just saying w-we were shooting the gun toward down river, not at you guys by the river. W-we didn't even know you and your girl was down there." He added for good measure, "Honest."

Another boy came closer to Kenshin and stared at him in recognition. "Hey, I know you. You're Himura Kenshin, the university kendo champ. I saw your last match you were unbelievable!"

The rest of the boys crowded around as Kenshin's demeanor faded to one of modesty as he reluctantly accepted the praise and adoration that he usually received because of his kendo accomplishments. Now convinced that the boys were telling the truth he was trying to beg out gracefully to get back to Kaoru when his ki again screamed at him and another pop sounded.

"Duck everybody!" Kenshin ordered as the group all hit the ground except for the leader, who remained standing and then fell forward in slow motion, a crimson explosion on his right shoulder as blood splattered.

"Kuso!" Kenshin swore as he crawled over to the fallen boy and reaching down his leg, tore a strip from his hakama to put on the youth's shoulder try to stem the bleeding. His buddies all scrambled over to see, their faces showing shock and fear.

"What happened, Himura-san? Is Kansuke all right?" One of the boys asked with wide eyes as the rest watched their leader, horrified by what happened.

Without looking up Kenshin directed, "Somebody go over to the soba stand across the street and get an ambulance. And one of you keep this pressure on the wound till the ambulance comes."

"Hai."

Two of the boys jumped up and did as he said as another took over the care of their friend. Now free, Kenshin rose and studied perimeter of the river bank, looking over to the line of stores across the street and the highway overpass _Shimatta, where the hell did the shots come from? And who's shooting over here?_

At the pickup, Tobei saw with dismay that his shot missed Kenshin and hit some kid so he tossed the rifle in back and got behind the wheel again. Figuring that he should make himself scarce, he fired up the engine and peeled off into the fast flowing traffic. . . .

Down at the riverbank and still flat on the grass, Kaoru heard the wail of an ambulance and startled, she jumped up and turned to where Kenshin and a group of boys all were gathered around someone lying on the ground. Her heart sinking in dread, she climbed up the grassy incline to see what had happened. She got there just as the EMTs were preparing a boy to take to the hospital and came to Kenshin's side.

"What happened to him, Kenshin?"

Frowning as he watched the EMTs lift Kansuke onto the gurney he replied flatly, "Someone shot the kid while I was talking to them to try to find out if they were the ones shooting at us."

Kaoru's eyes became wide sapphire pools. "Shooting at us? Someone was shooting at us?"

He nodded, "Aa. That's why I pushed you down. I had a bad feeling in my ki and felt something flying by. I saw that those kids were shooting a BB gun so I thought it was them. Then one of them got shot."

"Kuso," she breathed, incredulous as she saw the EMTs carry the boy to the waiting ambulance.

"Aa."

Kenshin then took her by the arm to leave but two uniformed police came toward them, one being none other than Saito. The surly captain of the university kendo team was actually a rookie police officer who was majoring in criminal science and aspired to be a detective. He followed his partner, a young man named Okura who was barely older than him. Both stopped before the couple.

Saito smirked as he lit a cigarette. "Well. Well. Who'd figure you two would be at the scene of a crime. Taking a romantic stroll by the river, perhaps?"

Kenshin's eyes narrowed as he snapped, "That's none of your business, ookami."

Saito's partner asked him, "You know these people?"

The wolflike man nodded as he took a drag from his smoke. "Aa. Himura and Kamiya are on my kendo team at the university." He squinted through the blue haze at the redhead as Kenshin met the subtle challenge.

"I see." Okura noticed the animosity between the two so he cleared his throat and stated formally, "If you don't mind, we'd like ask you and your girlfriend some questions about what happened here. Saito, take notes."

"Hai." Saito tossed his cigarette and fished out a notebook and pen. He gestured with a slight nod to Kenshin. "Go ahead."

"What do you want to know?"

Okura inquired, "What was going on before the shooting?"

Kenshin replied, "Kaoru and I were at the riverbank practicing for the kendo tournament."

"Where?"

He gestured to the small bluff near the water's edge. "Over there. We were there to catch the breeze from the river while we practiced. Then I heard a popping noise so I pushed Kaoru down and felt something whizz by us."

Okura nodded and then asked, "So how did you figure it was someone shooting at you?"

"The popping noise sounded like shots and I had a bad feeling. Better safe than sorry."

Okura exchanged a glance with Saito, who nodded and continued writing. He then looked directly at Kenshin and asked, "And do you know of anyone that would want to take a shot at you?"

Saito smirked and remarked, "Lots, on the kendo circuit." He nodded at the couple and made a comment. "Himura's the hot child on the kendo team at school."

Kenshin shot him a dirty look and replied, "Nobody I can think of."

Kaoru, quiet until then, finally spoke, "Well, officer, uhh, I have been getting some strange phone calls."

Okura turned to her. "Strange phone calls?"

She nodded, "Aa. Someone's been calling me, at different times of the day, listening and hanging up."

"Is that all?"

Kaoru shot a guilty look at Kenshin and shook her head. "Iie. A few times, the caller has threatened me."

At those words Kenshin whirled and pinned her with his eyes as he exploded, "Say _what?_"

Okura probed, "What did they say to you?"

Kaoru tried to ignore the anger in her friend's handsome face as she answered hesitantly, "They say that I should watch out, I'm going to end up with my father." She lowered her head and stated softly, "He's dead."

Okura murmured, 'I'm sorry." He then asked, "Is the caller someone you know, the voice someone you recognize?"

Kaoru frowned thoughfully as she tried to remember the voice and then hiding her alarm when she realized she did shook her ebony ponytail. "Iie, it sounds muffled but it's definitely a man." She cast another worried glance at Kenshin but he was silent and scowling, not even looking at her.

Okura glanced at Saito again and then asked, "Have you anybody with a grudge against you, Kamiya-san?"

Feeling trapped she tittered as she stated, "Of course not!"

"Huh?" Kenshin eyed her incredulous as she glanced at him, then turned away from his questioning eyes.

Okura saw the exchange and seeing something underlying he inquired, "You sure?"

Kaoru bit her lip as she hesitated, weighing whether or not she should say anything. She then shook her head and said with a nervous giggle. "Iie, officer no one."

The reaction to her baldfaced lie from the two other men was instant. Saito raised an eyebrow as he stared right at her but Kenshin's visage was like a sky before a storm and she made an involuntary shiver as she saw amber flashes in his icy blue eyes. But he remained without a word to say and she was grateful.

Okura sensed the tension but shrugged and said, "If you're sure." He gestured to Saito and added, "Okay, well that's all we need for now. If we need anything else, we'll give you a call." He gestured to Saito and said, "Let's go."

"Aa." Saito nodded as he made to follow but gave a parting comment. "It's your choice, Kamiya-san," he said with a significant look indicating that he would say nothing about the incident with Tobei at her father's memorial. He then sauntered off, leaving Kenshin and Kaoru there watching.

Kaoru then felt her arm grasped as Kenshin said brusquely, "I'll take you back to the dojo."

"Okay." She obeyed him without a word.

They headed back to the riverbank to retrieve the bokken and then began the trek back to the dojo. Kaoru knew with a sinking in her heart that Kenshin was upset but she attempted to reach him, nevertheless.

"Kenshin?"

No answer.

She tried again. "Kenshin? Are you all right?"

He grunted and Kaoru became annoyed by his reticence. "Well, are you going to tell me what's wrong?"

He stopped under some trees and not looking at her said coldly, "I'm thinking that maybe it might be a good idea if when we get back I pick up my gear and split, go back to my place where I belong and put some space between us."

"W-why?"

He replied, "Because it's time."

Her heart plummeted further as she asked, "W-what are you talking about?" She gasped as like a flash he turned around and pinned her against a tree trunk, his arms trapping her.

"You know damn well what I mean," Kenshin bit out.

"I-I don't."

"Because it's obvious you don't trust me."

She sputtered in protest, "That's ridiculous. Of course I trust you."

"Right." He gave a short laugh and asked, "Why didn't you tell me that bastard calling you has been threatening you? It's Tobei isn't it? How many times has he called with threats, Kaoru?"

"N-not many," she stammered.

"Is that the truth?" he asked quietly.

Now she was angry as she snapped, "I'm not lying."

"Really?" He sighed as he asked, "Then why did you lie to that cop? And Saito knew you were lying. Did you forget what happened at your father's memorial?" His eyes were penetrating, like a laser ray.

Kaoru met his eyes with her own stormy glare. "Of course not!"

"Then why not come clean, aka-chan? Tell those of us that want to help or at the very least tell me that you've been getting threats. Why won't you do that?"

Kaoru saw the hurt deep within the violet orbs that were waiting for her to explain why she was not telling him, why she was insisting on carrying the burden of fear when he was there to help shoulder the load. But all she could think of was how the dark side in Kenshin was ready to emerge at the first opportunity and she feared that more than any threat she was getting from anyone else. The idea that he could lose himself in the darkness because of something happening to her was an unthinkable prospect that she intended to avoid at all costs. And besides, the fear she still felt because of her ordeal was still something that had her captive and she loathed it.

She pushed herself from Kenshin and said in a wavering voice, "I-I can't. I can't let myself think about what happened and….I-I can't let you get involved and into trouble because of it." Her back facing him, she clutched her arms in a huddle.

Kenshin came to her and said gently, "It's my choice to get involved, especially when some son of a bitch is threatening you. Or did you forget that I love you?"

Kaoru shook her head.

At her response Kenshin got in front of her and cupped her face in his hands as he said, "Then trust me, tenshi. Now tell me, the guy calling and threatening you is Tobei, isn't it?"

She looked into those fathomless orbs of his and nodded, biting her lip as the tears broke forth and she sobbed uncontrollably, wrapping her arms around him.

He returned the embrace and whispered, "What else did he say to you besides what you told the cop?"

Kaoru sniffled and whispered the all the threats to her, her life and even the vile suggestions of how he was going to finish what he started, the words sickening to them both.

When she finished Kenshin felt the rage rise in him but kept his cool as he crushed her to him and murmured, "Believe me, he will NEVER get near you, Kaoru. And that's a promise."

They remained locked in each other's arms as the late afternoon sun caused their shadows to lengthen on the sidewalk, then after that they broke apart and continued their way to the dojo.

**NEXT…..SHADOWING…..RAIN OF BLOOD**


	13. Chapter 13 SHADOWING RAIN OF BLOOD

_Author's note: Here's a long, action filled chapter that will be the catalyst for the rest of the plot. And it's long so everyone can be satisfied until the next update because as my profile states, I will be busy getting a manuscript finished for a publisher for my original. But I'm aware that the end will leave you wanting more so I'll be working on the update as I write my manuscript. And as usual, a humble thanks for all the readers, reviewers, and those making it and me a favorite. Enjoy!_

_**Glossary of Japanese and Kendo Terms (courtesy of Glossary of Kendo)**_

_**Omedeto---Congratulations**_

_**Tsuki---strike to the throat.**_

**_Zan-shin--- the follow through of a strike, a state of energy, execution, and alertness against an opponent._**

_**Aiuchi---when two opponents reach datotsu simultaneously**_

_**Chusen - a winner selected by lot among the judge(s) or referees.**_

_**Encho - an overtime or extension round in a match. Used to determine a winner when no points are scored during the normal match time period.**_

_**Go-No-Waza (Datotsu) - a parry to a valid datotsu made from Tsuba-zeri-ai.**_

_**Senshu Gakari - court announcer.**_

_**Shinpancho - the chief judge overseeing all court actions.**_

_**Shinpan Shunin - the chief court judge who assists the chief judge during a match.**_

_**Shinpan-in - the team of referees in a court. The team consists of the Shu-shin (the chief referee) and two Fuku-shin (subreferees).**_

_**Ji-Geiko: sparring practice where the kendoist has a chance to try all that he or she has learned with a resisting partner. **_

_**Shiai-Geiko: competition matches which are judged on the basis of a person scoring valid cuts against an opponent. **_

**SHADOWING…..RAIN OF BLOOD**

The morning of the big kendo tournament dawned dark and threatening, with an angry red glow in the eastern sky portending a stormy day ahead. And already in the western sky there were forks of lightning crossing cloud to cloud with distant echos of thunder shattering the silence of the still slumbering city.

Unable to sleep, Kaoru had risen early and still clad in her night clothes, an oversized T-shirt and a light yukata she stepped out on the porch facing the courtyard to observe the daybreak. The red glow had dissapated into a uniform gray overcast, with occasional flashes of lightning. She frowned in concern as she ascertained the ominous weather reflected the feelings of unease that the incident two days ago at the river had left. She shivered as a brisk gust of wind coincided with her thought of being somebody's target.

_Mou, somebody tried to kill me then Kenshin. But who? And why? Surely Tobei wouldn't be so crazy to do that. Or would he?_ Kaoru pondered as she stood watching the scudding clouds, her mind running a mile a minute.

She was so deep in her brooding that she was startled by two arms snaking around her waist and a raspy tenor murmuring in her ear.

"Ohayo, aka-chan." Kenshin's gentle but strong presence enveloped her, setting her mind at ease instantly. He asked, "Why are you up so early?"

Kaoru turned and faced him. "I couldn't sleep."

"Excited about the tournament?"

"I guess," Kaoru sighed but her manner indicated that there was more so Kenshin waited for her to go on. "But mostly I've been trying to figure out who'd want to shoot at us." She studied him as she added, "Aren't you?"

Kenshin frowned and nodded. "Yeah, I've been trying to figure it out since Thursday but so far I'm coming up empty." He gave her a meaningful look as he added, "At least on my side."

Kaoru met his steady gaze and said defensively, "I-I can't think of anyone on my side, either."

"Is that so?"

"Uh-huh."

Sapphire met amethyst as the two stood at a stalemate for a pregnant moment that seemed to go on indefinitely. Finally it was broken as Kenshin sighed and surrendered to his beloved's stubborness.

"If you say so," he acquiesced. But his eyes hardened to glacial blue as he gave a warning. "But if you're not telling me the truth Kaoru, be aware that I will find out eventually and act as I see fit."

Kaoru saw a bit of amber swirl in his orbs and shivered again as distant thunder rolled in the background. . . .

A couple of hours later, Kenshin and Kaoru were in her Celica and driving to the auditorium at the university where the tournament would be held. Kenshin was driving but conversation between the two was non-existent as they mentally got ready for the event. Also, the shooting incident at the river two days ago had been constantly on the minds of the inhabitents of the Kamiya Dojo and acted as an invisible barrier between them as Kaoru again buried her feelings behind her wall. This subsequently caused a feeling of hurt in Kenshin that made him act a bit cooler toward Kaoru than he had been acting before everything happened. Because of that. he had seriously considered moving out as he had said but his fear for her safety kept him nearby, just in case the psycho tried again but sensing her standoffish manner, he kept his distance as well. However, in light of the deep affection he had for her, keeping his distance felt unnatural and damned uncomfortable and he hated both it and the circumstances causing the situation.

The traffic light turned red in the sheet of rain and Kenshin stopped the car, scowling at the dark sky as his mind went back to the incident and who could be nuts enough to shoot at him and Kaoru. Since the ordeal he had his suspicions running rampant as to who the person was and the mere thought brought the dark fury within to the surface. But he kept the beast chained as not to futher upset Kaoru and released his pent up emotion yesterday by going to a secluded wooded area by the river to let loose, totalling several bushes and two trees.

After blowing off steam and feeling guilty, Kenshin had also went to visit the injured boy Kansuke at his home as he had been released from the hospital after treatment. The boy's parents were effusively grateful to him for saving their son's life which did not make him feel any better. Visiting Kansuke, Kenshin had discovered that the youth held no ill will toward him either, which added to his own mixed emotions and made him feel worse. On top of that, the Tokyo police had no clues as they had done an investigation and found nothing in the general vicinity around the river that led to any proof of a sniper in the area so far. But the police had assured him that the investigation was not over.

Kenshin stared ahead and wracked his brain to deduce who the culprit could be _Kuso, could it be that bastard Tobei tried to kill Kaoru first then tried to get me? But what would be the gain in killing us? Is he that bent on revenge for when she cracked him? And if it was him where exactly was he when he was using us for target practice? Has he been watching the dojo all this time and just waiting to strike?_

The green light shimmered in the deluge as Kenshin remained in a suspended state and Kaoru shook him from his reverie, "Kenshin, the light's green."

"Huh?"

An impatient toot from the traffic behind them acted as a reminder so Kenshin shook his titian head and muttered an apology before he stepped on the accelerator and the Celica shot forward. . .

…………………………………………………………………………………..

The Kogoro Katsura Memorial Auditorium was centrally located in the heart of the university campus, and because of its size and capacity, was a popular venue for more than university sporting events. Several entertainment events presented there were concerts, fairs, and the annual tour of the circus, but today the venue would hold the Japan National Kendo Championship Tournament and kendoists from universities and dojos throughout the archipelago were coming to compete for the title of National Champion. So the parking lots surrounding the huge building were filling with competitors and spectators alike.

Having parked the Celica in the lot closest to the team locker room, Kenshin and Kaoru both made their way to the rear entrance, carrying their boku and bokken, along with sakabatou with blunted edges for exhibitions taking place after the final awards were to be distributed. They trudged single-file through the lightly pattering drops and were nearly to the door when Kaoru's friend Tae and her boyfriend Okitsugu approached the couple.

"Kaoru-chan! Kaoru-chan, wait!"

Kaoru turned around and saw her old friend rushing up to her and she frowned in consternation, drawing Kenshin's immediate attention. He came beside her and made an inquiry.

"What's wrong, Kaoru-tenshi? And who's that?"

Kaoru replied cryptically, "My friend Tae and her boyfriend."

Kenshin asked, "Aren't they the ones who introduced you to Tobei?"

"Yeah."

At that bit of news Kenshin became thoroughly irked. "Well, what the hell do they want, we gotta get inside for practice before the tournament."

Kaoru was unnerved by the situation and snapped, "How should I know? I haven't heard from Tae since---." She was cut off by Tae's breathless summons.

"Kaoru, I heard you're on the kendo team so I just thought---," Tae huffed but Kaoru waved her hand impatiently.

"Look Tae, I don't have time right now to talk so if you'll excuse me---," but her friend grasped her arm firmly.

"Kaoru-chan, we just heard about what happened Thursday," Tae said with concern in her onyx eyes. "Gomen."

Kaoru and Kenshin both regarded the other couple with a somewhat guarded manner, Kaoru remembering that Tobei was Okitsugu's friend and so there was an air of awkwardness between them. She sighed and answered coolly, "Arigatou, Tae. But why are you apologizing?"

Tae bit her lip and pressed on. "Okitsugu and I have wanted to talk to you about….what happened last semester. We've wanted to talk to you for a long time but---,"

"You were afraid," Kaoru said softly, matter of factly. "Because you felt guilty."

"Aa," Tae said and Okitsugu nodded.

"Forgive me, Kaoru-san. I had no idea Tobei would be so…," he began but Kenshin broke his silence by snorting in derision.

"Wacko? Persistent?" His icy blue orbs had flashes of amber in them.

Kaoru said, "Forgive me for being rude. This is my friend, Himura Kenshin." She conducted the introduction. "Kenshin, this is my old friend Tae and her boyfriend, Okitsugu."

Both bowed to Kenshin and he gave a slight bow back. But his anger was piqued out of his strong sense of protectiveness toward Kaoru and he was not overly friendly.

"So," he began, "You're the ones that introduced that baka to Kaoru. Are you aware of what he did and is continuing to do to her? That he actually came to her father's memorial and threatened her?"

Tae opened her mouth to reply but Okitsugu laid a hand on her arm and answered, "We're very sorry about the trouble he's caused. We had no idea he'd be like this."

Kaoru tried to answer but Kenshin cut her off, "No idea? He's supposed to be your friend, for Kami sake and you didn't know he was a psychopath? Unbelievable."

Tae's boyfriend frowned and bristled, "He's always been a good friend. But he really fell for Kaoru big time and when she didn't feel the same….he snapped."

"Snapped?" Kaoru was incredulous. "That's an understatement, he tried to rape me!"

Kenshin glared at him and added cuttingly, "And this is because your buddy can't take no for an answer. He's a sick son of a bitch and he even tried to hurt her while she was mourning her father's death!"

Okitsugu met the angry eyes of the redhead with a scowl of his own but his girlfriend was filled with shame. "G-gomen for that too, Kaoru-chan," Tae said with her head lowered. "I mean about your father."

"You didn't even come to see me when he died, Tae. That really hurt since we had been friends since primary school." Kaoru pointed out with her voice low.

"I-I know. I just didn't know how to face you after what happened with Tobei at my dorm, I-I had no idea he would attack you." There was no guile in her, just honest remorse.

She approached Kaoru tentatively and Kaoru responded by putting down her gear and opening her arms for an embrace, forgiveness for her friend in her indigo eyes. Tae accepted the gesture and with tears in both their eyes, the young women hugged.

"You're forgiven Tae," Kaoru sniffled. "I've missed you so."

"Same here," Tae sobbed. "I picked up the phone to call you hundreds of times, but each time I lost my nerve. I'm so ashamed that what happened to you was my fault."

The men stood and watched as bridges between their girlfriends were mended and as males usually do became embarrassed by the mysteries of the female sex that had put them at odds. Now, with the main reason of their own animosity gone, Kenshin and Okitsugu exchanged glances and words of reconciliation.

"Looks like all's well again," Okitsugu pointed out.

"Yeah," Kenshin agreed as he gazed at Kaoru and then turned to Okitsugu, offering his hand. "Sorry about my attitude before, name's Himura Kenshin."

"No problem, man. Yoshida Okitsugu." The boys shook hands in acknowledgement as Okitsugu added, "I know all about you, you're incredible in kendo matches."

Kenshin grinned as he nodded, "Arigatou, but I'm just part of a great team. Which reminds me--," he called over to Kaoru, "Aka-chan, we gotta get going or we'll miss the pre-match sessions." He then leaned down and gathered both his and Kaoru's bogu to head in.

"Hai, Kenshin."

Over where the girls were Kaoru pulled away from Tae's embrace as her friend gave her a knowing glint. "Aka-chan, huh? Sounds pretty intense, Kaoru-chan. Everybody knows about Himura-san, you've got quite a catch."

Kaoru tried to hide a slight blush and sighed as she denied weakly, "Tae, it's not like that, really. Kenshin's just a good friend."

"Good friend, huh?" Tae insinuated with a smile. "The best swordsman on the kendo team, a DJ on the campus radio station, and one of the hottest guys in school, is calling you 'aka-chan' and is very protective of you. That sounds like a bit more than just a good friend to me."

Kaoru tried to be blasé and shrugged as she responded, "He's just very sweet, Tae. He's been so supportive of me since my father died, and a really good friend." She turned and said loudly, "I'm coming!" She hurried over to where Kenshin and Okitsugu were standing.

"Sorry, we got a bit carried away." She glanced about for her gear and saw Kenshin had picked it up and was carrying it in one arm with his own. He flashed a fond smile at her.

"It's okay, aka-chan. I have your bogu here." Kenshn reached for Kaoru's hand and taking it said, "We gotta get inside."

"Okay." She turned to Tae, now beside Okitsugu. "See you guys later?"

Tae smiled as a flash of lightning cracked and she said, "You bet!" Okitsugu took her hand to run to the front of the auditorium in the now pouring rain and she cried over her shoulder, "Good luck!"

"Arigatou!" Kaoru sang out as Kenshin pulled her out of the rain behind the locker room door.

Unknown to the foursome over in a parking spot three rows from the building, Tobei watched the exchange from his blue pickup. The entire time his onyx eyes trained only on the petite figure with a midnight ponytail and clad in kendo garb. He licked his lips in anticipation as he began to plan his next move. . . .

A half hour later, after some last minute ji-geiko the team went to prepare for the upcoming matches and since Kaoru was the lone woman on the team, she had the ladies locker room all to herself. There she changed from practice hakama and gi to a more formal gear that reflected the team logo and the university colors, cobalt blue and black. As she dressed she was filled with the usual buitterflies she always experienced before a match. But this time what had transpired in the parking lot was weighing heavy on her mind as she was brushing her hair in the shower room when there was a knock on the door that startled her from her thoughts.

"Come in," Kaoru called out as she continued brushing the inky shock of hair to a glossy sheen.

The door opened and Kenshin came in, looking around for her. "Kaoru? Are you here?" He patrolled the rows of lockers. "Kaoru?"

"I'm right here," she called as she gave her hair a final stroke.

He joined her and slipped his arm about her waist. "Hey are you okay? You didn't say much before practice and then disappeared right after."

Kaoru replied matter-of-factly, "I came back here to get dressed for the tournament and for some quiet to prepare."

She lowered her arm with the brush and her head as she tried to forget what had happened with Tae and mentally prepared herself for the matches but ever perceptive when it came to her, Kenshin saw through the façade. He leaned in and murmured in her ear.

"Aka-chan, don't hide it from me. I know you're uptight about what happened in the parking lot with Tae and I want you to know you can turn to me and talk if you need to." His lips then grazed her lobe and sent shivers down her spine then he turned her around to face him. Cupping her face in his hands he then captured her mouth with his for a soft kiss.

Forgetting everything Kaoru moaned softly and responded with urgency, her mouth receiving him eagerly as her arms wrapped around him and she pressed closer. Kenshin moaned himself as his mind momentarily fogged and he closed off from all other thoughts while he savored the feel of her. But then it became clear as he remembered the tournament and reluctantly pulled away from her.

"We'd better get into the other locker room for the pre match pep talk by Baisotei-sensei," Kaoru pointed out, breathless.

"Yeah." Kenshin agreed.

She hurried out to the locker room with him in tow and began to don her gear, the kote and men and then grabbed her bokken and sakabatou for the matches as Kenshin watched her with a warm smile. She finished and glanced at him to ask, "How do I look?"

He replied, eyes glowing, "You're the cutest kendoist I've ever seen."

Kaoru blushed at his rapt regard as she rejoined, "You're not so bad yourself." Coquettishly, she reached for his hair, tied up on his head. "The topknot suits you, you look like an actual samurai."

Kenshin reached up and fingered the sunset colored fall and gave a bashful shrug. "I guess. Baisotei-sensei told all us guys with hair below our necks that we had to either tie it up or get a haircut. I like my hair long, so I tied it up."

"Yeah, but you usually tie it back anyway," Kaoru pointed out.

"I know but it's usually low on my neck. Anyway, we'd better make tracks, aka-chan, the tournament starts in twenty minutes." He gazed at her and asked, "You sure you're okay?"

Kaoru took a deep breath to calm any other leftover jitters and answered with a smile, "I'm fine, anata. Let's go get 'em."

Pleased, Kenshin grinned at the intimate term she used and leaned in to give her a last kiss. He then took her arm and said, "Lead the way…"

It was soon time for the tournament to begin and it was kicked off with all the pomp and circumstance that a national championship demanded. The president of the university, the Dean of Students, the mayor of Tokyo, and even the Prime Minister were there to preside over the opening ceremony. He came with well wishes from the Emperor and with a special gift for the top kendoist, a genuine katana from the Bakumatsu, a rare treasure. Then after the singing of the national anthem, the preliminary one-on-one matches began with the members of the university team advancing with little effort.

The first win and advance to the finals from the university team was Myojin Yahiko, who easily defeated a fighter twice his size named Kujiranami, using his agility to increase his speed in striking with tsukis and his zan-shin was at its peak. He was declared winner in less than three minutes. Then Kenshin and Kaoru both won decisive matches to advance as well.

The next few matches were also handily won by the university team, with Saito and Aoshi both handing their opponents crushing defeats. From her seat in the stands behind the team bench Misao screamed her approval for her beloved, her enthusiasum contageous as other fans added their own cheers. Several more matches took place, elininating competitors from the ranks as final opponents were paired off for the finals

The next match was Kaoru's final and since she was one of three females in the tournament, her opponent was another of the women who had advanced; a rather solid looking girl about two inches taller than Kaoru named Kamatari who appeared formidable as she got into her chuden-no-kamae to begin.

"Hajime!" the senshu-gakare called and the two women began their match, both showing energy and skill as the crowd roared.

Kaoru was using some moves from the Kamiya-Kasshin Ryu in the shiai-geiko, putting Kamatari on the defensive, but the robust girl had counter moves to each attack, effectively blocking her. Kaoru was getting frustrated, but her lifelong training made sure she hid her feelings well and kept her focus on her opponent. Yet both women were in a dead heat with no points as time ran out and showing slight fatigue.

"Yame!" The alloted time had expired in the match so the shinpan shunin called the end and then an encho was called, so there was a short interval as the clock was reset.

From the sidelines Kenshin watched in concern, knowing Kamatari was trying to wear down Kaoru, frustrate her enough to force her into making a mistake. He could read the almost casual manner in the larger woman, and her ki was giving off the sense of a cat baiting a mouse. He frowned as he mentally sent encouragement to his love, trying to catch her eye.

_Careful aka-chan, she's playing with you. Don't give in, just wait until she tips her hand and then deliver the final blow. You're getting tired and frustrated but I can sense she is too. Be strong, don't fall into her trap._

Kaoru caught Kenshin's worried glance and as if she could read his mind, sent a twinkling of one eye his direction saying in her head _Don't worry Kenshin-anata, I know what she's doing and plan to make her think I don't. Then use a parry go-no-waza from the Kasshin Ryu to counter her datousu._ As if he had heard the words, he returned the wink and added a grin, making her heart pound at his handsome visage as it always did.

The exchange between the two went unnoticed by nearly everyone but a shady character lurking in the shadows of the exit between section 105 perpendicular from the university bench where Tobei had a clear view. His eyes were peeled on Kaoru and his mind was filled with increasingly violent thoughts with the insane excitement of being so close to his goal. He saw the exchange between Kenshin and Kaoru and his blood began a slow boil as he mentally promised them revenge.

_As soon as this is over, you're mine_ he said silently as he backed deeper into the shadows. . . .

The clock was set for two minutes to decide the match and the encho began as the senshu-gakare called, "Hajime!" to begin.

Kamatari and Kaoru bowed and then they resumed their battle, the cuts and blows coming fast and furious as both women were in earnest, each fighting to the proverbial death. Each were even, scoring points on hits as their individual bokken each made body contact.

Kaoru met each of her opponent's blows with a counterstrike, energized and keeping pace quite effortlessly. She was even enjoying herself, the cheers of the crowd fueling her as she slowly turned onto the offensive as the larger Kamatari was showing slight signs of fatigue. Kaoru then saw a chance to use the succession technique of the Kamiya-Kasshin Ryu, the hontawari. Kamatari was ready to deliver a crushing midsection strike but took a wide swing, allowing Kaoru to use the crossed wrist technique to halt the bokken and then with a quick flick of the wrists, trapped it, pulling the bokken and its bearer forward. Then in a split second, she took hold of her bokken with both hands and delivered a blow to Kamatari's back as she lost balance and fell face down just as the time expired.

"Yame!" shouted the senshu-gakare and the shobu-ari raised Kaoru's arm declaring, "Match point and winner, Kamiya!"

The crowd roared as everybody got to their feet and cheered for the successor of the Kamiya Kasshin Ryu and a former prefecture champion, Kamiya Kaoru. She bowed humbly as the cheers rained down led by Kaoru's group of friends, seated behind the university bench. Misao was the loudest as she whistled with both index fingers in her mouth.

"Wooooo! Way to go, Kaoru-chan!" The diminutive girl jumped up and down as the lanky Sanosuke was flanked by the ever elegant and dignified Megumi and added his own enthusiastic approval.

"Outta sight, Jou-chan! That's givin' it to her!" he bellowed as Megumi covered her ears and nudged him in the ribs.

"Do you have to yell so much?" the med student asked her beau peevishly but he ignored her as he continued cheering and clapping for Kaoru.

She blushed at the effusive praise as she made her way gingerly to the rest of the team who all crowded around her to offer congratulations, including Baisotei-sensei, who patted her on the back and murmured in her ear, "Your father would have been very proud."

That statement caused Kaoru's eyes to well up as she asked, "You really think so?"

The sensei nodded with a smile as Kaoru was turned around and found herself crushed in Kenshin's arms. "I'm so proud of you, tenshi. You were magnificent!" he said joyfully.

She pulled back and asked with bright eyes, "Really?"

He grinned and nodded as he stated, "You'd better believe it," then hugged her tight once more.

Meanwhile, the shinpan-ai all waited for the cheers to die down and then the shobu-ari took the microphone and announced, "Settle down please! Settle down! It's time for the final match."

The crowd sat down and quieted as the senshu-gakare then called out, "The next and final match is between Himura Kenshin and Shishio Makoto. Onegai, step forward."

At the announcement of his opponent Kenshin's eyes narrowed and his smile faded. He gently disentangled himself and leaned down to don his kote and grasp his blunted sakabatou.

Kaoru glanced at Shishio and commented in dismay, "So they're pairing you off with Shishio."

"Yeah." Kenshin said as a scowl gathered on his even features. He took his blade and made some practice swings to prepare.

"Kuso," was all she could say as the sides waited to be called to the court.

"Uh-huh."

Kaoru stared across the ring and watched the lean and swathed man as he readied himself. For Shishio of Team Juppongatana from the region of Hiei had been chosen as Kenshin's opponent to settle the ongoing feud between the two exceptional kendoists that was so intense that it made the front page of the sports page of the newspaper in Tokyo. It was purely for show for the crowd and that annoyed Kaoru as when Kenshin and Shishio fought it was as if it was to the death. As it was the final match to determine points for the championship, it was also the most anticipated and promised to be the fiercest.

Knowing the chemistry that made them such intense rivals, she grasped Kenshin's arm and whispered in his ear, "Onegai, be careful, anata. The last time you fought him, he caused a great deal of injury to you."

He turned and smiled at his love to reassure her. "Don't worry, aka-chan. I'll be fine, that I will." He kissed her pert nose and added, "Keep the faith and wait for me."

"Okay."

She smiled bravely as the shobu-ari called the fighters to thecourt and Kenshin strode over with his sakabatou sheathed at his left hip as Shishio did the same. Both men faced each other warily.

"So we meet again, Battousai," Shishio drawled from beneath his men, which covered every part of his face but his eyes, which were dark, piercing pools.

Kenshin nodded curtly. "Shishio."

The shobu-ari came between the two and briefly explained the terms of the match. Since the tournament was one of individual battles from those kendoists that had ranked high in the season matches, this particular one was a marquee matchup and the crowd was on fire. Both Kenshin and Shishio stood taut with readiness, the animosity already flowing at each other through their ki.

From the sideline Komagata Yumi, sauntered boldly onto thecourt to wish her lover well in a very expressive display of affection, prompting the shinpan-ai to call security to escort the young woman back to the side to the sound of wolf whistles and catcalls. Shishio's girlfriend had a reputation of noteriety due not only to her association with him but as the youngest and highest priced call girl in the prefectures spanning between Kyoto and Tokyo. Rumor had it she also was gaining face time in several adult movies and becoming known as an underground porn star.

Kaoru stared with distaste at the girl in the skintight skirt and low cut leotard top, her eyes on the revealing ensamble, that appeared as if it was sprayed on. _Feh, why didn't she just come in naked?_ she groused as she secretly envied Yumi's full breasts and generous cleavage.

Back at the ring, the shobu-ari announced cryptically, "The match is to be timed for four minutes, no slashes or strikes below the waist, with a one minute encho to be called if no strikes are scored at the end of regulation. Get into position."

Both kendoists did as they were bid, getting into a chodan-no-kamae as the shobu-ari stood at the center, ready to begin. He waited for the clock to be set and then raised his hand to signal the start…

"Hajime!" the senshu-gakare called.

The two combatants came forward in a rush and their blunted sakabatou clanged and echoed in the cavernous venue, above the din of the wildly cheering crowd. This match was truly the clash of the kendo titans as each had garnered quite a following thoughout the season, each garnering great attention and sharing space on the sports pages. The shiai-geiko was in full force as each fighter's strength and skill had them about even. From his vantage point Kenshin was equally on the defense as well as offense, issuing valid cuts and slashes as Shishio parried with his own and then countered, scoring points of his own. The redheaded kendo champion's zan-shin was sharp but so was Shishio's as the two were so evenly matched that there were several aiuchi as the time ticked by.

Kenshin watched warily as he fought, using the Hiten Misurugi Ryu, Ryu Shou Sen to perform a front tsuki, hoping to knock Shishio off balance but the masked man recovered with an agile turn that had him upright again and on the offensive. It was then that Shishio countered with his own move, the homura-dama and sent Kenshin flying off balance momentarily before he too recovered. Undaunted, Kenshin then hit Shishio with a Ryu Tsui Sen when he tried another strike that missed its mark. The Juppongatana Team swordsman fell back as time was called and the duo went to their individual sidelines for a 30 second break.

Over at the sideline Kaoru had watched the match with much trepidation as the scoreboard showed an even number of valid hits by each fighter, creating an encho. Her concern was evident as Kenshin approached, looking a bit worse for wear.

"Kenshin, are you--," she began but was cut off by Baisotei-sensei who went to him and inquired of his condition.

"Himura-kun, are you all right? The last blow he got in seemed to be quite harsh."

Kenshin shook his head and took the bottle of water Kaoru handed him to take a long draught before he answered, "Yeah, but I'm okay. I figured out what he's trying to do and can defeat him during the encho." That seemed to satisfy the sensei so he handed the empty bottle back to Kaoru and said gratefully, "Arigatou, aka-chan."

She took the bottle and asked dubiously, "Are you sure you can defeat him?"

Kenshin grinned and winked at her then leaned in to murmur to her alone, "I plan to win this with the Kuzo Ryu Sen. So don't worry, okay?"

Kaoru gave him a smile as she knew the move to be a very powerful one and it put her mind at ease for while as she watched him stride back to the ring.

Across at the other side, Yumi was hanging all over Shishio as he accepted her attention and took a drink as well before he too returned to the fight. The shobu-ari then explained the terms of the encho…

"The encho will be a sudden-death match with the winner being determined by a complete knockdown. The time limit is two minutes and if no winner is called it will officially be a chusen and the winner will be determined by the shinpan-ai. Understood?"

"Hai." Both chorused in unison.

"Very well then. Bow and get into position." The shobu-ari stepped back as Kenshin and Shishio bowed briefly and Shishio spoke in a snide tone.

"Time to stop playing games, Battousai. I plan to defeat you soundly so get ready to be humiliated."

Kenshin's eyes became amber-tinted slits as he growled, "Don't be so sure, Shishio."

Both turned and got into position as the shobu-ari raised his hand and then the senshu-gakare called "Hajime!"

At the call, Shishio came out aggressively, drawing his sword and using multiple downward slashes as Kenshin used his supernatural speed to block the attacks, instantly on the defensive. But as the slashes came, Kenshin made mental notes of each move and ascertained which technique would bestow absolute and complete victory. He then arrived at the perfect solution and pushed Shishio back with a strong shove, then crouched into a batoujitsu stance.

With glittering garnet eyes Shishio followed suit as he too assumed the same stance but Kenshin's dark fury erupted and he flew forward with a cry, becoming airborne as he executed the penultimate move of Hiten Mitsurugi that Hiko had taught him.

"Hyahhh!" Kenshin cried as he used unbelivable speed to deliver a perfect Kuzu Ryu Sen, hitting Shishio in all nine major points with such force and power that the champion of the Hiei region fell back in defeat.

As he made solid contact with the mat the entire auditorium became hushed as the spectators, the shinpan-ai, and the other kendoists all were stunned by what they witnessed. The shobu-ari, came forward as if in a trance and stared at the fallen fighter who was still motionless, then motioned for the medical personnel to come. The silence was suddenly shattered by one lone clap, followed by another and another until the entire auditorium burst with deafening applause and cheers.

"Yeahhh, Battousai!"

"All Right, Battousai!"

"Way to go, Himura Battousai!"

From behind the university bench Sanosuke was on his feet yelling and stamping as he bellowed, "Yeah buddy, that's the way to show 'im. Outta sight!"

Misao chimed in. "Yeah, you show 'im, Himura!"

Kaoru clapped with tears of joy in her ocean eyes. _I knew you would do it, Kenshin-anata. Well done._

Back in the court , Kenshin was breathing in short gasps, the exertion of his move still evident as he stared at his fallen opponent, worried about the slow recovery of Shishio. For although Shishio was a strong and skilled kendoist, the injuries he had sustained in a freak accident last year, a fire which caused severe burns that covered most of his body and face made him have less endurance. Oblivious to the admiration ringing throughout the auditorium for his win, Kenshin's compassion even for a bitter rival made him sober to the praise. The senshu-gakare had stepped forward and amidst the cheers of the crowd and taken hold of the limp arm of the victor.

"The winner of this encho in a record time of 1.50 is Himura Kenshin! And the bonus added points for breaking the record make him our national champion!"

The cheers became even louder as the entire venue got to their feet and applauded as the entire shinpan-ai surrounded Kenshin to drape the gold medal around his neck. After that theauditorium quieted down as the Prime Minister stepped forward, holding the katana in its lacquered sheath.

He cleared his throat and spoke loudly, "Himura-san, it is with great pleasure I bestow this katana to you on behalf of His Royal Majesty, the Emperor. It honors him for you to have it."

Honored himself beyond belief Kenshin got on his knees and bowed face down before he raised his titian head and replied, "It is I who is honored to be given this gift. Domo arigatou."

He took hold of the weapon reverently and held it as if given the greatest treasure of the world, his emotions such that his eyes glistened with unshed tears as the applause fell in a din of praise.

From the mat the medical staff had revived Shishio with Yumi by him as he was helped up to the sound of cheers for his most hated rival. The sound was like bitter dregs and he felt sick to his stomach, filled with a rage that had him oblivious to everything but one thought….

Revenge. . . .

An hour later, the jubliant crowd had dispersed from the auditorium and a portion of it ended up at **_Guido's_** to celebrate the championship. The champ himself was overwhelmed, inundated with well-wishers and fans cutting off from his friends who had managed to find a booth to sit and wait for him. Aoshi, Misao, Sano, Megumi and Kaoru all waited and observed as Kenshin was at the bar surrounded with a sea of adoring humanity.

Misao, always the one with a glib remark said, "Geez, ya think we'll even get to spend one minute with the new celebrity? Or will we have to make an appointment?"

Sano said airily, "Ahhh, sure we will. Just give him a chance to enjoy it, all this fame is like a drug."

"I don't think Kenshin wants all this attention," Kaoru said. "But he's too polite to brush anyone off so he's probably going to be there for a while."

"Hmmm," everyone agreed as they all watched Kenshin handle his new stardom.

Meanwhile, the door opened and Tobei entered, hiding himself among the throng as his eyes searched and found the object of his sick obsession, Kaoru. He then glanced at where most of the people were crowded, and saw with glee that Kenshin was very occupied, leaving her just with the other friends. He began to wrack his mind with ways to get her away from them then spotted the rear exit where the restrooms were also conveniently located. He grinned as a plan formulated and he wended his way back to the rear to wait. . . .

It was about another hour later when the crowd around Kenshin finally thinned enough so he could join the booth where his friends waited. Still carrying the katana he slid in beside Kaoru as Sano poured him a beer.

"Well, it's about time! We thought you'd be to busy to join us," Misao said in mock reproach as Aoshi flashed a look at her and shook his head.

Megumi stated in a glad manner, "Pay her no mind, Ken-san. We're all very proud of you and are just overjoyed."

Sano nodded as he clapped him heartily on the back, "She's right, pal. Omedeto, you deserve it."

"Here, here!" everyone at the table raised their beer mugs and toasted the new national kendo champ as he blushed and raised his mug. They all drained their mugs at once.

Kaoru finished her beer and then got to her feet as Kenshin looked up questioningly. "Where you going, aka-chan?"

She patted him on the shoulder as she slid past him to exit the booth. "Just going to the little girls' room." She then cuffed him as she snapped, "Baka, I can't believe you made me say that out loud."

"Oww!" he protested, rubbing his head as laughter rippled around the table.

"Imagine that, the great kendo champ, Himura Kenshin, beating Shishio Makoto and getting clobbered by his girlfriend," Sanosuke pointed out and guffawed as Kenshin grinned good-naturedly.

"What can I do, she's the better fighter, that she is."

More laughter followed as Kaoru said loudly over the merriment, "Misao-chan, Megumi-san you want to come with me?"

Sano was his usual irascible self as he asked, "What is it with you chicks having to go take a leak in packs?" while Megumi nudged him none too gently for his crude remark before she refused.

"No thanks."

"Wait, Kaoru-chan I'll go with you!" Misao got up and followed as her friend wove through the crowd and to the restroom…

Over near the pay telephone, Tobei saw his chance as he spotted Kaoru making her way to the ladies room but cursed when he saw that she was not alone. _Kuso, figures she has that itachi with her. But I'll stick around anyway,maybe I'll get lucky _He remained in the shadows as he continued to wait….

In the ladies room, Misao and Kaoru took care of business and then stood by the mirror fluffing their hair and chatting about the tournament and Kenshin.

"Boy what a great day for Himura, huh? He was really awesome." She leaned toward the mirror and applied some pink lip gloss.

"Uh-huh," Kaoru agreed as she leaned toward the mirror and rubbed her cheeks to bring some color to them. She was still in the kendo uniform and did not have her makeup bag so she did what she could to freshen up. But she had a strangely uneasy feeling that made her stay pale that she could not understand.

Always astute Misao picked up on her friend's manner and glanced at her in concern. "Hey, Kaoru, are you okay? You seem a bit spacey."

Kaoru shook herself and said brightly, "Who me? You're imagining it, Misao, I'm fine just a little tired. It was a long day."

"Okay, if you say so," Misao said dubiously. She gathered her things and said, "Let's head back, or Himura will send a search party for you." She opened the door and went out.

"Yeah." _Mou, what is this feeling that something terrible is about to happen coming from. Well, I'd better get back or Kenshin will worry _She opened the door and just as she passed the pay phone, a hand grabbed her arm and another covered her mouth. Terrified, Kaoru struggled and tried to scream as she was pulled to the rear exit.

"Keep quiet," hissed Tobei. "Or I'll snap your pretty neck right here. You're coming with me, now!"

One arm tightly holding her by the waist and the other around her neck, he dragged Kaoru out in the pouring rain, in the alley behind the bar. He then pulled her over about fifteen feet, behind a dumpster and threw her down on some soggy collapsed cardboard boxes. He then stood over her, revelling in his power.

"Well, well. They say good things come to those who wait and now I see it's true. I've waited a long time for this." His eyes glowed with an eerie light as a flash of lightning made him appear ghoulish, causing her to shudder.

"W-what are you planning to do with me?" Kaoru asked fearfully.

"How soon they forget! Remember, I owe you, koi." Tobei crouched down and leaned close as he murmured, "Oh but first we're gonna have some real fun, out here in private." He ran a finger down her cheek and to her chest peeking though her gi as she recoiled. "Y'know, I always thought you were a hot little number and now soaked and wet I can see every little curve of your sweet little body."

He grabbed Kaoru's wrists and held her arms over her head immobile as he straddled her and began to unzip his trousers as with eyes wide she opened her mouth to issue forth a scream. Uttering a curse he viciously backhanded her, splitting her lip and causing drops of blood to run down her neck with the rain.

"I told you to shut up," Tobei growled as thunder crashed around them. "Do that again and I'll knock you out. I don't have to have you awake to get my fun but you might like it better." He leaned in and began to suckle her neck where the blood had dripped from her lip, enjoying its taste.

Her vision blurring with rain and tears Kaoru silently called _Onegai, Kenshin help me!_

Inside at the booth Kenshin was startled by a sudden, malevolent urge in his ki and he frantically scanned the crowd to look for Kaoru. Sano caught his worried scowl and asked, "Hey Kenshin, what's up?"

Without a word in reply Kenshin got up and studied every area of the crowd for the shapely cobalt blue and black kendo uniform like his and shot to his feet when Misao emerged and stood before him. He grabbed her arms and demanded, "Misao, where's Kaoru?"

Her eyes wide with wonder she asked, "What's the big idea, Himura? She's right beh--," Misao glanced behind her and saw that Kaoru was not there. "Well, she _was_ right behind me. She must've got lost in the crowd."

"Kuso!" Kenshin swore as he released Misao and grabbed his katana, his mind on what had happened at the river a few days ago. He took off, leaving everyone puzzled about his hasty departure.

"Hey Kenshin!" Sano called but he was gone.

In a hurry, he pushed through the crowd and made his way to the rear hall where the restrooms, the pay phone, and the rear exit were. Once there, his heart dropped as he saw the rear door swung wide open in the deluge and leading to the back alley.

He raced out the open door and into the driving rain looking back and forth, fear gnawing at his spine as he began to investigate the trash strewn alley. He bellowed, "KAORU! KAORU! Where are you!"

Kenshin slipped the sword in his waistband and now drenched by the downpour he strode to one end of the alley lifting and tossing wet trash as he searched for anything that might be a clue as to where Kaoru had disappeared. He turned at on end and made his way the opposite direction, his terror and rage mounting, making the dark demon within dance with eagerness to be let out. Then above the peals of thunder and the rush of the rainstorm he heard it…

A soprano whimper mixed in with the grunt of a man that came from the vicinity of the large dumpster located a few feet from the bar rear exit door. Warily, Kenshin backtracked and followed as the sounds became louder and more frantic. Then he stopped suddenly and was engulfed in a red haze of fury as he saw what was causing the sounds.

Two familiar slender legs with tabi and black hakama were sprawled spread out on a pile of soaked cardboard with a cobalt blue gi ripped open to expose Kaoru's bound bosom as on top a man was straddled and suckling her like the dirty swine he was. Her eyes were closed and her hair was loose and covering half of her face as she lay limply there, seemingly unconscious.

At the horrific sight of the one most precious being so violated the beast within him burst forth with a vengeance. "YOU FILTHY BASTARD!" Kenshin roared as he drew out his sword.

"Huh?" Tobei was so aroused by the taste of Kaoru after fantasizing about her for so long he was in a daze and blissfully unaware that death was bearing down on him. But by the time he realized the danger it was too late, for his trip on the river Styx was immenent.

"Ryu Tsui Sen!" Kenshin leapt up and swung the sword with all his might, holding nothing back, bringing the blade forward in blinding speed neatly slicing through Tobei's neck and sending his head to the ground in a bloody plop. A geyser of blood sprayed from his severed cartoid artery all over Kenshin as Tobei's body fell back and to the side of the dumpster in a sodden pile of boxes.

Gasping and coming to, Kaoru felt the ease of Tobei's weight lifted from her and the warm spray intermingled with the cool rain. Bemused as she sat up, she slowly opened her eyes and noticed she was covered in blood then looked up to see the headless body of Tobei laying in the trash and Kenshin standing there, with wild red-amber eyes and holding a katana dripping crimson. Numbly she noticed Kenshin was also covered in blood and she glanced up at the rain pouring down and mixing with the blood.

She said to him in a dreamlike tone, "You made it rain blood," then fell back in a dead faint.

Kenshin himself was in a suspended state until he watched Kaoru fall, then he tossed the sword aside and rushed forth to cradle her in his arms, the rain diluting the stickiness of Tobei's blood and binding them together as a flash of lightning bathed the scene in a surreal pink glow.

**NEXT…..SPREZZATURA…..EXPECTING TO FLY**


	14. Chapter 14 SPREZZATURA EXPECTING T

_Author's Note: Here's the beginning to the end of Book 1 of this story. I actually tried to fit everything in here but found that the chapter would be twenty pages and so I'm adding another chapter. The next chapter will be a tear jerker so be prepared. Thanks to the readers and reviewers._

_**Glossary of Japanese terms:**_

_**Watashi no koishii----literally "my beloved"**_

**SPREZZATURA…..EXPECTING TO FLY**

_Sprezzatura is a form of painting technique that is a deliberate carelessness of brush strokes, in other words--planned chaos_

Red…the color was everywhere, from the garish reflected neon glow of the sign for **_Guido's_** to the flashing lights from the police cruiser and ambulance to the crimson flood of life that had drained from Tobei's severed neck and turned the rain puddles to blood. And then there was the fierce visage framed by flame red hair and amber-red eyes that blazed with inhuman rage that delivered the death blow, standing there in the coppery glow of the stormy sky. The downpour had made everything seem nightmarish and fluid, like a watercolor wash, blurred and beyond recognition and it was the last scene Kaoru remembered before everything went black again…..

Tossing the heirloom sword and sheath aside Kenshin rushed forward and cradled Kaoru in his arms, murmuring gently trying to bring her back, but she was not responding. He was so intent in his ministrations that he did not notice that the alley had become filled with curious people from inside **_Guido's _**and Misao, Aoshi, Megumi and Sano had all gathered around him. A hum of comments were scattered amid the amazed group…

_"What the hell happened out here?"_

_"I think somebody got hurt."_

"_Hey man, check it out, the Battousai is covered in blood."_

Then a girl from the bar screamed when she saw the disembodied head and bloody corpse of Tobei and the bartender yelled to the crowding onlookers "Hey somebody call emergency, we need an ambulance and the cops. Some guy lost his head."

A few people went inside and others crowded around to get a better look. More screams followed as women paled and cried out when they saw the horrible sight as a siren wailed in the distance and got closer

Kenshin's friends all encircled the pile of boxes where he sat holding Kaoru's unconscious form, both drenched in rain and blood. He was in a state of inertia like he had become a statue, his glacial blue eyes just staring as the sirens got loud and stopped at the end of the alley. Then there was a sound of car doors slamming and footfalls splashing as they ran through puddles with EMTs and police pushing their way through the throng.

"Step aside please. Step aside." An authoritative voice made the command as uniformed police made their way to the surreal scene and stopped cold when they saw the dismembered body and head of Tobei, and the blood-covered couple sitting on a pile of sodden cardboard by the dumpster. Two police officers continued toward Kenshin and Kaoru and crouched down to ask questions.

"Okay now, what happened here?" A tall middle-aged officer asked as his younger partner leaned over Tobei's headless body and grimaced as he turned and saw the head in a pool of bloody water.

"Looks like a guy got his head chopped off," he said matter-of-factly.

The other police officer glanced at the object and called the EMTs to collect the grisly corpse and head then turned back to Kenshin. "Okay son, now you want to tell me what happened?" He gestured to Kaoru, still out cold in Kenshin's arms. "Is this young lady all right?"

"Iie."

Kaoru lay limp in his arms and the officer gestured to his partner. "Go get the EMTs to get a stretcher for her." As his partner nodded and went to do his bidding the officer tried again, "So you want to tell me what happened?"

Kenshin nodded his head slowly and said in a flat voice, "He was raping her and I killed the son of a bitch."

Sano then came forward and interrupted hurriedly, "Whoa, whoa, buddy. Watch what you're saying here to the officer." He entreated the officer. "My friend is pretty upset so he doesn't really know what he's saying."

"Knock it off, Sano." Kenshin's voice held steel as he repeated, "I killed him."

The officer studied the young man as he reiterated, "You killed him. And that's it?"

Kenshin nodded.

The officer probed, "And you have nothing else to add, nothing to say beside that?"

Sanosuke cut in, "You've got to be kidding me, man."

However, Kenshin shook his head blankly as the officer studied the numb and dazed expression on the redhead's visage and the EMTs came rushing over with a stretcher and then came forward to take Kaoru. But Kenshin, still in a state tightened his arms around her and his voice was a low growl.

"Leave her alone!" he snarled. "Don't you lay a hand on her."

One EMT said politely, "You have to let go of her, sir. We have to take her on the stretcher. She needs medical attention."

"Iie, don't take her away from me," Kenshin's voice was filled with fierce dread and an underlying fear that made the mighty Battousai seem vulnerable in his shattered state.

The middle-aged police officer said in a soft tone. "You have to let her go so the EMTs can take her to get treated." He gently began to pry Kenshin's hand from Kaoru's body as her eyes fluttered open and she gazed at him blankly.

"K-Kenshin? W-what happened?" she stammered as she was coming to, her sapphire eyes wide and frightened, gazing blankly around at all the flashing lights and the murmuring crowd.

His own eyes gazed back, suddenly a soft lavender hue. "It's all right, tenshi. Just take it easy, they want take you to the hospital."

Still holding her Kenshin rose to his feet then gently handed Kaoru to the waiting hands of an EMT when she saw the bloody, decapitated corpse of her tormenter. Upon seeing the gruesome tableau, she fainted again, falling limp during the transfer into the arms of the EMT.

"Kaoru!" Kenshin cried, springing forward to get her back but the officer laid a restraining hand on him.

"Easy son. You're going to have to come with me." He took hold of Kenshin's arm and unresisting, the newly crowned kendo champ obeyed, his head twisted and watching as the EMTs tended to his love. He then went with the police officer to a waiting cruiser with Sanosuke following close behind.

Meanwhile, the rest of his friends stood in shock as the rest of the crowd broke up and wandered back into **_Guido's_** with Aoshi crouching down to retrieve the abandoned katana and sheath. One of the other officers stopped him, insisting to leave it to not smudge the fingerprints so the taciturn man cast a cold glance and complied, then went over to the cruiser with the other men, leaving the two women to check on Kaoru. Having regained full consciousness and blandly insisting she was fine, Kaoru was now seated on the edge of the open ambulance and numbly watched the coroner and EMTs come and take the two pieces of Tobei's corpse and deposit them into a body bag. She stared in morbid fascination, her mind a blank, dazed and in moderate shock as her friends were grouped around her, all frantic over her physical and mental condition.

Misao was seated beside her friend, her arm looped about Kaoru as she asked gently, "How're you doing, Kaoru-chan?"

Her response was to shrug and remain wordless as she stared at the aftermath of the incredible events of the evening, and appeared in a semi-catatonic state much to the rising concern of Misao and Megumi. The latter leaned in and looked deep into Kaoru's eyes, as if she were examining her and then frowned as she made her inquiry.

"Kaoru, I want you to tell me. Did he….?" She sought a delicate way to ask about what had happened but Kaoru shook her head, clutching her shoulders and shivering, her woeful manner answering the question.

At that moment, the EMTs came to the trio and one said gently but firmly, "Miss, we really should take you to the hospital, to have you checked out."

Megumi nodded vigorously. "He's right, Kaoru. You need to have a doctor see you to make sure you're all right." She pulled the unresponsive girl up and pushed her into the rear of the ambulance and then climbed in beside her, much to the surprise of the EMTs.

One opened his mouth to say something but Megumi flashed a brilliant smile and said, "I'm a med student and I'd like to accompany my friend to the hospital if you don't mnd." She gave an appeal with her sherry eyes wide and pleading and the two men melted like butter.

"Of course you may." One fellow smiled as he told his colleague to close the doors but Misao protested as she too jumped inside.

"Hey, she's my friend too. I'm going with you."

Both EMTs exchanged glances and then shrugged and closed the doors for the trip to the ER. . . .

………………………………………………………………………………

The interrogation room of the main station of the Tokyo Metropolitan Police was a dark and dank chamber, in the lower bowels of the cement building, lit only by one lone hanging light. The atmosphere was raw since the room was subterranean, adding to the overall psychological effect to make the suspect talk.

The door opened and a uniformed police officer led a sullen Kenshin inside and pushed him down into a chair where he uncuffed him and then turned and left, closing and locking the heavy door. Once by himself, Kenshin sat ramrod straight, his features impassive but his eyes burned in a lavender-amber tint as he pictured the event in the alley over and over.

_That rat bastard. How dare he touch my Kaoru with his filthy, vile hands and mouth, pushing her and taking her in the garbage, defiling her so. Killing him was right, in fact it was too good for him, if I could I'd like to drag him back from the afterlife and do it again, only this time slow and painful, making sure he suffered the way she's suffered._

His brooding thoughts were interrupted when the door opened and Saito sauntered in, followed by his partner, Okura. Both came over and studied him as he just stared ahead, scowling.

Saito smirked as he remarked, "Well, well look who's here. Chopping a guy's head off is one helluva way to celebrate your new kendo crown, eh Himura?" He lit a cigarette and blew the smoke in Kenshin's face, the latter glaring at him through the blue haze while Saito leaned indolently against the wall smoking.

Okura opened a file sighed, and pointed out, "Yeah, chopping off the head of one Asakura Tobei, with an antique katana none the less." He sat down across from Kenshin and added, "Not my usual type of homicide case, I admit. So what happened?"

Kenshin remained unresponsive and still, his eyes hooded and staring. Okura shrugged and said, "Okay. Well, then here's how it is. Your fingerprints are all over the hilt, and Tobei's blood is all over the blade of the sword. Right now you're looking at an open and shut case of second degree murder, depending on the Kamiya girl's story."

Kenshin looked at him coldly and said, "Fine. I already said I killed him to the cops that brought me in. So let's just leave it at that."

Saito snorted, "Sorry Himura, it's not that easy. We found out a little something about the late Asakura Tobei you might find interesting." He finished the cigarette and crushed it out with his foot.

Okura sighed again and continued, "According to our undercover narcotics forces Asakura Tobei was a drug dealer for Wu Heishin, operating thoughout the university. Heishin is one of the top smugglers from Singapore to Japan of heroin and opium, directly tied to the Honshu yakuza. And Asakura was also Heishin's cousin. You understand the situation here?"

Kenshin did not move a muscle but closed his eyes and replied flatly, "Yeah."

Okura leaned forward and asked again, "So now tell me. What really happened tonight that led to you killing Tobei in that alley, Himura?"

Kenshin opened his eyes and began, "We were all celebrating me winning the championship at **_Guido's_** when Kaoru got up to go to the john. When she didn't come back soon, I began to worry, especially after what happened at the river a few days ago. I went looking for her and found the rear door to the alley open, so I got suspicious and began to look for her out there. I checked one side of the alley and backtracked then I saw it." His face showed his fury coming to the surface again as his eyes narrowed to amber slits.

Okura's eyes were riveted on him as he bade, "Go on."

Kenshin's scowl deepened as he continued in a gutteral tone, "He had her over in a pile of garbage by the dumpster, on top of her like a dog on a bitch as she just lay there helpless so I took my sword and lopped off his head. And if he wasn't so close to Kaoru, I would've lopped off a hell of a lot more."

Saito and Okura both exchanged glances as Okura ventured another question. "Let me ask you this. Have you ever seen Asakura before or did you just act on impulse when you saw your girlfriend in trouble?"

Kenshin glared at Okura and said stonily, "If you're asking if I had a thing going on with him, the answer is not officially. But the guy has been theatening Kaoru for a while, so he'd been asking for it."

"And you gave it to him," Saito finished matter-of-factly, his lupine eyes staring right into the amber orbs of his kendo adversary.

Kenshin met his glare unflinchingly. "Yeah. And you know what? I'd do it again for what he did to her."

His interest piqued Okura leaned in and asked, "What exactly did he do to her besides allegedly raping her tonight?"

Kenshin said cryptically, "He's been threatening her for quite a while." He shot a significant glance at Saito and added, "Right, ookami?"

Okura looked over at his partner who nodded as he injected, "Asakura had gone to the Kamiya dojo during the memorial for Kamiya Koshijiro and tried to attack Kamiya Kaoru but I saw him nab her and drag her out by the storehouse. Since she was a member of my kendo team and a woman, as team captain I felt it was my duty to make sure she was all right. So I followed them and…convinced him to let her go."

The austere countenence of Okura cracked a smirk as he ascertained the way his partner might have 'convinced' Tobei to release Kaoru. "Yeah, I bet you did, partner."

All innocence Saito shrugged as he said, "I was off duty at the time." He smirked and Okura shook his head with a chuckle.

Irked by the private joke and still annoyed by the fact that Saito had been there to rescue Kaoru instead of himself that time, Kenshin was in a foul mood as he snapped, "Okay, so now you know Tobei tried to get to Kaoru before and Saito stopped him. So he tried again tonight and this time I wasted him. Case closed."

Okura shook his head. "Sorry Himura, but like Saito said, it's not that easy. Now, depending on what your girl tells us, we've got justifiable homicide, which makes things better for you with us. But since Askaura was tied to Honshu you now have become a marked man."

"Meaning..?"

Saito lit another cigarette and exhaled a puff as he replied, "Meaning that having bumped off a family member of the Honshu yakuza you now are officially on their hit list, with a big, fat bullseye on your ass. Every assassin in their arsenal will be hunting for you."

Kenshin's eyes did not flicker nor did he flinch as he asked, "So what happens now?"

Okura sighed as he replied, "Well, for tonight at least, you can stay here in the lock up. Your father in Kyoto has been contacted and he's sending a lawyer to attend your arraignment tomorrow and post your bail after charges are dropped. After that, we're got to figure out a way to keep you alive. Based on what your girlfriend says, you should be in the clear because of Asakura's being a suspect in another case and his ties to the Honshu. Because this case is now be linked with a huge drug bust we were in the middle of because we had Asakura Tobei under a microscope and before you killed him, we were building a case to put him and his cousin Heishin away."

Kenshin remarked "So beside being a rapist the sleaze turned out to be a drug dealer on campus. Great." He glanced at the wolf and asked, "And you were aware of all this?"

Nodding, Saito said, "I was watching him at the university to see how his operation worked, who his runners were, his contacts, etcetera. He's got some kid working for him as his delivery boy, but he's hard to pin down." He drew on his cigarette and then continued, "And we also had him under surveillance on a hunch I had when you and Kamiya were shot at the other day."

"Hunch?"

Saito took another drag before he replied, "Aa. Based on his attack on Kamiya the night of her father's memorial, I figured he may be the one taking pot shots at you. So I searched his vehicle before it was impounded. And I found an automatic AK 47 rifle with scope behind the driver's seat and several spent shell casings on the passenger seat and floor." He finished the smoke and crushed the butt out on the floor.

"Son of a--, so it _was_ him shooting at us," Kenshin said, livid. His eyes now had a red tint to the amber color, making him appear like an angry jungle predator. He smashed his fists on the table with a violent curse.

Okura and Saito exchanged a look as Okura stated, "Yeah well everything is moot as we are now in a whole new ball game. And since you killed Asakura, Heishin and his buddies in Honshu will be gunning for you. So after your arraignment and the charges are dropped we'll have to make you disappear."

Indifferently Kenshin just nodded as he absorbed everything yet had but one chilling thought _If they'll be after me then_….._oh no, Kaoru_……

Meanwhile, at Tokyo General ER Kaoru sat silently in an examining room, cleaned up and wearing an oversized johnnycoat. Her university kendo uniform, stiff with Tobei's dried blood, was sticking out of a trash barrel, and her eyes focused dully on the clothing as her thoughts dwelled upon the night and its events.

_My kendo uniform. I guess it's ruined with all that blood all over it…what a waste._ She got up and padded over to the barrel to look at the bloody garments more closely when a knock on the closed door sounded and Megumi entered, concern in her sherry eyes as she approached Kaoru.

"Kaoru?" she asked uncertainly. "How are you?"

Kaoru was almost natural as she said casually, "I was just seeing my kendo uniform all ruined and thinking what a shame I can't use it again. I mean, it would be nearly impossible to get all this blood out, don't you agree?" Absently, she fingered the cloth made hard by the blood.

Megumi nodded as she felt a rising sense of fear in Kaoru's manner and the way she was acting which was quite unusual for a woman who was just raped. Denial was not uncommon in a victim of a sexual assault but it was as if Kaoru was not attacked at all, and that frightened the med student most. She leaned close and examined Kaoru for other signs of emotional trauma as the latter continued staring blankly at the refuse can.

The door opened again and the doctor entered, a middle aged woman who recognized Megumi immediately. "Takani-kun, it's strange to see you here."

Megumi bowed deeply in respect. "Satsuki-sensei, I'm here with my friend." She reached back and took hold of Kaoru's arm to bring her forward. "She was attacked tonight."

The doctor Satsuki consulted the chart and nodded, "Hmmm, I see. She was raped." She leaned in and gazed at Kaoru, speaking gently but firmly, "Kamiya-san, I'm Satsuki-hakase, a gynocological resident here at the hospital and I want to examine you. So have a seat, onegai."

Megumi guided Kaoru to sit on the examination table and pushed her slowly down so she could recline for the doctor to perform a thorough examination. Kaoru complied mechanically as if she were a wind-up doll, buried deep behind the safety of her wall, away from the horrors of reality.

The doctor donned a pair of examination gloves and said, "Now, Kamiya-san, I need you to allow me to do a pelvic exam, the police report requires we do that." She came closer to take hold of Kaoru's legs but as she did it was as if Kaoru burst out of the stronghold in her mind. The girl shook her head and pulled away as she sat up.

"Iie, iie. I don't need you to do that!" Kaoru raised her voice in alarm, the first sign of distress that she had shown since the ordeal in the alley. Megumi's face showed dismay as she saw the conflict arise.

She tried to push her back down as she said soothingly, "Calm down, she isn't going to hurt you---,"

Kaoru pushed her away as she said irritably, "I know that. I'm just trying to say I don't need a pelvic exam."

Satsuki-sensei insisted, "But Kamiya-san, since you've been raped--,"

Kaoru cut her off. "That's what I'm trying to tell you. I wasn't raped. Kenshin killed Tobei before he could go any further."

"Nani?" Megumi was incredulous as she pointed out, "But Kaoru, I asked you and you seemed like he had."

Kaoru shook her head vigorously. "Iie, iie." She got up from the table and clutching her arms she relayed, "Tobei dragged me to the dumpster and pushed me down and was about to… but I passed out. Then when I woke up, I was covered in blood and Tobei's body was without his head. And Kenshin was standing there with his sword out and blood all over him."

There was a pause as Satsuki-sensei said, "Maybe you should be telling this to the police. But in the meantime, let me check you out just to be sure, you've got some bruises on your neck." She reached and touched a purplish splotch on Kaoru's neck, which caused her to flinch.

Megumi agreed, "She's right, you have a few bruises, Kaoru. He must've hurt you in some way."

But Kaoru was unconcerned as she looked right at Megumi and asked, "Where's Kenshin? Where did he go, what's happened to him?" Her eyes were wide and frantic as she grabbed the med student's arms in desperation.

"He was taken in by the police, as far as I know."

At that news Kaoru became even more distressed and she went to the trash to fish out her bloodied uniform, much to the dismay of Megumi and the doctor.

The doctor came and pulled the ruined garments from the distraught young woman. "Kamiya-san, calm down. What are you planning to do with these clothes?"

Kaoru looked at her incredulous as she replied, "What else? I'm going to get dressed."

Megumi shook her head. "Iie, Kaoru. You can't wear those again, they're ruined."

Kaoru whirled on her and snapped, "Then what do you propose I wear? I'm getting out of here and going to the police station to see Kenshin and nobody's going to stop me!."

The heated exchange was interrupted by a soft knock on the exam room door and it opened to admit Misao, carrying a totebag that Kaoru recognized as a bag she used for shopping or the beach. "Hi Kaoru-chan, I got your car and used it to go back to the apartment to get some clean clothes for you. Megumi told me you needed them."

She handed it to her friend and Kaoru opened and saw underthings, a pair of jeans, clogs, a T-shirt, and sweater. She gave Misao a grateful smile. "Arigatou, Misao-chan."

Satsuki-sensei sighed in impatience as she said firmly. "Fine." She gestured to the examination table and added, "Now, Kamiya-san if you'll let me finish examining you, I can sign the discharge paper and you'll be able to leave."

"Okay." Kaoru sighed in acquiescence and sat back down so the doctor could finish her task. The sooner the exam was done, the sooner she could get to where Kenshin was. . . .

Back at Police Headquarters, Kenshin was just led into a cell by an officer in the solitary section of the lockup for safety purposes. The regular lockup had several minor yakuza members so Okura decided to take no chances. With the way the grapevine on the streets worked, especially with the yakuza news, reports about Tobei's gory demise was sure to be spreading like wildfire and Kenshin was certain to already have a price on his head. So since he was needed to be alive to be arraigned the decision had been made to put him into protective custody.

Once inside, the redhead strode over and sullenly took a seat on a cot as the iron bars slammed shut and as he left the guard said in a monotone, "The lieutentant'll be in to talk to ya soon."

Kenshin grunted in a noncommital fashion and sat in quiet contemplation, his mind trying to come up with future contingency plans for his and Kaoru's safety as he heard the heavy outer door close, coming up with just one viable solution. But a commotion outside, muted by the strong portal caught his attention and he heard the unmistakable baritone of Sagara Sanosuke.

"Hey pal, open up the damned door. They said out front we could see him." In spite of the grim circumstances Sano's belligerent tone brought a grin onto Kenshin's lips as he rose to meet them. He had only a moment when the door swung open, allowing Sano and Aoshi into the outer area of the cell. The two young men came to the bars and greeted their friend.

"Man, they really got you on ice here." Sano's observation was punctuated by a long low whistle. "But I guess considering you beheaded a guy, it's only right."

Aoshi nodded as Kenshin came to grasp the bars, his face dark with worry. "Never mind me, Sano how's Kaoru? Where is she?"

"Relax, man. I just called the hospital and talked to Megumi. She's a little shaken up but fine. Turns out you wasted Tobei before he could get far and she wasn't raped after all."

"Hmmmm." Kenshin was thoughtful as he digested the information _so he didn't rape her, I got to her in time_ He skewered Sano with a steady stare and asked, "Is she really okay?"

"Megumi said she was uptight about you," Sanosuke informed him.

Kenshin sighed as he said glumly, "She shouldn't worry about me. As a matter of fact considering what went down tonight, now she'd probably be better off without me in her life." He looked off into the distance, frowning.

Sano and Aoshi both looked dubious and were startled as another commotion sounded outside, this time with familiar and decidedly feminine voices, one stridently demanding to be let in. Aoshi said in his usual deadpan manner, "Looks like she doesn't feel that way."

The heavy door burst open and Kaoru stormed in, followed by Megumi and Misao with the guard and Saito both. Undaunted, Kaoru pushed her way to the cell bars and Kenshin, the two instantly oblivious to the others who were immediately urged out by Saito.

"Kenshin, are you okay?" Her eyes were wide with worry and she grasped the bars while he laced his fingers with hers through the bars.

"I'm fine koibito, don't worry," Kenshin reassured her with a smile. His eyes clouded with concern and he added, "I'm worried about you though, are you okay?"

Kaoru nodded as she said, "He never touched me,"

"Yeah, I know." The redhead turned away averting his eyes. "I murdered him."

"To protect me," she said softly.

"It doesn't matter," Kenshin insisted firmly. "The fact is, I murdered Tobei. And if I were to do it over, I would kill him again." He released her hands and began to pace as he went on in a tortured voice.

"I saw him defiling you, on top of you like a stinking, rutting pig and everything went red. My dark side came out and I wanted to end his life, the desire to kill was overpowering." He turned and came forward, grabbing the bars as he continued.

"Kaoru, you saw my dark side and you know how it changes me when it takes over. Tonight I-I become someone else and I swear aka-chan, I felt like I lost my soul. It scares the hell out of me."

Kaoru said softly, "The fact that you say this proves you didn't."

Kenshin shook his head as he said, "I'm not sure that's true now."

She laid her hands on his gently. "Oh Kenshin."

He sighed, "Aka-chan, onegai listen to me. I'm going to be arraigned tomorrow."

"I know. Saito and the other officer need me to make a statement after I leave you."

Kenshin nodded. "And so I'm asking, as a favor to me, don't come to court. Stay away, Kaoru."

Her sapphire eyes widened with dismay. "Kenshin-anata, you can't be serious. Of course I'm going." But she was shocked at the vehemence of his response.

"Kuso, I said don't come and I mean it!" he snapped, pulling his hands away abruptly. He turned his back on her and said roughly, "Not only that, you need to stay away from me from now on, for your own good. So you'd better just leave here now and forget all about me."

Kaoru visibly trembled as the words hit her like individual, jarring blows. Her eyes welled up and a single jewelled tear made its way down her ivory cheek, thinking she was in a nightmare._ This can't be happening._

"Kaoru onegai," he finished quietly. "Don't make me say things to hurt you more than I already have."

"K-Kenshin," she stammered as the tears flowed in earnest but he said no more and did not turn around. However, used to rejection all her life from those she loved, Kaoru took the message and turned to the door walking slowly, her heart breaking with the knowledge that this was the last she would see of him as she opened the heavy steel door. But before she exited she had one last thing to say…

"Kenshin, I want you to know something. No matter what you did, have done, or ever would do I love you and will always love you. Nothing will ever change that."

Kenshin still stood with his back to her as she finally took her leave, the door closing with a loud bang and he flinched at the sound of closure. Alone now, he went to the cot and sat down weeping bitterly. _Forgive me, watashi no koishii Kaoru…._

……………………………………………………………………….

The next day was the arraignment, and Kenshin was present in the courtroom, clad in a clean change of clothes, courtesy of Sanosuke, who had retrieved his belongings from both the dojo and apartment. He had them stored in his car, waiting for the outcome of the arraignment, bringing some to Kenshin for court. And as he requested, Kaoru was not in atttendance, for which he was relieved as he was sure that yakuza members were present and watching and he dis not want them to see that she was his woman.

The attorney Hiko sent, Ikari Kuzoburo was seated beside him as the waited for the case to be dismissed, as was explained to them by Officer Okuro due to Tobei having been under investigation for alleged drug running. And when the judge heard the statement Kaoru had given about Tobei's threats and attacks toward her, he formally dropped the charges. Afterwards Kenshin and Sano met with Saito and Okura to discuss the next move. Making sure they were not being followed or watched, the foursome entered Okura's dark sedan.

Okura pointed out, "Now we gotta come up with a way for you to disappear to throw the dogs off the scent. Heishin and the Honshu syndicate aren't fools and they will be hot on your trail, and those close to you. So you'd better talk to your girlfriend."

At those words Kenshin scowled as he bit out. "That won't be necessary. I broke up with her yesterday." His expression did not invite further discourse so Okura left it alone…

But that was not the case with Sanosuke who did a double take and grabbed Kenshin by his shirt collar, shaking him like a mongrel. "What the hell did you say?"

Kenshin was unruffled as he said dourly, "You heard me."

"Yeah, and I still can't freakin' believe it," Sano said, dropping him. "So what the hell is the matter with you baka, the way you've been talkin' lately about Jou-chan I figured she was The One."

Kenshin said nothing as Saito sighed impatiently and ordered, "Let's can the soap opera and get back to business. Himura, we need for you to go underground so we can make it seem like you disappeared. And Tori-atama there came up with a great idea."

Sano glared at the lupine cop and said, "Yeah. I got this friend Tsukioka Tsunan who's an artist and he has a beach house in a very secluded area of Choshu, up on some of the rocky coast that's not accessable, at least not easily. I've asked him if you can stay there temporarily and he agreed."

Kenshin scanned the three and asked, "So when did this get decided?"

Okura replied, "Last night after all your friends visited you."

Sano added, "Yeah, I had Aoshi take the girls home and then I talked to Okura and Saito and they thought it was a good idea."

Kenshin sighed and asked, "So when is this going to happen?"

"Soon as we're finished here." Sano looked at the two officers and added, "I got all your gear in the trunk of my car and Tsunan gave me the keys so whenever you're ready…,"

Okura and Saito exchanged a glance and Okura stated, "We're done for now. But we'll be in touch."

Without a further word, Kenshin and Sanosuke exited the vehicle. . . .

The drive from the courthouse to Choshu was about an hour, in heavy traffic and in dead silence between the two men who had been friends since school days. The grim circumstances that created the chasm was like a thick, impeneatrable wall that kept Kenshin and Sano silent the entire way to the beach house. Sanosuke had the road on which to concentrate but Kenshin kept reliving the parting with Kaoru over and over and each time, the pain struck his heart like a flaming arrow. His mind knew no rest but yet his resolve became ironclad, he would do whatever was necessary to keep her safe…

Even if it meant breaking her heart….or his own.

The red Corolla turned down a tree-lined dirt road that looked that it had not been traveled in centuries, throwing up clouds of dust as it crept along and stopped before a rather rundown looking house that was built on the lands edge of a rocky cliff, waves crashing against them in an ocean rhythm. Large deciduous trees surrounded it and obscured it from all sides but the one facing the sea, making it a perfect hideaway.

Sano pulled close to the dwelling, made of weathered wood slats that were whitened with salt, having been exposed constantly to the sea air. He killed the motor and spoke for the first time since they were in the police car.

"Well, here we are. Home sweet home at least for a little while."

Kenshin said nothing as he stared sullenly ahead, his eyes a frosty blue. Sano glanced at him and sighed, "Let's go get your stuff and go inside."

"Hmmm," was the only response as Sano shrugged and opened the car door to exit….

Over in Tokyo, on the outskirts of the university campus, a very fashionable apartment building, a bit better then the average student housing unit is where a dark colored limosine with dark windows pulled up. The rear door opened and Wu Heishin stepped out and approached the door of the unit numbered 3, withdrew a key from his pocket and inserted it in the door to unlock it and let himself in.

Once inside, Wu closed the door and switched on the track lights, illuminating the modernly furnished apartment, with leather and chrome, immaculate and expensive looking even for a young male college student. He scanned the area casually, and spotting a chrome and glass wet bar, went over to reach for a bottle of Absolut Vodka and a tumbler to pour a drink when there was the sharp click of a gun cocking.

"Don't move," an adolescent male voice growled. "Or I'll blow your freaking head off."

Heishin finished pouring and lifted the glass to his lips to take a sip, ignoring the surly teen with white hair, standing there with a 9mm automatic pointed right at him. He knocked back the rest of the drink and then said pleasantly, "I don't think you're that dumb." He then got up and with his sunglasses still in place, he said, "You must be Enishi."

The youth did not waver and replied shortly, "Yeah, that's right. Who the hell are you?"

Heishin answered, "I'm Tobei's next of kin, his cousin Wu. You hear what happened last night?"

Sullen, Enishi nodded, "Yeah."

Actually, one of the other runners, a guy named Ito had been at **_Guido's_** last night stopping in for a drink just after the incident and did not see what happened but was told by a bartender that the top kendoist on the university team, Himura Kenshin had gotten ito a fight with Tobei and chopped his head off with a katana. Enishi had been enraged and shocked by the news involving yet another person close to him whose life was ended by the redheaded bastard and his hunger for revenge intensified. He had decided to get his gear together and was just trying to figure out what he was going to do when Heishin arrived. He lowered the gun and still wary, sat in a bar chair.

Heishin sat again, beside the youth and said, "Tobei told me that you were working for him. Told me you were a hard worker."

"Yeah, what of it?"

Heishin lowered the shades and peered at the boy over them. "He worked for me, you know. And I was just thinking that you might want to come to Shanghai and work for me, now that he's gone."

Enishi was intrigued but still suspicious. "Doing what?"

"Same thing you've been doing, delivering orders, etcetera. Only I can train you so you can advance." He gestured to the gun, still in Enishi's hand. "Even teach you to use that."

Enishi lifted the gun and scoffed, "I already know how to use it, man."

Heishin remarked, "But not well." And with those words, he moved lightning fast and disarmed the boy with little effort. He chuckled as he pointed the gun and said, "Without breaking a sweat."

Enishi's teal eyes widened as he found himself staring down the barrel of the gun he had held just seconds ago. Cold sweat drops of fear formed on his face as his heart pounded, feeling an impending sense of doom. But Heishin chuckled again and flicked the safety on as he gestured with the 9mm.

"Relax, kid. I'm not gonna shoot you." Heishin slipped the gun in his waistband. He examined Enishi with a speculative gleam as he commented, "You know, I like you. You remind me of me at your age, all rebelious and mad at the world. So how about you come with me and I give you a chance to make some real bread." He got up and paced a bit as he added, "And Tobei told me you got someone you want to pay back for the death of your sister, and now so do I. So how about we help each other do that, huh?" He then asked, "Where's your stuff?"

Enishi tossed his head toward a small hallway that led to the bedrooms and bath. "Back there. I was just getting ready to split before you came."

"Great. So grab it and meet me out front in my car, Enishi." Heishin headed for the door and said, "I'll be waiting," before he let himself out.

Enishi got up, his mind whirling with the bizarre twist of fate that he had been dealt in the stretch of a day. He headed for the room that was his while he stayed with Tobei, picked up the duffle bag with his belongings and headed out. . . .

**NEXT…..STIPPLE…..ENDED WITH A CRY**


	15. Chapter 15 STIPPLE ENDED WITH A CRY,

_Author's Note: Well here's the update and it had been 24 pages so I split it into two parts. But you will see that they wrap up Book 1 and will segue into Book 2, which will follow shortly. I had thought about making Book 2 as a continuation of "Portrait in Blue" but I felt that it's fine standing alone as it is. And long enough--:) Thanks for all the support, readers, and especially reviewers. Part 2 will be posted tomorrow night._

**STIPPLE…..ENDED WITH A CRY, PART 1**

Both Kenshin and Sanosuke entered the beach house, with Sano flipping the light switch on to illuminate the place. Because it only had one area where light was allowed in, a sliding glass door that led out to the ledge to the sea, it was naturally dark, even in the daytime. Carrying two bags of groceries Sano dropped his load in the tiny kitchenette as Kenshin took his duffle bag with his clothes to a small room, where a futon was located. He then came out and looked around, noticing that the dilapidation of the dwelling was confined to the outside, for inside it had all the comforts one could need, with a television and streamlined stereo system, a stone fireplace, and simple but comfortable furniture. A drafting table, with all the acutremont for creating art was in the corner closest to the glass door.

Kenshin stood there, examining the place as Sano put the foodstuffs away, conversation between the two still sparse as the tension between them was hanging about like a fog, heavy and dank. Feeling somewhat guilty Kenshin watched as Sano acted the part of a faithful servant, and decided to break the silence between them.

"So this is your friend Tsukioka-san's place, huh?"

Sano kept storing cans in a cupboard as he replied, "Yeah. He lives in a loft over his gallery most of the time but has this place to come to when he wants to be alone."

Kenshin said softly, "I'm indebted to him for offering this, that I am. And to you for setting it up. You're a great friend, Sano."

Sanosuke grunted as he remarked, "Yeah well, there's a bunch of people you matter to. Me, Megumi, Misao, Aoshi. And a very important person that you---,"

"Stop!" Kenshin snapped, interupting him. "Don't go any further, Sano. As a friend I'm asking you, okay?" He whirled and went to the glass door, scowling but Sano was undaunted. He came from the kitchenette, grabbed Kenshin's shoulder and turned him around roughly to face him.

"Look man I'm gonna cut to the chase, I know how you feel about Jou-chan. I've practically grown up with you and never saw you have it so bad for a chick before, even Tomoe. So why'd you dump her?"

Kenshin's eyes became hooded chips of blue ice as he said nothing so Sano continued…

"I mean, you've been living a the dojo with her since her father's accident, so I guess you've laid her by now so--,"

With those words out of his mouth in a split second Sanosuke found himself up against a wall staring into amber eyes that held no mercy. Those eyes bore into him as the dark side of Kenshin warned him he had gone too far.

"If you ever speak of her in such casual, vulgar terms again, friendship or not, you'll regret it. 'Cause I will kick your ass." Kenshin was more than a half a foot shorter than Sanosuke but his strength from wielding a sword was vast and his fury made him even more formidable.

With his eyes wide Sano swallowed hard and gave a shaky chuckle. "Hey man, take it easy. I didn't mean to disrespect Jou-chan, you know I think the world of her. I just wanted to know why you broke it off with her, that's all."

Kenshin closed his eyes and sighed, then released Sano. "Gomen, Sano." He stepped back and sighed again as he went on. "I'm trying to protect her. You heard what Saito and his partner said I'm a marked man and everybody's coming after me. I can't take the chance that they may target Kaoru too." He opened his eyes and looked directly at Sano in earnest. "If anything were to happen to her because of what I did, I'd never forgive myself."

Sano nodded as he said, "I understand where you're coming from but she probably thinks you've rejected her because of Tobei trying to rape her. At least that's what Megumi tells me."

"Really?"

"Uh-huh."

Sano cringed as he told Kenshin what he remembered from last night and what happened at the dojo. After giving her statement to the police, Kaoru went home with Aoshi, Misao, and Megumi with both girls staying with her just to be sure. After he met with Saito and Okura, he had driven to the dojo to pick up Kenshin's belongings so after court they could make a clean getaway and get him off of the street. But when he came and told Kaoru that he was going to do that, her reaction was gut-wrenching, to say the least….

_**Sanosuke knocked on the Kamiya Dojo door. It was late, in the wee hours of the morning and he had just finished spending an hour with Saito and Okura to plan a way to have him "disappear" after his arraignment so the Honshu yakuza would not find him. His buddy, artist Tsukioka Tsunan had offered his beach house as a temporary place and so he had gone to the apartment and packed all of Kenshin's clothes and then headed to the dojo to do the same.**_

"_**Who is it?" a suspicious feminine voice asked.**_

_**Sano immediately recognized the voice. "It's me, itachi. Open up."**_

_**The door slid open and Misao's gamin face showed annoyance. "Don't call me that, baka!" she snapped as she stepped aside and let him in. **_

_**He turned and asked, "So how's Jou-chan?"**_

"_**Follow me and find out for yourself." **_

_**The brusque command indictated that things were not good so with a chill in his belly Sano obeyed and trailed Misao as she led him to the parlor where Megumi was sitting on a cushion beside Kaoru who was sitting on the floor, her back to the sofa. Megumi looked up and Sano's heart caught at the scene as Kaoru looked numb and lost, like a homeless waif, her face ashen and her eyes bleak. He caught Megumi's eye and nodded at her silent plea then crouched down beside Kaoru.**_

"_**Jou-chan, honey. How ya doin'?" He laid a gentle hand on her shoulder.**_

_**Her eyes, usually sparkling like polished sapphires were lusterless as she glanced at him and shrugged indifferently, the gesture making her even more vulnerable and his heart constricted.**_

"_**Why are you here?" Kaoru's voice was soft and distant, locked away behind her wall.**_

_**Guilt overwhelming him Sano replied a bit shaky, "W-why I'm here to see how you are, Jou-chan. I've been worried about you."**_

"_**Well, as you can see, I'm fine," she answered in a clipped tone as Megumi stared at her in disbelief.**_

"_**Kaoru," she admonished but the girl glared at her as she repeated.**_

"_**I said I'm fine and I'm fine." She then lowered her head and said no more, dismissing any further questions from anyone.**_

"_**Well," Sano said getting up as he decided to bite the bullet and state his real purpose of the late night (or early morning) visit. "Then if you don't mind, can you tell me where Kenshin's room is?"**_

_**Misao glared at him and demanded, "And why do you need that, tori-atama?"**_

_**He glanced at her askance as he stammered, "I-uh, need to get his things."**_

_**Misao gasped as she and Megumi both shot looks at Kaoru but the latter sat there as if she had not heard. Misao hissed, "Nice going, baka!"**_

_**But Kaoru then surprised everyone as she spoke in a dead tone, "It's down the hall, across from mine. You can check the dryer in the kitchen, he may still have some things of his in there." She got up and walked slowly to the doorway and said over her shoulder, "Follow me and I'll show you."**_

_**Megumi got to her feet and came over to say in irritation, "Why'd you have to come now to do this, Sanosuke? You know what happened at the jail, and that just about did her in."**_

_**Sano sighed as he said, "I know, kitsune, I know. But Kenshin's gotta have his things so tomorrow he can take off after the arraignment."**_

_**Megumi's eyes widened as she asked, "Take off? What's that mean?"**_

_**Misao piped up, "Yeah, what gives?"**_

_**Sano opened his mouth to reply but Kaoru's voice called him and he shrugged at both women and went down the hall. . . .**_

As he finished Sano sighed as he saw Kenshin's face become shadowed with concealed pain and that his friend was as shattered as Jou-chan was. He reached a hand on his shoulder and tried to be sympathetic.

"Look Kenshin, I know you're doing what you feel is best but to walk away from what looks to me to be the love of your life is just….,"

"Stupid? Dumb? Bonehead? Did I leave anything out?" He turned away and walked to the bar separating the kitchenette and sat down with a scowl.

Sano came over and said, "Well, if you know that then, why? You know how it's tearing your heart apart. And if you saw the way she was last night."

Kenshin sighed as he cut in, "I know Sano, I saw her when I did it and I could kill myself for hurting her that way. Seeing that beautiful face streaked with tears, tears that I caused." He then got up and said in an emotional voice filled with conviction, "But if I had a choice of seeing her in heart pain that I caused to seeing her dead, I'd rather bear her tears. At least if she cries, she's still alive. And I'll do anything to make sure she stays alive."

Sano saw the raw determination in the amber-lavender depths of Kenshin's eyes and sighed in surrender. "Look pal, I'm not here to judge you. Kami knows I'm no example with my relationship with the kitsune. But I do know this that if I were in your shoes, I'd probably do the same to protect her."

He walked to the door and stated, "I've gotta split now 'cause I gotta get ready for the art show at school tonight. Me and the kitsune are going to offer Jou-chan moral support."

"Yeah." Kenshin sat down with a faraway look staring out the glass door at the late afternoon sun where golden waves crashed. He added, "Give her all my best wishes for tonight, okay?"

"Sure."

Sano opened the door and left, closing the door firmly and leaving Kenshin alone with his thoughts, staring at the silhouettes of seagulls flying in formation against the sky. He went over to the glass door and slid it open, stepping out onto a very rough wooden deck that led out to the rocky ledge that became a seawall, jutted out into the water. Then he noticed on his right that several smooth, flat stones that acted like stairs leading to a small patch of beach. So he climbed down to go to the shoreline to walk and brood. As he walked along, Kenshin watched the waves crashing and his thoughts were of the last time he was on the beach, the day he and Kaoru scattered her father's ashes and he had declared his love to her. Seagulls cawing around him, he looked up and noticed something.

_Wow, the sky looks just like it did that day in Yokohama, when we scattered Koshijiro-sama's ashes, the day we first shared our true feelings. That day I knew Kaoru owned my heart completely, like no other before her._

He closed his eyes and inhaled the sweet scent of the sea and went back in time to a similar place where the breeze held the tang of salt intermingled with the delicate fragance of jasmine. When he held a soft, warm raven haired angel whose heart was aching over the death of her father and wanted nothing more than to hold her and protect her from any more pain. And now he had caused her to be hurt again…

At that thought Kenshin opened his eyes and he saw that he was in a different time and place, alone. The pang of disappointment hit him like a physical blow and he sighed to try to ease the ache as he began to walk back to the incline and the house. But then something washed up to the shore by the waves caught his eye and he squatted down to see it more closely. It was a small mollusk shell, in muted tones that went from soft pink to a blushed white with a pearlescent shine that had shades of lavender and blue, a truly beautiful thing that represented both delicacy and strength, the perfect contradiction. Kenshin picked up the shell, admiring it and thinking of the girl that bore the same attributes.

Rising to stand, Kenshin stared at the shell and closed it in his hand, then continued back to the house. . . .

That night, the atrium of the adminstrative building at the university was the location of the big end of semester art show and competition, a gala event to cap off the end the school year. And it was crowded with students, faculty, families and friends to see the best work of the art department prominently displayed. Dressed impeccably in a clinging midnight blue dinner dress and her lustrous raven hair worn long as she was hidden within the crowd of people in the atrium, Kaoru did her best to portray herself as calm and composed as she could. However, inside she felt as if she were dying inside, piece by excrutiating piece, reliving the nightmare of the last few days. She closed her eyes and sighed as she stood around, feeling as if she were an apparition watching a scene from another dimension, like she was there but was not really. Or she wished that as the last thing on her mind was the art competition when the rest of her life had spiraled so incredibly out of control. But she dammed up her emotions stoically as she put up a brave front for appearances' sake.

Her eyes scanned the atrium disinterestedly as she took note of the big turnout. Kaoru panned the room, seeing that there appeared to be quite a commotion in one specific area. There, a large group crowded around a very striking and unusual piece, one that appeared as if it were made up of several independent paintings in one, an unusual composition as it was all one subject, a young man with sunset red hair and intense eyes, with each different head shot drawing the viewer to his eyes and the raw emotions within. Kaoru sighed as she realized that her portrait of Kenshin had garnered the lion's share of the crowd's attention including that of the judges.

At the portrait, Omura-sensei stood and explained the origin of the piece. "This is the work of one of my students, a very gifted young lady who submitted this as the final project in my portrait painting class. Entitled 'Portrait In Blue' the artist is Kamiya Kaoru."

He looked over at Kaoru and gestured for her to join him. She sighed and pasted a polite smile on her face for appearances and came over to address the group. Bowing in respect she fielded various compliments for her work as she inwardly screamed.

"This is a marvelous piece, Kamiya-san."a tall, thin woman remarked, writing notes in a pad as a tall young man stepped up to examine the painting more closely. Kaoru bowed and gave her thanks.

"Arigatou."

"Hmmm," the man said, his long staight hair hanging in a curtain around his face, partially concealing a handsome visage with unusual blue green eyes, and a headband around his head. He stood tall, like Sanosuke and wore a casual but dressy gray suit with a black shirt, looking very trendy. "This is a very striking piece. Especially the way you captured the eyes, like you were mesmerized by them. Is the subject someone you know?"

Kaoru sighed softly and flashed a sad smile as she nodded.

The man noticed her manner and apologized, "Forgive my rudeness in not introducing myself. I'm Tsukioka Tsunan, owner of the Kaigan Gallery in Yokahama."

Kaoru bowed deeply as she murmured, "I am honored to meet you."

Tsunan returned the bow and then looked at the painting again. "The subject is a friend then?"

Kaoru replied softly, "Hai."

"I figured such." He gestured to the painting of Kenshin. "The delicate brushstrokes are full of passion and indicative of your feelings for him. He must be good friend."

"A very good friend," Kaoru stated in a voice thick with emotion. If the present direction of conversation continued, the dam was sure to burst as tears were stinging her eyes and began to blur her vision. But she was rescued by the hearty baritone of Sanosuke, booming over the polite murmur of the sophisticated crowd as he and Megumi wended through them and over to her.

"Yo Jou-chan! Hey!" Sano's voice carried much to Megumi's embarrassment as she jabbed him none-too-gently to admonish him. "Watch it, kitsune! That hurt!"

"Really tori-atama, you're like a bull in a china shop," the med student said peevishly and then added, "Look around you, this isn't a barroom so be a little genteel." Both arrived to where Kaoru and Tsunan stood and Sano's face split into a wide grin.

"Tsunan, you big turd, what the hell are ya doin' here?" Sano separated from Megumi and grasped Tsunan's shoulders to greet his old friend.

"Sano, you big baka, what brings you here? This isn't your usual scene," Tsunan returned the grin as he too grasped Sano's shoulders and the two men greeted each other with affection while Kaoru and Megumi watched.

The men then broke away as Sano asked again, "So tell me, what's a big time artist doing here at the university art show? Getting a look at the competition?"

Tsunan replied, "Actually, I'm here as a judge and I have a few more paintings to look at so I have to leave." He bowed to Kaoru and Megumi and then with a hearty slap on the back to Sano, took his leave. Unknown to the women, however, Tsunan exchanged a glance with Sano, who nodded imperceptibly, a sign to meet later. . .

However, always perceptive, Megumi tugged at Sano's sleeve, pulled him aside and asked, "What was that all about?"

"What was what all about?" Sanosuke was all innocence with eyes wide.

Shrewd as always, Megumi was not biting."That little exchange between you and Tsunan has something to do with Ken-san, doesn't it?" Her own sherry orbs probed him without mercy.

Sano sighed and glanced over at Kaoru, who was standing numbly, her eyes focused ahead blankly as she stared at Kenshin's portrait. He murmured to her, "Yeah. He's staying at Tsunan's beach house in Choshu, hiding out."

"Hiding out? Why?"

Sano's voice lowered a scale as he replied, "Tobei was a member of the Honshu yakuza when Kenshin whacked him so he's a main target now. Saito and his partner at the police decided to get him hid while they create a way for him to disappear."

Megumi nodded in understanding. "So that's why he broke up with Kaoru."

"You got it."

Megumi shook her long raven tresses in disgust. "You men are something. You either have no brains or when it comes to using the ones you do have, you haven't a clue." She sniffed as she added, "You guys are so dense when it comes to women."

Irked by her scorn Sano hissed, "And what the hell does that mean, kitsune?"

She pierced him with a direct look and replied, "It means that you don't give us the credit we deserve because we're women. These are modern times, you know, we're strong and don't shatter like china. Besides, Tobei's been stalking her for a while, what makes you think that she's not a target herself?"

Sano's eyes widened and opened his mouth to reply but he was interrupted by Kaoru who came over to them with a slightly suspicious look. "Hey what're you guys whispering about over here?"

Sano and Megumi exchanged a quick glance and then he answered cheerfully, "Nothing, Jou-chan. Just me and the kitsune chewin' the fat."

"Uh-huh." Kaoru appeared dubious as she studied the feigned casual attitude of the couple. She changed the subject as she stated, "Well, I've had enough and I think I'm going home."

"But they haven't announced the winners yet," Megumi pointed out. "Aren't you the least bit interested to see if you won a prize?"

Kaoru shrugged disinterestedly. "Not especially," she said as the PA system squaked and the hum of the crowd died down. Curious, the three cast their eyes toward a podium at the front of the atrium where Tsunan and Omura-sensei were standing.

The feedback faded as Omura-sensei made an announcement. "Ladies and gentlemen, may I have your attention, onegai?" The room completely quieted down so he continued, "First, I'd like to introduce Tsukioka Tsunan, a former student and now owner of the Kaigan Gallery in Yokohama."

The crowd applauded politely and Tsunan bowed to accept the acclaim as Omura went on…

"And I'd like to thank Tsukioka-san for offering his insight by agreeing to be the judge of our annual end-of-the-year Art Competition. This year, in addition to the first, second and third place ribbons, each winner will be showcased in the Kaigan Gallery for an entire year with an option to be signed by Tsukioka-san as a permanent artist in the gallery."

The news brought an awed response from the crowd coupled with another round of enthusiastic applause, the students buzzing with excitement. Over to the side, Megumi and Sanosuke both were thrilled and addressed Kaoru eagerly.

"Didja hear that, Jou-chan? Tsunan's gallery is one of the biggest in Yokohama and a real tourist trap for people from the West, especially America," Sano pointed out as he showed his enthusiasm.

"Yeah, nice," Kaoru said in a neutral tone which drew amazed looks from him and the med student as Omura called for order.

"Excuse me, onegai." The room again quieted down as the art professor went on. "And now I'd like to announce the winners in each of the categories of entries starting with…." He began announcing the winners and Kaoru sighed impatiently as she tried again to leave.

"Look, guys I'm really beat and the crowd's getting to me so I think I'm going to---," her words were cut off by the announcement of her name.

"…'Portrait In Blue' by Kamiya Kaoru."

Everyone around her glanced over and smiled as the room erupted into applause while Megumi and Sanosuke both added their praise.

"Omedeto, Kaoru," Megumi said with a bright smile and Sano made a loud whoop.

"All right, Jou-chan! Way to go!" He reached over and wrapped his arm about her, squeezing her shoulders, as she responded in surprise.

"Huh? Oww, let go of me, Sanosuke, I can't breathe!" She elbowed him to release her as Omura-sensei spotted her and spoke to her directly over the clapping.

"Kamiya-kun, onegai come up to receive your prize."

Incredulous, Kaoru asked dumbly, "My prize?"

Megumi said crisply, "You just won 'Best In the Show' for your portrait of Ken-san."

She gently pushed through the crowd as she and Sano guided the shocked artist to the podium as the sea of humanity parted and contined to clap for her. They finally resurfaced at the front and Kaoru walked up to the podium where Omura hung a gold medal on her and handed her the blue ribbon. Still in a state of shock, Kaoru nodded woodenly as Tsunan and Omura flanked her.

"Omedeto, Kamiya-san," Tsunan said as the applause finally died down and Omura spoke to her and into the microphone.

"Kamiya-kun, would you like to say something?" he asked as he stepped back to give her space, leaving her alone at the mike and so Kaoru stood there suddenly shy, a blush tinting her cheeks as the last of the applause died down.

"Uhhh," she began as she stared across the mike at the room filled with fellow classmates, friends, and family members, all waiting for her to speak. It was like an absurd circus, a nightmare as inside she was shattering. Swallowing hard Kaoru pasted a brave smile on her face.

"A-arigatou, minna. I am very honored to accept this for my work." She turned and saw that in the interim of her coming forward, someone had retrieved the portrait and it was now displayed on an easel by the podium, for all to see. Her smile faded as her eyes focused on her beloved Kenshin's image and blotted out everything else as she went on.

"This was a labor of love, a portrait of someone very precious to me," she said softly, causing the room to become completely silent in order to hear her. "As I worked on it, we became so close, and there was more revealed to me of his soul, through his eyes. He has the most amazing eyes."

Her gaze dreamy Kaoru touched the canvas lovingly and the room was hushed in anticipation as everyone waited for her to continue. But in the rear, a figure hid behind a column and watched the crowd behind dark sunglasses, scanning as if to look for someone.

Kaoru sighed as she caressed the canvas and rambled on as if she were talking to herself. "He is an amazing man, kind, generous, thoughtful. His ways are so strong and yet so gentle. He helped me through the most difficult time of my life, the death of my father."

Omura cleared his throat to gain her attention. "That's very commendable Kamiya-kun but we must….," he said gently.

As if she were suddenly awakened, Kaoru shook herself and turned to see the entire roomful of people, all staring at her and hanging on her every word. Reality of the moment brought the remembrance of Kenshin's cold dismissal of her the other night and embarrassed by her display, Kaoru bowed and apologized as she wrapped it up.

"F-forgive me. Arigatou once again for this honor."

Head lowered in shame, she quickly exited the podium and ran though the crowd amidst scattered applause and murmured comments. Tears she could no longer hold back blurred her vision as she made her way through the press of bodies, people offering their congratulations as she passed.

Both Omura and Tsunan looked flabbergasted as Megumi and Sanosuke both looked at them and then made to follow Kaoru but Tsunan grabbed Sano's arm before he could leave.

"Hey Sano, we need to talk." He gestured to the back of the room and the exit into the outer foyer.

Sano nodded and with a backward glance at where Megumi and Kaoru went, followed his friend through the crowd. As they passed the columns in the rear, the figure in the shadows took note and followed….

Inside the foyer, Kaoru had hurried into the ladies room, mortified by her emotional display and the fact that she did what she had promised herself she would never do, fall apart in public and let anyone see her break. But that asperation was shot now she realized as she walked to the mirror to inspect the damage to her meticulously applied makeup.

_How pathetic! _Kaoru scoffed at her tear streaked image in the mirror. _You let everyone in that room see what a lovesick fool you are for a man who couldn't care less. Baka!_

Her self chastisment was interrupted when the ladies room door opened and Megumi entered, coming right over to her. The med student reached for a box of tissues and proffered it to her.

"Your mascara's running," Megumi pointed out quietly.

Sniffling, Kaoru nodded her thanks and took a tissue, dabbing at the tiny black smudges as Megumi took a seat in a mauve easy chair. Kaoru ran some water to wet the tissue and wiped at her eyes carefully, as not to cause further damage. Finishing her repair work, Kaoru tossed the tissue and turned away from the mirror with a sigh.

"Arigatou, Megumi-san," Kaoru said softly. "I can't believe I just kind of lost it up there, I'm such a baka."

Megumi shrugged as she said evenly, "Don't beat yourself up over it. You won the top honor, everyone was recognizing that so don't worry about it."

Kaoru sighed again as she reluctantly agreed. "I suppose." She eyed Megumi as she asked, "Megumi, be honest with me, was I a fool all along to think that Kenshin could love me?"

Megumi closed her eyes and sighed then rose to her feet to address Kaoru directly. "Kaoru, let me tell you something. I'm with Sanosuke now and we're pretty serious. But he wasn't my initial choice, I was first drawn to Ken-san and wanted him."

At that declaration Kaoru's eyes were wide as she said, "Really?"

"Aa." The lovely med student continued, "I met them both at the campus radio station when I went there to give them an announcement for a blood drive last semester." She smiled nostalgically as she went on.

"Both guys were so easy to talk to, we just hung around and chatted for a couple of hours and then ended up at **_Guido's_** where we hung out all night. And all night I couldn't take my eyes off of Ken-san. The next day the phone rang and I ran over, hoping it was Ken-san, but it was Sanosuke. Of course I turned him down but he kept trying and I kept turning him down until one night I went into **_Guido's _**and saw Ken-san with Tomoe, very cozy. I knew then that it was a lost cause. So the next day, when I ran into Sanosuke and he asked me out again, I accepted. That was seven months ago."

Kaoru stood in silence as she digested what Megumi told her while the med student spoke in earnest. "Kaoru, Ken-san was devastated when Tomoe died and I saw first hand as he tried to destroy himself. But that changed when he began to spend time with you, I never saw him so happy and content. So I can say this with all honesty, what he did the other night was his way of protecting you from the aftermath of what he did and what his dark side might do. And if I know Ken-san, it was killing him to turn away from you."

Kaoru looked at her with renewed hope. "Really?"

Megumi nodded and then said crisply, "Let's go back before we worry the tori-atama and he embarrasses us more."

Kaoru smiled and nodded in agreement. "Yeah."

They headed out….

Once they were in the foyer, Tsunan pulled Sano over to where the rest rooms were, for some privacy. He spoke in a hushed tone.

"The police called me this afternoon and told me that Kenshin needs to stay at my place a few days while they create a new identity for him and make him disappear."

"Yeah," Sano agreed. "I talked to Saito about it a few days ago after he was arraigned and that was the plan. Is there any problem?"

Tsunan shook his head as he said, "Iie, not at all. I just want to make sure so I don't do or say anything to give him away."

Sano grinned and clapped his friend on the back. "I know, Tsunan. I'm just grateful Kenshin can stay at your place in Choshu while the cops are keeping the dogs at bay."

Unknown to the two men, Kaoru and Megumi exited the ladies room right behind where the men were standing and heard the last statement. Hearing those words, Kaoru catapulted from the door, ran around and confronted the men, her manner demanding and desperate.

"What were you two just saying about Kenshin? Where is he, do you know where he is?" She grabbed Sanosuke with strong hands for one so petite and shook him. "Answer me, Sano damn you!"

Sanosuke and Tsunan were both shocked into inertia as they gaped at the agitated young woman and Tsunan mused ironically to himself _Ha, I guess the saying is true, hell really hath no fury like a woman scorned_ He spoke up as she continued shaking Sano like a dog.

"Hey Kamiya-san, take it easy. You're going to make him lose his supper, you keep shaking him like that."

Kaoru glared at Tsunan and then at the flustered Sano and reluctantly released him. "Fine, I let him go. Now you tell me, where is Kenshin?"

Tsunan shot a glance at Sano who was being tended to by his girlfriend. He shrugged and said tersely, "Tell her, Tsunan. Tell her where Kenshin is."

The artist sighed and began, "He's staying at my beach house in Choshu, in a closed off area near the cliffs."

Kaoru nodded and then demanded, "Now tell me how to get there..."

While the commotion was taking place between Kaoru, Sano and Tsunan, the dark figure from the back of the atrium was hidden behind a decorative silk screen listening to every word, and relayed it into a miniscule headphone.

"Yeah, Himura didn't show for his girlfriend's little art show, he's holed up in Choshu, at the shoreline by the cliffs in a beach house. Yeah, Isao ought to be able to take care of 'im, I'll let him know." He then pressed the earpiece and spoke again.

"Isao it's Yasuhiro, he's holed up in a beach house near the cliffs by in Choshu. Yeah he's there alone so waste 'im." The man called Yasuhiro grinned nastily as he headed to the side exit.

Over at the restrooms the foursome was in a Mexican standoff as Kaoru stood with arms akimbo, waiting for her answer. "Well?"

Sano became nonplussed as he scrambled for a reply. "Well, it's not easy, Jou-chan. The place is kinda….secluded." He glanced at Tsunan for help.

The artist stammered, "Uhhh, he's right Kamiya-san. It's hard to get to in bright daylight and now that it's night it's damn near impossible. Where the road ends there's no lights and it's near the cliff, a 40 foot drop into the sea. I can't let you drive out there tonight."

Sano sent a wink of gratitude to his friend as he affirmed, "Listen to Tsunan, it's his beach house so he ought to know."

Megumi chimed in. "The guys are right, Kaoru. Why don't you wait till tomorrow, when it's bright. Ken-san will still be there and you know he would never forgive us if we let you go and something happened to you."

Kaoru stared at the three stubborn faces before her and saw an immovable wall so she reluctantly acquiesced. "Okay fine, you win. But I'm going out there first thing in the morning so you'd better tell me the directions."

Tsunan reached in his jacket pocket for a notebook and pen. "I'll write them down for you, Kamiya-san right now." And he scrawled the directions to the beach house as Sano watched dubiously.

_I got a bad feeling about this _he said to himself. . . .

**CONTINUED IN…..ENDED WITH A CRY, PART 2**


	16. Chapter 16 ENDED WITH A CRY, PT2

_Author's Note: Here's part 2 of Ended With A Cry, with angsty fluff for every Kenshin/Kaoru fan. And the Neil Young song "Expecting to Fly" does not belong to me but is in my opinion the most poignant and beautiful rock ballad ever and perfect for the final scene. If you can find it listen to it and you'll agree._

**ENDED WITH A CRY, PART 2**

At the beach house Kenshin had the heavy front door bolted and chained as the police had instructed. He sat in the dimly lit main room, the bamboo shades drawn over the one window and the curtains over the sliding door. They were thick linen but not so thick that the sound of the crashing waves could not be heard filtering through. It was a soothing sound but Kenshin was tense, his ki on fire as he sensed an ominous presence outside. He stared at an object on the bar near him with a sense of ambivalence.

It was a loaded 9mm pistol, left earlier by Saito as he and Okura came to fill him in on the plan for his "disappearence". The two detectives had come to let him know that paperwork was being drawn up to explain why he vanished for the university and Hiko since he was still his adoptive father and only known family member. After that was explained to him, they gave him back his sword, which he was glad of and left the gun, much to his dismay.

_Kuso_ Kenshin swore as he picked up the weapon, and felt how uncustomary its heaviness was in his palm, not like the hilt of a sword which felt as almost an extension of his hand as his soul united with the soul of the blade. Although Hiko had taught him how to handle a gun as well as a sword with this cold feel of the steel he could sense the grim promise of death in the gun and it sent a chill through him. But he had also accepted the fact that he was now thrust into a position of kill or be killed, a vicious cycle that started with the first life he took in that rainy alley days ago. Saito and Okura had made that clear when they left the weapon.

Morbidly curious Kenshin slipped open the magazine and saw the cartridge, loaded with carbon bullets, the ones that explode upon impact. Okura explained that although they still shot to maim and not to kill, when dealing with the yakuza frequently one had to revert to their level, pure survival of the fittest in the concrete jungle. It was an excuse that rang hollow and tasted bitter to him. With a snort of disgust, he snapped the magazine shut and replaced the gun back on the bar then got up to go into the kitchen for a beer.

He opened the refridgerator and withdrew a bottle, twisting off the cap but as he was about to take a long draught, his ki rung inside with urgency. He put the bottle down, going to the bar and taking the 9mm in hand, Kenshin crept over to the glass door, his ears keenly seaching for any noise but the rhythmic crashing of the surf. Hearing nothing but the sounds of the sea he was about to return to the kitchen to retrieve his beer when he heard a small rustling, between the sound of the waves.

Now sure that someone was out in the woods that surrounded the house, Kenshin flipped off the safety and dousing the one lamp, slid the door open and tiptoed onto the weathered deck. The night was dark, the last quarter of the waning moon hidden behind a long cloud bank but his adenaline flowed and heightened his senses as he cautiously made his way to the wooded area flanking the house. Kenshin walked with the silence of a cat, his dark side aiding him by making him acutely wary as one who is the hunted.

Holding the gun at the ready, Kenshin made his way into the thick brush, scanning the foliage, alert to any movement as he made as little noise as possible. He was nearly to the clearing at lands end when his sharp eyes spotted a shadow in a line of bushes in the distance near the cliff and so alerted he hit the dirt as a pop sounded and a bullet nearly grazed him. His heart pounding, Kenshin could feel the fury of his dark side emerging in self-preservation. His now amber eyes began to seek out his attacker ready to turn the tables as he saw the shadow moving so he got up and took aim, firing at the shadow as it leaped into the brush, ducking for cover.

In the bushes Isao the yakuza assassin was panting as he realized that this was no random sitting duck hit, but Himura was armed and knew how to use the rod he was packing. He took a deep breath to regain his composure and looked up at the clouds still obscuring the moon, cursing.

_Kuso, I had no idea this kid was like this. This ain't gonna be an easy job here in the dark, figures the moon would be hid._ Isao opened his clip and examined the bullets in the chamber of his revolver, now regretting that he did not have his automatic as he might have to reload if this cat and mouse game lasted…

Meanwhile Kenshin remained motionless as he tried to figure a way to disable his predator, his mind coldly calculating his next move. He was glad that he had done some exploring of the surrounding area earlier, ennui driving him out of the house and so he felt he was one up on the killer. His eyes scanned the bushes where he had seen the man leap as his shot was fired and he was dismayed as he saw nothing. Then the moon peeked out as the seemingly endless bank of clouds passed and its pale light offered some illumination, shining directly onto the bushes that were nearly in the clearing before the cliff…

Isao saw the moon and with an oily grin he saw the provision and felt fortuitous. He now used every bit of experience as the Honshu's top assassin as his eyes focused on the brush in which he knew Himura was hiding and then gleefully noticed a patch of white in the brush, the kid's T-shirt. He cocked the revolver and checked the silencer before he moved out, unaware it would be his last move…

But Kenshin's keen ears heard the click of the hammer and so mobilized moved swiftly to the rear, remembering Hiko's teachings of Sun-Tsu using the scenery as his cover. He saw the shadow of the killer move out into the clearing almost right before him and still under cover, took aim and fired hitting Isao in the chest.

"Ahhhh!" the killer screamed as the force of the almost point-blank bullet sent him staggering to the edge of the cliff and he toppled over, his death cry echoing among the whooshing of the pounding surf.

Taking a deep breath, Kenshin extracted himself from his cover and still holding the smoking gun, he got down on his knees and peered over into the swirling eddies caused by the breakers. He saw as the tide took the corpse of the man who wanted to kill him into the depths of the sea, lit by the dim glow of the crescent moon. After a while he then rose slowly and with no expression, headed back to the house.

Once inside, Kenshin plodded over to the bar and put the 9mm down, flipping the safety as he stood back detesting it as if it were some vile thing. He then turned away and staring at his right hand in the dark said tonelessly, "Another life taken by this hand."

He then headed to the bedroom to try to sleep.

………………………………………………………………………

The next day was bright with an early summer sun, blue sky with puffy cumulous clouds dotting the clime like cotton balls. In spite of that Kaoru drove slowly along the road with great care, not wanting to miss the dirt road that led to Tsunan's hideaway. She gripped the wheel with steely determination as she spoke a silent soliloquy.

_Kenshin, that baka! I'm not just going to accept his turning from me, from us. Whether he wants to or not he's going to accept that I'm as deep in this as he is and he'd better get used to that._

Her indigo eyes focused behind sunglasses, Kaoru scanned the directions Tsunan wrote for her tacked on her visor and the Celica crept along, the road becoming more narrow as she got closer to the road's end. Then she saw it, the landmark of a huge boulder just before the turn so she slowed down to stop.

She took a deep breath, her heart hammering as she said, "Well, this is it," and turned into the dirt and stony road leading to the cliff. . . .

After a sleepless night in his futon still clad in just his shorts Kenshin lay with his titian head propped in his arms, brooding over how in the space of less than a week, he had become a cold blooded killer. Although fear of what he did was prominent the thing that frightened him most was the ease of which he had done so. Last night and the night he killed Tobei his dark side took over and his heart felt void and remorseless as he reasoned away the two slayings, one being to protect his life and the other his beloved yet his soul felt cold and barren, bleak as a winter landscape. Considering what had happened last night with what was obviously a yakuza hit man, he began to seriously wonder if staying at the beach house was wise.

_Humph, if they were after me before, they'll really be after me now. Maybe I should just get lost, fast._

Dark thoughts engulfing him, Kenshin was preoccupied with thoughts of fleeing until his ki alerted him that someone had come, the sound of a vehicle stopping and a car door opening prompting him to shoot out of the futon. He quickly donned his jeans and headed out to the main area of the beach house, grabbing the automatic. Slipping off the safety, he crept over to the door as he heard soft footfalls, flipping like the person was wearing sandals. Deciding that whoever the visitor was would have to seek him out in the beach house, Kenshin quietly unlocked the front door and cracked it open, looking for a vehicle and seeing the car down the road, he stepped cautiously out to see who it was…

Meanwhile, Kaoru was walking around the beach house, scanning the building and noticing thedarkened window she wondered if Kenshin was really in there. She got right up to the side and standing on her toes, tried to peek inside.

Kenshin, however, only saw the pert feminine form from the back, her long raven locks blowing in the offshore breeze and mused in disgust how the yakuza was now stooping to sending women to do their dirty work so he made his way steathily and raised the gun to point at the girl.

_Well if she's trying to take me out, I won't go easy on her either _"Turn around slowly and don't make any sudden moves," he growled, his eyes amber slits.

Shocked and frightened by the threat Kaoru did as she was told and was face to face with Kenshin whose eyes widened and changed to lavender as he recognized the woman who owned his heart. "K-Kaoru?" he sputtered as he lowered the automatic. "What are you doing here?"

Her sapphire pools were wide as saucers as she recovered from her initial surprise and then she responded in typical fashion by boxing Kenshin smartly on the ears. "Kenshin no baka! You scared me."

"Owww!" he protested as he rubbed his ears with one hand as he flipped the safety and tucked the gun in the waistband of his jeans. "That hurt."

"Humph! You're lucky I don't have a bokken, baka. Now tell me what in Kami's name are you doing with a gun?" Kaoru demanded, her hands on her hips.

Relieved but still wary, Kenshin glanced around and saw nobody else so he took hold of Kaoru's elbow and urged, "Let's go inside and I'll tell you."

He guided her to the front door and led her in, following and closing the door, locking it securely and using the chain as Kaoru strolled to the middle of the room and glanced around at the casually furnished beach house. She was admiring a watercolor of a tidal pool over the mantle when Kenshin sighed heavily and strode over to the bar to perch on a stool.

She kept staring at the painting as she asked, "So tell me, Kenshin. What are you doing carrying a gun?"

He deadpanned, "You answer me first, Kaoru. What are you doing here?"

Kaoru turned and faced him dead on. "I came to talk to you."

Unnerved by those ocean pools he turned away and said flatly, "I said everything I wanted to you the other night. So it was a wasted trip."

Her gaze never wavered. "I don't believe you,"

He snorted, "Suit yourself. But I meant what I said."

Now Kaoru was annoyed as she came to Kenshin and inquired, "Then why couldn't you look me in the eye and say it?" She reached for his chin to turn it to her. "You still can't, huh?"

At her challenge Kenshin's amethyst eyes defiantly met hers then he wrenched away and suddenly leapt up grabbing her by the shoulders, his hands biting into the soft flesh. "Do you really want me to hurt you so much?" he snapped as he leaned close with a scowl. "Do you?"

Bravado chased away by a fieceness he had never displayed toward her Kaoru shook her head and so he continued, "Then do us both a favor, Kaoru. Leave now and forget you ever saw me." he pushed her roughly away and muttered, "Go on and live a happy life."

She stood there suspended by the harsh words of rejection, blinking back tears as she whispered, "I can't, not without you."

Kenshin closed his eyes as her words caused them to sting with tears. But he swallowed hard and tried to be as cold as he could. "I'm afraid you'll have to. Now get out of here."

Kaoru was still frozen, her heart constricting painfully as she shook her head in disbelief, not wanting to accept the words he spoke so he tried again, this time shouting the words.

"Didn't you hear me? I said GET OUT!" Kenshin roared, his eyes showing an amber tint.

That did it. Now sobbing brokenheartedly Kaoru wanted to get away from him as fast as possible so she ran to the door and fumbled with the lock. She managed to get the door unlocked but her vision was completely blurred by her tears so when she opened the door to flee, she realized that the chain was still on so she tried to undo it, failing in her efforts and causing her to sob harder.

The sound of Kaoru's anguish and the sight of her futile attempts at undoing the stubborn chain lock was what did it for Kenshin. His resolve shattered like fine crystal on a stone floor and he sprinted to her, encircling her in his arms as he buried his face in her hair, murmuring words of comfort in her ear.

"Shhhhh, don't cry aka-chan, onegai don't cry I can't stand it. Forgive me for hurting you so."

He took hold of Kaoru's shoulders and turned her to face him. Her face was veiled by her midnight strands so he took hold of her chin, tilting it up so he could look into her eyes. With his fingers, Kenshin tenderly brushed the rivulets away while her sobs subsided then cradled her face as he brought his lips down on the tracks left by her tears and then on hers, kissing her like a starving man devouring a meal. She responded with a soft moan, snaking her arms about his bare chest and pressing herself into him. They contined kissing each other with a desperation borne from being apart and then finally they drew away, gasping. Kenshin then wrapped his arm about her shoulders to lead her down to the living area where they sat together on the sofa as he mused in a soft tenor.

"Why is it that my strongest convictions and firmest resolves fall totally apart when I see tears in these beautiful eyes?" Kenshin's fingers caressed her drying cheeks, wiping away the remaning residue of her sorrow as she pulled away to look right at him.

She murmured, "Can I ask you a question?"

"Of course."

"Why are you hiding here and carrying a gun?" Kaoru asked quietly. "Onegai Kenshin, answer me."

Kenshin sighed and withdrew his arm from around her to lean forward and stare ahead sullenly as he mulled over her question, trying to come up with a truthful and believable answer, not an easy task.

"Because of what I did." His voice was low and weighed down with the simple but blunt statement.

"Killing Tobei?"

Kenshin nodded as he added, "To begin with. And especially after last night."

Kaoru was instantly alert. "Why? What happened last night?" At her question Kenshin turned away from her probing eyes. "Kenshin, tell me!"

He got up wearily and began to pace. "Koibito, Tobei was a lot more dangerous than either of us figured. First of all, Saito and Okura said it was him that shot at us at the river that day."

"It was?" Kaoru was incredulous. "How did they find that out?"

"Saito searched his truck and found an automatic rifle with shells."

She swallowed hard as she said, "Is that true?"

"Aa." Kenshin continued, "And that's not all." He ran a nervous hand through his unruly and unbound red hair as he went on. "He was a family member of a drug lord of the Honshu yakuza, selling drugs at the university and smuggling them in from the continent."

Stunned, Kaoru said slowly, "And all this time I thought he was just a creep who wouldn't take no for an answer stalking me." She clutched her arms and shivered, fear sending an icy finger down her spine. "Kenshin, he wanted to get even with me for the time I hit him."

"I know."

She became panicked as she said trembling, "He was going to kill me." Then realization dawned as she knew the truth and trembled even more.

Kenshin came forward and enfolded her in his arms. "He's dead now, tenshi. You don't have to be afraid." His hand cradled her head and pressed it to his shoulder but Kaoru shook it free and she pushed back to look directly at him.

"I'm not afraid for me, I'm afraid for you." She distentangled herself as she added, "I know what this means for you, Kenshin. It means that the yakuza will now come after you." Her eyes then lit with dread as she stated, "That's what happened last night, isn't it?"

Reluctantly Kenshin nodded as he replied, "I sensed someone outside and went with the gun to take a look. Then I saw him and we both exchanged shots. But he was unacustomed to the area and came out of hiding looking for me so I shot him and he fell over the cliff." He ran another hand through his hair as he sat down put his head in his hands and muttered, "In one week I've killed two people."

Her eyes soft with sympathy Kaoru sat beside him and wrapped a slim arm about his slumped shoulders. "To protect me and defend yourself, anata. He was going to kill you. In either case you had no choice."

"Maybe," Kenshin said tonelessly. He raised his head and stared blankly in place as he continued, "And maybe if my darkness hadn't taken control of me, I would have stopped before they lost their lives." He got up and almost shouting went on.

"Both times I lost to the dark side. It happens every time I lose my temper or I'm threatened. But that's not the whole story, Kaoru." He knelt before her and clasped her hands as he entreated to her. "I don't remember when I slip into darkness and it's like I'm in another dimension, like I have tunnel vision and I become almost a machine, not satisfied until my enemy is defeated." He squeezed her hands as he finished, "It happened that time at kendo practice when I faced you. Thank Kami that I had a memory of us at the river, it snapped me out of it and I refused to fight you."

Kaoru nodded, "I remember."

Kenshin lowered his head and spoke in a broken voice. "It scares me, aka-chan. Those times become like voids in my mind and when I come out, someone's hurt or now---," he paused and looked up with tears in his eyes, "dead."

Kaoru bit her lip and threw her arms around him holding him as he wept. "Oh Kenshin…"

It was late afternoon and the sky began to be colored with its golden cloak of the waning day, spattered with purple mackerel clouds edged in pink as the sun made its descent into the waves. After his anguish was spent, Kenshin and Kaoru went out into the bright afternoon sun to stroll along the beach, talking but mostly sharing deep kisses full of love and longing. They were acting as if it were their last time together, believing that indeed it was and as such their embraces were desperate and haunting. Now several hours later they sat on the sea wall, entwined in each others' arms, watching the evolving seascape as the stereo sent strains of Neil Young from the open glass door.

The words from "Expecting to Fly" floated over on the breeze as the couple were locked in their own world and their own thoughts, each unknowingly thinking the same thing. And the words of the song playing over and over just enforced the knowledge of the inevitable parting.

_**There you stood on the edge of your feather,**_

_**Expecting to fly.**_

_**While I laughed,**_

_**I wondered whether**_

_**I could say goodbye**_

Kaoru sighed as she lay against Kenshin's chest, "That song is so sad but so beautiful." She turned to look up at him and remarked, "Neil Young was playing the night we first met, remember?"

He gazed down lovingly as he nodded, "I remember, tenshi. I came to bum dinner from my friend Misao and met the beautiful artist who became the best friend I ever had and the love of my life." He captured her mouth and drank once again of its sweet nectar, his tongue savoring her as his hands reached beneath her top and his fingers caressed the satin surface of her skin.

Kaoru moaned softly as she tasted him with as much gusto, matching him tit for tat as her hands fluttered over his bare skin. He was still clad in only his jeans, his long titian locks flying in the sea wind, mixing with her own raven tresses as they remained locked together.

_**By the summer it was healing,**_

_**We had said goodbye.**_

_**All the years**_

_**we'd spent with feeling**_

_**Ended with a cry,**_

They drew apart and Kenshin said quietly, "As much as I don't want this to end, we have to face facts. I'm a hunted man now and because of that, we have to---,"

A slender finger to his lips hushed his statement. "Don't say it, Kenshin."

He took hold of Kaoru's hand and kissed the finger she used to shush him. "I have to, koibito. We need to accept that whatever plans and dreams we had are not going to happen."

Kaoru hook her head and buried it in his chest. "Iie, iie!" Her eyes filled with tears again as she clung to him, sobbing brokenly.

Sighing Kenshin closed his eyes as at the sound of Kaoru's sobs it was like his heart was being torn from his chest, piece by piece. He gently stroked her as the music surrounded them with melancholy.

_**I tried so hard to stand**_

_**As I stumbled**_

_**and fell to the ground.**_

_**So hard to laugh as I fumbled**_

_**And reached for the love I found,**_

_**Knowin' it was gone.**_

_**If I never lived without you,**_

_**Now you know I'd die.**_

_**If I never said I loved you,**_

_**Now you know I'd try,**_

The sky above was darkening as the sun dipped lower into the sea. Soon it would be nightfall, and with it the new moon, pitch dark making safe travel back to Tokyo near impossible. So Kenshin reluctantly released Kaoru and rose to his feet, offering his hand down to assist her.

Sniffling, she glanced at his hand waiting silently, patiently so she reached inside for the last scrap of resilience she possessed and took hold of it, getting to her feet as he gazed at her with warm amethyst orbs filled with love.

"Come on, aka-chan. I'll walk you to your car."

She nodded gravely as she fell in step with him and he wrapped his arm about her, walking around the house to the dirt road where her Celica was parked. He stopped just at the front of the hood and placed his hands on her shoulders.

"So you'll be leaving here?" Kaoru asked in a little girl voice.

Kenshin nodded. "Since the yakuza knows where I am it makes sense. I don't want to put Tsunan in danger and if I'm at a house he owns, they'll start hounding him. I don't want that on me so right after you leave, I'm splitting."

Kaoru's eyes brightened with a brief spark of hope. "I can go with you." But it was extinguished with his next words.

"Absolutely not." Kenshin shook his head adamantly, not brooking any argument.

However Kaoru was undaunted. With a bright smile she continued as if she had not heard him. "Why we could leave right now and head anywhere you want. I'll clean out my bank account and---,"

But Kenshin was the proverbial immovable object even against the irresistable force of his beloved, his desire for her safety was the buffer against her wiles and he stood his ground.

"You can not go with me Kaoru, it's too dangerous and I won't have you involved."

"But I'm already involved," she insisted but he put a firm hand on her shoulder and shook his head again.

"The answer is NO. And that's final."

Kaoru's heart plummeted as reality sunk in and she knew he was not going to change his mind no matter how much pleading she did. With a sigh she nodded, her head low and eyes averted. "W-where are you going to go?"

He shrugged. "Don't know. Maybe head north or south, wherever I can hitchhike."

"What about the plan with the police to give you a new identity?"

Kenshin shook his head in doubt. "Since last night I've been thinking about that plan and I don't see how I can wait for them to set it up. I mean, nobody was supposed to know about this beach house here and there was an attempted hit on me. So I figured it's best for me to go and try to disappear on my own."

Kaoru sighed as she said, "I guess." She asked, "So that's it, huh?"

"I'm afraid so." He smiled, a pain filled bittersweet expression that sent another knife into her heart.

Swallowing hard Kaoru nodded as Kenshin took hold of her hand and reached in his jeans pocket for something. He drew out a shell; the one he found the other day on the beach when he first arrived, and placed it in her upturned palm then covered it with his own.

"Aka-chan, listen to me. I want you to have this shell as a reminder and a special wish from me to be strong. I need you to be strong for me Kaoru, as I know you can." He reached and took hold of her chin to raise her head to meet his eyes. "Promise me you will."

She nodded barely able to speak. "I promise."

"And when you feel alone and are losing hope, take out this shell and remember that no matter where I am, I love you and will love you forever." His eyes glowing like jewels he took the hand of hers holding the shell and held it to his chest. "My heart is yours for always."

With his declaration the tears began flowing like a flood. She sobbed, "W-will I ever see you again?"

Kenshin smiled another painful smile. "Who knows? Maybe when this all blows over, we'll find our way back to each other."

At those words Kaoru threw herself into his arms, her heart shattering as she begged him, "Onegai Kenshin, tell me everything's going to be all right."

Her tears wetting his chest as his arms crushed her tight Kenshin's own voice broke as he replied thickly, "I wish I could tenshi, that I truly do. But I can't, not now. That's why you have to be strong." He cupped her tear-stained face in his hands for one last kiss, warm and insistent as his mouth drew the honey once more to commit the taste of her to memory.

Kaoru responded, reveling in him as she kissed him deeply to leave an impression that he could carry until they met again. And there in Kenshin's arms she resolved _we will meet again._

They finally broke apart as the red glow of the sunset caused the shadows to lengthen and fireflies fluttered around them, tiny pinpoint glows that added to the aching beauty that would be etched in their memories for all eternity. Kenshin said gently but firmly, "You'd better get going, the light's fading fast. And don't forget to wear your safety belt."

"Uh, yeah." Kaoru went over and opened the car door then climbed behind the wheel. She inserted the key into the ignition and started the car, making sure she buckled the safety belt as per Kenshin's directive.

He leaned over the open window and met her lips in a final kiss then pulled away. "Sayonara, watashi no koishii Kaoru. Be good."

She murmured, "Sayonara, watashi no itoshii Kenshin. Take care of yourself."

He grinned and gave a thumbs up and so she shifted into reverse, backed and turned to head down the dirt road, leaving a cloud of dust as Kenshin watched her drive slowly away, his heart in shreds. When she had vanished, he turned around and walked back into the beach house.

An hour later the sun had gone down and darkness shrouded the beach house as the front door opened and Kenshin emerged, carrying his duffle bag, the hilt of the heirloom sword protruding from its top. He closed the door tightly and after making sure it was secure, headed down the dirt road that led to the main one. Fireflies blinking in accompaniment, he used his sensitive vision to use the faint starlight in the night sky to guide his way and within another hour, he was at the main road.

Kenshin sighed as weariness set in and he looked down the road, seeing no one in sight so he hoisted the bag and began his journey. His heart was heavy but he steeled his resolve and made himself a promise…

Whatever the road ahead held, whatever bumps and curves, he would do two things: one, stay alive and two, make his way back ….to Kaoru.

Because he had to.

**END….BOOK 1**

**TO BE CONTINUED IN BOOK 2…..BLUE PERIOD---BLUE SKY**


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